Year of 2005
Just like penina... take the first post in the months of 2005 and post it as your "review of 2005" ^_^
January 2005
In with the new.... out with the old...
allright... well I'm still debating on if I should go ahead and take a shower before I go to sleep tonight... or just go ahead and wait till morning when I wake up to get ready for work... i'm not sure exactly how that works... but all I do know is that I should be sleeping right now just as it is... otherwise, i'm going to be pretty tired tomorrow night...
Today was the usual day... for the most part I have to say that things were as usual at Starbucks... it was busy as always, and we were understaffed as always as well. Dinah had come in for a second to talk about some things... but of course she never once helped us out at work... oh well... i'm getting used to it now. Jess and I had kahlua and coffee during work to make things better for us...haha... it was soooo funny and great. I was in the back office helping Jess out with the milk order when Gina came up to me telling me that Andrew was in the store and that I should go ahead and see him... of course I was busy and I never got the chance to see him afterall... I was kinda sad about it because I was really hoping that he was going to message me letting me know that he was on his way instead of surprising me... but he had many other things on his mind... like the thought that he had called about nine other hotels just trying to see if there was a room available... on the last night of his stay here on the Big Island... of course I didn't hear about all of this until today... and I have to say... i'm damn excited about tomorrow now...haha
Feb. 2005
Something came over me last night that made me want to write so much... I started to write it down... and just before I finished typing it out... I realized that it was something that I shouldn't be writing... it was giving away to much of me for all to see... and I knew in the end that it would actually hurt me overall... and so with all that I could bear... I deleted the post... never to be seen again.
I had brunch with dan... it was really nice... to be able to just relax for once and just have a good time... eating no less...haha... the food was good and the company was wonderful as well... so far, Tiffany and Mike, Eric and Sean, and Dan are the ones that I feel as though I will miss the most so far... aside from my family... when I go
Scott too...
which leads me to this topic... me leaving... and where... well so far its going to be Hilo... and allthough i'm not really going to be leaving the island... its the fact that the majority of my family is there and the fact that I will be somewhere that I have never felt uncomfortable around... and I love the people that are there... I'm begining to feel the anxiety... in anticipation of moving there...
I talked to my parents today about the whole thing (which was their idea in the first place). I told them that I had a really good friend that was willing and nice enough to let me be their roomate when I move over... however so far she's not bought on that idea... and would like instead for me to live in my own apartment... and in a way she's right... and in a way its a bummer... but i'm at no point in my life to have the need to make my own decisions...haha.. not in the right state of mind at least. blah
If anything the plan is for me to go into the college world in the fall... seeing as I won't be able to make it by March to turn in all of my applications n stuff... not to mention get myself out of debt and have my record away from my accident and attempted suicide... and all that other stuff... blah
I miss hilo a lot now... I miss my awong family... and I miss most of all the rain... this morning was a wake-up call for that feeling as I awokened with the strongest wind and rain fall that I have seen in a long time... and I loved it... I made it a fact to get up and enjoy it... just because sleeping through it would have been a waste... it doesn't happen very often at all in Kona... and it was my sign that Hilo would be comforting to me... knowing that the wind and rain is there.... and those elements I love so dearly.
I all but have one fear... I know my life... and I know how I am...
I don't want to screw up my gay life there in Hilo... hopefully family there in Hilo (gay family at least) will help me more than the Kona side would ever. ha
i'm looking forward to the drunken nights... yes... and yet all at the same time... i'm really looking forward to the study sessions and the clubs that are there to be offered... mainly GLO... as I can't wait to be completly active in it... I can't wait to speak up my mind and let my Hilo family know that i'm serious about who I am as a gay person! ^_^
of course as all things go... anything can happen from now till then... when I can actually go to college... the hope is that I make it there...
night for now...
-Devin
March 2005
"playing around is what i'm good at"
Well Ex... You couldn't have chosen a bettr quote for yourself other than that... ha
There was a time that I actually thought that if I was to keep his picture that I would soon run into him and he and I would have this wonderful revelation that we really ought to be together... blah... that was today...haha... oh wellz, I've just realized that no matter what happens... that won't happen... its like thinking that Andrew actually considered being with me... haha... even more funny
anyway, I'm not feeling good... and I would really like a cig right now... but i'm trying to be good... however i'm good at being bad as well... ^_^ I've also come to the conclusion that I'm good at what I do... good and bad... and that there will be a balance with both no matter what...
I had to laugh at myself today... I almost fell for it again... I was almost "used" in the normal fasion... slow and painful... "slow" as in the amount of money spent (10,000) over a period of time to collect my ten grand of miles... and the "painful" as in the pain that I would feel watching it and my ex run to Oahu (at my expense), stay in my room "STAY...NO SEX" ((not that i'd want it)) and take off back to Kona without a single thank you... I'm glad that i'm going by myself... i'll have more fun and I'll be able to go again...
I gave Jay the opportunity to let me turn the other way and not even think of being "used" as a possibility... until I told him that it would be nice if he would set-up the time and flight numbers that he would like to board on for the flight... he hasn't called and probably won't call... its too much work for him... or at least thats what I gather... oh well... maybe he'll find his own way to Oahu and i'll see him there... we can party then... i'm not spending a single penny on him right now...
... So I went to Hilo today... it was a lot of fun... I don't care to share the details other than... finding out that Stephen is going to be on Oahu this weekend... from Maui... and so am I! he just called me back to leave me a message that he wants to get together while were both there! hah! we will have our tryst afterall... (wishful thinking of course... it won't happen)....haha... a boy can dream though... can't he
April 2005
allright ladies and gents.... its time for Devin to make yet another updated post... that will probably only last as much as a few sentences... because he can't ever spend the quality time to make a decent post about himself... hah
anyway, I'm in Hilo right now... and at Melvins house. I'm going to be here till either Thursday or Friday... depending on how things work out with time and such... haha... and if Melvin can stand me for that long of time... haha..
ho hum... what to update... what to update...
soooo.... first of all... work has been driving me crazy lately... mainly when I have to work with my two bosses all at the same time... but of course I'm always rambling about that... so i'll move on to other things...
Melvin and I are dating now... so i'm sorry guys... but he's taken ^_^... and so far... all's well... as both his parents and mine both have no quarrels about the whole thing... at least so far ^_^
well... ho hum... I can't really think about what else to write... so i'll take a break and write later... ciao!
-Dev
May 2005
Allright... Mixmeister on? [done!]
Music?? [done!]
Money?? [Bad File!]
...WTF?!!
haha... so yeah, today was a great day! hah... well sorta... I got up eventually... had two conversations on the phone
T-Mobile - I have money (Credit) on my account and everythings all great and wonderful... but I have to wait 2months until they have the ability to send me my check with the credit... bah
HFSFCU - I'm sorry Devin... but you don't have enough collateral.. and soooo a co-signer would be needed... damn!
and so that was my morning... things wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't for the fact that I don't have my cellphone... but i'll have to get back to that one later... in the meantime... I was rushing to Cingular to let Noah know that I've lost my phone and find out what it would take to get another one... soon...
He told me that it would cost me 50bucks to get a replacement phone... and in my eyes that isn't so bad... but when I go ahead and put money into my savings I realize that I really have no money (I gots my 500.00 still... but nothing much else... and the party's coming up!!! damn... so i'm feeling the money scrunch right now...
anyway, I get home and I call Macy's Alamoana.... and after calling them back a half hour later they tell me that they are going to send my phone to my house!!! yay!!! so as far as I now... there will not be a charge... and if thats the case... i'm all good and 50 dollars are still to my name! haha... BUT! because I haven't been working much it just evens out in the long run... or rather I still lose on the financial issue... arg!
damn I miss Melvin... wish he would call me... but oh wait! I don't have a cellphone for him to call now do I?! dammit... arg!
June 2005
I'm spongebob!
well... maybe not exactly... but thats what that cartoon personality test thingy said!!! heh... anyway, ho hum... I miss Melvin... my laptop hasn't come back yet... (fixed hopefully)... I'm still working at Starbucks... I really wanna just sit and read my book (Christopher Rice is awesome!!) and I can't wait to talk to my boyfriend! haha...
I work at 2:30 tomorrow evening... grrr... its only 10:50PM... wheres my boyfriend...
thats it... i'm calling him now... bye!
Sasha i'm counting down the days too!!! hehe... oh, and i'm still mad at both of you guys (you know who you are) for not telling me that you guys were coming back... arg! AND showing up at MY workplace "just like that"...hahaha... just kiddin... i'm fine... really... I just wish that I could really hear you guys... you know... since I was partially deaf all day today... that was great... I still can't hear.... arg!
July 2005
Allright, My Livejournal's yet again paid... and soo.... yet another year of journal entries...
oh... and podcasting rocks!
August 2005
like woah....
weird dreams.... I was doing ballet and I was good at it too!
also, I felt emotionally and physically drained by melvin asking me to do too many things in one day... it was a friday and he was pushing me to do him more favors even though I was telling him that I was tired. Weird... hopefully that doesn't happen to me...or rather to us... as so far things are good and he hasn't been like that so much...
thats all...
Sept 2005
like woah... I haven't posted in such a looooong time! grrr... anyway, lots of stuff happening... but more to come later... for now, i'm packing slowly and i'll soon be off to Hilo! yessss Hilo... moving in with the guy finally! ^_^
cant wait till i'm there! whew!
October 2005
OMFG! so I know I haven't writting in this journal in a bit... but its only because I haven't really had any "alone time" nor do I right now... but I did want to just post a bit while I have the chance... Melvin and I have a baby!... well A baby puppy that is... heh...
However right now I have the job to watch both Harmony (Our puppy) and Mini (Chris' puppy) and they are both driving me mad... both are teaching eachothers bad habbits and now Harmoney doesn't like being left alone in the bathroom... which up to this point was quite fine with her... damn dogs... grrr...
whatever... there, I needed to vent...
oh, and if anybody ever wanted to see what It was sorta like to raise a child... try renting a dog for a month... damn....
Nov 2005
Penina...
you gotta get ahold of me... gimmie an email back cutelilaznboi@gmail.com when you get the chance... okay?! I don't gots any of your contact info anymore... :(
I miss you!
-Devin
December 2005
Our House 11:12pm
so i'm going to start off by saying that the past couple of weeks have been quite interesting to me... and by that I mean both good and bad times... hah... I know that I haven't writen here for a while, but i'm going to rant and rave about it now.
Thanksgiving was excellent, as both my family and Melvin's family was seen and i'm thankful for that. The house is coming along wonderfully, and although i'm an ass when it comes to doing "house" work for the house i'm trying my best...heh... even though it doensn't always amount to much "sorry Melvin"
I've been ignoring tons of people and i'm not meaning to... really, and I do hope that i'll get the chance to hang out with every-single-one-of-you soon... maybe like... next year... well okay, everyone but sasha and jon... because they may be coming back soon! yay!
anyway, my birthday happened and went away, and I had tons of fun ^_^ in more ways then one...haha... but not as much fun as I have with my guy... yay! were almost at nine months!
whoo hoo!
tada! ^_^ oh and to you Jeff... if and when Melvin and I get married well let you know a year in advance... because i'm holding you to those origami cranes! heh... Muah!
-Devin
whew... done!
January 2005
In with the new.... out with the old...
allright... well I'm still debating on if I should go ahead and take a shower before I go to sleep tonight... or just go ahead and wait till morning when I wake up to get ready for work... i'm not sure exactly how that works... but all I do know is that I should be sleeping right now just as it is... otherwise, i'm going to be pretty tired tomorrow night...
Today was the usual day... for the most part I have to say that things were as usual at Starbucks... it was busy as always, and we were understaffed as always as well. Dinah had come in for a second to talk about some things... but of course she never once helped us out at work... oh well... i'm getting used to it now. Jess and I had kahlua and coffee during work to make things better for us...haha... it was soooo funny and great. I was in the back office helping Jess out with the milk order when Gina came up to me telling me that Andrew was in the store and that I should go ahead and see him... of course I was busy and I never got the chance to see him afterall... I was kinda sad about it because I was really hoping that he was going to message me letting me know that he was on his way instead of surprising me... but he had many other things on his mind... like the thought that he had called about nine other hotels just trying to see if there was a room available... on the last night of his stay here on the Big Island... of course I didn't hear about all of this until today... and I have to say... i'm damn excited about tomorrow now...haha
Feb. 2005
Something came over me last night that made me want to write so much... I started to write it down... and just before I finished typing it out... I realized that it was something that I shouldn't be writing... it was giving away to much of me for all to see... and I knew in the end that it would actually hurt me overall... and so with all that I could bear... I deleted the post... never to be seen again.
I had brunch with dan... it was really nice... to be able to just relax for once and just have a good time... eating no less...haha... the food was good and the company was wonderful as well... so far, Tiffany and Mike, Eric and Sean, and Dan are the ones that I feel as though I will miss the most so far... aside from my family... when I go
Scott too...
which leads me to this topic... me leaving... and where... well so far its going to be Hilo... and allthough i'm not really going to be leaving the island... its the fact that the majority of my family is there and the fact that I will be somewhere that I have never felt uncomfortable around... and I love the people that are there... I'm begining to feel the anxiety... in anticipation of moving there...
I talked to my parents today about the whole thing (which was their idea in the first place). I told them that I had a really good friend that was willing and nice enough to let me be their roomate when I move over... however so far she's not bought on that idea... and would like instead for me to live in my own apartment... and in a way she's right... and in a way its a bummer... but i'm at no point in my life to have the need to make my own decisions...haha.. not in the right state of mind at least. blah
If anything the plan is for me to go into the college world in the fall... seeing as I won't be able to make it by March to turn in all of my applications n stuff... not to mention get myself out of debt and have my record away from my accident and attempted suicide... and all that other stuff... blah
I miss hilo a lot now... I miss my awong family... and I miss most of all the rain... this morning was a wake-up call for that feeling as I awokened with the strongest wind and rain fall that I have seen in a long time... and I loved it... I made it a fact to get up and enjoy it... just because sleeping through it would have been a waste... it doesn't happen very often at all in Kona... and it was my sign that Hilo would be comforting to me... knowing that the wind and rain is there.... and those elements I love so dearly.
I all but have one fear... I know my life... and I know how I am...
I don't want to screw up my gay life there in Hilo... hopefully family there in Hilo (gay family at least) will help me more than the Kona side would ever. ha
i'm looking forward to the drunken nights... yes... and yet all at the same time... i'm really looking forward to the study sessions and the clubs that are there to be offered... mainly GLO... as I can't wait to be completly active in it... I can't wait to speak up my mind and let my Hilo family know that i'm serious about who I am as a gay person! ^_^
of course as all things go... anything can happen from now till then... when I can actually go to college... the hope is that I make it there...
night for now...
-Devin
March 2005
"playing around is what i'm good at"
Well Ex... You couldn't have chosen a bettr quote for yourself other than that... ha
There was a time that I actually thought that if I was to keep his picture that I would soon run into him and he and I would have this wonderful revelation that we really ought to be together... blah... that was today...haha... oh wellz, I've just realized that no matter what happens... that won't happen... its like thinking that Andrew actually considered being with me... haha... even more funny
anyway, I'm not feeling good... and I would really like a cig right now... but i'm trying to be good... however i'm good at being bad as well... ^_^ I've also come to the conclusion that I'm good at what I do... good and bad... and that there will be a balance with both no matter what...
I had to laugh at myself today... I almost fell for it again... I was almost "used" in the normal fasion... slow and painful... "slow" as in the amount of money spent (10,000) over a period of time to collect my ten grand of miles... and the "painful" as in the pain that I would feel watching it and my ex run to Oahu (at my expense), stay in my room "STAY...NO SEX" ((not that i'd want it)) and take off back to Kona without a single thank you... I'm glad that i'm going by myself... i'll have more fun and I'll be able to go again...
I gave Jay the opportunity to let me turn the other way and not even think of being "used" as a possibility... until I told him that it would be nice if he would set-up the time and flight numbers that he would like to board on for the flight... he hasn't called and probably won't call... its too much work for him... or at least thats what I gather... oh well... maybe he'll find his own way to Oahu and i'll see him there... we can party then... i'm not spending a single penny on him right now...
... So I went to Hilo today... it was a lot of fun... I don't care to share the details other than... finding out that Stephen is going to be on Oahu this weekend... from Maui... and so am I! he just called me back to leave me a message that he wants to get together while were both there! hah! we will have our tryst afterall... (wishful thinking of course... it won't happen)....haha... a boy can dream though... can't he
April 2005
allright ladies and gents.... its time for Devin to make yet another updated post... that will probably only last as much as a few sentences... because he can't ever spend the quality time to make a decent post about himself... hah
anyway, I'm in Hilo right now... and at Melvins house. I'm going to be here till either Thursday or Friday... depending on how things work out with time and such... haha... and if Melvin can stand me for that long of time... haha..
ho hum... what to update... what to update...
soooo.... first of all... work has been driving me crazy lately... mainly when I have to work with my two bosses all at the same time... but of course I'm always rambling about that... so i'll move on to other things...
Melvin and I are dating now... so i'm sorry guys... but he's taken ^_^... and so far... all's well... as both his parents and mine both have no quarrels about the whole thing... at least so far ^_^
well... ho hum... I can't really think about what else to write... so i'll take a break and write later... ciao!
-Dev
May 2005
Allright... Mixmeister on? [done!]
Music?? [done!]
Money?? [Bad File!]
...WTF?!!
haha... so yeah, today was a great day! hah... well sorta... I got up eventually... had two conversations on the phone
T-Mobile - I have money (Credit) on my account and everythings all great and wonderful... but I have to wait 2months until they have the ability to send me my check with the credit... bah
HFSFCU - I'm sorry Devin... but you don't have enough collateral.. and soooo a co-signer would be needed... damn!
and so that was my morning... things wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't for the fact that I don't have my cellphone... but i'll have to get back to that one later... in the meantime... I was rushing to Cingular to let Noah know that I've lost my phone and find out what it would take to get another one... soon...
He told me that it would cost me 50bucks to get a replacement phone... and in my eyes that isn't so bad... but when I go ahead and put money into my savings I realize that I really have no money (I gots my 500.00 still... but nothing much else... and the party's coming up!!! damn... so i'm feeling the money scrunch right now...
anyway, I get home and I call Macy's Alamoana.... and after calling them back a half hour later they tell me that they are going to send my phone to my house!!! yay!!! so as far as I now... there will not be a charge... and if thats the case... i'm all good and 50 dollars are still to my name! haha... BUT! because I haven't been working much it just evens out in the long run... or rather I still lose on the financial issue... arg!
damn I miss Melvin... wish he would call me... but oh wait! I don't have a cellphone for him to call now do I?! dammit... arg!
June 2005
I'm spongebob!
well... maybe not exactly... but thats what that cartoon personality test thingy said!!! heh... anyway, ho hum... I miss Melvin... my laptop hasn't come back yet... (fixed hopefully)... I'm still working at Starbucks... I really wanna just sit and read my book (Christopher Rice is awesome!!) and I can't wait to talk to my boyfriend! haha...
I work at 2:30 tomorrow evening... grrr... its only 10:50PM... wheres my boyfriend...
thats it... i'm calling him now... bye!
Sasha i'm counting down the days too!!! hehe... oh, and i'm still mad at both of you guys (you know who you are) for not telling me that you guys were coming back... arg! AND showing up at MY workplace "just like that"...hahaha... just kiddin... i'm fine... really... I just wish that I could really hear you guys... you know... since I was partially deaf all day today... that was great... I still can't hear.... arg!
July 2005
Allright, My Livejournal's yet again paid... and soo.... yet another year of journal entries...
oh... and podcasting rocks!
August 2005
like woah....
weird dreams.... I was doing ballet and I was good at it too!
also, I felt emotionally and physically drained by melvin asking me to do too many things in one day... it was a friday and he was pushing me to do him more favors even though I was telling him that I was tired. Weird... hopefully that doesn't happen to me...or rather to us... as so far things are good and he hasn't been like that so much...
thats all...
Sept 2005
like woah... I haven't posted in such a looooong time! grrr... anyway, lots of stuff happening... but more to come later... for now, i'm packing slowly and i'll soon be off to Hilo! yessss Hilo... moving in with the guy finally! ^_^
cant wait till i'm there! whew!
October 2005
OMFG! so I know I haven't writting in this journal in a bit... but its only because I haven't really had any "alone time" nor do I right now... but I did want to just post a bit while I have the chance... Melvin and I have a baby!... well A baby puppy that is... heh...
However right now I have the job to watch both Harmony (Our puppy) and Mini (Chris' puppy) and they are both driving me mad... both are teaching eachothers bad habbits and now Harmoney doesn't like being left alone in the bathroom... which up to this point was quite fine with her... damn dogs... grrr...
whatever... there, I needed to vent...
oh, and if anybody ever wanted to see what It was sorta like to raise a child... try renting a dog for a month... damn....
Nov 2005
Penina...
you gotta get ahold of me... gimmie an email back cutelilaznboi@gmail.com when you get the chance... okay?! I don't gots any of your contact info anymore... :(
I miss you!
-Devin
December 2005
Our House 11:12pm
so i'm going to start off by saying that the past couple of weeks have been quite interesting to me... and by that I mean both good and bad times... hah... I know that I haven't writen here for a while, but i'm going to rant and rave about it now.
Thanksgiving was excellent, as both my family and Melvin's family was seen and i'm thankful for that. The house is coming along wonderfully, and although i'm an ass when it comes to doing "house" work for the house i'm trying my best...heh... even though it doensn't always amount to much "sorry Melvin"
I've been ignoring tons of people and i'm not meaning to... really, and I do hope that i'll get the chance to hang out with every-single-one-of-you soon... maybe like... next year... well okay, everyone but sasha and jon... because they may be coming back soon! yay!
anyway, my birthday happened and went away, and I had tons of fun ^_^ in more ways then one...haha... but not as much fun as I have with my guy... yay! were almost at nine months!
whoo hoo!
tada! ^_^ oh and to you Jeff... if and when Melvin and I get married well let you know a year in advance... because i'm holding you to those origami cranes! heh... Muah!
-Devin
whew... done!