Switch-Hitting Part 6
17. Pulp--This is Hardcore
After they get back, April flies by faster than they realize, there and gone in a whirl of trying to adjust to new schedules. Jin has a fresh timetable of classes and professors to get used to, whereas Kazuya fights to get his body to adapt to his new team's pitching rotation and conditioning schedule. Although their obligations often keep them busy, they're still very much a couple, and even if they don't have a lot of time to spend together, they try to find ways to honor that. For one thing, Jin starts coming to Kazuya's games. Granted, he only goes on days when he doesn't have class at the same time, the weather's not too bad, and Kazuya's actually pitching (as opposed to sitting in the dugout in his windbreaker, visibly chomping on a thick wad of gum as he watches the game progress through trained, intensive eyes, which his position on the team means he does by default 80% of the time). As a result, Jin makes it to at most two games out of the whole month, but he goes willingly, which is more than Kazuya thinks he could have asked for.
Nevertheless, Kazuya doesn't fully realize just how quickly time has passed until the family gathers around the table for dinner one night towards the end of the month, and his parents ask Jin what he's been doing in his free time lately. Since they've become friends and later more than that, Kazuya likes to amuse himself by mentally answering the question for Jin, as they've been spending so much time together that it's no challenge for him to recount the events of Jin's day. His stomach lurches a little, though, when he realizes that as of the last few weeks, he has little to no idea what Jin's been up to. Between practice and games, he simply hasn't been around, and apart from Jin coming to watch him pitch once or twice, they haven't done anything alone together since they went to Kyushu. Hoping tea will settle his suddenly nervous stomach, Kazuya raises his cup to take a sip while he and everyone else at the table await Jin's response.
“Well, a few weekends ago, there was that penis festival in Kawasaki. I went to that.”
Kazuya promptly chokes on his tea. While he turns away from the table and coughs hard to clear the liquid from his lungs, Yuya's hand helpfully smacking between his shoulderblades, his parents start with surprise.
“You went all the way to Kawasaki?” his mother asks.
Jin just blinks at her, his voice considerably less confident after witnessing everyone's reaction. “It wasn't that far...Kazuya, are you okay?”
“Fine,” he rasps, intent on ignoring the rest of the conversation as he reaches for his bowl of miso soup and takes a careful sip, hoping to soothe the slight burn the tea left behind in his throat.
Always a man of few words, Kazuya's father just looks at Jin and asks, “Why?”
Why indeed, Kazuya would like to know. He thinks of that particular Shinto festival's religious significance, as well as how it's come to be celebrated, and he can't help but wonder if Jin is trying to tell him something. He can feel that his face is still flushed bright red, even though he's long since recovered from his coughing fit. He doesn't think he's reading too far into it when he sees the grin that comes over Jin's face, but when he hears his answer, he thinks that if Jin is trying to convey some subliminal sexual message about their relationship to him, he might be going about it a bit too subtly for it to get across.
“Actually, my friends at home said they'd hate me forever if I came back from Japan without pictures of the penis festival. In fact, I'll show you.” With that, he gets up from the table and hurries upstairs, presumably to fetch his camera.
Yeah, Kazuya really has no idea where Jin's going with this.
His mother chooses that moment to look at him, and a worried frown paints subtle lines over her face. “Kazuya, are you sure you're all right? You look flushed.”
“I'm fine,” he says again, just as Jin comes back downstairs, and morbid curiosity forces Kazuya to join his family in gathering around him when he retakes his seat. He cranes his neck to see the various pictures captured in Jin's digital camera of a portable shrine featuring a large pink phallus.
As Jin scrolls through the pictures, Kazuya's mother asks, “So what did you think of it?”
Jin's finger hovers over the button as he turns to answer, preserving on the screen an image of three teenage Japanese girls, their fingers raised in the universal 'v' sign while they suck on what are most definitely penis-shaped lollipops. “It was...interesting. I understood that it's to celebrate fertility, but I wasn't expecting to see people carving vegetables into...that shape and then auctioning them off! I couldn't help but watch for a while, and the guys doing it were all really nice. One of them let me try my hand at carving an eggplant, and I think it turned out pretty well, even though I've never done anything like that before. To be honest, there wasn't much to do. It kind of looks like that anyway, so... yeah. Anyway, after I carved it, I bought it off the guy for 500 yen and he deep-fried it for me.” He starts going through the pictures again; the very next ones are of him with his carving: first pre-frying, then post-frying, and finally half sticking out of his mouth.
While his parents laugh, Kazuya sees the look in Yuya's eyes that means he has a dirty joke on the tip of his tongue, and he decides it best to remove himself from the conversation. Wordlessly, he starts gathering some of the empty dishes and disappears into the kitchen.
Setting the dishes aside, he lowers his head and squeezes the edge of the countertop until his knuckles go white, trying to make sense of what just happened. Since they've gotten back from Kyushu, he's struggled to deal with the realization he'd made in the darkness of their hotel room. He's certainly seeing Jin in a new light. In addition to the vivid dreams that keep coming to him, he can't help but wonder how Jin feels about all of this-if Jin's ever dreamt about him like that, where the mere memory of it makes his toes curl, or if he's ever laid awake at night wanting to reach over and touch him awake, too. A shiver races through his body, and heat floods his cheeks as he feels the first hints of arousal gathering in the lowest part of his belly at the thought. Previous conversations with Jin have led him to believe the other wouldn't have anything to say against taking their relationship a step further, which makes Kazuya wonder if maybe Jin's been struggling with it this whole time, not wanting to wait anymore, and he just hasn't noticed. It gives him a lot to think about, and Jin's little story in the other room had certainly been of no help, whatever the intent behind it had been.
After a few deep breaths to calm down, he starts filling the sink with soapy water, but he keeps one ear tilted in the direction of the table so he can listen in on the rest of the conversation, trying to determine when it might be safe for him to rejoin them. He doesn't imagine he'll have to wait long, as there are only so many things that can be said about penises at the family dinner table, and he's right. He's only just finished scraping the leftover food out of the bowls and dropping them in the suds to soak when he hears his father say to Jin, “Ah, but you shouldn't have to sight-see on your own. Golden Week is coming up soon-how about we all go somewhere together? You've never been to Kansai, right? We could spend a few days in Kyoto or Osaka.”
“Ah, good idea!” he hears his mother's voice echo.
Kazuya dries his soapy hands on the seat of his pants and hurries back to the doorway. “What's this about a trip?” He feigns ignorance, but really he's heard every word, and if he's frowning, it's at the thought of having to stay somewhere with his family where he and Jin might not have a place just the two of them can escape to, rather than the excuse he gives after his father reiterates the suggestion, which is that the baseball league he's a part of now isn't planning on observing the Golden Week holidays. It's not a lie, and it's also true that he wouldn't want to go if that were the only concern weighing on his mind, but up against how he realizes he's started to feel about Jin, it's not the most worrying one. It's such a recent discovery that he's not entirely sure of all the ways it might manifest itself yet, and he doesn't want to step that far outside of his comfort zone if he doesn't know.
For that reason, he can't help but feel a bit relieved when his father says, “Ah, too bad,” clapping him on the shoulder and following up with, “It stinks being an adult, doesn't it?”
Kazuya would point out that he's not an adult yet, but he realizes he's certainly getting close if he has to go to “work” on the week-long string of holidays that even his salaryman father gets to have off every year. “Yeah...sorry,” he says, and he means it when he thinks that his grueling baseball schedule might be what keeps Jin from seeing more of Japan before he has to go home.
His mother, though, waves that concern away. “That's all right. We'll think of something else we can do.”
That 'something else' turns out to be a series of day-trips to all of the major cities and tourist spots in the Kanto area, none of which Kazuya can go on because he has practice or a game every day. As much as he loves the sport, it kills him to hear them all talk about what they want to see and do in each Yokohama, Kamakura, Chiba, and Nara, knowing he won't be going with them. It sucks even more when his parents lay down rules for when he's home alone, as if he's nine instead of nineteen. He's just grateful they spare him the embarrassment of being lectured in front of Jin-that would have been mortifying, especially considering his parents have no idea why he would have felt that way, and he has no intention of filling them in. When he finds a list of emergency numbers and money for the conbini laid out beside the phone, Kazuya thinks that for the first time in his life, he's seriously dreading the arrival of Golden Week.
When the last week of April becomes the first week of May, Kazuya thinks it's going just about as badly as he feared it would. Maybe it's his attitude and how he's approaching the situation more than anything his family's doing, but it still hurts like hell when they “entertain” him with stories of things that happened to them over the course of the day and show him all the pictures they've taken.
It goes without saying that the ones that annoy him the most are the ones that feature Jin in some way, which, of course, are most of them-Jin almost breaking his teeth on roasted chestnuts as he watches street performers juggle fire in Yokohama, showing the camera the exact same silly pose in front of the large Buddha statues in both Kamakura and Nara, getting chased by a deer in Nara, smiling with all the glee of a five-year-old as he takes in the sights of Tokyo Disneyland...
It feels like there are hundreds of them, and the fact that he's not in any of them, that he's not there to share in those happy memories, drives Kazuya crazy. It puts him in a foul mood for the rest of the week, a swirl of negative emotions in his stomach turning into a whirlpool at the thought of the rest of the family having fun without him. He knows it's not their fault he can't go with them, and they've by no means suggested that they wouldn't want him there, but it still hurts in a way Kazuya isn't sure he completely understands when he thinks about his parents or Yuya making Jin's face light up with laughter or wrapping an arm around his shoulders as they pose for a picture together.
Kazuya doesn't realize until after the fact that, apart from jealousy, part of the sick, nasty, angry feeling he's dealing with is possessiveness. It takes him completely by surprise when he's able to give name to it--that urge to keep Jin's attention on him as long as possible and feeling sick when something prevents him from doing so, as he's never experienced anything quite like that before. It's a realization that comes to him as he's laying in his futon staring up at the stars on the ceiling, having turned in early while his family was still looking through pictures. Laying there in the darkness, little half-formed thoughts flicker in and out of his mind, all of them centering around Jin and how his feelings have changed since he realized he was falling in love with him. It's more complicated than he ever thought it would be. In addition to all of the wonderful things he felt at that moment in Kyushu when he'd first realized it, now there's also anger, jealousy, that dreaded possessiveness, pain, anxiety, and fear. The idea that he can feel so many different things at once by thinking of a single person is overwhelming, and it petrifies him to think that he might not be able to handle it all on his own.
A few minutes later, he sees the beam of light seeping into the room from the hallway widen, announcing Jin's entrance, and he quickly turns on his side to face the wall, not trusting himself to say anything to Jin so soon after realizing what he has about himself.
It's rather hard not to, though, when Jin lays down beside him and wraps an arm around his shoulders, murmuring quietly into the space between his ear and the nape of his neck to try and engage him in conversation. “Hey...are you okay?”
All of those negative emotions Kazuya's been feeling start to bubble in his chest, making him want to lash out for unknown reasons, and his previous thought process doesn't do much to help keep his tongue in check. “What do you think?”
Jin reacts in the way he expects, which is not very well. Kazuya feels him tense slightly at his side, and his tone is more clipped than usual when he says, “You've been acting weird. What gives?”
In response to Jin's question, Kazuya's feelings start to get the better of him, and he turns around, not settling for simply switching to his other side to face Jin, instead rolling until he's half laying on top of him, their faces suddenly pressed close together in the darkness. “What gives is that I'll be really happy when this stupid week is over so my parents will stop dragging you around everywhere. It sucks coming home to an empty house every day, knowing you guys are off somewhere having fun without me.”
Kazuya knows the words that come out of his mouth in no way accurately reflect everything he's been thinking about for the last several days, and Jin's corresponding lack of comprehension reflects in how frown lines briefly appear on his forehead when his brow furrows. Instead of clarifying what he means by just telling Jin he's missed him and wants to spend time with him so he doesn't have to feel alone anymore, he seeks out Jin's lips with his own, unfamiliar, but powerful feelings spurring him on to clutch tightly at Jin's shoulders and press hard against his mouth. Jin's lips part with a surprised gasp, but the way his arms lock tightly around Kazuya's back says he's not at all opposed to Kazuya kissing him like that. Electricity shoots through Kazuya's veins at the feeling of Jin's tongue slipping out to swirl with his own, and he can't hold back the groan that slips out, which Jin eagerly swallows down.
Kazuya squirms helplessly against him even though he rolls until he's the one on top, feeling his body wake up faster than it ever has before as they continue to kiss, and he gets an answer regarding how Jin feels about him when he realizes the other is in a similar state. When they pull back for air, Kazuya feels what had been anger and frustration fade into something more...instinctual. Apart from feeling Jin's reaction making him curious and filling him with the want to explore, he feels pleasantly warm all of a sudden, and it feels as though all of his feelings are ghosting out along with his breath as he breathes hard against Jin's lips. Something in the back of his mind tells him that kissing Jin again might be a good way to share those feelings with him, and he can't resist the pull coming from deep inside him that draws him down to do just that.
Having Jin's hands and mouth on him has to be the most incredible thing he's ever felt. The way Jin's lips and fingers ghost over him speaks of his prior experience, and Kazuya's quite a bit messier in his attempts to reciprocate the attention, but Jin doesn't seem to mind, if the way he leans into every touch and has to fight to hold back sounds of pleasure is any indication. It gets harder and harder for both of them to keep such sounds at bay as they continue to get more acquainted with each other, and it's only when Kazuya whimpers at the feeling of Jin's lips working over his neck, careful not to leave a mark, that their momentum falters. Kazuya looks dazedly at Jin through pleasure-darkened eyes when he pulls away, ready to demand to know why he stopped, but the pad of the other's index finger pressing firmly to his lips sobers him a bit, reminding him of the reality of the situation and making him realize it's probably better if they don't let things get carried away.
Except it's not that easy. “Jin,” he breathes, his voice quieter than it had been, but otherwise not much more controlled. He buries his face in Jin's shoulder to muffle the noises he can't keep from slipping out as he moves purposefully against him. The way the other's breath hitches lets him know Jin knows what he needs, and that he needs the same in return. After Jin murmurs a question and Kazuya nods his assent, they shift a little against each other, and they both try to keep as quiet as possible as one of Jin's hands disappears beneath the bedcovers.
Afterward, they keep holding each other close, breathing heavily against each other's lips as they share a few slow, lazy kisses. Kazuya's heart thrums with excitement in his chest, and he lets out a deep sigh that helps to uncoil the tight knot of feelings he holds for the man laying beside him. He hears what sounds like a chuckle, but when he looks at Jin, he sees so much more than simple amusement in his eyes. There's a deep-seated contentment there that Kazuya almost can't believe is because of him until Jin reaches forward to draw the tips of his fingers down the side of his face, a simple movement that makes Kazuya's breath hitch and his heart race. Once again, he feels like he can't contain his feelings inside of him, and he pulls Jin into another gentle kiss.
Except Jin surprises him by pulling back what he feels is a moment too early. Kazuya stares at him, bewildered, when he feels the hesitance in his body language, and the happy, floaty feeling he's been experiencing settles into something more sober when he sees the solemn look Jin's suddenly giving him. “What was that all about?” he asks, his thumb never ceasing its gentle back-and-forth strokes across his cheekbone.
Kazuya's breath catches and his heart jumps to his throat, feeling like he's being put on the spot. What had all of that been about? Deep down, he knows the answer-a potent blend of negative emotions had made him feel that way, desperately seeking out a connection with Jin to satisfy a need to be close to him after feeling like they'd spent weeks apart. Except trying to put that into words is...
Jin shifts uncomfortably against him when Kazuya lowers his gaze. “Was that really okay?” His question is by far more insistent than the first, and it's clear he's interpreted Kazuya's silence to mean something bad.
Kazuya's quick to correct him. “N-No, I...I mean yes, it was okay. I just...” He trails off when he looks into Jin's eyes, and he calms slightly when he sees the deep emotion swirling in there, all of it being radiated towards him. He wonders then if maybe Jin feels the same way about him, and he thinks that if he does, he deserves a bit of honesty. “I guess I just missed you,” he says finally, and he snuggles closer, filling the small amount of space left between their tangled bodies. It feels like a slightly larger risk when he follows up with, “It sucks being away from you,” hinting at the complex tangle of emotions he's been dealing with since his parents decided on the itinerary for Golden Week, and relief washes over him when Jin wraps his arms a bit more tightly around him, pressing a kiss to his hair and saying, “I know what you mean.”
Kazuya can't help but smile widely when he tilts his head back a little and their gazes lock again, both sets of brown eyes warm and happy in the quiet darkness. It's no mystery to either of them that their feelings for each other are growing, and it makes Kazuya anxious in a way he's never felt before. Fingers entwined with Jin's beneath the covers, Kazuya kisses him one more time before settling down for sleep, the content smile never fading from his lips. Laying there with Jin, feeling closer to him than ever before, he can't wait to see what the next day has in store for the both of them.
~*~*~*~
18. SMAP--Sotto Kyutto
May passes no less quickly than April had, as Jin and Kazuya's schedules remain more or less unchanged, but the next few weeks are much more enjoyable than the whole previous month had been, for a number of reasons. At the same time as the first hints of summer try to make their presence known among the waning days of late spring, it feels as though the relationship between the two boys is going into full-bloom. Despite how busy they both are, they go out of their way to spend as much time together as possible, whether that means meeting for a late dinner after Kazuya's done with baseball for the day or making plans to go to an amusement park or karaoke on a rare day off. Apart from that, with the weather turning nicer, Jin makes it to more of Kazuya's games, and sometimes he actually tries to follow what's going on on the field instead of hunching over his homework balanced on his knees or staring up at the sky looking bored. If, once or twice, he accidentally cheers for the wrong team, Kazuya thinks he can forgive him.
As happy as he is to have Jin's (albeit lackluster) support, the time Kazuya most enjoys spending with Jin is when they go for meals together. On a student budget, that typically means hitting the nearest conbini and enjoying their preheated meals beneath the bridge at the riverside. Although their idea of a date might lack the finesse of dining at a full-service restaurant, Kazuya can't think of a better way to spend an evening than basking in the calm of a warm spring night, slurping away at cup noodles with Jin. Hidden away in the shadows, they can talk for hours about nothing and smile against each other's mouths, tasting salty broth on their tongues. Sometimes they lay out in the grass looking up at the few stars visible in the Tokyo sky or stroll up and down the path that runs alongside the river until curfew dictates they go back. Even then they dawdle, zig-zagging their way back to the house on the meandering footpaths nestled between the houses, secluded enough to make them feel alone in a city of over fifteen million people.
If Kazuya's parents suspect anything about the nature of their son's evenings out with Jin, they never let on, instead just smiling after them when they head upstairs for bed in that way that Kazuya thinks means they're happy he and his “host brother” have become “best friends”. After a while, he starts to find it really funny that they know nothing of what goes on behind the closed door of his and Jin's shared bedroom. On most nights, the moment they turn the lock (or sometimes before that, making eyes at each other in the bathroom mirror as they brush their teeth or “accidentally” brushing against each other when they need to reach for something on the other side of the sink), the atmosphere in the room pulses with a certain type of energy-one of teenage anxiousness, curiosity, and desire.
As though that first glorious night at the tail end of Golden Week released some sort of floodgate, they spend many more like it burrowed beneath the covers of a single futon to get better acquainted with each other. Quiet sighs escape as curious hands ghost over regions previously unexplored. Moving against Jin, feeling their breath mingling and the temperature rising under the blankets makes Kazuya lightheaded and giddy, and he sometimes can't help it when his body seems to cry out for more. As the nights go on, their activities grow bolder, more daring, and the current of electricity that seems to run between them only grows stronger.
A couple of times, they pull away long enough to stare at each other in the darkness, bodies thrumming with arousal and unspoken questions in their eyes or on their kiss-swollen lips. Kazuya's pulse fires like a machine gun and blood rushes in his ears when that happens. He has a feeling Jin can read his answer in his eyes, but he can't seem to say the words. As much as he knows he wants Jin and has since Kyushu, fighting past the nerves and giving voice to his desires turns out to be something else entirely. A few days of mental pep-talks and practicing saying the words help make him feel ready, but on the night he chooses to tell Jin, at the exact moment he opens his mouth, Yuya's heavy footsteps thunder up the stairs just outside the room as he runs down the hallway.
Kazuya clamps his mouth shut again and swallows hard. His heart skips a whole round of beats in his chest. With a sinking feeling of realization settling in the pit of his stomach, it becomes clear to him that he and Jin can only take their relationship so far under his parents' roof. He rolls towards Jin then and presses a gentle kiss to his lips, as though in apology. Jin just murmurs, “It's all right,” against his lips and holds him a bit closer to take care of both of them.
It's a gesture that's rapidly becoming familiar, except that now they're both starting to feel like it's not enough.
~*~*~*~
June brings with it the beginning of the rainy season, which in Japan means the skies open up and don't let up for a single moment for days on end. It wreaks havoc on Kazuya's baseball schedule. As the month goes on and the summer heat and humidity get more deeply entrenched in the stormy air, heavy rain washes out more and more of his team's games. The first time a day-long downpour means he has to miss a start, he grows ornery, and the usually overworked muscles in his throwing arm start to get stiff from lack of use. Jin offers to massage the soreness away, but they find out halfway through the treatment that the complicated network of muscle, bone, and nerves in Kazuya's back and shoulders is a major erogenous zone, and Jin has to stop when the groans that leave Kazuya's mouth start to stem more from pleasure than relief. Kazuya's mood does not improve.
The next time Kazuya's turn in the pitching rotation comes around, the day dawns promising, with crisp, clean air that doesn't choke them when they breathe it in and, they can hardly believe it, actual sunshine. Even though the game won't start until after lunchtime, Kazuya's up and dressed by the time Jin has to drag himself out of his futon to go to class, and Kazuya spends an extra long time kissing him awake before they both have to descend for breakfast. Heading briefly back upstairs for his bag (and equally enthusiastic goodbye kisses), Jin wishes Kazuya good luck at the game, and the brightness of Kazuya's smile rivals that of the sunlight streaming through the windows.
Except by the time the game's due to start, the air's turned thick and heavy again, and two hours later, the spectators flee their seats in the stadium for the nearest subway station to escape yet another round of what feels like the wrath of the gods in cold droplet form.
All of the trains get delayed, and it takes Jin nearly twice as long to get home after classes get out than normal. When he finally makes it back to the house, his shoes, the bottoms of his jeans, and his bookbag are all soaked, and his weary call of, “I'm home,” as he shakes out his (useless) umbrella goes unanswered. Thinking himself home alone, he starts peeling his clothes off on the way upstairs, intent on taking a hot bath to ward off the chill he already feels seeping beneath his skin. All thoughts of a bath leave him, though, when he enters the bedroom to find Kazuya sitting cross-legged on his futon, looking equally damp and twice as disgruntled, ice packs wrapped securely around his right shoulder with what appears to be yards of tape.
Having not expected him to be home so early, Jin can only look at him for a moment before cautiously asking, “How was the game?”
When his eyes fall closed, Kazuya looks the perfect image of Zen meditation, but the frown etched on his face suggests he's far from inner peace. “Other team was up one after five when the rain started, so they called it.” He has to clarify, “We lost,” when Jin doesn't seem to have a clue what he's talking about.
“Oh,” the other says, dropping his wet clothes and changing into some dry ones so he can join Kazuya on the futon, sitting at his side. “Sorry to hear that.” He makes to wrap an arm around Kazuya's shoulders, but the touch of ice to his skin when he tries makes him flinch away.
“Stupid rain,” Kazuya says.
Jin tries again, this time encircling his arm around Kazuya's skinny waist, and he pulls gently until Kazuya gets the hint to rest his head on his shoulder. “You did your best, though. And your arm got some exercise, which is a good thing, right?”
Kazuya lets out a sigh once he gets comfortable. “Yeah, that's true. It sucks, though. We could have won.”
Pressing a kiss to the spot just behind Kazuya's ear, Jin's voice comes out a little muffled as he says, “Next time. You'll kick their asses next time.”
He rubs his thumb over the sharp point of Kazuya's hipbone, and Kazuya squirms at the sudden attention, turning in Jin's embrace to give him a kiss. “Damn straight.”
Kazuya stays close enough after the kiss for their lips to brush when he speaks, which gives Jin the opportunity to kiss him again. He does so, playfully, tasting the small smile appearing on his lips. Kazuya does the same, cupping Jin's cheek to pull him closer and flicking his tongue out just enough to get Jin to-yes, just like that-gasp against his lips. He shifts a little, turning and straddling one of Jin's legs so he can kiss him full-on. His lips part in clear invitation, and Jin wastes no time in accepting, seeking out Kazuya's tongue with his own and delighting in the pleasant shiver that racks Kazuya's small frame as a result of them moving together. Kazuya pushes forward with his whole body as he kisses back, all raw enthusiasm and excitement, and Jin lowers his hands to the small of Kazuya's back to hold him steady there. Kazuya doesn't seem to be aware of the fact that his knee has ended up between Jin's thighs, but Jin thinks he will be shortly if he keeps kissing him like that (which is to say, very well).
A quiet sigh escapes Kazuya's lips as they continue, the intricate dance of their mouths coming together over and over, making tendrils of pleasant warmth spread throughout his body, encouraging him to keep going. He can only assume that Jin feels the same when moist lips pull away from his own to trail first up his jaw and then down his neck. His head tilts back automatically at the first touch of Jin's lips to the sensitive skin at the base of his throat, and he feels the craving that's grown familiar since they've started being intimate like this. He wants to feel Jin part his lips against that spot and work his mouth over it long enough to leave a mark behind. He knows Jin won't, because the circumstances under which they're together won't allow him to, but a tremble runs the length of his body at the thought anyway, and he wraps his arms around Jin's neck, trying to encourage him.
Except that instead of giving him what he wants, Jin flinches suddenly and pulls away, something that sounds very much like an English swear word on his lips. Somewhat stunned, Kazuya opens his eyes, and he realizes what happened when he sees how close his ice packs have gotten to Jin's neck. “Oops,” he says sheepishly, and Jin glares at him, but without any heat.
“Do you have to keep that on?” he asks a moment later, fingering one of the ends of tape that had come loose and looking at the rest of the wrapping as though undoing every single wind around Kazuya's arm would win him some sort of prize.
Kazuya shivers again when he realizes exactly what that prize would be. “No,” he says, already turning his body to find a good spot from which to start unwrapping. “My arm's fine. It can come off.” As he moves his arm so Jin can better help him, a sneaky little thought slithers into his brain: that's not the only thing that can come off.
Even with the two of them working on it, it takes several minutes to undo the elaborate web of tape and ice around Kazuya's shoulder, but the moment they manage it, Jin's warm hand presses to Kazuya's newly-exposed, chilled skin, coaxing a groan from the younger's throat at the pleasant change in temperature. They draw closer again, without the annoying wrappings in the way, and in an instant, the atmosphere changes. Perhaps because of the rain outside, or because of their proximity, the summer air grows thick and oppressive, and they suddenly become aware of the heat coiling between their bodies. The sound of the raindrops drumming on the roof is deafening, especially compared to the silence that permeates throughout the rest of the house. They sit with their foreheads pressed together for a long moment, both wanting, but afraid to break the silence.
Even though he's the one to initiate the contact, Kazuya still groans when his and Jin's lips brush again. It hardly counts as a kiss, but it's charged with intent, electrifying Kazuya's every nerve and making him moan long and loud into Jin's mouth when the other tilts his head slightly, parting his lips to deepen it.
They continue like that for a while, hands and mouths exploring together, playing off the incredible reactions each touch brings each other until Kazuya lays down and he pulls Jin down on top of him. Curious hands get more daring, and it becomes clear before long that neither has any desire to stop. Just to be sure, Jin pulls back a little to make sure this is what Kazuya wants, but he can't even get the question out before Kazuya's arching underneath him, assuring him yes.
Jin lowers himself back down, pressing his body flush against Kazuya's and tangling their fingers together above Kazuya's head as he kisses him slowly, intimately. They're both panting hard when they break apart, but Jin manages to focus through the pleasant haze that's fallen over his brain long enough to ask Kazuya if he's prepared, and the other flicks his gaze in the direction of the dresser before trying to pull him down again.
Kazuya whines a little when Jin refuses to follow, looking a bit too surprised for comfort considering the situation, and a deep blush spreads across Kazuya's cheeks when Jin asks, “How long have they been there?”
“Since we got back from Kyushu,” he admits, and his hands come up to hide his face when, for a moment, Jin just looks at him, his expression surprised, pleased, and yet soft in a way Kazuya doesn't think he's ever seen before, as if Jin's simultaneously putting his own soul on display and trying to catch a glimpse of Kazuya's. The tone of his voice when he speaks also isn't something he's heard before.
“Kazuya, do you love me?”
All the air seems to leave Kazuya's lungs in a rush, and his stomach rolls hard with fear, but when he sees the open, vulnerable, hoping look in Jin's eyes, he knows it won't do either of them any good if he tries to hide his feelings. “Y-Yes, Jin, I love you.” After a slight pause, he adds, “Also since we got back from Kyushu,” in an attempt to lighten the mood.
It works. A peal of light, relieved laughter escapes Jin's throat, and he leans over Kazuya to kiss him again. “Good, because I love you, too.”
After that, Kazuya only lets Jin out of his arms long enough to open and close the dresser drawer, pulling him into a tight embrace again as Jin re-joins him and slowly lowers him down.
What goes unsaid is, as happy as they are, a bittersweetness will soon settle in, gripping as tightly as the heat does on the long, sticky days of summer.
Part 7