Comments | bromhidrosis69: looking for insight...

bromhidrosis69

looking for insight...

Jul 11, 2007 08:48

there has been a phylosophy about couples that has always baffled me... if you have to split the bills and finiances in half why are you in a relationship with this person... more specifically a marriage... if you cant trust the bitch with your money why are you two still together... i mean i have plenty of friends and they are great friends but i ( Read more... )

Comments 4

sirnocturne July 11 2007, 15:06:13 UTC

Some people at their most basic are not meant for long-lasting relationships. Some people get into a relationship out of no more than convenience, and are always quietly on the lookout for the next best thing.

There's two main, common reasons for a lack of trust in a relationship. The first being that one person has something to hide, so they assume the other person does as well. The other being a betrayed trust in a past relationship.

People are odd creatures, that's for sure.

bromhidrosis69 July 11 2007, 15:56:41 UTC

People are odd creatures, that's for sure....
you can say that again... the more i learn about people the less i understand....

joy0327 July 11 2007, 18:02:04 UTC

The ones that confuse me even more are the ones that want to spy on their significant others to see if they're talking to other people or cheating or whatever. Um, 'xcuse me, but if you have so little trust in your partner that you want to spy on them and/or can't believe they're telling you the truth if you've confronted them...then why are you still together again?

But, I have to agree with Noc. I think there are just some people that, either from nature or nurture, are incapable of healthy long-term relationships with someone. The grass is greener elsewhere, they no longer know how to handle stability and sabotage anything good that presents itself into their lives, etc etc.

My compassionate self... azazelwho July 12 2007, 03:53:00 UTC

is the one present tonight...

First of all, none of us are born knowing how to have that "perfect" relationship. We learn. We learn from our parents, relatives, friends, TV, experience... What if all of those influences are dysfunctional? What if you don't realize they are dysfunctional...

Second, insecurity / immaturity play a big part in problems with relationships. Luckily most of us grow out of it...

Third, I recently learned of some friends who, after being together 10+ years, had issues w/ trust & finances. I don't want to get into the details here (these are friends who most of you do not know), but in their case I do not agree that they should have split up. They worked out their issues, and slowly rebuilt the trust.

Each of us has our "if my partner did XYZ, I would not be in a relationship with them". The trick is finding someone whose XYZ is compatible with yours. (Yea, I know, kinda cheesy, but hopefully you get my point.)