What to do? What to do?

[bookwrangler]

Lately, Brett and I have been doing a lot of talking about the future. Apparently, he has the engagement all planned out and, because he knows I'll say yes, he's going to have fun with it. I think that that is fantastic - I'm not at all about doing things seriously.

I'm learning a lot about myself in the process. I've always thought of myself as

Comments

[boxcarwilly]

I do think that even if you elope, you should make sure that your mom is there at the very least. If you decide not to elope, I can give you the number of the non-denominational feminist minister that married Grant and me.

Also, I like your wedding band idea, but that's probably because that's the same route Grant and I took. We have matching Celtic knots. Yeah, at first people were confused, but I didn't care about explaining why I didn't have some giant, wasteful rock dangling off my finger. I also like that our rings match--I think that's adorable. After you're married for awhile, people stop asking about it anyway, so I wouldn't worry too much about that.

[bookwrangler]

Out of curiosity, what's your reason for why I should have my mom there.

Here's why: If my mom comes (and I'd obviously want Steve there if Mom was there), how do Brett and I show wedding photos to the remaining parents without anyone getting bent out of shape?

And, he'll want to have his friend Sean there if we get married in Vegas because Sean lives all of an hour away. So, that being said, why shouldn't I ask Theresa?

All of a sudden, an elopement becomes a small ceremony and I'm going Bridezilla.

~~~
Not that I'm really worried about people questioning my choices, but did anyone in the family give you a hard time for your ring in the familial passive-agressive way?

I don't so much worry about people asking me why I chose the ring I did... I'd be proud to defend it. What worries me is the behind-the-back rumor mongering when I WON'T be there to talk about it. Granted, anyone who knows the two of us sees what's there and wouldn't need to do that... but, you're my relative. You know what we're up against.

[boxcarwilly]

Well, I guess I should have clarified: your mom, his parents, a couple close friends. But when it comes to stuff like this, you're right, you either keep it very tiny (as in, just you two) or do the whole shebang. Otherwise, someone will be offended.

I even had issues with my mom when planning mine because Grant invited aunts and uncles because he didn't have any grandparents to invite (we both invited about twenty-five people). Since Penny's sister came, my mom thought that your mom should come too. But, if I did that, then I would have to invite Carol, Roger, Bill, Fran, etc., etc...so, I know what you mean.

I guess my point, though, is that it is possible to do it small and have some family and friends there, too, if you decide not to do the Vegas elopement. But in the end, it's about what you two want, not anyone else