33 Things Alan Shore Is No Longer Allowed To Do At Crane, Poole & Schmidt

[brad_chase]

I pick up the paper from my office floor - one of at least one hundred strewn, taped and propped within the room:

"I am not allowed to add “In accordance with the prophesy” to the end of answers I give to a question Brad asks me.

Then I see the document on my computer screen. Damn you, Alan:

Comments

[alan_shore]

That's what you think.

[brad_chase]

If we adhere to these, I need to establish consequences.

[alan_shore]

I suggest excommunication. In accordance with the prophesy.

[brad_chase]

You write rules for yourself just for the joy of breaking them, don't you, Alan.

[carolina_stokes]

1. May not list "Dominatrix Services" on his expense account.
2. May not ask the Xerox guy to set the laser printer to "stun".
3. Is not to ask new clients if they would like to step into "his cell".
4. Stop handing out the business cards that say "Agent of Satan" with Brad’s name on it.
5. May not stand on his desk with a handmade sign that says "Union".
6. Do not start depositions out with instructions on what to do if there is a terrorist attack.
7. Do not leave fake letters from Brad to the makers of Viagra on the photocopy machine.
8. Stop sending fan letters from Brad to Queer Eye For The Straight Guy.

[brad_chase]

Business cards? Damn him

[carolina_stokes]

That would be within your realm to do so, as an agent of Satan.

[alan_shore]

I think we all know Brad lacks the mental capacity to play devil's advocate.