Comments | boigotbeef: Am I just a waste of space?

boigotbeef

Am I just a waste of space?

Jul 20, 2003 22:16

Am I just a waste of space? I sure think so. I am living in a place I can’t even pay for. I work 40 hrs a week and still don’t make enough to live on. If I weren’t so self-conscious about my body, I sure would sell it. My ex did it, and she got $5000. Easy money. I apply for job after job and I don’t have any money. I really don’t have ( Read more... )

Comments 11

starboyo July 21 2003, 06:58:21 UTC

Whoa. I would say you are just a bit depressed. I know you don't want to hear this, but things will get better if you just give yourself some time and some patience.

Re: Thanks boigotbeef July 21 2003, 11:19:35 UTC

Thank you Orion, your comment is very well recieved.

Uhm...I don't think you're a waste of space... missyberg July 21 2003, 11:55:56 UTC

although I do know whta that mindset is like...not fun ...unless you ahve some reason to enjoy being there like I once did...anyway...this is about you...

It does sound like you're depressed...really depressed...it's too easy to take the mind down that path and not come back for a while too...especially if you have made a rut....

As for the realtionship stuff....that can be quite complicated but not impossible to manage..definately challenging at times....relationships are an ever changing ever new forming thing...stick to it...give yourself time to heal from the wounds of the last one..be ok with yourself....and then open to the new thing that will be even better...

If it's any consolation I would like to know you better...

I know it was a while since we met and the meeting wasn't very long...but I think of you quite often..and wonder how you're doing ...san fran is a challenging place to live...

Michelle

Re: Uhm...I don't think you're a waste of space... boigotbeef July 21 2003, 15:45:20 UTC

Thank you so much for those wonderful words. It really brightened my day. As for seeing me again...I am having a party at my house on the 26 (sat) and if you could come that would be cool, because I would like to see ya again.

Wow thanks for the invite! missyberg July 26 2003, 08:00:58 UTC

What time is the party? Are you cooking speghetti again? Or is just a social get together? Let me know..

Re: Wow thanks for the invite! boigotbeef July 26 2003, 14:30:51 UTC

the party starts at around 4-4:20. We are having barbecue, and people are bringing meat, veggie including. It is a social gathering and there is hella beer. The theme is Western, but the dress is not mandatory. It will last till whenever...so...feel free to come anytime. Hope you can make it.

Re: Wow thanks for the invite! missyberg July 26 2003, 17:07:57 UTC

I don't think I'll be making it after all. I underestimated the amount of work I need to get done today :( Hope to see you next time...maybe we can still hang out another day? I promise I am very much unlike some of the friends from your past...

Michelle

no shit... pretty717pixie July 27 2003, 02:26:00 UTC

omg. this sounds so much like me! Its scary isn't it? Feeling this way is scary as hell. Feeling like you don't have anyone to talk to... no where to go... You come from a family that, on the outside, looks so great... You've got it all! So, you're spoiled and ungrateful.. and how dare you complain! heh. It sucks, I know. I always feel like I'm just a big child. How the fuck will I take care of myself. I can't do it now.. I'll never be able to. No one can make me feel like a belong. People around me seem to want me around.. but, do they? I never believe I'm wanted, so I leave as quickly as possible to go back to my lonliness. heh. Its a pathetic existance. The only people I believe love me either make me feel inferior (unknowingly, perhaps?), or are so far away. I'm ugly. I'm stupid. I'm disgusting. I'm helpless. I'm alone. I'm a burden. I feel overcome with the urge to crawl into a hole and just give up. But, you know what Legs? I won't. And, neither will you. We're going to get through this shit. And, we're going to be stronger for ( ... )

Re: no shit... boigotbeef July 27 2003, 14:42:54 UTC

Nikki you are truly God sent. I thank God for you, and thank you for being in my life and for being so wonderful.

Re: no shit... ljnp4u September 11 2003, 12:54:16 UTC

This was posted while I was on holiday. I missed it. I went out alone, if that is the story of how my life will be it sure doesn't look good, but it describes it exactly as it is now. I mean, almost to the point of being scarily accurate.

Can I join the club ?

Re: no shit... pretty717pixie September 12 2003, 10:33:50 UTC

:) of course.