Tales from the Boobie Bar!
A bouncer actually kicked someone out for me the other night :D
He thought it'd be cute to tip me in the side of my g-string, then try to slide his hand up and grab my boob.
Ha.
No, sorry.
I told that bouncer, who actually gives a shit, and something actually got done about it. Very nice :D I did not have to administer my squirrely-related justice this time.
So I showed up for my shift a bit early a few days ago. I'm hanging out in the DJ booth, chitchatting, when this random guy walks up to the booth. He stares at me.
Me=Yay!
G=Guy
K=Kyle, the DJ
Me=...can I help you?
G=*stares at me more, then stares at K*
K=...er, whatcha need there, buddy?
G=Do couch dances cost money?
K=Of course-$20 per dance.
G=*tosses $20 at K* Tell that girl *gestures vaugely* to come get me and give me one.
K=*tosses money back* You pay the girl, not me. She's the one doing the dance.
G=Well, just tell her.
K=WHICH girl?
G=That one. *gestures vaugely again, towards an area with about three dancers*
K=...
Me=The blonde, the tall brunette, or the short brunette?
G=*stares at me* Uh. The short brunette. That's what I've been saying.
Me=Actually...
G=Just send her over. *huffs off*
Me+K=...o_O
So once the girl was done her tip round and came back, we pointed her to him. After she did the dance for him, she told us that he was trying to be very touchy, and he was nearly thrown out.
This last guy was a real weirdo.
Younger guy. Maybe a year or two younger than me. He stared around at everything with this look of mixed disdain/wonder.
I got up on stage right after he came in, did my set (which he watched intently), and came around.
Me=Still in ur barz, shakin mai azz
WG=Weird Guy
WG=Hi! Know what?
Me=What's that, hon?
WG=You're a good dancer!
Me=Thanks!
WG=I don't have respect for dancers, but you're good at dancing.
...oh hell no.
Me=Well, you *should* have respect for us. Just as much as you would have for any person, working hard to make ends meet.
WG=...oh. I don't have any money, and you guys don't have an ATM.
Me=Actually, we do have an ATM *smilesmile* *leads him over to our ATM station*
WG=*uses it*
Me=*wanders off*
Even after he had cash, he tried not to tip the girls-went so far as to stick his head in his shirt when G went around o.O
Then another girl, S, went and chatted him up about dances. He agreed to a Champagne Court.
Courts are normally 30 minutes long.
This Court lasted about seven minutes.
The guy just kept trying to *grab* her. Everywhere. Tits, ass, kitty-you name it, he tried it.
As he was being forcibly expelled, he had the gall to get angry with us for not doing what he wanted.
If you want a hooker, go elsewhere. Like down the city or something.
But thanks-
To the guy who brought his friend in-his friend had never been to a strip club, and asked me very earnestly if I could please do some upside-down polework, because he'd never seen it before and didn't know if it was possible. Thank you for the applause when I obliged, and thank you for the extra tip ^_^
To the guy who got a dance with me then tipped me another $20 on top of it.
And to the girls dressed up as Alice in Wonderland and Snow White for cheering, tipping, and generally being fun ^_^