stressed out ranting....
Maybe if I just go to sleep for about a year, I will magically wake up with all of the answers. That would be terrific, doubt it will happen, but it would be fan-damn-tastic!
More and more I hate my job, I don't have a new one lined up yet for this summer, so for now, I'm sticking it out, with the vague understanding with myself that I've gotten myself stuck in a situation where I need to grow some balls and just get out before I (figuratively) die. I hate working for someone who expects me to know all of the answers when they don't even know what's going on half the time. But then again, if i just quit without another (better) job lined up, well, there goes a future reference, colleague, mentor of any kind...
So most of the drama that I acquired from the friends in my life (no worries I still love you all, don't take that the wrong way, I adore being able to sympathize and help you out whenever I can!) has passed, but now there is actually drama that is my own. Oddly enough, it really shouldn't be, and I've almost stopped caring about it once or twice. But we all know how I work. I can't take tension. Some people are just unreasonable, they think they can throw all your faults into your face, but refuse to accept responsibility for any faulty behavior on their own part, and that just pisses me off. I'll take your criticisms to heart, and i'll try harder next time. But, 1) be ballsy enough to say something to my face, leave an IM in the middle of the night for me to wake up to and 2) after I respond, be courteous enough to either apologize, or make a rebuttal, don't just block me on IM (so very immature, as if I don't know, or do care) and pretend I don't exist or that it's just going to all go away. Dear me...grow up and face life like an adult, shit happens, even between friends, eventually you have to talk to the person, grow from the experience and move on!!!! I don't know about the rest of you, but i have fights over shit (Big and small) with my friends all the time...in fact I think my best friendships are the ones where we've had to sit there and not talk for a couple days and then just hash it all out (good and bad) learn more about ourselves and each other, and then decide that keeping our friendship was more important than being defensive and bitchy.
Other news: Spring break with Kristyn was amazing. There were goats in trucks, guitar playing and dog walking on the side of the highway, and filming our own music videos. I loved getting to just hang out with friends and family. I really do miss you guys ALOT, ALL THE TIME!!! Livi, I promise, this summer...I'm coming to Cali...I don't know when,how, but my ass is getting there...I need a hug, the quality of which only , the one true Big O can administer.
School is stressing me out, work is stressing me out, life stresses me out, but if I can just stay sane for a little while longer...I promise...It'll all be happy again.
More and more I hate my job, I don't have a new one lined up yet for this summer, so for now, I'm sticking it out, with the vague understanding with myself that I've gotten myself stuck in a situation where I need to grow some balls and just get out before I (figuratively) die. I hate working for someone who expects me to know all of the answers when they don't even know what's going on half the time. But then again, if i just quit without another (better) job lined up, well, there goes a future reference, colleague, mentor of any kind...
So most of the drama that I acquired from the friends in my life (no worries I still love you all, don't take that the wrong way, I adore being able to sympathize and help you out whenever I can!) has passed, but now there is actually drama that is my own. Oddly enough, it really shouldn't be, and I've almost stopped caring about it once or twice. But we all know how I work. I can't take tension. Some people are just unreasonable, they think they can throw all your faults into your face, but refuse to accept responsibility for any faulty behavior on their own part, and that just pisses me off. I'll take your criticisms to heart, and i'll try harder next time. But, 1) be ballsy enough to say something to my face, leave an IM in the middle of the night for me to wake up to and 2) after I respond, be courteous enough to either apologize, or make a rebuttal, don't just block me on IM (so very immature, as if I don't know, or do care) and pretend I don't exist or that it's just going to all go away. Dear me...grow up and face life like an adult, shit happens, even between friends, eventually you have to talk to the person, grow from the experience and move on!!!! I don't know about the rest of you, but i have fights over shit (Big and small) with my friends all the time...in fact I think my best friendships are the ones where we've had to sit there and not talk for a couple days and then just hash it all out (good and bad) learn more about ourselves and each other, and then decide that keeping our friendship was more important than being defensive and bitchy.
Other news: Spring break with Kristyn was amazing. There were goats in trucks, guitar playing and dog walking on the side of the highway, and filming our own music videos. I loved getting to just hang out with friends and family. I really do miss you guys ALOT, ALL THE TIME!!! Livi, I promise, this summer...I'm coming to Cali...I don't know when,how, but my ass is getting there...I need a hug, the quality of which only , the one true Big O can administer.
School is stressing me out, work is stressing me out, life stresses me out, but if I can just stay sane for a little while longer...I promise...It'll all be happy again.