zombie dogs
[17:51] Threnody: Holy cats it's a London. Threnody has been up for a little while and managed to get herself water and put all 430543 miles of her hair into a ponytail, but she's still kind of, uh. Recovering. Where the hell are her boots--oh, over there. They can stay there, for that matter.
[17:53] Abberline: What timing! Fred returns, maybe not too triumphant, but it's a return anyway. He steps through the door and sets his jacket over the hook on the wall; he's carrying a grocery bag and, if Threnody is the sort to notice, pings a little different today, as he's not 'turned off'.
[17:55] * Threnody streeeetches, ridiculously, because couches are not as a rule the most comfortable places to sleep in the world, and does in fact notice the slight difference. She isn't quite alert enough to guess what's going on, though. "Hey."
[17:57] Abberline: "Evenin'. Sleep well enough?" Door is closed, and he walks behind the sofa and sets his bag on a little table against the wall to dig through it.
[18:00] Threnody: "Mmhmm. Thanks." She rests her elbows on her knees, reverting to boyish posture out of ... laziness, basically. "You went shopping, huh?"
[18:01] * Abberline gets out a bottle of whatever the default "yellow" flavor of Gatorade is, and hands it to her, plus a travel bottle of tylenol. "I did."
[18:03] Threnody: "Ohh, clever." She laughs a little, then ... winces, and waves it off. Gatorade + tylenol = hangover success! \o/ "I'd think you'd have some crazy space remedy. Being from the future and all." :D
[18:06] Abberline: "Culture gets pretty stagnant starting in the 1990s. I think it'll pick up with the space-age futuristic things in... 2060 or so? Could be off." He shrugs.
[18:08] Threnody: "...noted." She gives him a kind of amused look over the gatorade. "Thanks. You get into trouble at work?"
[18:09] Abberline: "No, no, I wasn't scheduled.. not even on call.. they just had a problem, and I'm sort of the go-to guy if they're fucked on something." He sounds mild, and he sits down across from her. "Turned out to just be a... misunderstanding."
[18:11] Threnody: "Mm?" She figures he'll elaborate if he wants, but she's curious.
[18:14] * Abberline just sort of looks torn between amusement and exasperation for a moment, before he lights a cigarette and gives a wry smile. "Ah, well.. I get there, and they've been at the scene for something like ten hours. Adult male,mid fifties, shot to the head with a shotgun - buckshot, not pretty. Really, really bad. Had to ID him with fingerprints. They couldn't /find/ parts of his head. His wife, who was apparently mail order from Thailand, had been trying to clean it up. And was still arguing /something/ about cultural rites when I got there."
[18:16] Abberline: been trying to clean it up. And was still arguing /something/ about cultural rites when I got there."
[18:17] Threnody: "...cultural rights. Bullshit, bet she did it." Thanks for that, T, you are an amazingly cynical young woman. "I hate buckshot. I've been shot at with that, it hurts like a motherfucker."
[18:17] Threnody: rites*
[18:17] Abberline: "Yes, well... no GSR on her hands, her prints weren't on the gun, she says he killed himself. No evidence to the contrary." Eyebrow.
[18:19] Threnody: "Guy orders a mail-order chick from Thailand, he's not gonna treat her real well; he doesn't /have/ to, she's his property, he thinks. She turned on him somehow." Decisive! Possibly she prefers this solution to actual suicide, because T likes revenge fare. "Bet you she had /something/ to do with it."
[18:20] Abberline: "Well... turned out... they had a dog. Which wasn't there." Ominous silence.
[18:20] Threnody: "...wait what." She eyes him with confusion.
[18:21] Abberline: "So we have to start looking for the damn dog, because... missing pieces of his head... missing dog..."
[18:22] Threnody: "This is why I'm not a dog person," she says, immediately, loling, because this is horrible but oh my god what the fuck.
[18:24] Abberline: "And I know - I just fucking know - we've got to get to dog. So I send out everybody looking for the dog, and everyone's pissed off at me, because they all think it's the wife and she's lying and it's pretty clear aside from the missing evidence, and I'm like, "No, after the dog!" In fucking London... a few hours later I get a call from a local PC on the other side of town that there's a dog loose /in the grave yard/."
[18:25] Abberline: *get the
[18:25] Threnody: "......................" T says, animatedly half-horrified and half-amused all over again. "Are you implying what I think you are."
[18:26] Abberline: "SO. Basically. I get there, and it's just the groundskeeper and this local constable, poor bastard, and we have to go look for the fucking dog which is, yes, digging up graves and eating things, because it apparently... really.. liked it's owner's head." Deadpan.
[18:27] Threnody: "Well." She pauses. "That's. So what happened to Cujo? I mean, it just got a taste for human flesh, horror flick-esque? Or was it some full-on supernatural what-the-fuck?"
[18:29] Abberline: "Oh no, s'normal dog. Bit of a fucked up dog, apparently this bloke fed it raw meat and beat it and had it as a guard dog and all that - but I've not slept and am hungover at this point, with this constable I don't know, looking for a dog in a grave yard. And it's foggy because it's England, s'how it is here, and from out of the mist comes this -- zombie dog --" hand gestures go here "--and it latches onto PC Smith's leg."
[18:30] Threnody: "... 'course it does." She is imagining this scenario in her head now, of course.
[18:32] * Abberline rubs over his eyes slightly. SIGH. "It.. could have been a horror film, with the screaming and... sort of flailing that her majesty's police force really shouldn't exhibit."
[18:36] Threnody: "You've had a hell of a day," she notes, mildly, "Did you get any sleep at all?"
[18:37] Abberline: "Not really, but I'm used to it." He puts out his cigarette. "Anyway, it turns out this bloke was some insane gun fanatic, was cleaning his shotgun like a damn fool, the dog scared him, shot him in the head, the wife's scream scared the dog, and she got scared and though she'd get deported so she tried to clean it up.. and.. PC Smith got a very manly scar." The end.
[18:37] Abberline: *shot himself in the head
[18:37] Abberline: *thought
[18:37] Abberline: *ilu typos
[18:38] Threnody: "Lucky PC. What's going to happen to the wife?" She is going to go investigate your groceries now, Fred. ... dear Threnody: boundaries, some people have them.
[18:40] Abberline: Said groceries are just some eggs and juice and another sports drink. "Oh, she's fine, they're letting her off on account of putting 'zombie dog' in the report is a laugh you don't get very day. And it'd just be a misdemenor for interfering with an investigation, anyway."
[18:40] Abberline: *every
[18:41] Threnody: "Immigration for that sort of thing is different in the States," she comments, "They'd deport her there. I realize this is a horrible question contextually, but I basically have no sense of being appalled by anything anymore, so--you hungry?"
[18:42] Abberline: "Not really, but I should probably eat. Do you like breakfast food?"
[18:44] Threnody: "Mhm. I already looked around your kitchen when I was getting water, by the way." What, everyone does that when they're left alone in a stranger's home, don't they?
[18:44] * Abberline looks faintly amused - he'd given her the okay, after all. "I can make omlets."
[18:44] Abberline: +e
[18:46] Threnody: "Yeah?" She grins a bit. "Let me help?"
[18:58] Abberline: "Sure." He stands up, stretching his arms above his head for a moment, just working out some kinks, and heads to the kitchen. "Do you cook much?"
[19:00] Threnody: "Sometimes. I'm not bad at it--not as good as I wanted to be, but..." She shrugs. "You any good at it?"
[19:00] * Threnody goes along to the kitchen, obvs.
[19:01] * Abberline makes a sort of non-committal noise. "Haven't killed anyone with it yet." He rolls up the sleeves of his dress shirt and washes his hands.
[19:05] Threnody: "Well...good." She will wait her turn at the sink, leaning against the counter absently. "First thing I ever made on my own was spaghetti, I think. It took a couple tries."
[19:05] Abberline: "Pasta weirds me out." :| He gets the eggs.
[19:06] Threnody: "It weirds you out? What?" She stares at him.
[19:07] * Abberline begins digging through the fridge for things to put in an omelet. "Well... pasta didn't really make it to England until later, particularly if you were middle to lower class. It's strange and unnatural."
[19:08] Threnody: "Strange and unnatural," she repeats, laughing again, "It is /not/. You're just not used to it."
[19:43] Abberline: "It is, all right? It's not supposed to be shaped like that. Do you like vegetables and meat, or just vegetables?"
[19:45] Threnody: "Don't care, whatever's best--and it is /not/, you fucking weirdo. You're going to have to get used to it." Be...cause why, Threnody.
[19:50] * Abberline gets some things to be chopped up. "Why?" >/
[19:52] * Threnody will ... do something useful, the typist is not sure what. Possibly chopping other things. "Because it's /good/, and you're ignoring an entire food group because it's 'shaped funny'! Besides, pasta comes in a lot of different shapes."
[19:52] * Abberline gives her some... ham, or something, to cut up, and he works on the veggies. "I'm all right with raviolli."
[19:54] Threnody: "There's a start!" She just can't fathom not liking 90% of Italian food out there, forgive her.
[19:55] Abberline: "I'll need another few lifetimes to eat noodles."
[19:56] Threnody: "Noooo," she drawls, "I'll work on you about it, see if I don't."
[19:57] * Abberline gives her a suspicious look. "... I hated a Chinese woman." And he STILL HATES NOODLES, ok.
[19:57] Abberline: *dated. ffs.
[19:58] Threnody: "Okay, Italian food and Chinese food are /not remotely comparable/, goddamn it, you're just being difficult now." SHE HAS A MISSION, FRED. A mission of ... ridiculousness.
[19:59] Abberline: "They both use noodles, and they're WEIRD." He's not giving up on this. Chopchop, veggies.
[20:01] Threnody: "They're goddamn delicious and I'll prove it. Somehow." B|!! ... right, making omelettes.
[20:02] Abberline: "Oh? And how will you be proving this if /I'm not eating them/?" he sets the chopped veggies aside and begins to crack eggs into a bowl.
[20:06] Threnody: "You will," she threatens, mock-solemn, "Just wait."
[20:06] * Abberline holds out the bowl of eggs. "... Ham me." Completely deadpan, of course.
[20:09] Threnody: "I suspect it's too late." What does that even MEAN. Anyway, here, ham.
[20:10] Abberline: Ba-dum-ching. Maybe. He puts in the vegetables and.. whisks. He's v manly.
[20:13] * Threnody glances around, kind of thoughtfully. "Speaking of weird, being in a normal kitchen again is...in that vein. For some reason." The reasons of 'apocalypse'. "Although I continue to maintain there must be something crazy and space-futurey about this place."
[20:13] * Abberline begins to make omelets. "Oh? What qualifies as crazy and space-futurey?"
[20:15] Threnody: "... anything that looks like it belongs in a sci-fi movie from 2008. Alternatively anything that levitates and shouldn't."
[20:16] Abberline: "I don't think I've seen many sci fi films..." he flips one omlete over in the pan.
[20:17] Threnody: "No? You should watch the ones about aliens, they're fucking hilarious. And wrong, usually." ... aliens come to visit Marvel Earth a lot. :(
[20:23] * Abberline doesn't watch many.. anything films. Flips the omelete and puts it on a plate. Ta-da.
[20:28] Threnody: "Success!" \o/ Anyway. "I hope you've at least seen Cujo, otherwise my pop culture references from earlier are gonna get lost."
[20:29] Abberline: "I've heard of it." He makes another one.
[20:31] Threnody: "Stephen King is a /mess/, I don't know what the hell his deal is with dogs." She pauses. "Shouldn't make jokes about that, with the Nexus, the damn thing is liable to show up."
[20:32] Abberline: "That's a mildly distressing thought," he muses. "Would you like anything to drink?"
[20:36] Threnody: "... I shouldn't have anything alcoholic. Neither should you." AND YET, you're both horrible boozehounds. She settles down at the nearest table convenient for omelette-having. "Nah, I'm good, I think. Thanks."
[20:38] Abberline: "I mean juice or something, you know." The nearest table being the kitchen table, which is small but fine for two people, and thankfully not covered in paperwork.
[20:39] Threnody: "My brain is still on booze, lemme alone," she grins a little at him, and then sets about eating, finally.
[20:48] * Abberline sits down with his plate, and a glass of water, sort of eating.
[20:50] * Threnody will B| at him to make sure he actually finishes, mind. She picks at her omelette for a second. "So is this weird? Semi-relatedly, belatedly?"
[20:51] Abberline: "What do you mean, weird?"
[20:52] Threnody: "Just. You must be bored, or something, letting me avoid going home this way." She's like 25 years old and refuses to go home. SO MATURE. Or...well, no, her reasons aren't terrible, but still.
[21:30] Abberline: "I've passed out drunk on enough peoples sofas to feel I have dept to repay... hangover karma, maybe."
[21:33] Threnody: "Yeah, Elizabeth mentioned." Heh.
[21:44] Abberline: "I fear she will not be the last." And definitely was not the first. "And it isn't as if I find your company offensive."
[21:56] Threnody: "Despite my best efforts? She mentioned you made an impression on Hamlet, also."
[21:56] Abberline: "I like dogs, so long as they're not zombies."
[21:58] Threnody: "Mm. Animals don't tend to like me." Something to do with the energysucking death aura, idk. "Guess that one's okay, though. Anyway--it was /alive/, it wasn't a real zombie!"
[21:58] Abberline: "It was eating dead flesh. It was on its way."
[22:00] Threnody: "That's not what's required for being a zombie. I'd know."
[22:01] Abberline: "I've only seen one zombie film. How accurate are they?" Oh, this is a great breakfast topic.
[22:02] Threnody: "Not very. Depends on the make and mode, though." Hey, she's almost done with her breakfast! She gestures loosely. "Mine were...nigh indestructible; you had to take the head off, and they regenerated everything else." Yes just drop that in there, that you MAKE ZOMBIES, T. "I've seen generic ones, though."
[22:03] * Abberline isn't eating much more than half of his meal - typical for him. "... I've seen Shaun of the Dead."
[22:04] Threnody: "That's a comedy, so." Teachers pick at teaching practices in movies, apparently necromantic mutants pick at zombies.
[22:05] Abberline: "Well, yes. It's required viewing for police officers."
[22:05] * Threnody laughs! "Along with Kindergarten Cop, I hope." :3
[22:06] Abberline: "...What? Ah, no, it's because the blokes who did Shaun of the Dead also did Hot Fuzz, which... they make us watch."
[22:08] Threnody: "...they /seriously/ make you watch it? Okay, the future really IS weird."
[22:09] Abberline: "Well, it's more of an initiation thing in boot camp." He chuckled.
[22:13] Threnody: "Boot camp. Jesus Christ. Remind me not to join the police force any time soon. ... you know, because that was likely to happen in the first place."
[22:14] Abberline: "I may look like a marshmallow Englisman but I can... er... I can sort of climb over a fence if I need to." TOUGH GUY.
[22:15] Threnody: "Do you spar ever?" Combat is an acceptable form of hanging out with someone, what.
[22:16] Abberline: "No, I haven't in ages. They only really require us to learn basic self defense. I'm more of an investigator than a field agent.. though whenever I end up getting injured I think, I've really got to get better at this, but I just end up putting it off."
[22:17] Threnody: "Could give you an update if you ever want to learn more."
[22:20] Abberline: "I have a feeling you'd outclass me by far."
[22:21] * Threnody griiins. "I'd take it easy on you."
[22:26] * Abberline raises an eyebrow slightly. "Is hand to hand combat a hobby of yours?"
[22:30] Threnody: "Sometimes. Back in the day, when I first met Elizabeth, she hired me as...a bodyguard. Of sorts." She rests her elbows on the tabletop.
[23:06] Abberline: "Sounds like a handy talent... werewolf apocolypses and all."
[23:08] * Threnody is a little bitterer when she laughs this time. "That was actually my first apocalypse, I think. I understand they can somehow repeat themselves, though."
[23:10] Abberline: "I've only been involved in one, and it turned out to be false advertisement." His voice is gentle, and he sets aside his fork.
[23:11] Threnody: "Yeah?" She raises her eyebrows. "... what happened?"
[23:12] Abberline: "Some unpleasant things. But everything was in a controlled universe, and those withing to bring the end of days were not.. native."
[23:13] * Threnody nods, slowly. "What happened to them?"
[23:13] Abberline: "They were permitted to stick around and terrorize the rest of us."
[23:17] Threnody: "... huh. We killed ours." She rests her chin in her hand. "Wasn't a controlled universe, though."
[23:17] Abberline: "Ah.. well.. in this place, if you died, the gods just ressurected you."
[23:18] Threnody: "... nice of them." She doesn't sound like she actually believes this.
[23:18] Threnody: By which we mean the 'niceness,' not that it happened.
[23:19] Abberline: "It was supposedly some experiment, taking people from their homes, torturing them, eliciting emotional responses and using the energy to fuel.. whatever it is they were fueling. We never found out. I don't think I made a very good battery, and they kicked me out." Obvs.
[23:22] * Threnody 's typist takes a moment to imagine how fucking badly that would go with Threnody o_o Anyway. "I see." She curls one leg underneath herself, sitting slouchily. "It was about energy--ours, too. Only...there was this thing. Under reality, kind of." She's trying to figure out how to phrase it.
[23:22] Abberline: /me's typist points out, this is why polychromatic is nuts. He listens to Threnody, his water glass in his hands.
[00:07] Threnody: "It turned Winnipeg--not a place known for its warm, sunny weather, by the way--into this...you couldn't be outside for longer than twenty minutes without freezing to death. There were these things like zombies, they'd touch you and suck the heat out of you. And under, this like--soft thing, a spirit, that was causing it all. It was huge. Like a planet under reality."
[00:08] * Threnody is STILL TALKING. "One of the witches from my world, not theirs, banned it. I don't trust her because of it; by all rights, we should be dead now. I blew it up, to distract it, and..." She shrugs. "The boy who caused it all, this 17-year-old punk kid sociopath, he's dead now."
[00:12] * Abberline is quiet, because there's not much to say to anything like that, no matter how many horrible stories one hears - there's never anything great to counter it with. "...People need to get over trying to end the world."
[00:14] * Threnody kind of retells it like she's fascinated, rather than horrified, which ... is a flaw, Threnody. "They really fucking do. I'm going to hate Canada forever." >:\
[00:15] Abberline: "...You know, we pretend to like Canada in England, but in reality it's our embarassing uncool little brother. We just pretend to like Canada because of America."
[00:16] * Threnody ... lols really hard at that. "Because it's moderately less politically fucked in the head than America, or?"
[00:17] Abberline: "Because we're really contrary and don't like America, but we don't want to be like France and be too blatant about it. So we just sit here and are very mild and useless. It's how we protest, goddamnit."
[00:19] Threnody: "In that case while I'm over here, should I like...throw your tea into a pond or something? Because I'm probably gonna have to head home soon, 'less I want to get kicked off the property permanently."
[00:25] * Abberline chuckles lightly. "I like my tea where it is. But if you need to get going, I'll not hold you hostage in this dreary place."
[00:28] * Threnody rises, slow, stretching again--she's felt kinda cold since leaving Winnipeg. "Hey, better'n where I live, at least you've got furniture." ... they still have crates. Instead of furniture. >_> "I'll see you around?"
[00:29] * Abberline stands up, as he is a bit of a gentleman at heart. "It's entirely possible."
[00:32] Threnody: "Yeah, that, or it's going to be completely awkward and we'll ignore each other forever. But hopefully not that." :D ... sometimes there is such a thing as 'too blunt,' T. She stops in front of him, thoughtfully, and sort of knocks her hand against his shoulder. This is affectionate, despite...being incredibly boyish of her. "Thanks."
[00:33] Abberline: "You're welcome." He just gives her a little smile, because that's how he rolls.
[00:33] * Threnody goes! She'll find her way back to the Nexus somehow.