this is our brains, rattling around

[bothers]

speed fiction, from gayre and gaythers

jaejoong, tablo, nighttime talks & self-discovery (of sorts).

---

until 9.15 PM, 11/19/08

Comments

[flickre]

"I FUCKING HATE YOU" said jaejoong when he walked out the door,

but didn't say those kind of things so

he just left.

[bothers]

he smokes because he can,
but he loves because they expect him to.

"don't conform don't conform don't," he tells himself,

but he gets. scared.

[flickre]

"why not," jaejoong says, "try this."

the new brand tastes foul, stomach-sickening as it curls around his throat swallowing words that swallow lies that swallow wants and desire.

[bothers]

"nah," tablo says with a shake of his head, "i've heard those smokes are really gross.."

he prefers to stick to something he knows

tried, but true.

[flickre]

he coughs, yeah, maybe he should have stuck to his brand. yoochun's tastes were terrible, even if he did smell good at three am with coffee.

"someone told me that when you move to a new country you go through brands until you settle for the sixth one.

or was it seven-?" said jaejoong, "it was the seventh. yoochun said that was lucky."

[bothers]

(tablo)
it's not that i want to be different for the sake of being different..

(younha)
then what is it?

(tablo)
i don't know. ordinary life just seems so.. well, mundane.

(younha)
[silence]

(younha)
and when were you ever ordinary?

(tablo)
[doesn't answer]

[bothers]

(tablo)
what do you remember?

(younha)
wh-what do you mean?

(tablo)
things, people, places? i remember how we met.
how our goals were the same. how we decided to make music.

(younha)
you make it sound sacred, like our meeting was pre-ordained.

(tablo)
i don't believe in god...

[bothers]

(younha)
hey....

(tablo)
[distracted]
what?

(younha)
[hesitates]
...nothing.

(tablo)
[silence]

(younha)
....oppa?

(tablo)
yes?

(younha)
i read a book the other day, and in it, one of the character says..
says, "do you love?", and it struck me as beautiful.
don't you think it's beautiful?

(tablo)
...only if you like that sort of thing.

[flickre]

she's not that bad, he says.

that's only 'cause she's the only girl you've been allowed to go near.

yeah, i know. but she smells nice.