Thursday

[brian_pa]

Since Justin and Lady Jane fucked up the other thread, here's a new place.

One rule: No smoking. Or discussion of smoking. Or list of smoking-related diseases. Or personal endorsements of The Patch and that fucking gum shit.

Otherwise, knock yourselves out.

Comments

[lady_jane]

Since Justin and Lady Jane fucked up the other thread,

That was definitely a 3-way; we all equally participated in the fuckery. And really, you were the primary baiter. As Justin said, Don't encourage him! *innocent bambi eyes*

Or personal endorsements of The Patch

The patch is for pussies pansies... Good lord, isn't there a way to be alliterative without engaging in belittling language?

Anyway, cold turkey or nothing!!

One rule: No smoking.

No problem.

I'm not discussing, I'm observing.

[furriboots]

Just read the latest post. Do I detect a little bit of the green eyed monster in Justin's tone. Doesn't seem like he is too enamoured by your latest client. Interesting that you knew he was out but Justin didn't. Maybe Roger wanted it that way?

[furriboots]

I think you screwed up this time, Brian

[furriboots]

I have to tell you that I am usually one of your biggest fans and will forgive almost anything you do BUT this time I am a little angry that you have hurt Justin. This could have been avoided if you would only just layout what you each expect from this relationship what ever you want to call it and then compromise until at least some of both of your needs are met.

I hope you can resolve this Brian. I hate to see you and Justin upset with each other.

[furriboots]

I just read your latest post and Brian, you make me feel very sad.

I can't stay angry with you because I know you somehow don't really get the whole emotional thing and I know that you really do love Justin in your way.

Do what you need to do to make this right with Justin. If you want to talk the bitches are here (and I promise NOT to berate you). I do think that you have been judging Roger by your standards which is probably not a great idea since very few people tend to be able to differentiate sex from love. (or at least attraction)

It is interesting that you were looking for friendship with Roger. Sounds like that you may need a friend other than Michael or Justin but I think you would be "safer" choosing either a women or a straight man as a friend to avoid these relationship complications in the future.

I know you would say that you are too tough and don't need it but HUGS you anyway.

[jans_intentions]

The whole thing with Roger reads kind of vibey. I mean, are you considering doing him? Maybe before Justin you might have, but would you now do a client? And what about the fact he knows Justin and might be jealous of him?

Hmmmmm.

*awaits further developments*

[minkprisoner]

You might prefer some anti-smoking lecture to this but...

Brian, you must know that J is feeling insecure and saying that if anything else happens you will get his permission with your patented brand of sarcasm and, not that it would, but you quite like Roger wanting to f you. You must know this playing with fire on a number of levels - if it is a repeat, it becomes something more, he is a client after all and is it really worth it when things are going so well between you? End lecture.

[brian_pa]

Yes, I liked Roger wanting to fuck. But it's not something I "need" and it is completely over now.

Deeper waters

[jans_intentions]

What happens tonight between you and Justin, you know, isn't really the big picture. I think you need to talk about your tricking rules

[lady_jane]

Hey, Brian, just asking for clarification re: what you told Justin as to Nothing is going on with Roger. Or Jasper. Not since the retreat, okay?

So, I just wanted to ask: Was it a 3-way? Okay, I know, MYOB.

More to the point. So. You messed around with guy(s) you actually like, and probably admire, with whom you have a lot in common, who can do and have done a lot for you, so the admiration's mutual. And at least one of them has your private number, so you guys can chat for more than just business.

Wow.

[lady_jane]

Hm, well, reading your posts over at the comm, I'm feeling really bad for both of you guys.

Although I guess I can understand how you feel. Seems that a part of you is seriously rebelling against the settled nature of your current situation.

Maybe you can think about what to do to combat those feelings without thoughtlessly going off the deep end?

Well, anyway, ignore my comments here. I'm sure you've had enough negativity to deal with, and actually I feel pretty bad for you. It's interesting, because you're such a whizz at so many other things. But so clueless about this stuff. I just find it kind of unfathomable that you didn't see this coming with this Roger character.

[brian_pa]

I'm starting to doubt my own motives with Roger. It seemed clear cut, just business talk and joking around about sex (with no intention on my side of going there but he didn't know that).

I am perfectly clear that it had NOTHING to do with Justin or hurting him in any way. But I did like Roger as a person, which was a big mistake, I see that now. So it's finished.

For the record, I am not concerned about being "settled." Christ almighty, I own a hammock AND a BBQ grill. I am only concerned with the ownership of my cock. I can't get past that, somehow.

[lady_jane]

Oh, good god, Brian, you are such a fucking extremist.

But I did like Roger as a person, which was a big mistake, I see that now. So it's finished.

That is NOT a mistake, for god's sake! And that was certainly not what Justin was saying. It isn't how you feel, or even wanting to have someone in your life that expands the boundaries of your social field - it's the ambiguous nature of mixing sexual signals with an emotional connection.

Aren't you the first to say friendship and sex don't mix? Or has that gotten a bit confused because you've become good friends with Justin as well as his lover? There is nothing wrong with flirting, either, as long as the boundaries are VERY clearly recognized - and the big issue I had with this was that Roger wouldn't understand those boundaries - and that you might stumble into emotional + sexual feelings you didn't expect for someone else - it happens.

Your feelings aren't wrong - in fact, they seem to be pretty healthy. Don't jump off the deep end and blame yourself for everything; Justin was

[shadownyc]

If Roger was a trick, that would be the end of it. But now you say Roger is a friend.

A fuck + a friend = a fuck-buddy.

I definitely think Justin has something to be upset about.

[brian_pa]

Roger was not a fuck buddy. We never fucked. But he was a kind of buddy, which was a mistake. I'll take care of that.