Xmas fic: Brendon/Joe for makesomelove
I wasn’t going to post this until tomorrow, so as not to spam you guys with fic more than once a day, but Bran said posting at midnight here counted and so here is another of the xmas ficlets that ran away from me.
makesomelove wanted Brendon/Joe influenced by the last good movie I saw, which happened to be Role Models. So here is a story about Brendon and Joe being role playing nerds, Joe keeping it secret, and everyone in their high school learning something important. Imagine Captain Planet or Heman or some other cartoon character popping up at the end to impart the lesson to you, okay? DON’T LITTER. SHARING IS CARING. YOU TOO HAVE THE POWER.
(Title from Role Models, character names stolen from that Guess-The-Names game FOB posted on FOE)
I Bet If I Suggested A Game Of Quidditch He’d Come In His Pants (Brendon/Joe)
One day Brendon was in the park. He was hiding behind a tree because he was almost out of stored magic, which meant he was vulnerable to attacks. Also, one of his wings was ripped and he needed to fix it when he got home. Maybe after dinner- tonight was spaghetti and meatballs and he didn’t want to be late for that.
The forest was quiet. For a moment Brendon worried that everyone had gone home and left him, but then he realised that it was too quiet. Something was wrong.
The back of his neck prickled like he was being watched and he turned around, just in time to avoid the sword that swung towards him and rebounded off the tree.
“Fuck,” said the knight, stumbling a little.
The knight swung his sword again, hitting Brendon on one leg, then the other, and Brendon fell to his knees. He clutched his sword tighter and struck out wildly, trying to defend himself, desperately looking for help.
The knight’s sword hit him in the arm, and he dropped his own sword to the ground. He dredged up his last bit of magic just as the knight’s sword hit his other arm. As he toppled over, Brendon muttered a spell that cast a temporary, weak shield around him.
“Well, that was pointless,” the knight said, sinking to the ground just outside the range of Brendon’s shield to wait out the five minutes it would take to fade.
Brendon rolled over so he could see the knight. “I had to do something to stop you killing me!” he exclaimed and the knight shrugged.
“It’s not going to stop it. Just postponing the inevitable.”
Brendon scowled at him, but the knight just shrugged and stretched out his legs, resting his sword across his lap.
“What’s your name, kid?”
Brendon glared at him for a long moment before sighing. “Canary,” he said.
The knight raised an eyebrow at him. “Canary? How come you have butterfly wings then? Shouldn’t you have, like, feathers or something?”
“They’re fairy wings!” Brendon snapped defensively.
The knight smirked. “A fairy called Canary?”
He laughed and Brendon wished he could fold his arms because it added so much more to the glare.
“Well, Canary,” the knight said, glancing at his watch. “Consider me your coalmine. Your time’s almost up. Prepare to die.”
“Who are you?” Brendon asked, stalling for time, still desperately hoping that someone would come by and rescue him. “I mean, I’ve not seen you around before.”
The knight grinned. “You,” he said, “can call me the Rose Vest Superman.”
He pointed at the vest he wore, adorned with several red roses. “I get one for each kill I make. You’re going to make it an even dozen.”
“Oh,” Brendon said, as his shield vanished. “Fine. I hope it’s a pretty rose then.”
The knight got to his feet and raised his sword over Brendon.
“Ready?” he asked and Brendon sighed.
“Sure,” he said, pouting. “I always die. I’m used to it by now.”
The knight started to let the sword fall. Brendon closed his eyes, wincing, waiting for the death blow to fall. But it never came.
Cautiously, he opened his eyes. The sword had stopped a few inches from his chest.
“Come on,” the knight said, sheathing his sword and offering a hand to Brendon. “We’ll tell them it was a draw.”
Brendon took the hand and let the knight pull him to his feet. “Why didn’t you kill me?”
The knight shrugged. “The vest’s getting crowded. Don’t really need another rose right now.”
“Oh,” Brendon said, dusting himself down. He checked his wing again, which was even more broken now that he’d been rolling around on the ground, and made a face.
“Can you fix it?” the knight asked and Brendon nodded.
“Oh, definitely,” he said, as they started to walk back towards the parking lot. “I’m good at making costumes.”
The knight looked Brendon up and down, taking in his bright yellow jerkin and tights. His shiny black boots and pointy ears.
“I can see that,” he said.
Brendon surveyed the knight too. Other than the fancy vest, his outfit was plain and boring, like he’d bought bits and pieces and tried to make a costume but hadn’t done a very good job of it.
“If you’re a knight,” Brendon asked, “how come you don’t wear a helmet?”
“I can’t find one that’ll fit over my hair,” the knight said, shaking his head so that his awesome curls flew everywhere as illustration.
“That’s a shame,” Brendon told him. “You know, I could probably help you out with that.”
The knight laughed and clapped him on the shoulder. “Don’t trouble yourself kid. Hey, I have to get going. See you around, yeah?”
He jogged off towards the parking lot, which had just come into view through the trees. Brendon kept walking slowly, greeting fellow warriors who were returning from their games. He watched as the knight got into a rusty old blue car and drove away.
Brendon thought about him a lot as he sat on the sidewalk and waited for his mom to come and pick him up.
~~~
The next day Brendon was minding his own business, frowning at the B he’d gotten on the history test, while he waited for Ryan by his locker.
“Ugh, I’m so glad today is over,” Ryan said, throwing his books noisily into his locker, and then pulling a couple of them back out to shove in his bag. “Mr Flowers can be such a dick. You will not believe how much homework he gave us today.”
Brendon knew Ryan didn’t really think Mr Flowers was a dick. Spencer had said that once, Ryan had called Mr Flowers a dreamboat. But Brendon was too scared to tease him about it, so he just hummed in agreement and glanced in the direction of Ryan’s glare back towards the classroom door he’d just exited.
Brendon’s heart stopped beating.
“Ryan,” he said urgently. “Ryan, who is that?”
Ryan, who had turned back to his locker, glanced over at the boys who were hanging out by the classroom door.
“Oh, Pete?” Ryan said, voice suddenly sounding dreamy. “Pete’s great. He’s so funny. And handsome. And so hanging all over Patrick,” he added, sounding annoyed.
“I mean, Patrick’s nice and all,” Ryan said earnestly to Brendon. “He let me share his book in class today. I just don’t see what’s so great about him that upperclassmen come down to wait for him after class.” The ‘instead of for me’ was unspoken but Brendon heard it anyway.
Normally he would have given Ryan a sympathetic hug, but he wasn’t sure that his heart was working again yet. And he had to know.
“No!” Brendon said. “That guy. With the hair.”
“Oh,” Ryan was dismissive. “That’s Joe Trohman. He’s in my year. He’s an okay dude, I guess. That’s Gabe and William with him too.”
“Joe Trohman,” Brendon breathed, and his heart started beating again, getting louder and louder as he walked towards Joe, books clutched to his chest.
“Greetings, Sir Joseph of Trohmania!” Brendon said loudly when he reached the group of guys.
Everyone stared at him. Not just the guys surrounding Joe, but everyone. The corridor went so quiet that Brendon could almost hear Ryan dying of embarrassment on his behalf.
“Uh,” Joe said, staring at him like he’d never seen Brendon before.
Like he hadn’t spared his life just the night before, hadn’t helped him from the ground, hadn’t clapped him on the shoulder. He acted like none of it had meant anything, and Brendon’s shoulders slump in disappointment.
“Never mind,” Brendon said, defeated, slinking back towards Ryan.
“Dude, that kid is weird,” Pete said, not bothering to keep his voice low. “What was he talking about? Do you even know him?”
“No,” Joe said. “And I have no idea what he’s talking about.”
“Weirdo,” Gabe chimed in, and Joe and his friends started to laugh. People around them started to laugh too.
The only person other than Brendon who wasn’t laughing was Ryan, who was glaring at him, lips thin and disappointed.
“Thanks a lot,” he said, slamming his locker door. “Pete’ll never pay attention to me if he figures out I’m friends with losers.”
He hurried off, not waiting for Brendon to catch up.
When he got outside, ignoring the laughter still ringing out behind him, Spencer was waiting for him outside the car. Ryan was in the passenger seat, buckled up and staring straight ahead.
“Ignore him,” Spencer said, and got behind the wheel. Brendon slid into the back seat and curled up in the corner, resting his forehead against the window.
It took three songs on the radio he liked and two of Spencer’s lame jokes to make Ryan smile enough to turn around and shoot a grin back at Brendon. They were almost at Spencer’s house by the time it happened, too long, really, but Brendon was just grateful Ryan had forgiven him at all. He didn’t have enough friends to risk losing them over stupid things.
Brendon knew that he was a strange kid. He liked who he was though, even if most people didn’t. He sometimes thought that maybe Ryan and Spencer were only his friends because he could play piano and bass and neither of them could, but at least they didn’t openly mock him for liking the things he liked.
He loved his role playing. He put a lot of time and effort and almost all of his allowance that didn’t go on guitar strings and picks, into it. He was proud of his character and what he’d achieved, and he was happy to tell people this. So he didn’t get why Joe hid it, like he was ashamed.
Brendon thought maybe Joe was just an asshole, but he wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt, and vowed to confront him about it at the park on the weekend.
~~~
Brendon got to the park late on Sunday, because he’d had to beg his sister for a ride. Everyone was already off in the woods, and Brendon hurried to catch up, to find Joe.
He dodged several fights, snuck around a group of magicians cooking up a powerful spell in an attempt to take the crown of the evil king, and made his way through the closely packed trees.
He finally found Joe just as he delivered the killing blow to a troll warrior. Brendon waited until the troll had ambled off before walking over.
“Hail,” he said.
Joe turned, and sighed when he saw Brendon.
“Oh it’s you. Canary,” he said, and Brendon tried not to feel a surge of pleasure that Joe had remembered his name.
“Guess you only recognise me when I have the wings on,” Brendon said and Joe made a face.
“Look, when we’re at school? I’m just Joe. No Sir Joe of whatever. No Rose Vest Superman. No knights or medieval battles or mystical creatures. I’m just me. This is something separate and I don’t want to talk about it at school.”
“Why?” Brendon asked.
Joe gripped his sword. “Because,” he said. “It’s not cool, okay? I like to keep it a secret, is all.”
Brendon frowned. “You’re a coward,” he exclaimed. “You pretend to be a knight, but really you’re a coward.”
“Fuck you,” Joe said, brandishing his sword. “I think it was a mistake to let you live last weekend. Time I collected that rose. And then you can leave me alone for good, okay?”
“That’s what we’re fighting for?” Brendon asked. “For me to leave you alone?”
Joe nodded.
“Fine,” Brendon said. “Then if I win? You have to talk to me at school. And not be a dick.”
“I wasn’t a dick to you,” Joe protested.
“Sure,” Brendon said. “If that was you being nice, then I’d really hate to see you when you’re being mean. Are we going to fight, or what?”
Joe didn’t reply, just swung his sword at Brendon.
Brendon was ready this time and blocked it. They fought for what seemed to be forever, and Joe managed to cut off one of Brendon’s arms, but Brendon retaliated by chopping off both of Joe’s legs.
Brendon had never won a battle before, but he’d never really been mad before either. He wasn’t sure why he was so mad at Joe being mean to him, denying that he knew Brendon or that he played this game. He wasn’t sure why he cared about Joe at all. But he knew that it made him mad enough to forget about worrying about hurting his opponent.
“Ha!” Brendon crowed triumphantly as he chopped Joe’s head off. “I win!”
Joe got up off the ground, ignoring the hand Brendon offered. “Well done,” he said sarcastically, grabbing his sword and stalking off. He was walking in the wrong direction, further into the woods, so Brendon ran after him.
“What do you want?” Joe asked, scowling. “Go away.”
“What is your problem?” Brendon demanded. “Why don’t you want to be my friend?”
“You’re weird!” Joe threw his hands up in the air and stopped, turning to face Brendon. “You’re weird and not cool and you play this game.”
“So do you!” Brendon reminded him. “I don’t get it.”
“I don’t expect someone like you to get it,” Joe snapped and Brendon glared.
“Don’t talk to me like that,” he said, reaching out and shoving Joe as hard as he could.
“Don’t fucking shove me,” Joe shoved him back and suddenly they were on the ground, rolling over and over, wrestling and shouting insults.
“Ow!” Brendon screeched as he rolled over a sharp rock and felt his wings crinkle and rip. “You’re such a dick,” he shouted, and Joe stopped trying to punch him and stared down at him.
“You are,” Joe said, and kissed him.
Joe tasted like copper from the blood at the corner of his mouth, and like dirt from where Brendon had shoved some in his face, but it was a good kiss anyway.
Brendon kissed him back, and then again and again. He was sad when Joe broke away and shoved his hands down between their bodies. Brendon winced, ready for Joe to punch him in the stomach or something but instead he shoved down Brendon’s tights and pulled his dick out, then pulled his own out too, shoving his pants out of the way as much as he could.
Brendon had never had someone else’s hand on his dick and he almost lost himself in happy thoughts about how now he had, but Joe settled back on top of him, kissed him again, and ground his hips down.
It was the best sensation Brendon had ever felt and he arched his back up, pressing himself up into Joe as much as he could.
Later, when Brendon had mopped up the sticky mess on their stomachs with his felt hat, they lay together in the leaves, staring up through the canopy of the trees.
“I’ve never done that before,” Brendon admitted, and Joe rolled over to grin at him.
“Really?” he asked. “Was it good? Did you like it? Do you want to do it again?”
“Yes, times three,” Brendon replied and grinned and kissed Joe. Doing it again meant Joe putting Brendon’s dick in his mouth and sucking him, which felt even better than the first thing, and then Brendon tried to do the same thing to Joe. Joe said it was okay that he wasn’t very good at it yet, that he would teach him.
“I think I might love you,” Brendon confessed as they got dressed again. It was almost time for his mom to pick him up, and he didn’t want her to come looking for him and find him trying to suck Joe’s dick.
Brendon blushed and looked away, embarrassed, but Joe reached out and grabbed his chin, turning Brendon to look at him.
“I think I maybe kinda love you too,” Joe said earnestly, and kissed him. They walked back to the parking lot hand in hand.
“See you tomorrow!” Brendon said, reluctantly letting go of Joe’s hand and ran to his mom’s car. He couldn’t wait to see Joe the next day in school.
~~~
“Joe!” Brendon exclaimed when Joe arrived the next morning. He’d gotten to school early so he could find and wait beside Joe’s locker and the hallways were still empty.
“Hey,” Joe said, grinning at him. He glanced up and down the hall, then leant in and kissed him.
“Look, I made you something,” Brendon said, holding out a box. He shuffled from foot to foot nervously as Joe opened it and looked inside.
“Dude!” Joe said, pulling out the helmet Brendon had made for him.
He’d stayed up really late last night making it, using his memory of his hands in Joe’s hair while they’d had sex, as a measurement of how big it needed to be. It was shiny and silver and just the right size, Brendon hoped.
“Thank you,” Joe said, grinning.
“Try it on!” Brendon told him, excitedly, but there were voices coming down the corridor.
“Later,” Joe said, shoving the helmet back into the box.
“Dude!” Pete greeted him, walking over with Patrick, Gabe and William in tow. “What’s that?” he pointed at the box.
“Uh, nothing,” Joe said, looking guilty. He shoved the box into his locker and shut the door. “Thanks kid,” he said dismissively to Brendon.
Brendon stared at him.
“Hey, it’s the weird dude,” Pete said. “You’re friends with that Ross kid, right? He’s hot.”
Beside him Patrick made an annoyed noise.
“Well, he is,” Pete continued. “Is he as much of a freak as you are, kid?”
William snorted. “From what I hear, no one is,” he said. “You do that thing where you think you’re, like, a wizard and run around with foam swords, right?”
Brendon nodded. “It’s great fun,” he said. “Joe does-”
“Not really want to hear about it,” Joe broke in. “Come on guys, lets get to class.”
They walked away, without looking back.
“Seriously,” Gabe said, loudly. “So weird.”
They all laughed.
Brendon managed to make it to the bathroom before he burst into tears.
~~~
That night he skipped band practice and went home. He got out his sewing machine and some scraps of red fabric, and got to work.
The next day he arrived early again and stuck the beautiful red rose he’d created onto the door of Joe’s locker.
He hoped Joe figured out what it meant. That by breaking his heart, Joe had killed him, and the rose was his prize for doing that. He hoped it would prick Joe a little when he sewed it onto his vest.
~~~
On Wednesday there was a note in his locker. It said:
Canary,
I’m so sorry. I didn’t know what to do. I’m a jerk. Forgive me?
Thank you for the beautiful helmet. I’m going to wear it on Sunday. Why don’t we fight a battle together?
Love,
Sir Joe of Trohmania
Aka your Coalmine.
Brendon stared at the note for ages. Then he screwed it up and threw it in the bin.
~~~
Sunday came and went and Brendon stayed in bed. He didn’t feel like role playing.
~~~
Ryan and Spencer were in the library getting some books, so Brendon ate his lunch alone on Monday. He sat in a corner of the cafeteria, colouring in a sketch he’d done of a new costume. He did that sometimes, when idea’s struck him. He didn’t want to work on this one, didn’t think it deserved it anymore, but he wanted to finish colouring in the dragon he’d drawn in the background.
“Holy shit, what the fuck is that?” the paper was snatched away from him and Brendon turned to see Gabe standing over him, holding it up to the light.
“Are you drawing pixies and shit? Is this for your renaissance fair nerd game?”
“Give it back,” Brendon said, reaching for it.
Gabe held it up higher. “Hey, Trohman!” he called. “You should see this!”
Brendon could see Joe look towards them. He got a strange look on his face when he spotted Brendon, but got up and walked over.
“What?” Joe asked, warily, and took the paper. He stared at it, then stared at Brendon.
“Is this for me?” he asked, pointing at the beautiful costume Brendon had drawn on the sketch of someone who looked very similar to Joe.
Brendon nodded.
“Dude,” Joe said. “I’ve been such a dick to you and you give me a wonderful present already, and now this?”
Gabe laughed. “Are you saying this makes sense to you?”
Joe stared at Gabe for a long moment, then at Brendon. He bit his lip. Then he walked out of the room.
“I guess not,” Gabe said, and Brendon’s heart sank. “Yo, Pete, look at this!” Gabe called, waving the paper he’d snatched back off Joe. “This is supposed to be Trohman!”
Pete and Patrick and William appeared by Gabe’s side and passed the paper back and forth between them, snickering.
“What’s going on?” Spencer asked, walking over with Ryan, who fluttered his eyelashes at Pete.
Brendon gave him a miserable look. He couldn’t believe that Joe had just run out like that. He knew Joe could be a dick, but he hadn’t thought he’d leave him there to be mocked like that.
“I don’t-” Brendon started to say, but everyone stopped laughing and went very quiet. Brendon peered around Ryan and saw Joe walking towards him. He was wearing the helmet, and it was a perfect fit, his hair spilling out from beneath it like a beautiful, courageous lion’s mane.
Joe pushed his way through the crowd and climbed up onto Brendon’s table. He smiled down at him.
“My name is Joe Trohman,” he said, voice ringing in the silent room. “And I am not ashamed to admit that I am a roleplayer. And I enjoy it. And I don’t care if no one thinks it’s cool, because I do, and that’s all that matters.”
He smiled down at Brendon and offered him a hand.
Brendon didn’t hesitate. He took it, grinning madly at Joe as he helped him onto the table.
“My name is Brendon!” he shouted. “And I role play as a fairy. And I like it!”
The room went deadly silent. From a distant corner came a titter of laughter.
And then Pete climbed onto the table opposite Joe and Brendon. “I’m Pete!” he called. “And I like to dress up in animal costumes.”
Silence answered him.
“Come on,” Pete hissed at his friends. None of them moved.
“Oh for fuck’s sake,” Ryan announced, and clambered onto the table beside Pete. “I’m Ryan, and sometimes I like to put on Spencer’s mom’s clothes.”
Pete grinned at Ryan and threw an arm around his waist. “Yeah!” Pete said, pumping his fist in the air.
Patrick frowned and climbed up on the other side of Pete. “I’m Patrick,” he said, glaring at Ryan. “And on Friday nights I dress up in purple sparkly spandex and perform as a Prince tribute act.”
Pete stared at Patrick, then let go of Ryan to grab Patrick and kiss him right on the mouth.
Ryan watched them, looking heartbroken. Brendon felt bad for him, especially because Joe had reached down and taken Brendon’s hand in his own.
Spencer cleared his throat. He didn’t get up on the table, but he did hold out a hand to Ryan. “I’m Spencer,” he said, quietly, but in the silent room, everyone could hear. “And I’m in love with my best friend.”
Ryan gasped. “Really?” he asked, and Spencer nodded, biting his lip nervously. Ryan took Spencer’s hand and climbed down from the table, hugging Spencer tightly and burying his face in Spencer’s neck.
That seemed to be a signal for everyone else to stand up and announce their weird secrets.
“I write Star Wars fanfic under the screenname hanshot1st,” Gerard Way announced, and Jon Walker immediately jumped up.
“Oh my god,” Jon exclaimed. “I read Star Wars fanfic. And you’re my favourite author!”
“I cosplay as Sailor Moon!” Mikey Way shouted as Jon and Gerard gravitated towards each other, grinning like maniacs.
“I only own one pair of pants!” Andy shared, even though that wasn’t so much of a surprise.
“I love Julia Roberts movies,” Bob said, glaring as if daring anyone to mock him.
“I collect My Little Ponies!” Cash announced from the far corner of the cafeteria.
All over the room more and more people shouted out their secrets, voices overlapping, the room becoming full of confessions that Brendon didn’t think people should feel they had to hide.
“I’m Gabe Saporta and I’m a virgin!”
The room when silent as everyone stared at the school’s self proclaimed ladies man, who just stood on the table top and shrugged.
“Bill?” Gabe asked pointedly, and William gave him a long suffering look.
“Fine,” he said, climbing up beside him. “I’m actually a girl, okay? I just like hanging out with you all in the locker rooms after gym so I can stare at your asses.”
Gabe smirked, and Brendon thought that with the look William gave him back, Gabe wouldn’t be a virgin for much longer.
Brendon turned to Joe and grinned. “Thank you,” he said quietly as more confessions carried on around them
Joe shook his head. “Thank you,” he said. “You taught me an important lesson about being myself and not being a dick and that we all do things other people think are weird. But it doesn’t matter as long as what we do makes us happy.”
“You know what I’d like to do?” Brendon asked. “It’d make me really, really happy.”
“What?” Joe asked, curious.
“You,” Brendon said, and Joe laughed and kissed him.
THE END.
makesomelove wanted Brendon/Joe influenced by the last good movie I saw, which happened to be Role Models. So here is a story about Brendon and Joe being role playing nerds, Joe keeping it secret, and everyone in their high school learning something important. Imagine Captain Planet or Heman or some other cartoon character popping up at the end to impart the lesson to you, okay? DON’T LITTER. SHARING IS CARING. YOU TOO HAVE THE POWER.
(Title from Role Models, character names stolen from that Guess-The-Names game FOB posted on FOE)
I Bet If I Suggested A Game Of Quidditch He’d Come In His Pants (Brendon/Joe)
One day Brendon was in the park. He was hiding behind a tree because he was almost out of stored magic, which meant he was vulnerable to attacks. Also, one of his wings was ripped and he needed to fix it when he got home. Maybe after dinner- tonight was spaghetti and meatballs and he didn’t want to be late for that.
The forest was quiet. For a moment Brendon worried that everyone had gone home and left him, but then he realised that it was too quiet. Something was wrong.
The back of his neck prickled like he was being watched and he turned around, just in time to avoid the sword that swung towards him and rebounded off the tree.
“Fuck,” said the knight, stumbling a little.
The knight swung his sword again, hitting Brendon on one leg, then the other, and Brendon fell to his knees. He clutched his sword tighter and struck out wildly, trying to defend himself, desperately looking for help.
The knight’s sword hit him in the arm, and he dropped his own sword to the ground. He dredged up his last bit of magic just as the knight’s sword hit his other arm. As he toppled over, Brendon muttered a spell that cast a temporary, weak shield around him.
“Well, that was pointless,” the knight said, sinking to the ground just outside the range of Brendon’s shield to wait out the five minutes it would take to fade.
Brendon rolled over so he could see the knight. “I had to do something to stop you killing me!” he exclaimed and the knight shrugged.
“It’s not going to stop it. Just postponing the inevitable.”
Brendon scowled at him, but the knight just shrugged and stretched out his legs, resting his sword across his lap.
“What’s your name, kid?”
Brendon glared at him for a long moment before sighing. “Canary,” he said.
The knight raised an eyebrow at him. “Canary? How come you have butterfly wings then? Shouldn’t you have, like, feathers or something?”
“They’re fairy wings!” Brendon snapped defensively.
The knight smirked. “A fairy called Canary?”
He laughed and Brendon wished he could fold his arms because it added so much more to the glare.
“Well, Canary,” the knight said, glancing at his watch. “Consider me your coalmine. Your time’s almost up. Prepare to die.”
“Who are you?” Brendon asked, stalling for time, still desperately hoping that someone would come by and rescue him. “I mean, I’ve not seen you around before.”
The knight grinned. “You,” he said, “can call me the Rose Vest Superman.”
He pointed at the vest he wore, adorned with several red roses. “I get one for each kill I make. You’re going to make it an even dozen.”
“Oh,” Brendon said, as his shield vanished. “Fine. I hope it’s a pretty rose then.”
The knight got to his feet and raised his sword over Brendon.
“Ready?” he asked and Brendon sighed.
“Sure,” he said, pouting. “I always die. I’m used to it by now.”
The knight started to let the sword fall. Brendon closed his eyes, wincing, waiting for the death blow to fall. But it never came.
Cautiously, he opened his eyes. The sword had stopped a few inches from his chest.
“Come on,” the knight said, sheathing his sword and offering a hand to Brendon. “We’ll tell them it was a draw.”
Brendon took the hand and let the knight pull him to his feet. “Why didn’t you kill me?”
The knight shrugged. “The vest’s getting crowded. Don’t really need another rose right now.”
“Oh,” Brendon said, dusting himself down. He checked his wing again, which was even more broken now that he’d been rolling around on the ground, and made a face.
“Can you fix it?” the knight asked and Brendon nodded.
“Oh, definitely,” he said, as they started to walk back towards the parking lot. “I’m good at making costumes.”
The knight looked Brendon up and down, taking in his bright yellow jerkin and tights. His shiny black boots and pointy ears.
“I can see that,” he said.
Brendon surveyed the knight too. Other than the fancy vest, his outfit was plain and boring, like he’d bought bits and pieces and tried to make a costume but hadn’t done a very good job of it.
“If you’re a knight,” Brendon asked, “how come you don’t wear a helmet?”
“I can’t find one that’ll fit over my hair,” the knight said, shaking his head so that his awesome curls flew everywhere as illustration.
“That’s a shame,” Brendon told him. “You know, I could probably help you out with that.”
The knight laughed and clapped him on the shoulder. “Don’t trouble yourself kid. Hey, I have to get going. See you around, yeah?”
He jogged off towards the parking lot, which had just come into view through the trees. Brendon kept walking slowly, greeting fellow warriors who were returning from their games. He watched as the knight got into a rusty old blue car and drove away.
Brendon thought about him a lot as he sat on the sidewalk and waited for his mom to come and pick him up.
~~~
The next day Brendon was minding his own business, frowning at the B he’d gotten on the history test, while he waited for Ryan by his locker.
“Ugh, I’m so glad today is over,” Ryan said, throwing his books noisily into his locker, and then pulling a couple of them back out to shove in his bag. “Mr Flowers can be such a dick. You will not believe how much homework he gave us today.”
Brendon knew Ryan didn’t really think Mr Flowers was a dick. Spencer had said that once, Ryan had called Mr Flowers a dreamboat. But Brendon was too scared to tease him about it, so he just hummed in agreement and glanced in the direction of Ryan’s glare back towards the classroom door he’d just exited.
Brendon’s heart stopped beating.
“Ryan,” he said urgently. “Ryan, who is that?”
Ryan, who had turned back to his locker, glanced over at the boys who were hanging out by the classroom door.
“Oh, Pete?” Ryan said, voice suddenly sounding dreamy. “Pete’s great. He’s so funny. And handsome. And so hanging all over Patrick,” he added, sounding annoyed.
“I mean, Patrick’s nice and all,” Ryan said earnestly to Brendon. “He let me share his book in class today. I just don’t see what’s so great about him that upperclassmen come down to wait for him after class.” The ‘instead of for me’ was unspoken but Brendon heard it anyway.
Normally he would have given Ryan a sympathetic hug, but he wasn’t sure that his heart was working again yet. And he had to know.
“No!” Brendon said. “That guy. With the hair.”
“Oh,” Ryan was dismissive. “That’s Joe Trohman. He’s in my year. He’s an okay dude, I guess. That’s Gabe and William with him too.”
“Joe Trohman,” Brendon breathed, and his heart started beating again, getting louder and louder as he walked towards Joe, books clutched to his chest.
“Greetings, Sir Joseph of Trohmania!” Brendon said loudly when he reached the group of guys.
Everyone stared at him. Not just the guys surrounding Joe, but everyone. The corridor went so quiet that Brendon could almost hear Ryan dying of embarrassment on his behalf.
“Uh,” Joe said, staring at him like he’d never seen Brendon before.
Like he hadn’t spared his life just the night before, hadn’t helped him from the ground, hadn’t clapped him on the shoulder. He acted like none of it had meant anything, and Brendon’s shoulders slump in disappointment.
“Never mind,” Brendon said, defeated, slinking back towards Ryan.
“Dude, that kid is weird,” Pete said, not bothering to keep his voice low. “What was he talking about? Do you even know him?”
“No,” Joe said. “And I have no idea what he’s talking about.”
“Weirdo,” Gabe chimed in, and Joe and his friends started to laugh. People around them started to laugh too.
The only person other than Brendon who wasn’t laughing was Ryan, who was glaring at him, lips thin and disappointed.
“Thanks a lot,” he said, slamming his locker door. “Pete’ll never pay attention to me if he figures out I’m friends with losers.”
He hurried off, not waiting for Brendon to catch up.
When he got outside, ignoring the laughter still ringing out behind him, Spencer was waiting for him outside the car. Ryan was in the passenger seat, buckled up and staring straight ahead.
“Ignore him,” Spencer said, and got behind the wheel. Brendon slid into the back seat and curled up in the corner, resting his forehead against the window.
It took three songs on the radio he liked and two of Spencer’s lame jokes to make Ryan smile enough to turn around and shoot a grin back at Brendon. They were almost at Spencer’s house by the time it happened, too long, really, but Brendon was just grateful Ryan had forgiven him at all. He didn’t have enough friends to risk losing them over stupid things.
Brendon knew that he was a strange kid. He liked who he was though, even if most people didn’t. He sometimes thought that maybe Ryan and Spencer were only his friends because he could play piano and bass and neither of them could, but at least they didn’t openly mock him for liking the things he liked.
He loved his role playing. He put a lot of time and effort and almost all of his allowance that didn’t go on guitar strings and picks, into it. He was proud of his character and what he’d achieved, and he was happy to tell people this. So he didn’t get why Joe hid it, like he was ashamed.
Brendon thought maybe Joe was just an asshole, but he wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt, and vowed to confront him about it at the park on the weekend.
~~~
Brendon got to the park late on Sunday, because he’d had to beg his sister for a ride. Everyone was already off in the woods, and Brendon hurried to catch up, to find Joe.
He dodged several fights, snuck around a group of magicians cooking up a powerful spell in an attempt to take the crown of the evil king, and made his way through the closely packed trees.
He finally found Joe just as he delivered the killing blow to a troll warrior. Brendon waited until the troll had ambled off before walking over.
“Hail,” he said.
Joe turned, and sighed when he saw Brendon.
“Oh it’s you. Canary,” he said, and Brendon tried not to feel a surge of pleasure that Joe had remembered his name.
“Guess you only recognise me when I have the wings on,” Brendon said and Joe made a face.
“Look, when we’re at school? I’m just Joe. No Sir Joe of whatever. No Rose Vest Superman. No knights or medieval battles or mystical creatures. I’m just me. This is something separate and I don’t want to talk about it at school.”
“Why?” Brendon asked.
Joe gripped his sword. “Because,” he said. “It’s not cool, okay? I like to keep it a secret, is all.”
Brendon frowned. “You’re a coward,” he exclaimed. “You pretend to be a knight, but really you’re a coward.”
“Fuck you,” Joe said, brandishing his sword. “I think it was a mistake to let you live last weekend. Time I collected that rose. And then you can leave me alone for good, okay?”
“That’s what we’re fighting for?” Brendon asked. “For me to leave you alone?”
Joe nodded.
“Fine,” Brendon said. “Then if I win? You have to talk to me at school. And not be a dick.”
“I wasn’t a dick to you,” Joe protested.
“Sure,” Brendon said. “If that was you being nice, then I’d really hate to see you when you’re being mean. Are we going to fight, or what?”
Joe didn’t reply, just swung his sword at Brendon.
Brendon was ready this time and blocked it. They fought for what seemed to be forever, and Joe managed to cut off one of Brendon’s arms, but Brendon retaliated by chopping off both of Joe’s legs.
Brendon had never won a battle before, but he’d never really been mad before either. He wasn’t sure why he was so mad at Joe being mean to him, denying that he knew Brendon or that he played this game. He wasn’t sure why he cared about Joe at all. But he knew that it made him mad enough to forget about worrying about hurting his opponent.
“Ha!” Brendon crowed triumphantly as he chopped Joe’s head off. “I win!”
Joe got up off the ground, ignoring the hand Brendon offered. “Well done,” he said sarcastically, grabbing his sword and stalking off. He was walking in the wrong direction, further into the woods, so Brendon ran after him.
“What do you want?” Joe asked, scowling. “Go away.”
“What is your problem?” Brendon demanded. “Why don’t you want to be my friend?”
“You’re weird!” Joe threw his hands up in the air and stopped, turning to face Brendon. “You’re weird and not cool and you play this game.”
“So do you!” Brendon reminded him. “I don’t get it.”
“I don’t expect someone like you to get it,” Joe snapped and Brendon glared.
“Don’t talk to me like that,” he said, reaching out and shoving Joe as hard as he could.
“Don’t fucking shove me,” Joe shoved him back and suddenly they were on the ground, rolling over and over, wrestling and shouting insults.
“Ow!” Brendon screeched as he rolled over a sharp rock and felt his wings crinkle and rip. “You’re such a dick,” he shouted, and Joe stopped trying to punch him and stared down at him.
“You are,” Joe said, and kissed him.
Joe tasted like copper from the blood at the corner of his mouth, and like dirt from where Brendon had shoved some in his face, but it was a good kiss anyway.
Brendon kissed him back, and then again and again. He was sad when Joe broke away and shoved his hands down between their bodies. Brendon winced, ready for Joe to punch him in the stomach or something but instead he shoved down Brendon’s tights and pulled his dick out, then pulled his own out too, shoving his pants out of the way as much as he could.
Brendon had never had someone else’s hand on his dick and he almost lost himself in happy thoughts about how now he had, but Joe settled back on top of him, kissed him again, and ground his hips down.
It was the best sensation Brendon had ever felt and he arched his back up, pressing himself up into Joe as much as he could.
Later, when Brendon had mopped up the sticky mess on their stomachs with his felt hat, they lay together in the leaves, staring up through the canopy of the trees.
“I’ve never done that before,” Brendon admitted, and Joe rolled over to grin at him.
“Really?” he asked. “Was it good? Did you like it? Do you want to do it again?”
“Yes, times three,” Brendon replied and grinned and kissed Joe. Doing it again meant Joe putting Brendon’s dick in his mouth and sucking him, which felt even better than the first thing, and then Brendon tried to do the same thing to Joe. Joe said it was okay that he wasn’t very good at it yet, that he would teach him.
“I think I might love you,” Brendon confessed as they got dressed again. It was almost time for his mom to pick him up, and he didn’t want her to come looking for him and find him trying to suck Joe’s dick.
Brendon blushed and looked away, embarrassed, but Joe reached out and grabbed his chin, turning Brendon to look at him.
“I think I maybe kinda love you too,” Joe said earnestly, and kissed him. They walked back to the parking lot hand in hand.
“See you tomorrow!” Brendon said, reluctantly letting go of Joe’s hand and ran to his mom’s car. He couldn’t wait to see Joe the next day in school.
~~~
“Joe!” Brendon exclaimed when Joe arrived the next morning. He’d gotten to school early so he could find and wait beside Joe’s locker and the hallways were still empty.
“Hey,” Joe said, grinning at him. He glanced up and down the hall, then leant in and kissed him.
“Look, I made you something,” Brendon said, holding out a box. He shuffled from foot to foot nervously as Joe opened it and looked inside.
“Dude!” Joe said, pulling out the helmet Brendon had made for him.
He’d stayed up really late last night making it, using his memory of his hands in Joe’s hair while they’d had sex, as a measurement of how big it needed to be. It was shiny and silver and just the right size, Brendon hoped.
“Thank you,” Joe said, grinning.
“Try it on!” Brendon told him, excitedly, but there were voices coming down the corridor.
“Later,” Joe said, shoving the helmet back into the box.
“Dude!” Pete greeted him, walking over with Patrick, Gabe and William in tow. “What’s that?” he pointed at the box.
“Uh, nothing,” Joe said, looking guilty. He shoved the box into his locker and shut the door. “Thanks kid,” he said dismissively to Brendon.
Brendon stared at him.
“Hey, it’s the weird dude,” Pete said. “You’re friends with that Ross kid, right? He’s hot.”
Beside him Patrick made an annoyed noise.
“Well, he is,” Pete continued. “Is he as much of a freak as you are, kid?”
William snorted. “From what I hear, no one is,” he said. “You do that thing where you think you’re, like, a wizard and run around with foam swords, right?”
Brendon nodded. “It’s great fun,” he said. “Joe does-”
“Not really want to hear about it,” Joe broke in. “Come on guys, lets get to class.”
They walked away, without looking back.
“Seriously,” Gabe said, loudly. “So weird.”
They all laughed.
Brendon managed to make it to the bathroom before he burst into tears.
~~~
That night he skipped band practice and went home. He got out his sewing machine and some scraps of red fabric, and got to work.
The next day he arrived early again and stuck the beautiful red rose he’d created onto the door of Joe’s locker.
He hoped Joe figured out what it meant. That by breaking his heart, Joe had killed him, and the rose was his prize for doing that. He hoped it would prick Joe a little when he sewed it onto his vest.
~~~
On Wednesday there was a note in his locker. It said:
Canary,
I’m so sorry. I didn’t know what to do. I’m a jerk. Forgive me?
Thank you for the beautiful helmet. I’m going to wear it on Sunday. Why don’t we fight a battle together?
Love,
Sir Joe of Trohmania
Aka your Coalmine.
Brendon stared at the note for ages. Then he screwed it up and threw it in the bin.
~~~
Sunday came and went and Brendon stayed in bed. He didn’t feel like role playing.
~~~
Ryan and Spencer were in the library getting some books, so Brendon ate his lunch alone on Monday. He sat in a corner of the cafeteria, colouring in a sketch he’d done of a new costume. He did that sometimes, when idea’s struck him. He didn’t want to work on this one, didn’t think it deserved it anymore, but he wanted to finish colouring in the dragon he’d drawn in the background.
“Holy shit, what the fuck is that?” the paper was snatched away from him and Brendon turned to see Gabe standing over him, holding it up to the light.
“Are you drawing pixies and shit? Is this for your renaissance fair nerd game?”
“Give it back,” Brendon said, reaching for it.
Gabe held it up higher. “Hey, Trohman!” he called. “You should see this!”
Brendon could see Joe look towards them. He got a strange look on his face when he spotted Brendon, but got up and walked over.
“What?” Joe asked, warily, and took the paper. He stared at it, then stared at Brendon.
“Is this for me?” he asked, pointing at the beautiful costume Brendon had drawn on the sketch of someone who looked very similar to Joe.
Brendon nodded.
“Dude,” Joe said. “I’ve been such a dick to you and you give me a wonderful present already, and now this?”
Gabe laughed. “Are you saying this makes sense to you?”
Joe stared at Gabe for a long moment, then at Brendon. He bit his lip. Then he walked out of the room.
“I guess not,” Gabe said, and Brendon’s heart sank. “Yo, Pete, look at this!” Gabe called, waving the paper he’d snatched back off Joe. “This is supposed to be Trohman!”
Pete and Patrick and William appeared by Gabe’s side and passed the paper back and forth between them, snickering.
“What’s going on?” Spencer asked, walking over with Ryan, who fluttered his eyelashes at Pete.
Brendon gave him a miserable look. He couldn’t believe that Joe had just run out like that. He knew Joe could be a dick, but he hadn’t thought he’d leave him there to be mocked like that.
“I don’t-” Brendon started to say, but everyone stopped laughing and went very quiet. Brendon peered around Ryan and saw Joe walking towards him. He was wearing the helmet, and it was a perfect fit, his hair spilling out from beneath it like a beautiful, courageous lion’s mane.
Joe pushed his way through the crowd and climbed up onto Brendon’s table. He smiled down at him.
“My name is Joe Trohman,” he said, voice ringing in the silent room. “And I am not ashamed to admit that I am a roleplayer. And I enjoy it. And I don’t care if no one thinks it’s cool, because I do, and that’s all that matters.”
He smiled down at Brendon and offered him a hand.
Brendon didn’t hesitate. He took it, grinning madly at Joe as he helped him onto the table.
“My name is Brendon!” he shouted. “And I role play as a fairy. And I like it!”
The room went deadly silent. From a distant corner came a titter of laughter.
And then Pete climbed onto the table opposite Joe and Brendon. “I’m Pete!” he called. “And I like to dress up in animal costumes.”
Silence answered him.
“Come on,” Pete hissed at his friends. None of them moved.
“Oh for fuck’s sake,” Ryan announced, and clambered onto the table beside Pete. “I’m Ryan, and sometimes I like to put on Spencer’s mom’s clothes.”
Pete grinned at Ryan and threw an arm around his waist. “Yeah!” Pete said, pumping his fist in the air.
Patrick frowned and climbed up on the other side of Pete. “I’m Patrick,” he said, glaring at Ryan. “And on Friday nights I dress up in purple sparkly spandex and perform as a Prince tribute act.”
Pete stared at Patrick, then let go of Ryan to grab Patrick and kiss him right on the mouth.
Ryan watched them, looking heartbroken. Brendon felt bad for him, especially because Joe had reached down and taken Brendon’s hand in his own.
Spencer cleared his throat. He didn’t get up on the table, but he did hold out a hand to Ryan. “I’m Spencer,” he said, quietly, but in the silent room, everyone could hear. “And I’m in love with my best friend.”
Ryan gasped. “Really?” he asked, and Spencer nodded, biting his lip nervously. Ryan took Spencer’s hand and climbed down from the table, hugging Spencer tightly and burying his face in Spencer’s neck.
That seemed to be a signal for everyone else to stand up and announce their weird secrets.
“I write Star Wars fanfic under the screenname hanshot1st,” Gerard Way announced, and Jon Walker immediately jumped up.
“Oh my god,” Jon exclaimed. “I read Star Wars fanfic. And you’re my favourite author!”
“I cosplay as Sailor Moon!” Mikey Way shouted as Jon and Gerard gravitated towards each other, grinning like maniacs.
“I only own one pair of pants!” Andy shared, even though that wasn’t so much of a surprise.
“I love Julia Roberts movies,” Bob said, glaring as if daring anyone to mock him.
“I collect My Little Ponies!” Cash announced from the far corner of the cafeteria.
All over the room more and more people shouted out their secrets, voices overlapping, the room becoming full of confessions that Brendon didn’t think people should feel they had to hide.
“I’m Gabe Saporta and I’m a virgin!”
The room when silent as everyone stared at the school’s self proclaimed ladies man, who just stood on the table top and shrugged.
“Bill?” Gabe asked pointedly, and William gave him a long suffering look.
“Fine,” he said, climbing up beside him. “I’m actually a girl, okay? I just like hanging out with you all in the locker rooms after gym so I can stare at your asses.”
Gabe smirked, and Brendon thought that with the look William gave him back, Gabe wouldn’t be a virgin for much longer.
Brendon turned to Joe and grinned. “Thank you,” he said quietly as more confessions carried on around them
Joe shook his head. “Thank you,” he said. “You taught me an important lesson about being myself and not being a dick and that we all do things other people think are weird. But it doesn’t matter as long as what we do makes us happy.”
“You know what I’d like to do?” Brendon asked. “It’d make me really, really happy.”
“What?” Joe asked, curious.
“You,” Brendon said, and Joe laughed and kissed him.
THE END.