I think he is burning dinner at this moment. Considering what I've just told him about Debbie, I'll have to eat the burned crap, no matter how awful it may be.
Oh Brian. You are really such a sweetie. Even though you will hate me calling you that. I know you didn't want to hurt Michael so you let Debbie convince you. I hope Justin isn't be angry, he should know that you really do try to make others happy even if you pretend otherwise.
I guess I shouldn't be posting to you right now - (I am slightly the worse for a bottle of wine) but I think that you are very kind to everyone with little recognition (except for Justin, of course). I am sure JR will win over your and Justin's affections. Be thankful she is 3 and not in the terrible twos. lol.
Ignore the above, too much wine. I am cold sober this morning and my suggestion is that you and Justin have to put up a united front. It doesn't matter if it is yes or no but you had better get on the same page. If you think that your relationship with Justin is more important than your friendship with Michael (and as his partner it should be)then decide together and stick to it together. Your friendship with Michael although important MUST take second place to your relationship with Justin so you need to make this decision together. It is not fair for you to take all the blame and it is equally not fair for Justin to take all of the blame either, so make a joint decision and go to Michael with it and present it together so no blame can be placed on only one of you. After 22 years of marriage, I have learned that presenting the united front with your partner is one of the most important things that you can do for your relationship.
You know, Brian, maybe it's the fact I had a migraine this a.m., but your castigation of "poor widdle Justy" seems kind of incomprensible to me, since you're berating him for not acting like an equal partner and mature individual when you negotiated a potential deal without him, and then made him responsible for the emotional consequences of signing off or canceling it.
OTOH, I suppose you're hardly going to suddenly get used to consulting anyone else where the Novotnys are concerned, esp. since you're hardly a master of emotion negotiation, and it's much easier to just give in and/or give the power over to your partner who actually is more adept at such. The insult may be a defensive posture. But I think you may be shooting yourself in the foot on this one.
I thought he'd go along with it. He's the caretaking one, no matter what he says, he ENJOYS all the emotional family shit and organizing things and taking care of everybody.
But even so, I did give him the opportunity to say no. I did not commit to Debbie, I said I'd talk to J and get back to her. So yeah, Deb would assume J might be the bad guy, but the fucking truth is, in this situation he should take responsibility for being the bad guy. What's wrong with that?
Since J's emphasis is always EQUAL PARTNERS, why shouldn't he be equal partners in the bad stuff too?
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I guess I shouldn't be posting to you right now - (I am slightly the worse for a bottle of wine) but I think that you are very kind to everyone with little recognition (except for Justin, of course). I am sure JR will win over your and Justin's affections. Be thankful she is 3 and not in the terrible twos. lol.
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Hope you get this resolved soon. Hugs.
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JR could not win my affection. I hate toddlers. Except for Gus when he was that age. And Justin, the night we met.
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I definitely think Justin's remarks were out of line and bordered whiney but now it's time to show him how to "be a man" and "an equal partner".
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OTOH, I suppose you're hardly going to suddenly get used to consulting anyone else where the Novotnys are concerned, esp. since you're hardly a master of emotion negotiation, and it's much easier to just give in and/or give the power over to your partner who actually is more adept at such. The insult may be a defensive posture. But I think you may be shooting yourself in the foot on this one.
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But even so, I did give him the opportunity to say no. I did not commit to Debbie, I said I'd talk to J and get back to her. So yeah, Deb would assume J might be the bad guy, but the fucking truth is, in this situation he should take responsibility for being the bad guy. What's wrong with that?
Since J's emphasis is always EQUAL PARTNERS, why shouldn't he be equal partners in the bad stuff too?
I don't think I am wrong.
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You're not wrong in that.
I think you were wrong with the "poor widdle Justy" crack, though.
But I apologize - I think I must have misread what you told Deb - migraines do that.
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