A scene from a film I'm writing

[briancvdavis]

Okay, so I’m normally not this self-indulgent but I need honest feedback and this is as good a place as any to get it. This is the first few pages of a script I’m writing. I am already mostly finished with another one so I won’t be getting to work more on this one anytime soon. But this is the beginning and I need to know if it’s interesting and

Comments

Holy Shit

[eeyoresea]

can I be in your movie? I want to be the guy who delivers the incriminating photos!!!
that rocked!!!! I want to read more of your stuff!

[bramat78]

Brian, i cant maneuver around and dont make the best of critics, but i say, POST MORE!!!

But make it friends only so nobody steals your hard work!!

love brandon

[kubrickfan]

I really, really like it so far, Brian. It's very readable, even in the screenplay form which can be kind of choppy and hard to follow.

I'd like to read more before I give any real thoughts. Any chance I could glance at some more sometime?

[mickymse]

I like it so far... and it makes me want to know where it's going. Who's the main character? What's this story about?