From the 2003 edition of the Encyclopaedia Britannica:

The artichoke is native to the western and central Mediterranean, whence it was carried to the eastern Mediterranean in ancient times. At that time the young leaves rather than the immature flower heads were eaten; the edible-flower form was first recorded in Italy about 1400. Today it is ( Read more... )

...but this is funny, so fuck off.


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Every now and again, I feel the compulsion to do my civic duty and educate the public in the methods and discoveries of my chosen discipline, Science; to provide material here on your pages, Agnes, which will serve to edify your readers on a subject more immediately pertinent than my own eccentric and unpredictable internal states. Unfortunately, ( Read more... )

Fuck it, Agnes! I'm tired! I'm bored! I'm angry! I'm horny! Fuck it, Agnes, let's get our shit into gear and move! Let's make tomorrow - which is already today - our everlovin' oyster soup and moooove! Let's get the day wasted, and you know which sense I mean. Agnes, we've a-gotta blow somebody's fuses and if we step onna crack and break our poor ( Read more... )

Last night I dreamt that I was watching a strange theater troupe perform an even stranger series of quasi-interactive plays. Greg, Joseph, and Zack were there, as well as a couple of other people from IIT whom I've seen around but don' really know the names of. The dream is rather blurry in my head, but I know that a railroad car was involved at ( Read more... )

Last night I dreamt of an expedition to Greenland. The expedition occurred sometime between the years 1865 and 1935; as will be seen, the chronology is rendered horribly imprecise by certain internal contradictions and anachronisms within the dream. The expedition was being organized by an American gentleman, an adventurous type who had been ( Read more... )

By the way, darling Agnes, it seems that another pair of eyes has managed to stumble upon your delicate pages, those lovely things made of naught but corruscating patterns of electricity flitting back and forth across the wires and fibres of modern civilization, and has flipped his way through them. You need not be disconcerted or put out-of-sorts ( Read more... )

Saturday night I dreamt that I was taking a shower. I was not taking it in some ordinary shower stall, but rather in an irregularly shaped room about twenty feet in length and ten feet in width. It had small, pale blue tiles lining its floors and similarly sized white tiles lining its walls and ceiling. Somehow the showerhead was able to send water ( Read more... )

Once upon a time, somebody told me to get a life. So I bought a pet emu.

A kingpin in the exotic pet trade since 1986,
--mark

Last night I dreamt about a bordello. It involved an old, rich client of the bordello who was, for some reason, extremely repulsive. I say 'for some reason' because I don't recall him being physically unappealing - in fact, in my memory he's quite handsome looking for an elderly gentleman. But my memory is kind of fuzzy, and he was repulsive ( Read more... )