Fic: Before Me 10 (Harry Potter, HarryxRon)
Title: Before Me
Fandom: Harry Potter
Words: 3,483
Warnings: None
Rating: PG
Author's Note: Thank you to everyone who has never given up on this story ever being updated. I hope your patience will be rewarded.
Thank you to everyone who has never given up on this story ever being updated. I hope your patience will be rewarded.
Chapter 10
Despite the magical packaging Harry had used, there was no way I was going to risk Floo Powder residue getting into Mum's gift. Fast travel was out. So instead, I opted to go out into the small wooded area beside the apartment complex to apparate to the Burrow. With such high-ranking officials from the ministry attending the party, placing an anti-apparition charm on the Burrow was deemed wise. At the time, I had poked fun of the idea of using our resources on such a thing. I remembered my surprise when Harry leaned towards me to whisper that I was one of those important ministry people I was mocking, and I quickly changed my tune. Although I now agreed with this security measure, that didn't mean I had to like it. Once I'd bundled myself up against the late October weather, I apparated from there to the field a quarter kilometer away.
It was raining when I appeared in the field. It wasn't a heavy rain, but I knew there would be no way I'd arrive at the Burrow dry. I carefully tucked Mum's gift into my coat and swore at my lack of foresight. I completely forgot to ask after the weather. I had expected it to be as cloudy and chilly as it was back in the city. Despite knowing the necessary precautions, I wished the drop-off point had been closer. At least it's not windy, I thought. After making sure the desserts were secured I started the long trek to the house. I hadn't made it far when I spotted a figure under an umbrella.
It took me a moment to realize the figure wasn't stationary, but was in fact were heading straight toward me. Thinking of plenty of defensive spells I placed my hand into my coat pocket, fingering the hilt of my wand. "Oi!" I shouted in warning.
"Oi, yourself!" the figure returned, a spark of amusement laced in their tone.
I relaxed the hold on my wand. "Good lord, Hermione, I almost hexed you." I smiled widely when she reached me. She was wearing a black raincoat with the hood up, but I spotted the tale-tell signs of the humidity making her hair frizz uncontrollably.
"I'm sure you'd try." My best friend replied as she opened the umbrella and held it out to me. "Thought you'd need this."
I took it, grateful for her preparedness. "Thanks, 'Mione. Your timing is perfect."
"Harry arrived not long ago so I knew it wouldn't be long before you popped up." She replied simply.
Hermione walked passed me to the edge of the anti-apparition border. Pulling out her own wand and with a practiced wave and a muttered spell, she conjured an umbrella stand full of umbrellas for any other guests caught in the rain.
"So, I'm not the only one running late, huh?"
"In fact, you are not," she confirmed with a laugh. In another moment there was a shimmer of magic cast over the stand. My best guess was a water-repelling charm, which was a smart touch. With a satisfied expression on his face, Hermione turned to me and motioned for me to follow her back to the Burrow.
For a while, the only sound was the swish of our shoes trudging through the damp grasses as we walked in companionable silence.
We were almost at the house when Hermione asked, "What did you end up making?"
I looked down to see that my coat had fallen away from Mum's gift. Looking back to Hermione I failed to contain the uncertainty in my grin. "Despite my super impressive learning curve, I couldn't settle on which dessert to make her I ended up with several." I focused on the gift and took a breath trying my best to hold back from voicing my concerns. I blew it out a moment later. "There's chocolate tortes, and a blueberry cheesecake, some lemon meringue bars and mini custard tarts, oh, and a blackberry-apple crumble, and a, uh, treacle tart."
"Of course," Hermione laughed at the large random selection.
"What?"
"Treacle tart, Harry's favorite," she smiled knowingly up at me.
"Hey, I made yours, too," I countered. I wasn't sure if she could tell that I had only added the cheesecake to hide the fact that I was making Harry's favorite.
"True, but let me ask you one thing. Was there a treacle recipe in your mother's cookbook?"
Busted. But there were several reasons why I added Harry's favorite. Not only was it fun to watch his glee at learning how to make the tart, but I wasn't sure how he was going to be around Ginny, and what his reaction would be when she kept her promise to me and told Harry about her renewed relationship with Dean Thomas. I hoped he'd not turn to the bottle to cope and drink himself into a stupor tonight, but if that happened having the dessert handy all but ensured he wouldn't drink on an empty stomach.
"So sue me. I wanted to make sure he would eat something he liked."
Hermione laughed at my defense and it was still one of my favorite sounds in the world. If I wasn't so selfishly and completely in love with Harry I would have spent my whole life at her side making sure she had reasons to laugh like that. Luckily for us, she had Neville who made her laugh these days.
"What?"
"It's just...the way you care about him. It's cute. I can't wait to see how excited he'll get when he sees it."
"Oh, come off it," I said playfully nudging her arm with my elbow. "There won't be any excitement. He already knows. We made it together."
"That's a shame. It's funny, in a tragic kind of way, watching you two dance around each other."
I stopped walking. "And what's that's supposed to mean?"
Hermione continued on, her hand was on the latch of the Burrow's front gate when she scoffed in that way of hers which meant I was missing something obvious. "Nothing, Ronald. Forget I said anything."
"No, that's not nothing."
She hummed and shrugged like she agreed with me, but didn't care to apologize for her comments. I jogged after her, my curiosity causing me to refuse to drop it.
"Hermione, what the hell?"
Hermione pursed her lips and huffed out of her nose as she took a moment to gather herself. "Did you think I can't see how much you love him?
I nodded, my grip on the umbrella handle tightening as anxiety bloomed in my stomach.
Her expression softened as she picked up on my rising panic. "Or that I know you worry like crazy if I would have a problem with the way you love?"
I was starting to see what she was getting at and was regretting making her explain herself. Ginny's words had been playing and replaying in my head ever since she told me Harry not only had feelings for me but that I was probably the only one who could make him happy in the way he craved to be. I couldn't meet her eyes and I knew that that was telling enough.
Hermione groaned with frustration. "I would be insulted by that if I didn't understand where it was coming from because there was a time when I did have a problem with it. It's not for the reason you think," she quickly added. "It wasn't because you liked men, it was because I still wanted you to look at me the way you've always looked at him."
"I'm sorry." Man, I really wanted a cigarette. My nerves felt like they were snapping apart.
The rain had stopped without my notice and Hermione collapsed her umbrella. With a flick of her hand, she gestured for mine, too. "This isn't where I wanted to have this conversation. I don't want to get into everything now. How about we table this for tonight and I promise to come over tomorrow and we'll really hash it out? Do you think you could do that?"
The desire to deny her and get into it right here, right now was strong. I was growing tired of having to tip-toe through every conversation that surrounded me and Harry. I'd rather rage, and maybe even cry, releasing all my worry and stress at once. But that was childish and Hermione didn't deserve to be treated that way just because she was unlucky enough to be in front of me when I felt this way. Plus, I wanted to know more about her thoughts on everything. So, handing over my umbrella for her to close I answered her.
"What'd you get Mum?"
For a wild moment, I thought Hermione was going to cry, her relief was so grand. "A bottle of Monsieur Matthieu's best red. Fleur recommended it."
To say that Mum loved her gift from me would be an understatement. She cooed over the variety, stating how proud she was of my sudden baking skills and how touched she was that I'd used the family's recipes. I was feeling better at the praise until the Twins' unveiled their birthday prank. It turned out to be a potion that made food taste like the drinker's favorite desserts. That revelation coupled with my gift of an assortment of desserts made me look complicit in their scheme. I should have been mad but everyone seemed to enjoy testing to see how well the potion worked. It didn't take long for it to quickly devolve into an impromptu game where everyone tried to see what sweets my gift tasted like.
"Oh, it's the same," Hermione said in delight, biting into her piece of blueberry cheesecake.
I looked around for Harry. I wanted to know if when he drank the Twins' potion the treacle tart would also taste the same to him. I made it to the den where Harry was being pulled into a huge hug from Mum. "Oh, my stars, Harry, what a lovely gift! Thank you, sweetie."
"You're welcome, Molly," Harry said with the usual hesitation of calling her by her first name to her face. When they parted I was able to see what the thing Harry had to check on was. There on a small square table sat the most beautiful gramophone I've ever seen. The gramophone's brass horn had intricate designs swirled on it and shone in the light. It was new. It had to have been expensive.
An adorable blush covered Harry's face. He looked embarrassed but pleased that his gift was received so well. Our eyes met and I sent him a nod. Harry's blush deepened and he looked away. Curious, I started towards Harry in order to speak to him when there was a bright flash of light and charge in the room I craned my head in search of the source and spotted Ginny emerging from the fireplace.
"There's my girl!" Molly exclaimed with joy.
"Hi, Mum. Happy birthday," she greeted handing over a small stack of vinyl records tied together in a thick gold ribbon. It paired with Harry's gift so well that the gramophone must have been ordered when he and Ginny were still together.
"Thank you, my sweet girl," Mum said, pulling Ginny into a great hug. "This is perfect. Do you see what Harry got us?"
Harry and Ginny shared a look and the tension between them was too much for me.
I backed out of the room and went into the garden hoping to sneak in a quick cigarette. I was already on edge after Hermione's earlier admission and I knew I didn't have the strength to handle watching Harry and Ginny's reunion. Out of sight, I crouched behind the big oak tree between the flower beds at the far end of the garden. The oak's canopy had blocked the rain leaving a dry spot perfect for me to enjoy a smoke in private. Placing the cigarette into my mouth I reached into my pocket to pull out my lighter when I heard voices not too far from me. Thinking I was caught, I stood up and was starting to make my way into view, thinking up excuses when I heard Harry yell.
"WHAT!?"
I ducked back down. That hadn't sounded like Harry meant that for me, but something was up.
Ginny was gesticulating wildly. She was finally telling Harry how she had moved on. Maybe she was even doing a rehash of the speech she'd given me only days ago. By the way his shoulders were hiked up to his ears, he wasn't happy about what he was hearing. Her voice was hushed but urgent. I wished I had some extendable ears so I would know exactly what was being said. Instead, I crept towards the flower beds and squatted behind a rose bush, not caring that I was getting wet by rainfall.
"I know you're upset," Ginny said carefully. "You have every right to be. And I don't expect you to forgive me instantly. That's going to take time and effort on my part until we're okay again. But... maybe now- now you'll be able to go after who you want."
"I don't-"
"Please," Ginny scoffed, cutting Harry off. "You've been in love with Ron way longer than you ever were with me."
"This again," Harry spat. Harry's voice made my stomach twist.
I pushed past the discomfort so I wouldn't give away my position, though I almost did so anyway at Harry's next words.
"Yeah, okay, I'm crazy about him," he confessed, throwing his arms up in exasperation. "But you know I'd never do anything about it. I can't. Ron's...well, Ron is Ron. Besides, this is about us. We had plans. Things we wanted to do. Things that aren't something Ron and I could ever make."
But Ginny wasn't having it. "Of course, it's about you and him."
"It's really not-"
"It sure the hell is when he feels the same way!"She stated, crossing her arms over her chest.
"What?" Harry all but snarled at her. I shuddered at the venom he'd been able to conjure in that one word. I wished I could see his face.
"Ron doesn't..." Harry blew out a breath. "He can't, not that way. I would know..."
The disappointment in Harry's voice was breaking me. I longed to hold him, to apologize for me being me and the way I am, but revealing myself at this point would most likely backfire. This wasn't a Muggle rom-com where I could pop up and declare my undying love and Harry would jump into my arms and the music would swell and we'd share the kiss that would end all kisses. Most likely Harry would jinx me out of reflex and then run away and avoid me for the rest of my life. I wisely stayed put. Plus, I was feeling a little pissed that Ginny had outed me like that. Not cool.
"You don't know dick, Harry. Don't laugh," she warned. "You don't know what it's like to look at someone and know that you'd have a better time if you were with someone else. And it sucks knowing that they're in the same boat. You don't want me, not anymore. Not in a long time. The worst thing is you don't even realize it. When we fought over you coming to live with me that's when I knew that things wouldn't change between us. That we wouldn't be able to go on. I can't be with someone who would stay with me because they can't be honest with themselves. It's not right. To me or for you."
It took Harry a long moment to reply to her. "I do care about you."
"I know," she conceded. "But it's not enough, is it?"
Harry shook his head.
"Now knowing that, can you really stand there and tell me what you want to be with me and start our own family?"
Harry looked devastated at the truth of it. "No."
Ginny nodded like that was the answer she was expecting. She stepped forward and pulled him into a hug. "Go. Be with him. Make each other happy." Ginny said, giving Harry her blessing.
I watched their embrace end and my heart nearly exploded as Harry practically ran back into the house.
When Ginny was alone, she sighed. "You can come out now, Ron," she said looking right at my hiding spot.
Surprised I sprang up. "How did you know I was there?"
"I saw your head pop up and I am pretty sure Mum isn't growing orange roses."
"Oh, right," I said with as much dignity as I could muster as I moved towards her.
"Sorry for outting you like that."
I pulled her into a tight hug. She squeezed back.
"It's fine," I murmured dismissively into her hair. "Thank you for keeping your promise."
"Yeah."
"Are you going to be okay?"
"I have Dean," she said as if that explained it all. In a way, I guess it did. "He's looking for you."
"Dean?" I asked jokingly. "Don't tell me he wants me too?"
"Jackass," Ginny said, hiccupping a laugh into my chest.
I chuckled in response and pulled back to get a good look at her. Exhaustion plagued her body language, but there was a spark in her eyes.
"It'll be okay if you want to leave."
Ginny blew out a breath. "Yeah?"
"Yeah. I'll make your excuses."
"Thanks, but I want to stay. I just...I just need a minute."
I was proud that was her answer. "I love you, little sister."
"I love you, too, big brother."
We hugged once more before breaking apart. As much as I'd like to make certain Ginny was alright, I was itching to get to Harry. My eagerness must have been apparent as Ginny shoved me towards the house. Her silent encouragement meant the world to me.
"Oi, Ron!" Ginny called after me. I turned when she got my attention. "I told you so!"
I shook my head and waved her off. "Yeah, yeah."
The sweeping tones of a waltz glided throughout the house when I returned. Someone had put a record on. The music beckoned me and I went into the den to check for Harry. He wasn't there. Instead, I found Bill and Feur pressed together expertly twirling around the furniture lost in their own world.
There was an excited commotion of applause coming from the living room and I followed the sound, hoping to spot the man I loved. Most of the party was standing around Neville as he presented his gift to my mum. In the center of the room, a large plant rested on the coffee table. I could hear Neville describing how it was a flowering plant of his own making and how it bloomed brilliant blossoms of all shades of purple for an entire month before hibernating for a year. I saw Hermione beaming with pride and love as Neville explained how he had been perfecting his gift for over six months to create one that would bloom during November, starting tonight. The first signs of it blooming were already happening. Many of the party-goers ooh'd and ahh'd and clapped as they witnessed the first and the most brilliant bloom of the plant's cycle.
While everyone was enjoying Neville's birthday present for Molly, I found Harry in the kitchen, helping himself to a piece of treacle tart. His face flushed and his eyes widened at the sight of me as if he was hoping this wouldn't be happening tonight. But I was done. I had reached my limit and wouldn't play this silent game anymore.
"Harry," I said cornering him against the kitchen counter. "We need to talk."