well i had more than just the shake : ( but not enough to gain a pound thank god and I was really shocked by that cuz I ate a lot but 2m I will fast I hope I can fit into my old jeans soon I have nothing to wear i feel like suck a freak

so far I have had a chocolate banana shake should have been like 250-300 cal but that's it for today I hope I really don't want to eat much more but I'm gonna be with my boyfriend today which means at some point or another to please someone I will shove food in my disgusting face I WILL find the will power to fight this : )

i lost 5 lbs i'm really happy
it's finally going better
i'm gonna fast 2m and maybe i'll work out
2n well wish me luck :)

Today went really well I didn't eat that much a slice of pizza, and I mean like a sliver uh a bottle of tea it was like 120cal I think sum Sun Chips like crumbs my BF ate a small bag them we went for an hour long swim when we came home my bf was trying to be cute and surprise me his sisters b-day was on Sat she had this awful strawberry filled cake ( Read more... )

I did ok today I think I only gained 1or 2 pounds which I will work off later
so...
I took a week long vaca from work and I am DREADING going back
b/c or all the places I could fucking work at I work at a  grocery store
or a market or a food store w/e u want to call it and I hate it
the whole time I'm their I see all the things I would LOVE
to just ( Read more... )

I guess I'm doing ok Idk all I had today was

ice cream just a few spoons again
pasta and 3 small slices of bread
water
and like an idiot a chocolate chip muffin

2m I'm gonna try not to eat at all If I can. I wanna work out, but I have like 0 motive, and I dont wanna be sweaty : ( AHHHHHHHHHHHH!

I really just wish I could take scissors or a knife and
just cut away all the IMPERFECTION! I just want it to go away
I don’t want to be afraid of mirrors I don’t want to be on my scale every 3-5 hours
I don’t want to count cals and I don’t want do have to hate my self so much when I
always fail I just want to see 150 or 140 but no I get to look ( Read more... )

 Today was good I didn't eat a lot I had 9 shrimp 4 for lunch along with a few fries and it was my g-mas 71st B-day
so I had to go to dinner and we went to my fav restaurant Mr.Bennys :D and I got 5 lemon shrimp *DROOL*  and diet pop 
but later like around 11 or so Eric (my boyfriend) came over and he had beef fried rice i ate some not all
so I did ( Read more... )

wow I haven’t been on here in a very LONG time mostly cuz I got a new computer and I forgot about the site
but now I'm in a really bad place I really need some support or help well here it goes ...

since last X-Mas I gained not 1 or 2 lbs no.... BUT 10 FUCKING POUNDS, and no matter what I do i cant seem to get it off me I'm so hideous. im not skinny ( Read more... )

sorry i havent been on in so long just got on to say im not allowed on the comp during the week cuz of school really only on weekedns now and then im always busy with hw so yeah ill be on when i can 
<3 B