....aaaaaaaand a rant.
Sorry to flood f-lists, but I have to get this out somewhere. Cut, though, to save your time if you're not interested.
So, Tom has been living with us since about January now. He helped pick up some of the slack when John flaked out on Jamie and I, which I appreciate. He helped us find Sonoma, who is a friendly and useful roommate, which I appreciate. He is no longer living on the floor in the living room, which I really appreciate. But, past paying rent, for all intents and purposes he does nothing at all that could be considered useful.
In the week or so preceding the signing of a new lease, the four of us discussed the responsibilities each of us would have in maintaining the apartment, beyond rent. Sonoma agreed to do dishes; Jamie agreed to do basic cleaning and take out the trash; I agreed to do laundry; Tom agreed to do the grocery shopping and cooking.
For the most part, we have held to that agreement. The dishes do eventually get done, when Sonoma has a day off of work, which is sporadic but not infrequent. I do laundry twice a week; though I don't always do all of it on any one day, I take care of the pressing issues. When the garbage can gets full, Jamie takes care of it, usually before it starts smelling and getting fruit flies. Tom.... cooks maybe once every two weeks, and gets groceries about that often. We had agreed that he would provide dinner around 3 every weekday, so that it would be ready before I left for work and when Jamie was just getting home. Doesn't happen.
He was also meant to be responsible for cleaning the messes he makes when he cooks. The stove and microwave are regularly covered in grime, tomato sauce, grease... whatever he has made recently. Sonoma usually ends up being the one who, when she goes in to do dishes, wipes down counters and the stove. His excuse for not cooking more often is that the pans are all dirty. We all want to smack him for this, because he has a propensity to use every single pan he can get away with one day, and then brandish this excuse for the rest of the week. Sonoma has repeatedly told him to let her know when he needs a pan, and she will happily clean it for him so that food can be made. Tom continues to use the same excuse anyway.
The real reason that more cooking doesn't get done is that Tom is rarely AWAKE in time to have food ready at three o'clock. Please believe me that this is no exaggeration. He claims that if he gets up earlier than about 1 (and it is more often 2 or later), it throws off his sleep schedule. Tom works from five to midnight 4 days a week. There is nothing to prevent him from going to bed at 3, getting 8 hours of sleep, and waking up at 11 to get something productive done with his day. I can understand being a night owl; I am one. I still wake up by 11 nearly every day, usually by 10 on at least Mondays and Thursdays, in time to get plenty of laundry done, as is my job.
Tom does nothing around the apartment. When he actually does wake up, all he ever does is either watch TV, read a rule book for whatever game has currently caught his attention, or (especially this one) paint his game models. I can understand having a passion for one's hobby. At the same time, Tom never wants to do anything else. He has to be hounded and coerced to leave the apartment for any reason other than to go to the game store, which sucks for Sonoma, because she wants to do things that involve some social interaction with people who are not her roommates.
Tom's job is, as I mentioned, the night shift at a gas station 20 minutes away. Since Tom no longer has a car (the one he had was a fixer-upper sports car, and not even a good one once fixed up, because it quit running), he depends on Jamie to get him to and from work four days a week. This takes an enormous toll on Jamie in terms of gas money, but Tom has long since quit giving him money for gas. In addition, he has stopped asking when he needs a ride. He packs up his stuff to go wherever, be it work or the game store, and then tells Jamie: "I need you to take me to the game store." Jamie is pissed off with this to the point where he has stopped giving Tom rides anywhere but work. If Tom can't take the moment or two to ask if Jamie is busy first, or if he would mind, he really has no right to expect anything. Especially if he isn't contributing to gas money.
And, though his almighty "sleep schedule" revolves around his job, Tom constantly complains about how much he hates working there. He hates dealing with customers. When asked why he doesn't try to find a different one, he says he's looking; but when asked where he's applied, he'll tell you that he hasn't applied to a lot of places lately, because he is never awake and not at work/the game store when other places are open. He says that it would mess with his sleep schedule to wake up at (God forbid) 11 o'clock and go apply at a few places. So he keeps whining and bitching about his job, while doing nothing to even try and make the situation better. In a couple of different instances, people he knows have gotten him interviews. When this happens, I have literally seen him wear a shirt with huge holes in it and pants that are missing the button to an interview. I know he has clothing without holes, especially since Sonoma has been buying him things. He just chooses not to wear them, comes off as a slob, and therefore has no shot in hell of getting a new job.
On Saturday, Jamie, Sonoma, and I were all running around in the kitchen and elsewhere, trying to get things cleaned and food baked for the Halloween party. Tom got a pass, because his mother was moving from an outlying town into Urbana, and she needed his help moving furniture. When Tom got back that evening, though, he was talking about how he and his brother had been up to the game store, and the guy Jamie sold it to hadn't gotten a book Tom ordered yet, which had forced him to buy a different one. I swear, we were all ready to throttle the little asshat at that moment. Only the idea of blood smears all over our newly shampooed carpet prevented us. Then, when we were finally cleaning up the kitchen and people were beginning to arrive, Tom was asked to help rinse dishes. He made a nominal effort and then disappeared. When Jamie came in and asked where he was, neither Sonoma nor I had any idea. Ben, who had arrived early and was helping with dishes, said he was in the living room watching the movie we had on. The look on Jamie's face, the swears he was obviously trying not to say, were frankly pretty fearsome.
So, really, I think we've all nearly reached the ends of our respective ropes with Tom. Although the lease was signed in April, I am already counting down the days until Jamie and I can look into a place of our own that doesn't involve do-nothing lazy-assed roommates who make more work for the rest of us. I don't want to make the situation worse by going ahead and blowing up in Tom's face. I know that it won't produce any positive results if I do, so I keep it to myself or come off as a whiner to Jamie.
Thankfully, now that both Jamie and I are working good jobs, there is some hope for us being able to strike out on our own when the end of the lease rolls around. I am just trying to bite my tongue and not explode until that day comes.
So, Tom has been living with us since about January now. He helped pick up some of the slack when John flaked out on Jamie and I, which I appreciate. He helped us find Sonoma, who is a friendly and useful roommate, which I appreciate. He is no longer living on the floor in the living room, which I really appreciate. But, past paying rent, for all intents and purposes he does nothing at all that could be considered useful.
In the week or so preceding the signing of a new lease, the four of us discussed the responsibilities each of us would have in maintaining the apartment, beyond rent. Sonoma agreed to do dishes; Jamie agreed to do basic cleaning and take out the trash; I agreed to do laundry; Tom agreed to do the grocery shopping and cooking.
For the most part, we have held to that agreement. The dishes do eventually get done, when Sonoma has a day off of work, which is sporadic but not infrequent. I do laundry twice a week; though I don't always do all of it on any one day, I take care of the pressing issues. When the garbage can gets full, Jamie takes care of it, usually before it starts smelling and getting fruit flies. Tom.... cooks maybe once every two weeks, and gets groceries about that often. We had agreed that he would provide dinner around 3 every weekday, so that it would be ready before I left for work and when Jamie was just getting home. Doesn't happen.
He was also meant to be responsible for cleaning the messes he makes when he cooks. The stove and microwave are regularly covered in grime, tomato sauce, grease... whatever he has made recently. Sonoma usually ends up being the one who, when she goes in to do dishes, wipes down counters and the stove. His excuse for not cooking more often is that the pans are all dirty. We all want to smack him for this, because he has a propensity to use every single pan he can get away with one day, and then brandish this excuse for the rest of the week. Sonoma has repeatedly told him to let her know when he needs a pan, and she will happily clean it for him so that food can be made. Tom continues to use the same excuse anyway.
The real reason that more cooking doesn't get done is that Tom is rarely AWAKE in time to have food ready at three o'clock. Please believe me that this is no exaggeration. He claims that if he gets up earlier than about 1 (and it is more often 2 or later), it throws off his sleep schedule. Tom works from five to midnight 4 days a week. There is nothing to prevent him from going to bed at 3, getting 8 hours of sleep, and waking up at 11 to get something productive done with his day. I can understand being a night owl; I am one. I still wake up by 11 nearly every day, usually by 10 on at least Mondays and Thursdays, in time to get plenty of laundry done, as is my job.
Tom does nothing around the apartment. When he actually does wake up, all he ever does is either watch TV, read a rule book for whatever game has currently caught his attention, or (especially this one) paint his game models. I can understand having a passion for one's hobby. At the same time, Tom never wants to do anything else. He has to be hounded and coerced to leave the apartment for any reason other than to go to the game store, which sucks for Sonoma, because she wants to do things that involve some social interaction with people who are not her roommates.
Tom's job is, as I mentioned, the night shift at a gas station 20 minutes away. Since Tom no longer has a car (the one he had was a fixer-upper sports car, and not even a good one once fixed up, because it quit running), he depends on Jamie to get him to and from work four days a week. This takes an enormous toll on Jamie in terms of gas money, but Tom has long since quit giving him money for gas. In addition, he has stopped asking when he needs a ride. He packs up his stuff to go wherever, be it work or the game store, and then tells Jamie: "I need you to take me to the game store." Jamie is pissed off with this to the point where he has stopped giving Tom rides anywhere but work. If Tom can't take the moment or two to ask if Jamie is busy first, or if he would mind, he really has no right to expect anything. Especially if he isn't contributing to gas money.
And, though his almighty "sleep schedule" revolves around his job, Tom constantly complains about how much he hates working there. He hates dealing with customers. When asked why he doesn't try to find a different one, he says he's looking; but when asked where he's applied, he'll tell you that he hasn't applied to a lot of places lately, because he is never awake and not at work/the game store when other places are open. He says that it would mess with his sleep schedule to wake up at (God forbid) 11 o'clock and go apply at a few places. So he keeps whining and bitching about his job, while doing nothing to even try and make the situation better. In a couple of different instances, people he knows have gotten him interviews. When this happens, I have literally seen him wear a shirt with huge holes in it and pants that are missing the button to an interview. I know he has clothing without holes, especially since Sonoma has been buying him things. He just chooses not to wear them, comes off as a slob, and therefore has no shot in hell of getting a new job.
On Saturday, Jamie, Sonoma, and I were all running around in the kitchen and elsewhere, trying to get things cleaned and food baked for the Halloween party. Tom got a pass, because his mother was moving from an outlying town into Urbana, and she needed his help moving furniture. When Tom got back that evening, though, he was talking about how he and his brother had been up to the game store, and the guy Jamie sold it to hadn't gotten a book Tom ordered yet, which had forced him to buy a different one. I swear, we were all ready to throttle the little asshat at that moment. Only the idea of blood smears all over our newly shampooed carpet prevented us. Then, when we were finally cleaning up the kitchen and people were beginning to arrive, Tom was asked to help rinse dishes. He made a nominal effort and then disappeared. When Jamie came in and asked where he was, neither Sonoma nor I had any idea. Ben, who had arrived early and was helping with dishes, said he was in the living room watching the movie we had on. The look on Jamie's face, the swears he was obviously trying not to say, were frankly pretty fearsome.
So, really, I think we've all nearly reached the ends of our respective ropes with Tom. Although the lease was signed in April, I am already counting down the days until Jamie and I can look into a place of our own that doesn't involve do-nothing lazy-assed roommates who make more work for the rest of us. I don't want to make the situation worse by going ahead and blowing up in Tom's face. I know that it won't produce any positive results if I do, so I keep it to myself or come off as a whiner to Jamie.
Thankfully, now that both Jamie and I are working good jobs, there is some hope for us being able to strike out on our own when the end of the lease rolls around. I am just trying to bite my tongue and not explode until that day comes.