Revisiting Brian, Chapter 4
I'm back and here's another chapter. Let me know if you like it, or not. More to follow. Ran
THIS IS INTENDED FOR ADULTS AGE 21 OR OLDER. SEXUAL SITUATIONS. DO NOT OPEN IF YOU ARE NOT 21.
PITTSBURGH, 8PM
Brian often brought clients to the bar called “Sinatra”. Leather booths, floor to ceiling walls of glass that overlooked the city, and gleaming blood wood floors gave it a sleek modern look while the live music was strictly retro. Attractive wait staff served decadent martinis, and the noise level was low enough that a conversation could be held. Brian would never come here for fun. The crowd was mostly straight and boring but it was a good venue for conducting business.
A particular waitress knew him well and had learned there was no use flirting with the handsome executive. Either he was faithfully married, or he was gay. She lost on both bets. His gorgeous companion, however, was fertile ground and she gave Stefan Bonnevier her best push. He, too, was apparently disinterested. Disappointed, she put down their second round of dirty vodka martinis and moved on to hunt among more willing prey.
In the dim light, Bonnevier’s sculpted facial bones were almost skeletal, but the fjord blue mist of his eyes softened that effect. He was sharing his back story at Brian’s request when Brian interrupted him. “Hold on. You had a high paying job as a design engineer at an international telecommunications company based in Sweden, right?”
“Yes, as I say, it was a very good position to be in.”
“Okay, but you left that job to buy a company that made motors for commercial washing machines and industrial machinery? A company that had just closed its doors after seventy-five years in business?”
“That’s right. I bought Axelsson Motors out of the hands of its debt holders.”
“Why? If you wanted to build motorcycles, why not just open Bonnevier Motors?”
“I’ll tell you why, Brian,” he leaned in, his enthusiasm about his business so intense it was contagious. “I always wanted to build motorcycles. When I was a little boy, I would follow my grandpapa to his work shop where he indulged his hobby of restoring vintage automobiles that he had collected. I would use his tools to take my tricycle apart and put it back together in ways to improve it. Then I moved up to my bicycle, then my first motor scooter, and then my dirt bike. I always had visions in my head of what would make the bikes a better ride. My adult job, well paying as it was, only paid bills. It did nothing to satisfy my heart. All of my spare time was spent in my shop. In this way, I was very much the child of my grandpapa.”
“So open your own company. Why buy Axelsson?” Brian persisted, trying to understand.
“Because Axelsson had physical assets. I had to sell some assets to pay off their debts, and avoid a tangle in the courts, but after doing so, I still had two closed factories, some raw materials and names of many skilled machinists who needed jobs. I knew they could be easily retrained and they would be grateful for the chance to work again, even at a reduced wage. Add to this the fact that I got all of the rights to the Axelsson Motors name and logos. Did you notice the Axelsson logo? That Viking shield and the thunderbolt of Thor? It’s iconic in Sweden. Very well known.”
Brian smiled. “Sweden, that motorcycle capital of the world.”
Stefan chuckled. “You have your fun at me, but the first factory was retooled and work was begun and that is how the Axel 900 racing bike was made.”
“Do you have investors? Where did you get this money? Even a well-paid job couldn’t amass a bankroll like that, not for a guy as young as you are. Who paid to retool the factory?”
“I spent all I had saved from my old job and added to that a modest inheritance I received when my grandfather died. Besides myself, I have only one investor. Rocky.”
“Rocky,” Brian repeated. “The famous flying squirrel or…”
Stefan looked confused, obviously never exposed to the adventures of Rocky and Bullwinkle. “Rocky is my partner in life and in this business. Without Rocky’s money, it couldn’t have been done. I’m the creative force behind this dream, but Rocky made it happen for me.”
Brian thought of his relationship with Justin. Was there a similarity with Brian playing the part of Rocky or was he giving himself too much credit? He cocked a brow. “What does he do, this partner of yours? Pro boxer?”
“Pop singer. Very well known in Scandinavia and parts of Europe, not as well known here. Several hits have paid quite well. Rocky’s music is in some local commercials and is played often in dance clubs. Tours and sales online as well as in stores paid many royalties. You know that song that is called in English, ‘Creamed’?” He hummed a catchy tune and Brian smiled. It was a common standard in the gay clubs. The thumpa-thumpa beat and suggestive lyrics were well suited to the scene.
“I’ve heard a cover version some rock chick made of that song. Her video gets played a lot. She wears a black bra and black vinyl shorts with torn fishnets and these crazy red patent leather stiletto boots that match her hair. In the video, she gyrates with all these sexy male dancers like they just got off a gang bang.”
Stefan laughed. “That’s Rocky. Her given name is Rakel. She’s my partner. In real life her hair is blonde, not the cherry color in that video and she is far more toned down in her fashions. After all, we have young twins to consider,” he added with a smile.
“So your investor is a hot pop singer who bore your kids?”
“I’m one lucky man, no?”
“You must be doing something right.”
“She believes in me. What about you, Brian? Married? Children?”
“I have a son who is ten. And I’m in a long term relationship.”
“His mother?”
“His mother is my friend. I was a donor. You know,” Brian mimicked a masturbation motion. “The old turkey baster and Dixie cup method. My partner is a guy, Stefan. I’m gay and make no secret of it. Is that a problem?”
“In Sweden, no one is worried by such things. To each his own, yes? We have many friends who are gay. Rocky assures me I have a gay following I don’t even know about,” he laughs. “So can I tell you of my plans for North America? All of the street bikes we produced for the European market sold out. Every one. We make more, and they, too, are gone. We haven’t made enough bikes to be profitable yet, but we will be.”
Brian’s cell interrupted with a distinctive ring. The song “Last Dance” indicated Justin was calling. “Excuse me a minute. Why are you up at this hour?” Brian answered.
“Couldn’t sleep. It’s too quiet here. Where are you?”
“At Sinatra.”
“Oh, with a client?”
“Yeah, a new client. I think.”
“A new client most definitely!” Stefan insisted, causing Brian to laugh.
.
“Big Swedish guy. Looks like a Viking god, nothing to worry about.”
Justin chuckled. “You ass. Does he really?”
“Yeah, but alas, he’s straight.”
“That’s never stopped you.”
“Now, now. Shouldn’t you be so stuffed on pasta and wine that you can’t stay awake?”
“Brian, can you come over for a weekend?”
“Yeah, maybe, but not this weekend. I have this new account I need to get my arms around.”
“Can’t say I like the sound of that.”
“I’ll call you later.”
“I’ll be asleep.”
“I’ll wake you up.”
“Fine, bye.”
Brian slipped the phone back in his pocket and turned to Stefan and asked. “So what is your plan for North America?”
“My prototype, little Axel, is my plan. She will be introduced here first. I can build a great bike, Brian, but it is up to you to ensure people out there know that.”
“Who is your target market?”
Stefan looked surprised by the question. “Americans.”
“Bring that down a notch.”
“Americans who like to ride motorcycles?”
“That’s everyone from the pimple-faced adolescent dirt biker to the fat ass retiree who loves his Harley. I see we have a lot of work to do.”
“So you’ll take on this account?”
“Come to my office tomorrow,” Brian handed him a business card. “We have a lot to discuss.”
Stefan leaned across the table, grabbed Brian’s shoulders and planted a kiss on each cheek. “We will have fun with this!”
Brian inhaled the Swede’s clean scent and smiled. Yes, maybe they would. Maybe this was just what he needed to get him out of his mood.
SESSION with Brian Kinney.
Doctor: It wasn’t easy fitting you in like this, Brian.
Brian: I know, I know, mea culpa.
Doctor: You seem less depressed today.
Brian: That’s because I am.
Doctor: Why do you think that is?
Brian: I met a man last night.
Doctor: We’ve discussed using sex as a coping mechanism, Brian. It’s a bad idea.
Brian: I said I met him, didn’t say I fucked him.
Doctor: I stand corrected.
Brian: You judge me so harshly. (Chuckles) He’s a new client. I’m very interested in his project. I feel energized about my work right now. It will probably wear off soon, but for now, I feel some of the old fire for this project.
Doctor: That sounds promising. But don’t forget to work on you while you are at it. Don’t bury everything under the stress and fatigue of hard work.
Brian: Christ, does nothing make you happy for me?
Doctor: It’s not about my being happy for you, Brian. It’s about you being happy for you. You were very low when last we met. If you don’t work on your underlying issues, when this ad campaign is launched, you will slip right back into that blue state of mind.
Brian: Maybe I won’t. Maybe I’ll feel recommitted to my work. Why do you always have to see the dark side?
Doctor: I don’t. I am simply stating a fact. (After a pause) Are you not talking now?
Brian: I don’t have anything to say.
Doctor: You’re sulking.
Brian: I don’t sulk.
Doctor: Have you heard from Justin?
Brian: He wants me to come over there for a weekend.
Doctor: How do you feel about that?
Brian: I miss him. I want to see him but I can’t right now. I am about to start a new campaign.
Doctor: Remember that exercise we did on setting priorities?
Brian: (Deep sigh) Yeah.
Doctor: Offices are mobile now, true?
Brian: My client is here, at least for now.
Doctor: Examine your priorities, Brian. You decide if they are appropriate and follow that decision. I can’t decide for you.
Brian: Sometimes, if you want to be successful in life, you have to put what you have to do above what you want to do.
Doctor: True enough, and what is it you want to do? See Justin? Or work on this campaign? What is it you have to do? See Justin or work on this campaign?
Brian: I hate it when you go all “Yoda” on me.
Doctor: Let me know what you decide.
Doctor’s notes:
I am concerned that a new professional challenge has given Brian the same cover he used to get from drugs and/or casual sexual encounters. It allows him to avoid the issues that are important to him at this phase of his life. This tendency not only strains his relationship with his partner, but it stresses him, too. My immediate goal is to keep him in therapy so that we can continue to probe these problems despite other things going on with him. With Brian, that is always a difficult focus to maintain.
THIS IS INTENDED FOR ADULTS AGE 21 OR OLDER. SEXUAL SITUATIONS. DO NOT OPEN IF YOU ARE NOT 21.
PITTSBURGH, 8PM
Brian often brought clients to the bar called “Sinatra”. Leather booths, floor to ceiling walls of glass that overlooked the city, and gleaming blood wood floors gave it a sleek modern look while the live music was strictly retro. Attractive wait staff served decadent martinis, and the noise level was low enough that a conversation could be held. Brian would never come here for fun. The crowd was mostly straight and boring but it was a good venue for conducting business.
A particular waitress knew him well and had learned there was no use flirting with the handsome executive. Either he was faithfully married, or he was gay. She lost on both bets. His gorgeous companion, however, was fertile ground and she gave Stefan Bonnevier her best push. He, too, was apparently disinterested. Disappointed, she put down their second round of dirty vodka martinis and moved on to hunt among more willing prey.
In the dim light, Bonnevier’s sculpted facial bones were almost skeletal, but the fjord blue mist of his eyes softened that effect. He was sharing his back story at Brian’s request when Brian interrupted him. “Hold on. You had a high paying job as a design engineer at an international telecommunications company based in Sweden, right?”
“Yes, as I say, it was a very good position to be in.”
“Okay, but you left that job to buy a company that made motors for commercial washing machines and industrial machinery? A company that had just closed its doors after seventy-five years in business?”
“That’s right. I bought Axelsson Motors out of the hands of its debt holders.”
“Why? If you wanted to build motorcycles, why not just open Bonnevier Motors?”
“I’ll tell you why, Brian,” he leaned in, his enthusiasm about his business so intense it was contagious. “I always wanted to build motorcycles. When I was a little boy, I would follow my grandpapa to his work shop where he indulged his hobby of restoring vintage automobiles that he had collected. I would use his tools to take my tricycle apart and put it back together in ways to improve it. Then I moved up to my bicycle, then my first motor scooter, and then my dirt bike. I always had visions in my head of what would make the bikes a better ride. My adult job, well paying as it was, only paid bills. It did nothing to satisfy my heart. All of my spare time was spent in my shop. In this way, I was very much the child of my grandpapa.”
“So open your own company. Why buy Axelsson?” Brian persisted, trying to understand.
“Because Axelsson had physical assets. I had to sell some assets to pay off their debts, and avoid a tangle in the courts, but after doing so, I still had two closed factories, some raw materials and names of many skilled machinists who needed jobs. I knew they could be easily retrained and they would be grateful for the chance to work again, even at a reduced wage. Add to this the fact that I got all of the rights to the Axelsson Motors name and logos. Did you notice the Axelsson logo? That Viking shield and the thunderbolt of Thor? It’s iconic in Sweden. Very well known.”
Brian smiled. “Sweden, that motorcycle capital of the world.”
Stefan chuckled. “You have your fun at me, but the first factory was retooled and work was begun and that is how the Axel 900 racing bike was made.”
“Do you have investors? Where did you get this money? Even a well-paid job couldn’t amass a bankroll like that, not for a guy as young as you are. Who paid to retool the factory?”
“I spent all I had saved from my old job and added to that a modest inheritance I received when my grandfather died. Besides myself, I have only one investor. Rocky.”
“Rocky,” Brian repeated. “The famous flying squirrel or…”
Stefan looked confused, obviously never exposed to the adventures of Rocky and Bullwinkle. “Rocky is my partner in life and in this business. Without Rocky’s money, it couldn’t have been done. I’m the creative force behind this dream, but Rocky made it happen for me.”
Brian thought of his relationship with Justin. Was there a similarity with Brian playing the part of Rocky or was he giving himself too much credit? He cocked a brow. “What does he do, this partner of yours? Pro boxer?”
“Pop singer. Very well known in Scandinavia and parts of Europe, not as well known here. Several hits have paid quite well. Rocky’s music is in some local commercials and is played often in dance clubs. Tours and sales online as well as in stores paid many royalties. You know that song that is called in English, ‘Creamed’?” He hummed a catchy tune and Brian smiled. It was a common standard in the gay clubs. The thumpa-thumpa beat and suggestive lyrics were well suited to the scene.
“I’ve heard a cover version some rock chick made of that song. Her video gets played a lot. She wears a black bra and black vinyl shorts with torn fishnets and these crazy red patent leather stiletto boots that match her hair. In the video, she gyrates with all these sexy male dancers like they just got off a gang bang.”
Stefan laughed. “That’s Rocky. Her given name is Rakel. She’s my partner. In real life her hair is blonde, not the cherry color in that video and she is far more toned down in her fashions. After all, we have young twins to consider,” he added with a smile.
“So your investor is a hot pop singer who bore your kids?”
“I’m one lucky man, no?”
“You must be doing something right.”
“She believes in me. What about you, Brian? Married? Children?”
“I have a son who is ten. And I’m in a long term relationship.”
“His mother?”
“His mother is my friend. I was a donor. You know,” Brian mimicked a masturbation motion. “The old turkey baster and Dixie cup method. My partner is a guy, Stefan. I’m gay and make no secret of it. Is that a problem?”
“In Sweden, no one is worried by such things. To each his own, yes? We have many friends who are gay. Rocky assures me I have a gay following I don’t even know about,” he laughs. “So can I tell you of my plans for North America? All of the street bikes we produced for the European market sold out. Every one. We make more, and they, too, are gone. We haven’t made enough bikes to be profitable yet, but we will be.”
Brian’s cell interrupted with a distinctive ring. The song “Last Dance” indicated Justin was calling. “Excuse me a minute. Why are you up at this hour?” Brian answered.
“Couldn’t sleep. It’s too quiet here. Where are you?”
“At Sinatra.”
“Oh, with a client?”
“Yeah, a new client. I think.”
“A new client most definitely!” Stefan insisted, causing Brian to laugh.
.
“Big Swedish guy. Looks like a Viking god, nothing to worry about.”
Justin chuckled. “You ass. Does he really?”
“Yeah, but alas, he’s straight.”
“That’s never stopped you.”
“Now, now. Shouldn’t you be so stuffed on pasta and wine that you can’t stay awake?”
“Brian, can you come over for a weekend?”
“Yeah, maybe, but not this weekend. I have this new account I need to get my arms around.”
“Can’t say I like the sound of that.”
“I’ll call you later.”
“I’ll be asleep.”
“I’ll wake you up.”
“Fine, bye.”
Brian slipped the phone back in his pocket and turned to Stefan and asked. “So what is your plan for North America?”
“My prototype, little Axel, is my plan. She will be introduced here first. I can build a great bike, Brian, but it is up to you to ensure people out there know that.”
“Who is your target market?”
Stefan looked surprised by the question. “Americans.”
“Bring that down a notch.”
“Americans who like to ride motorcycles?”
“That’s everyone from the pimple-faced adolescent dirt biker to the fat ass retiree who loves his Harley. I see we have a lot of work to do.”
“So you’ll take on this account?”
“Come to my office tomorrow,” Brian handed him a business card. “We have a lot to discuss.”
Stefan leaned across the table, grabbed Brian’s shoulders and planted a kiss on each cheek. “We will have fun with this!”
Brian inhaled the Swede’s clean scent and smiled. Yes, maybe they would. Maybe this was just what he needed to get him out of his mood.
SESSION with Brian Kinney.
Doctor: It wasn’t easy fitting you in like this, Brian.
Brian: I know, I know, mea culpa.
Doctor: You seem less depressed today.
Brian: That’s because I am.
Doctor: Why do you think that is?
Brian: I met a man last night.
Doctor: We’ve discussed using sex as a coping mechanism, Brian. It’s a bad idea.
Brian: I said I met him, didn’t say I fucked him.
Doctor: I stand corrected.
Brian: You judge me so harshly. (Chuckles) He’s a new client. I’m very interested in his project. I feel energized about my work right now. It will probably wear off soon, but for now, I feel some of the old fire for this project.
Doctor: That sounds promising. But don’t forget to work on you while you are at it. Don’t bury everything under the stress and fatigue of hard work.
Brian: Christ, does nothing make you happy for me?
Doctor: It’s not about my being happy for you, Brian. It’s about you being happy for you. You were very low when last we met. If you don’t work on your underlying issues, when this ad campaign is launched, you will slip right back into that blue state of mind.
Brian: Maybe I won’t. Maybe I’ll feel recommitted to my work. Why do you always have to see the dark side?
Doctor: I don’t. I am simply stating a fact. (After a pause) Are you not talking now?
Brian: I don’t have anything to say.
Doctor: You’re sulking.
Brian: I don’t sulk.
Doctor: Have you heard from Justin?
Brian: He wants me to come over there for a weekend.
Doctor: How do you feel about that?
Brian: I miss him. I want to see him but I can’t right now. I am about to start a new campaign.
Doctor: Remember that exercise we did on setting priorities?
Brian: (Deep sigh) Yeah.
Doctor: Offices are mobile now, true?
Brian: My client is here, at least for now.
Doctor: Examine your priorities, Brian. You decide if they are appropriate and follow that decision. I can’t decide for you.
Brian: Sometimes, if you want to be successful in life, you have to put what you have to do above what you want to do.
Doctor: True enough, and what is it you want to do? See Justin? Or work on this campaign? What is it you have to do? See Justin or work on this campaign?
Brian: I hate it when you go all “Yoda” on me.
Doctor: Let me know what you decide.
Doctor’s notes:
I am concerned that a new professional challenge has given Brian the same cover he used to get from drugs and/or casual sexual encounters. It allows him to avoid the issues that are important to him at this phase of his life. This tendency not only strains his relationship with his partner, but it stresses him, too. My immediate goal is to keep him in therapy so that we can continue to probe these problems despite other things going on with him. With Brian, that is always a difficult focus to maintain.