'Fix You' - mission_insane fic
Title: Fix You
Summary: “You can trust me again, Vala - I promise I won’t let anyone hurt you...I want to protect you…”
Rating: PG
Spoilers/Warnings: Momento Mori, for sure - nothing else that I can think of...
A/N: Written for mission_insane, table 19, prompt 05: Fix Me.
Fix You
Military-issue boots thumped loudly through the halls of the SGC, his own included. The sound of guns being prepared for use, shouted orders from commanders to subordinates, radio chatter - it was all there, like it’d always been in situations like the one he found himself in now.
Yet, he couldn’t hear any of it. Not over the fast-paced pounding of his heart, the rush of blood in his ears. The cold weight of the 9 mil in his hand was more deafening than anything else. After so many years, it had become such a comfort - almost like a friend in itself. With each passing second that he ran down the corridor, nearing his destination, it quickly withered back to being the enemy it had started as.
He stopped, having reached the intended spot, and cast a long glance to the gun in his hand. The enemy that would take his life away from him.
“Jackson!” Mitchell called, breaking through the haze of turmoil and anguish that flooded every limb, every nerve.
Fearful blue eyes rose to meet the stern, commanding pair looking at him. “Yeah?” His voice was soft, almost lost.
Cam softened his look, and reached out to touch his fingers to his friend’s wrist. “You with us?”
Looking back down at the gun, Daniel gave a minute nod. He couldn’t reply with words because words would seem to make it final - the final division between what was duty, and what was life.
“I can’t let you in there if you even doubt for a second you won’t do what needs to be done.”
Daniel winced inwardly at the military-trained clip to Cam’s words. It was just another blow to his already fragile world - the sides had already been drawn, and it seemed everyone was fighting against him.
“Daniel?”
He couldn’t respond to the call.
“Jackson!”
This time he looked up. A world of warring emotions played on Mitchell’s face, and a surge of hope flared in Daniel’s chest as it seemed the friend and not the leader spoke to him.
“Can I let you in there?”
Tightening his grip on his gun, Daniel nodded, this time more adamantly. “You can’t not let me in there.”
With a quick nod, Cam turned back to the airmen awaiting his order. “Blow ‘em.” He commanded, holding the button on his radio so those on the other end could do the same. Everyone turned away abruptly, covering ears, as the massive rounds of explosives blew a hole in the sealed doors.
Instinct took over him even before the all clear was given. Daniel pushed off the wall, and dashed forward, ignoring the shouts that followed him through the hole and into the gate room. He aimed his weapon, another instinct, at the lone figure standing at the top of the ramp, gun wavering between him and everyone else who were coming in behind him.
Daniel stopped at the base of the ramp, and for a moment, felt like the cool and collected soldier he’d become in the recent years - no emotion, no biased feelings. Just doing what he knew was expected of him, what he knew was the ‘right thing’.
“Vala, put the gun down.” He called up to her.
Wild grey eyes turned on him, the gun aiming at him. “So you’re with them now?”
Daniel didn’t even bother to nod, just tightened his grip on his gun. “I’m not with them, Vala. I’m with you, and I want to help you - you’re very sick…”
“You think I don’t know that!” Vala screamed, waving the gun wildly before bringing it back down to point at him. Daniel could practically feel everyone tense behind him.
“Oh that’s right…” She continued, casting a glare toward everyone. “Just shoot the crazed alien woman! Gods forbid she’s your friend and…” She stopped, looking at Daniel again. Something in the look put a crack in the military demeanor. The grip on his weapon loosened a little.
Sam’s voice caused him to flinch slighty. “We are your friends, Vala.” It was almost convincing, if it didn’t sound so damn false to his ears. “We are just trying to help you…”
Up at the top of the ramp, Vala slapped her palm to her forehead and squeezed her eyes shut. Her face contorted in confusion and anguish as she shook her head and ground the heel of her hand just above her left eye. A whine that about brought Daniel to his knees came from her throat.
“You’re lying!” She cried, though never opening her eyes.
“We’re not lying…” Mitchell tried to reassure her.
Vala let out a sob and lowered her gun to her side. “Then why are you aiming guns at me?!” She cried, and though it was crazed and tormented, Daniel heard it. Heard her, his Vala, in the words - she was downright terrified.
The gun in his hand lowered to his side, a sick feeling building in his stomach for letting one instinct control another. Daniel started up the ramp.
The other’s behind him shouted his name in their various ways, and it caused Vala’s eyes to snap open and the gun she held to train on him. He froze and just watched her, ignoring the sounds of his friends trying to get him to come back.
“I’m on your side.” He said with conviction.
She shook her head. “You’re not!”
Daniel knelt down and tossed his gun back down the ramp. It only made the angry shouts increase, but again he ignored them and turned back to her. Holding up his now empty hands, he looked at Vala once more.
“Look, no weapon…” He said softly, taking a step closer and knowing he was now between their weapons and the target, with no way to defend himself. “No backup…Just me. It’s just Daniel.”
Vala blinked, eyes filling with tears. The hand holding the gun on him trembled violently, along with the rest of her body. She shook with sickness and betrayal, and she wanted nothing more than to believe him. But she was confused, and part of her wanted him, while the other part wanted him dead.
“Baby, look at me…” Daniel’s own emotions were coming to the surface at the sight of her struggling. He placed a gentle hand to his chest. “At me…” he emphasized. “I know you’re hurting and I know you’re confused, and that kills me Vala…”
With each slow second that passed, he took another small step closer.
“I can’t take seeing you like this.” He whispered, watching as her bottom lip quivered. “I’ve never been able to, and I’m sorry that I’m one of the causes. I don’t want to shoot you - I don’t want you dead….never.”
Vala was openly crying now, and the room had suddenly gone silent, Daniel realized.
“Remember in the warehouse? Remember when you trusted me to take care of you?” He waited until she nodded. After she did, Daniel ventured a shaky little smile. “You can trust me again, Vala - I promise I won’t let anyone hurt you...I want to protect you…”
He was now just inches from the gun pointed at his chest.
Tears spilled over as he spoke his next words. “You’re my Vala…”
Vala seemed to crumble in on herself at his words. Daniel took the remaining steps to take her in his arms as she began to sink towards the ramp. Carefully lowering her, he pulled her in close to his chest and gently rocked her.
She wrapped one arm around his neck, burying her face in his standard black shirt. The gun lay forgotten on the cold, metal ramp at their sides.
Daniel rested his cheek in her sweat-soaked, matted hair.
“I’m broken, Daniel…” Vala whisper desperately, clutching at the fabric of his green BDU shirt with her free hand. “I’m broken and defective…”
“Then I’m gonna fix you.” Daniel whispered back, wrapping his arms tighter around her shaking body.
Comments and feedback are always appreciated!
Summary: “You can trust me again, Vala - I promise I won’t let anyone hurt you...I want to protect you…”
Rating: PG
Spoilers/Warnings: Momento Mori, for sure - nothing else that I can think of...
A/N: Written for mission_insane, table 19, prompt 05: Fix Me.
Fix You
Military-issue boots thumped loudly through the halls of the SGC, his own included. The sound of guns being prepared for use, shouted orders from commanders to subordinates, radio chatter - it was all there, like it’d always been in situations like the one he found himself in now.
Yet, he couldn’t hear any of it. Not over the fast-paced pounding of his heart, the rush of blood in his ears. The cold weight of the 9 mil in his hand was more deafening than anything else. After so many years, it had become such a comfort - almost like a friend in itself. With each passing second that he ran down the corridor, nearing his destination, it quickly withered back to being the enemy it had started as.
He stopped, having reached the intended spot, and cast a long glance to the gun in his hand. The enemy that would take his life away from him.
“Jackson!” Mitchell called, breaking through the haze of turmoil and anguish that flooded every limb, every nerve.
Fearful blue eyes rose to meet the stern, commanding pair looking at him. “Yeah?” His voice was soft, almost lost.
Cam softened his look, and reached out to touch his fingers to his friend’s wrist. “You with us?”
Looking back down at the gun, Daniel gave a minute nod. He couldn’t reply with words because words would seem to make it final - the final division between what was duty, and what was life.
“I can’t let you in there if you even doubt for a second you won’t do what needs to be done.”
Daniel winced inwardly at the military-trained clip to Cam’s words. It was just another blow to his already fragile world - the sides had already been drawn, and it seemed everyone was fighting against him.
“Daniel?”
He couldn’t respond to the call.
“Jackson!”
This time he looked up. A world of warring emotions played on Mitchell’s face, and a surge of hope flared in Daniel’s chest as it seemed the friend and not the leader spoke to him.
“Can I let you in there?”
Tightening his grip on his gun, Daniel nodded, this time more adamantly. “You can’t not let me in there.”
With a quick nod, Cam turned back to the airmen awaiting his order. “Blow ‘em.” He commanded, holding the button on his radio so those on the other end could do the same. Everyone turned away abruptly, covering ears, as the massive rounds of explosives blew a hole in the sealed doors.
Instinct took over him even before the all clear was given. Daniel pushed off the wall, and dashed forward, ignoring the shouts that followed him through the hole and into the gate room. He aimed his weapon, another instinct, at the lone figure standing at the top of the ramp, gun wavering between him and everyone else who were coming in behind him.
Daniel stopped at the base of the ramp, and for a moment, felt like the cool and collected soldier he’d become in the recent years - no emotion, no biased feelings. Just doing what he knew was expected of him, what he knew was the ‘right thing’.
“Vala, put the gun down.” He called up to her.
Wild grey eyes turned on him, the gun aiming at him. “So you’re with them now?”
Daniel didn’t even bother to nod, just tightened his grip on his gun. “I’m not with them, Vala. I’m with you, and I want to help you - you’re very sick…”
“You think I don’t know that!” Vala screamed, waving the gun wildly before bringing it back down to point at him. Daniel could practically feel everyone tense behind him.
“Oh that’s right…” She continued, casting a glare toward everyone. “Just shoot the crazed alien woman! Gods forbid she’s your friend and…” She stopped, looking at Daniel again. Something in the look put a crack in the military demeanor. The grip on his weapon loosened a little.
Sam’s voice caused him to flinch slighty. “We are your friends, Vala.” It was almost convincing, if it didn’t sound so damn false to his ears. “We are just trying to help you…”
Up at the top of the ramp, Vala slapped her palm to her forehead and squeezed her eyes shut. Her face contorted in confusion and anguish as she shook her head and ground the heel of her hand just above her left eye. A whine that about brought Daniel to his knees came from her throat.
“You’re lying!” She cried, though never opening her eyes.
“We’re not lying…” Mitchell tried to reassure her.
Vala let out a sob and lowered her gun to her side. “Then why are you aiming guns at me?!” She cried, and though it was crazed and tormented, Daniel heard it. Heard her, his Vala, in the words - she was downright terrified.
The gun in his hand lowered to his side, a sick feeling building in his stomach for letting one instinct control another. Daniel started up the ramp.
The other’s behind him shouted his name in their various ways, and it caused Vala’s eyes to snap open and the gun she held to train on him. He froze and just watched her, ignoring the sounds of his friends trying to get him to come back.
“I’m on your side.” He said with conviction.
She shook her head. “You’re not!”
Daniel knelt down and tossed his gun back down the ramp. It only made the angry shouts increase, but again he ignored them and turned back to her. Holding up his now empty hands, he looked at Vala once more.
“Look, no weapon…” He said softly, taking a step closer and knowing he was now between their weapons and the target, with no way to defend himself. “No backup…Just me. It’s just Daniel.”
Vala blinked, eyes filling with tears. The hand holding the gun on him trembled violently, along with the rest of her body. She shook with sickness and betrayal, and she wanted nothing more than to believe him. But she was confused, and part of her wanted him, while the other part wanted him dead.
“Baby, look at me…” Daniel’s own emotions were coming to the surface at the sight of her struggling. He placed a gentle hand to his chest. “At me…” he emphasized. “I know you’re hurting and I know you’re confused, and that kills me Vala…”
With each slow second that passed, he took another small step closer.
“I can’t take seeing you like this.” He whispered, watching as her bottom lip quivered. “I’ve never been able to, and I’m sorry that I’m one of the causes. I don’t want to shoot you - I don’t want you dead….never.”
Vala was openly crying now, and the room had suddenly gone silent, Daniel realized.
“Remember in the warehouse? Remember when you trusted me to take care of you?” He waited until she nodded. After she did, Daniel ventured a shaky little smile. “You can trust me again, Vala - I promise I won’t let anyone hurt you...I want to protect you…”
He was now just inches from the gun pointed at his chest.
Tears spilled over as he spoke his next words. “You’re my Vala…”
Vala seemed to crumble in on herself at his words. Daniel took the remaining steps to take her in his arms as she began to sink towards the ramp. Carefully lowering her, he pulled her in close to his chest and gently rocked her.
She wrapped one arm around his neck, burying her face in his standard black shirt. The gun lay forgotten on the cold, metal ramp at their sides.
Daniel rested his cheek in her sweat-soaked, matted hair.
“I’m broken, Daniel…” Vala whisper desperately, clutching at the fabric of his green BDU shirt with her free hand. “I’m broken and defective…”
“Then I’m gonna fix you.” Daniel whispered back, wrapping his arms tighter around her shaking body.
Comments and feedback are always appreciated!