It's amazing what a vidid experience a family funeral can be, and the several days around it. I think you did a great job writing it up, even without your notes.
My mom has sung that "Touch of the Master's Hand" song several times in church, and at least once at a funeral. I know it well. I liked it as a kid but now it feels manipulative, and I prefer "Devil Went Down to Georgia" too. :)
he commented that Papa was a religious man, and maybe in those terms it wasn't so out of line. I don't know. What do you guys think?I think it depends on whether you look at the funeral as being more to comfort the living, or honor the wishes of the dead. I'm sure that if my mother, for example, planned her own funeral, she would request that a "salvation message" be included in the sermon. (Among my people, a lot of weddings have this element as well, at the request of the bride and groom.) She would want it because her faith is such an important part of who she is, and part of that faith is the belief that if a person hasn't (to use the parlance)
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warning- long commentallthatjazmyneMarch 2 2007, 21:01:43 UTC
Are you honorable? Do you honor God the way Jim did?I think if you look at that as two separate questions, you can answer the first while disregarding the second. Are there aspects of your grandfather's life, actions, and values that you can emulate? Does your own personal definition of "honor" apply to you
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Re: warning- long commentboliverMarch 2 2007, 21:21:26 UTC
I get what you're saying about each person attending the funeral having their own perspective on things, and that makes sense. At the same time, the pastor didn't just talk about what a devout person my grandfather was. That would have been fine- we're there to honor him, and remember him, warts and all. Whatever I believe about missle systems, he worked on them; it just...IS. Not changeable, and thus worthy of our thinking on it. If it were your funeral, or wedding, and the service focused on your beliefs, it's all good- we're there for you
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Re: warning- long commentastrablueMarch 3 2007, 08:24:18 UTC
As a religious person, I know it would be important to me that my funeral (which I'm not planning for a couple of decades, btw) reflect my beliefs about life, death, and what comes next, and I would just hope that those who don't believe those same things would accept them as part what mattered to me, and part of what made up the total package of Me. I would feel bad if some of those attending my funeral were uncomfortable with the religious elements, but I would still want them there.I agree with Julia here, with the extra caveat that I still wouldn't want direct proselytizing at my services (wedding or funeral). Catholic Masses aren't generally all "Convert ye or perish!" anyway - it's left up to the person to later go and talk to someone (priest, nun, another parishioner) if they're so moved. Something like "Go forth and love one another/honor your loved ones/take care of the earth," though - I don't think that's objectionable
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Re: warning- long commentboliverMarch 3 2007, 23:31:08 UTC
See, that's why I used the quotes around "religious." To me, religious people (no quotes) are genuine, non-judgmental, accepting, independent, spiritual, thinking people who happen to subscribe to specific religious tenets.
"Religious" people, on the other hand, use their "religion" as an excuse to assume that everyone outside of their own bubble are going Straight to Hell. I don't know any "religious" people, but I do know plenty of religious people, including you and jaz.
I should have been more specific, there.
It reminds me of Brother Cavel's delivery of the term God when he uses it in speech in Battlestar Galactica. I love his character.
Your extra caveat in your first sentence is the whole enchilada to me; it's the difference between offensive and wholly acceptable and respectful.
Sounds similar to my Grandmother's funeral nigh on ten years ago. That whole side of the family is quite religious, go figure with Gma and Gpa being bible translators in Mexico for thirty years. So the services and everyone before and after was very, very big on the religion and my sister and I were made very uncomfortable. Same thing at my uncle's funeral in Georgia a couple years ago. I just want to remember Grandma for her crossword puzzles and ability to argue over whether Jesus might have been a woman and other similar scandalous dogma. She believed, but not in a force it down your throat way and I respect her beliefs as I hope mine would be respected.
As for the missile thing, I have tried to avoid working said items for my whole career although I did work on a fighter jet for a year or so. But the first thought in my engineer head was, hmm I wonder which missile systems? ;)
Thanks, sweetie. I can ask my dad about which missle systems.
Everyone, reddig is a very old friend of mine, back probably to junior high school. We went to Unitarian church together, and he's one of the most wonderful humans I've ever known. His wife is lovely and gracious and sweet, and they have a beautiful son who is named after a fictional creature. Pretty cool.
And more importantly, his wife is the person who lent me her live-from-original-airing Buffy tapes, to get me caught up after I first started watching during season 4. So, she fed my potential addiction, which led me to MBTV, which led me to meet all of you wonderful folks. I owe them, really, for the biggest major obsession in my life so far. Cheers!
I asked my dad about the missle systems, and he said that it was really advanced guns Papa worked on more than missle systems, so that's what they talked about recently, but that Papa had worked on the Sidewinder system way back when, maybe trying to get it adapted for shipboard use.
This is what I get for using one of those church pew pencils.
Oh, absolutely. I think I've already let it go; I just wanted to do a brain dump here and see what others thought about my train of thought at the time. I don't tend to hang onto stuff like that
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Comments 14
My mom has sung that "Touch of the Master's Hand" song several times in church, and at least once at a funeral. I know it well. I liked it as a kid but now it feels manipulative, and I prefer "Devil Went Down to Georgia" too. :)
he commented that Papa was a religious man, and maybe in those terms it wasn't so out of line. I don't know. What do you guys think?I think it depends on whether you look at the funeral as being more to comfort the living, or honor the wishes of the dead. I'm sure that if my mother, for example, planned her own funeral, she would request that a "salvation message" be included in the sermon. (Among my people, a lot of weddings have this element as well, at the request of the bride and groom.) She would want it because her faith is such an important part of who she is, and part of that faith is the belief that if a person hasn't (to use the parlance) ( ... )
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"Religious" people, on the other hand, use their "religion" as an excuse to assume that everyone outside of their own bubble are going Straight to Hell. I don't know any "religious" people, but I do know plenty of religious people, including you and jaz.
I should have been more specific, there.
It reminds me of Brother Cavel's delivery of the term God when he uses it in speech in Battlestar Galactica. I love his character.
Your extra caveat in your first sentence is the whole enchilada to me; it's the difference between offensive and wholly acceptable and respectful.
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As for the missile thing, I have tried to avoid working said items for my whole career although I did work on a fighter jet for a year or so. But the first thought in my engineer head was, hmm I wonder which missile systems? ;)
Hugs for sharing
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Everyone, reddig is a very old friend of mine, back probably to junior high school. We went to Unitarian church together, and he's one of the most wonderful humans I've ever known. His wife is lovely and gracious and sweet, and they have a beautiful son who is named after a fictional creature. Pretty cool.
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This is what I get for using one of those church pew pencils.
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