"So make my bed the grave and shovel dirt onto my sheets"
yeahhhhh... so read. comment if you wish. constructive criticism is helpful. but nothing mean/harsh please! i'm sensitive/protective about my writing, and i work to build it stronger, but it doesn't help if people bash it. thank you.
CLICK BELOW for the writing madness
yeah, okay, some/much of it is, again, relating to love and such. but that's what you get 1) from someone like me ("a hopeless romantic, destined to be alone" as I wrote in an older poem) and 2) when it's nearing, so close, to valentine's day.
on that note, here is a story about that wonderful day so many people are looking forward to, only to shell out hundreds of dollars on gifts and dinners. silly fools.
valentine's day. the day of hallmark cards in every hand, and the bitter chocolate of love, with feelings that may only be reciprocated on that one special day, simply because it's been imprinted into every person's brain that love is in the air, and now is the time to celebrate it. why not any other day? what's wrong with february 23rd? or june 18th? or september 30th? i think each day is just as fine; just as lovely. but of course, those kind and caring people in the holiday-making business chose february 14th. a sure-to-be chilly, mid-winter day day so as to provoke each person to find someone to snuggle up tight with next to a nice glowing fire to stay warm, with a heart-shaped box of chocolates in hand, ready to feed slowly to one another. can't you just go into your house and turn up the heater? you don't need someone else for that. but alas, it is the day chosen for love. and nothing much can be done about that now can it? and as it draws near, those of us who are lonely can't help but grow the slightest bit bitter. watching those in love doesn't help much. and what if, on february 14th, i wanted to wear red. that would seem to show my spirit and love for that oh-so-special day. i have no love for it. quite the opposite in fact. so now there goes the wardrobe options of red, pink, or even white. white! for god's sake, white. such a neutral color. well, not so much on that day. they've corrupted us all. don't you see it? even the color white has been taken. but i may be the only person who notices such things. i am alone. what a shame. a lonely valentine's day for me. nothing new. i'll wear all black, and strut down the hallways at school with a broken heart painted on my sleeve. and when dinner time rolls near, i shall walk like this through town, blasting music about broken hearts that will never mend. passing each and every restuarant and watch as each patron turns to look out the window in a mixture of confusion and distgust, as their "perfect night" has just been interrupted but some poor lonely soul. and that night, as i sit alone in my quiet house, i will eat the chocolates from 100 heart-shaped boxes that i had bought to wipe a store clean, so that no poor fool who thinks he is in love can waste his money on them for some undeserving girl. and i will flip through the television channels, only stopping when i see a young girl crying because, perhaps, a boy just broke her heart. that is all i will stop for. tears. and as my own tears slowing stroke my face with their warm touch, i will wonder why. for i am immune to all of this love crap, am i not? didn't i just finish explaining how much i hate this hallmark holiday where everyone pairs off but me, and that i am just fine with that? i did just say that, correct? so why am i crying? maybe i really want to be just like every other poor sap. maybe i want to buy into this day and buy a box of chocolates for someone else, not just myself. or maybe it's simply tears from thinking of those poor saps who are out there wasting their money on a holiday that is merely designed to make them do just that - empty their wallets until there's not even so much as a penny left. yes, i am laughing so hard at the thought of those idiots that i am indeed crying. so as they shake their heads in pity for me, the lonely one who loves no one but herself, i laugh.
-------------------------------------------
And with every breath I take
I wish you would take one less
(I'll steal the life from you
one breath at a time)
-------------------------------------------
Don't reveal a thing
Don't unearth a problem
Bury it deep (bury it well)
in the earth and hide it
Hidden forever
Never to be found
Hidden forever
never talked about
-------------------------------------------
I don't like missing you
But I love that I have you to miss
[So please don't slip away
and forever leave my grip]*
*(words within the [] are iffy. and this isn't even near complete, as it is only uh, 2(4) lines, but I am working on it and simply wanted to post the bit that I wrote of that thought or whatever.)
-------------------------------------------
Forever sleepless nights
crying over you
Wondering who you are with
and what you've been up to
Doesn't really matter though
'cause it's never me you're with
That's the only thing I really want
And the one thing I may never get
'Cause I've loved and lost
And no, it's not better that way
I'd rather have never loved at all
(All this has caused me is pain)
At one point it was great
But slowly it slipped away
Let's go back to those times of bliss
(Let's go back to our first kiss)
And let us stay there
Frozen in air
(Impossible)
If only...
(No more "If only"s)
But my mind always wanders
back to those times
Those nights where we'd talk till 3
in the morning
If only we could go back...
(no)
No more "of only"s please
Make my mind stop thinking
please
I can't stop thinking
And you're probably out
with someone else anyways
So I've learned
it may have been better to never have loved at all
but I've loved and lost
in this tragic tale
with its un-fairytale like end
-------------------------------------------
...And you're only hot
if you wear low-cut tops
that's false beauty
that's just not me
i guess i'm not pretty
in my turtlenecks
boatnecks
So what am i?
i don't tink i'm hideous
the epidemy of ugly
maybe i am
what do i know?
i'm just a foolish girl
who doesn't want to wear shirts
so tight they cut off circulation
i'm sorry i like to breath
I guess i'm just not pretty
in my loose-fitting t-shirts
maybe somewhat inflattering in shape
but comfortable
I like comfort
over cute
that's just how i am
i don't go for those high heels
and short skirts
give me sneakers and worn-in jeans
anyday
I guess i'm not so pretty
in my baggy pants
that leave much more to the imagination
than those other girls'
they digust me
i'd rather not disgust myself
so maybe i'm not the prettiest girl in the lot
with my too-big tops
and oversized pants
but i'd rather just be me
if that's okay
So what if i'm not what you'd call pretty?
at least i'm honest
right?
-------------------------------------------
you try to hide the bittersweet
smell of death
with 50 dollars of sweetness
but nothing masks that stench
and you just gotta love
the smell of perfume
mixed with cigarettes
(oh so sweet)
and don't you dare take out
that box of problems
near me
i don't want your idiocy
deciding MY fate
choose to be stupide
somewhere else
and oh, how i have grown
to hate
that new line of perfume
more than ever before
"Eu de Cigarette"
read: ~Eu de Death~
i'm pretty sure you've heard of it.
oh you just gotta love
that smell
of perfume
mixed with cigarettes
i promise you'll never again smell something so sweet
i swear
on your life
(it'll be the last thing you smell;
doesn't that make you just so happy?)
-------------------------------------------
and your tempting smile
and beautiful laugh
both more contagious
than every other
and i'd like for them to be
the very last things that i ever catch
what a happy death
that could be
but at the same time
in your arms
i feel like i could live f o r e v e r
-------------------------------------------
what's it today?
a new excuse for me to hold
and throw in the pile with
all the other?
not likely.
you're not even creative enough
to mix it up.
sorry i'm not buying it anymore
Boy Who Cried Wolf?
ha.
more like boy who cried every other thing
in the book.
Boy Who Cried "Sick!"
i hope you really get sick
horribly sick,
deathly sick,
crying-from-the-pain sick.
Boy Who Cried "Bad Weather"
i hope the rain floods you out
and the snow buries you deep.
and Boy Who Cried "Car Trouble"
i hope your car breaks down
at the busiest intersection
at rush-hour.
look!
here comes an 18-wheeler!!!
what
fun.
so stop with the lies
you've been left as pathetic
in my eyes
-------------------------------------------
okay, i have one other recent thing, but it's super long, so i'm gonna save that for next time. if anyone cares :)
CLICK BELOW for the writing madness
yeah, okay, some/much of it is, again, relating to love and such. but that's what you get 1) from someone like me ("a hopeless romantic, destined to be alone" as I wrote in an older poem) and 2) when it's nearing, so close, to valentine's day.
on that note, here is a story about that wonderful day so many people are looking forward to, only to shell out hundreds of dollars on gifts and dinners. silly fools.
valentine's day. the day of hallmark cards in every hand, and the bitter chocolate of love, with feelings that may only be reciprocated on that one special day, simply because it's been imprinted into every person's brain that love is in the air, and now is the time to celebrate it. why not any other day? what's wrong with february 23rd? or june 18th? or september 30th? i think each day is just as fine; just as lovely. but of course, those kind and caring people in the holiday-making business chose february 14th. a sure-to-be chilly, mid-winter day day so as to provoke each person to find someone to snuggle up tight with next to a nice glowing fire to stay warm, with a heart-shaped box of chocolates in hand, ready to feed slowly to one another. can't you just go into your house and turn up the heater? you don't need someone else for that. but alas, it is the day chosen for love. and nothing much can be done about that now can it? and as it draws near, those of us who are lonely can't help but grow the slightest bit bitter. watching those in love doesn't help much. and what if, on february 14th, i wanted to wear red. that would seem to show my spirit and love for that oh-so-special day. i have no love for it. quite the opposite in fact. so now there goes the wardrobe options of red, pink, or even white. white! for god's sake, white. such a neutral color. well, not so much on that day. they've corrupted us all. don't you see it? even the color white has been taken. but i may be the only person who notices such things. i am alone. what a shame. a lonely valentine's day for me. nothing new. i'll wear all black, and strut down the hallways at school with a broken heart painted on my sleeve. and when dinner time rolls near, i shall walk like this through town, blasting music about broken hearts that will never mend. passing each and every restuarant and watch as each patron turns to look out the window in a mixture of confusion and distgust, as their "perfect night" has just been interrupted but some poor lonely soul. and that night, as i sit alone in my quiet house, i will eat the chocolates from 100 heart-shaped boxes that i had bought to wipe a store clean, so that no poor fool who thinks he is in love can waste his money on them for some undeserving girl. and i will flip through the television channels, only stopping when i see a young girl crying because, perhaps, a boy just broke her heart. that is all i will stop for. tears. and as my own tears slowing stroke my face with their warm touch, i will wonder why. for i am immune to all of this love crap, am i not? didn't i just finish explaining how much i hate this hallmark holiday where everyone pairs off but me, and that i am just fine with that? i did just say that, correct? so why am i crying? maybe i really want to be just like every other poor sap. maybe i want to buy into this day and buy a box of chocolates for someone else, not just myself. or maybe it's simply tears from thinking of those poor saps who are out there wasting their money on a holiday that is merely designed to make them do just that - empty their wallets until there's not even so much as a penny left. yes, i am laughing so hard at the thought of those idiots that i am indeed crying. so as they shake their heads in pity for me, the lonely one who loves no one but herself, i laugh.
-------------------------------------------
And with every breath I take
I wish you would take one less
(I'll steal the life from you
one breath at a time)
-------------------------------------------
Don't reveal a thing
Don't unearth a problem
Bury it deep (bury it well)
in the earth and hide it
Hidden forever
Never to be found
Hidden forever
never talked about
-------------------------------------------
I don't like missing you
But I love that I have you to miss
[So please don't slip away
and forever leave my grip]*
*(words within the [] are iffy. and this isn't even near complete, as it is only uh, 2(4) lines, but I am working on it and simply wanted to post the bit that I wrote of that thought or whatever.)
-------------------------------------------
Forever sleepless nights
crying over you
Wondering who you are with
and what you've been up to
Doesn't really matter though
'cause it's never me you're with
That's the only thing I really want
And the one thing I may never get
'Cause I've loved and lost
And no, it's not better that way
I'd rather have never loved at all
(All this has caused me is pain)
At one point it was great
But slowly it slipped away
Let's go back to those times of bliss
(Let's go back to our first kiss)
And let us stay there
Frozen in air
(Impossible)
If only...
(No more "If only"s)
But my mind always wanders
back to those times
Those nights where we'd talk till 3
in the morning
If only we could go back...
(no)
No more "of only"s please
Make my mind stop thinking
please
I can't stop thinking
And you're probably out
with someone else anyways
So I've learned
it may have been better to never have loved at all
but I've loved and lost
in this tragic tale
with its un-fairytale like end
-------------------------------------------
...And you're only hot
if you wear low-cut tops
that's false beauty
that's just not me
i guess i'm not pretty
in my turtlenecks
boatnecks
So what am i?
i don't tink i'm hideous
the epidemy of ugly
maybe i am
what do i know?
i'm just a foolish girl
who doesn't want to wear shirts
so tight they cut off circulation
i'm sorry i like to breath
I guess i'm just not pretty
in my loose-fitting t-shirts
maybe somewhat inflattering in shape
but comfortable
I like comfort
over cute
that's just how i am
i don't go for those high heels
and short skirts
give me sneakers and worn-in jeans
anyday
I guess i'm not so pretty
in my baggy pants
that leave much more to the imagination
than those other girls'
they digust me
i'd rather not disgust myself
so maybe i'm not the prettiest girl in the lot
with my too-big tops
and oversized pants
but i'd rather just be me
if that's okay
So what if i'm not what you'd call pretty?
at least i'm honest
right?
-------------------------------------------
you try to hide the bittersweet
smell of death
with 50 dollars of sweetness
but nothing masks that stench
and you just gotta love
the smell of perfume
mixed with cigarettes
(oh so sweet)
and don't you dare take out
that box of problems
near me
i don't want your idiocy
deciding MY fate
choose to be stupide
somewhere else
and oh, how i have grown
to hate
that new line of perfume
more than ever before
"Eu de Cigarette"
read: ~Eu de Death~
i'm pretty sure you've heard of it.
oh you just gotta love
that smell
of perfume
mixed with cigarettes
i promise you'll never again smell something so sweet
i swear
on your life
(it'll be the last thing you smell;
doesn't that make you just so happy?)
-------------------------------------------
and your tempting smile
and beautiful laugh
both more contagious
than every other
and i'd like for them to be
the very last things that i ever catch
what a happy death
that could be
but at the same time
in your arms
i feel like i could live f o r e v e r
-------------------------------------------
what's it today?
a new excuse for me to hold
and throw in the pile with
all the other?
not likely.
you're not even creative enough
to mix it up.
sorry i'm not buying it anymore
Boy Who Cried Wolf?
ha.
more like boy who cried every other thing
in the book.
Boy Who Cried "Sick!"
i hope you really get sick
horribly sick,
deathly sick,
crying-from-the-pain sick.
Boy Who Cried "Bad Weather"
i hope the rain floods you out
and the snow buries you deep.
and Boy Who Cried "Car Trouble"
i hope your car breaks down
at the busiest intersection
at rush-hour.
look!
here comes an 18-wheeler!!!
what
fun.
so stop with the lies
you've been left as pathetic
in my eyes
-------------------------------------------
okay, i have one other recent thing, but it's super long, so i'm gonna save that for next time. if anyone cares :)