Lyrics to Wickeder
Because I need a distraction from drama, I'm transcribing this amusing piece of parody, to which dark_toothfairy cackled over and over from sheer delight. This is from Forbidden Broadway : SVU, and performed by actors who portrayed Kristen Chenoweth & Idina Menzel brilliantly (and hilariously).
BG SINGERS
No more wars for Wicked
KRISTIN CHENOWETH
Aren't you glad, I started Wicked?
I'm Kristin Chenoweth, beloved by you
But I'm being co-starred with you know who
Fellow New Yorkians, I would like to introduce to you
My beloved friend and glamourous co-star : Idina Menzel
KC & IDINA MENZEL
We're both so happy
We're both so happy now
We're both so happy how
KC
She gets the big ovation
IM
But she's the big sensation
KC& IM
We both defer the final bow
Cause she's the bigger star
Right now
(kissy sounds & giggling)
KC
Popular
I'm glad you're so popular
You've been on more tv shows
And you've modelled clothes
Somewhat even called obscene
You're in all the PR shots
And the promo spots
You even look attractive green
IM
Yes, I'm popular
But you're the more popular
You've even been Brantley's pet
And you've got a set
Of pipes to rival Barbara Cook
You're the star who wrote
the 'I'm loved and I'm famous' book
KC
You're such a sweety that my zero malacies
putting all my bitchiness into paralysis
KC & IM
Thank God you've chosen me to be your pal, your sis-
ter and advisor, you're bigger now than Pfizer
You're in demand and
KC
Popular du du du du
I love that you're popular
It must be your destiny
To be big as me
I know you'll make the bigger ster, star
I'm genuinely happy you've become more populer, lar
Hah, la la
IM
What a love fest la la
KC
She's the bestest
KC & IM
I'm glad that you're so popular
(KC: Oh, you're so pretty
IM : Thank you, thank you)
ANNOUNCER
And now the Tony awards for best actress in a musical
KC
Oh, Idina, wait!
Before they announce the winner,
let's make a blood oath
No matter what happens
Whoever wins
We will always love each other
and remain the dearest of friends
IM
Yes, always
ANNOUNCER
And the winner is Idina Menzel in Wicked
IM
Hah, I am the star!
KC
I hope you're happy
I hope you're happy now
I hope you're happy how
You stole from me the Tony
You vulgar one trick pony
IM
I am so happy
I am so happy now
I am so happy how
I won your little Tony
You cute obnoxious phony
KC
You give me back my final bow
KC & IM
And no one's happy right now
KC
Idina, listen to me
We can still be friends
Just say you're sorry
and hand over the Tony to me
IM
What?
KC
I mean
Stephen Schwartz could use that Tony
For he's never won before
You can save a starving writer
IM
I know
KC
Trust my wisdom
IM
No
I don't want to
Anymore
KC
Huh, she doesn't want to
I wonder why
That's a thinker, huh
IM
I'll be the star of Wicked
After you leave the show
And once the cast has changed
I'll grab top billing when you go
It's time I try defying Chenoweth
I'm gonna fly defying Chenoweth
You're not the best in town
KC
You're losing your equilibrum
That green paint seeped in your cerebrum
So don't dare try defying Chenoweth
KC & IM
You're/I'm gonna die defying Chenoweth
I'll wear the diva crown
KC
Monkeys! No, monkeys. NO, MONKEYS!
IM
So strap me in a harness
And hoist me up to the sky
In all the big shows lately
All the leading ladies have to fly
And hanging from the rafters
I'll dangle like a blimp
Pump up my volume
As I kill my flying chimp
But suddenly I am defying subtlety
With death defying lack of subtlety
I'll capture world reknown
I'll blow the Gershwin up because
I am the loudest witch in Oz
And no one's gonna turn
My volume down
BG SINGERS
Wicked! Wicked! Intermission!
BG SINGERS
No more wars for Wicked
KRISTIN CHENOWETH
Aren't you glad, I started Wicked?
I'm Kristin Chenoweth, beloved by you
But I'm being co-starred with you know who
Fellow New Yorkians, I would like to introduce to you
My beloved friend and glamourous co-star : Idina Menzel
KC & IDINA MENZEL
We're both so happy
We're both so happy now
We're both so happy how
KC
She gets the big ovation
IM
But she's the big sensation
KC& IM
We both defer the final bow
Cause she's the bigger star
Right now
(kissy sounds & giggling)
KC
Popular
I'm glad you're so popular
You've been on more tv shows
And you've modelled clothes
Somewhat even called obscene
You're in all the PR shots
And the promo spots
You even look attractive green
IM
Yes, I'm popular
But you're the more popular
You've even been Brantley's pet
And you've got a set
Of pipes to rival Barbara Cook
You're the star who wrote
the 'I'm loved and I'm famous' book
KC
You're such a sweety that my zero malacies
putting all my bitchiness into paralysis
KC & IM
Thank God you've chosen me to be your pal, your sis-
ter and advisor, you're bigger now than Pfizer
You're in demand and
KC
Popular du du du du
I love that you're popular
It must be your destiny
To be big as me
I know you'll make the bigger ster, star
I'm genuinely happy you've become more populer, lar
Hah, la la
IM
What a love fest la la
KC
She's the bestest
KC & IM
I'm glad that you're so popular
(KC: Oh, you're so pretty
IM : Thank you, thank you)
ANNOUNCER
And now the Tony awards for best actress in a musical
KC
Oh, Idina, wait!
Before they announce the winner,
let's make a blood oath
No matter what happens
Whoever wins
We will always love each other
and remain the dearest of friends
IM
Yes, always
ANNOUNCER
And the winner is Idina Menzel in Wicked
IM
Hah, I am the star!
KC
I hope you're happy
I hope you're happy now
I hope you're happy how
You stole from me the Tony
You vulgar one trick pony
IM
I am so happy
I am so happy now
I am so happy how
I won your little Tony
You cute obnoxious phony
KC
You give me back my final bow
KC & IM
And no one's happy right now
KC
Idina, listen to me
We can still be friends
Just say you're sorry
and hand over the Tony to me
IM
What?
KC
I mean
Stephen Schwartz could use that Tony
For he's never won before
You can save a starving writer
IM
I know
KC
Trust my wisdom
IM
No
I don't want to
Anymore
KC
Huh, she doesn't want to
I wonder why
That's a thinker, huh
IM
I'll be the star of Wicked
After you leave the show
And once the cast has changed
I'll grab top billing when you go
It's time I try defying Chenoweth
I'm gonna fly defying Chenoweth
You're not the best in town
KC
You're losing your equilibrum
That green paint seeped in your cerebrum
So don't dare try defying Chenoweth
KC & IM
You're/I'm gonna die defying Chenoweth
I'll wear the diva crown
KC
Monkeys! No, monkeys. NO, MONKEYS!
IM
So strap me in a harness
And hoist me up to the sky
In all the big shows lately
All the leading ladies have to fly
And hanging from the rafters
I'll dangle like a blimp
Pump up my volume
As I kill my flying chimp
But suddenly I am defying subtlety
With death defying lack of subtlety
I'll capture world reknown
I'll blow the Gershwin up because
I am the loudest witch in Oz
And no one's gonna turn
My volume down
BG SINGERS
Wicked! Wicked! Intermission!