Doctor Who Meta OR Why Rose Tyler is Perfect and Needs to Come Home
Listen, I just need to make this incredibly, crystal, perfectly clear:
I will fucking bludgeon Steven Moffatt with a blonde Barbie that Eleven kisses if Rose Tyler doesn't come back to the show.
he needs Rose. The Doctor NEEDS her, even more than Amy or Donna or River. (And he needs Amy so much more than we can understand, so wow, that's a lot.) And EVERYTHING is pointing back to Rose. EVERYTHING. God. Watching "Hide" was like watching a study in why this fucking OTP makes me want to kill myself, sometimes.
Okay so, I have two theories
1. TenTwo goes fucking batshit crazy as a human, because even though he loves Rose like nobodies business, and even though he's got a bit of Donna inside him, he's meant to be a Time Lord. he's got all that mind, all that knowledge, and it hurts his human brain. That one human heart hurts him. Everything,f ucking everything hurts him, and he misses the TARDIS and being still and having carpets and four fucking walls so much he can't breathe, alright. Rose helped heal him after the Time War, but not even Rose can fix how wrong he is now. So he just goes effing loony loo loo and either kills himself, or becomes the dark, evil bastard we all know the Doctor has the potential to be.
A. There's always the possiblity that TenTwo becomes The Valeyard. We know the Master says "The Valeyard, Doctor, is penultimate reincarnation...Somewhere between your 12th and 13th regenerations." Well, between 12 and 13 is a fucking tiny window of time if you're saying literally while he's leaving 12 and becoming 13, or even while he's 12 or 13 at any point. But the Master could have had it wrong, or even lied, not wanting the Doctor to become aware of when the Valeyard will be born. The Metacrisis Doctor would become so embittered and hateful of his other self, so untrustful that Rose is seeing him and not the actual Doctor, he'd just LOSE HIS BANANAS and get his Valeyard on. GOD. Can you imagine!? David playing AN EVIL DOCTOR!? Fuck yes, can this happen now.
B. We know the Doctor gave Rose and the Metacrisis a part of the TARDIS so they could grow their own. WHAT IF THE VALEYARD IS TRYING TO GET TO ELEVEN TO FUCK HIS ENTIRE LIFE UP AND JUST RUIN HIM AND BE AN EVIL DICK AND ROSE PIGGYBACKS ON HIS TRIP OOOOOOORRRRRRR SOMEHOW GETS THE DIMENSION CANNON OR SOMETHING EQUIVELENT TO WORKING AND IS HEADING TO THE DOCTOR TO WARN HIM WHAT'S HAPPENING AND CLARA IS EMPATH AND SHE'S HONED IN CLARA. Maybe Rose and Clara are related, somehow? I wouldn't know how, but it could happen. Especially in this series.
2. Rose looked into the Heart of the Tardis during "The Parting of Ways", and that Nine sucked out the time vortex that was inside her, thus causing his regeneration. BUT. Do you really buy that he got all of it? That nothing was left, and Rose was UTTERLY UNCHANGED by having it in her!? BECAUSE I DON'T. I mean HOW could it not change her!? So I think in Pete's World Rose and the Metacrisis Doctor live together, and are happy and maybe have babies (awww babies) and have a life, but the Metacrisis gets old and dies, and when Rose kicks the bucket...she fucking regenerates. Oh yeah. How many regenerations will she have? Does she become a Time Lady? Listen, I DON'T KNOW, but having the entirety of eternity laid out before you, God. So lonely.
So Rose, somehow (perhaps with their homegrown TARDIS), begins attempting to get back to her Doctor. She's just as immortal as he is now...they can spend forever together, JUST LIKE SHE PROMISED HIM. And they can have companions and maybe babies and hook up with Jack every once in a while and more awesome companions, like, Amy and Donna and Rory but not them because of obvious reasons, and EVERYTHING WILL BE BEAUTIFUL, NOTHING WILL HURT.
You know what, just move the fuck over Moffat, I'll do the writing for you. THANKS.
ALSO, CAN YOU IMAGINE THE SCENE BETWEEN ROSE AND RIVER WHEN THEY FIRST MEET? LISTEN, I AM NOT RIVER'S BIGGEST FAN,B UT THAT WOULD BE EPIC BECAUSE THE BITCH FEST THAT WOULD HAPPEN OH MYG OD AND THERE'S ELEVEN LIKE, "I SERIOUSLY DON'T HOW TO HANDLE THIS SITUATION HELP ME DEAR GOD HELP ME OH LOOK THERE'S A PLANET WITH A WAR GOING ON, I NEED TO GO HELP THEM WHICH INVOLVES BEING THERE AND NOT HERE, GOODBYE."
MAKE IT SO, MOFFAT, MAKE IT THE FUCK SO.
You may now return to your regularly scheduled LJ, now.
I will fucking bludgeon Steven Moffatt with a blonde Barbie that Eleven kisses if Rose Tyler doesn't come back to the show.
he needs Rose. The Doctor NEEDS her, even more than Amy or Donna or River. (And he needs Amy so much more than we can understand, so wow, that's a lot.) And EVERYTHING is pointing back to Rose. EVERYTHING. God. Watching "Hide" was like watching a study in why this fucking OTP makes me want to kill myself, sometimes.
Okay so, I have two theories
1. TenTwo goes fucking batshit crazy as a human, because even though he loves Rose like nobodies business, and even though he's got a bit of Donna inside him, he's meant to be a Time Lord. he's got all that mind, all that knowledge, and it hurts his human brain. That one human heart hurts him. Everything,f ucking everything hurts him, and he misses the TARDIS and being still and having carpets and four fucking walls so much he can't breathe, alright. Rose helped heal him after the Time War, but not even Rose can fix how wrong he is now. So he just goes effing loony loo loo and either kills himself, or becomes the dark, evil bastard we all know the Doctor has the potential to be.
A. There's always the possiblity that TenTwo becomes The Valeyard. We know the Master says "The Valeyard, Doctor, is penultimate reincarnation...Somewhere between your 12th and 13th regenerations." Well, between 12 and 13 is a fucking tiny window of time if you're saying literally while he's leaving 12 and becoming 13, or even while he's 12 or 13 at any point. But the Master could have had it wrong, or even lied, not wanting the Doctor to become aware of when the Valeyard will be born. The Metacrisis Doctor would become so embittered and hateful of his other self, so untrustful that Rose is seeing him and not the actual Doctor, he'd just LOSE HIS BANANAS and get his Valeyard on. GOD. Can you imagine!? David playing AN EVIL DOCTOR!? Fuck yes, can this happen now.
B. We know the Doctor gave Rose and the Metacrisis a part of the TARDIS so they could grow their own. WHAT IF THE VALEYARD IS TRYING TO GET TO ELEVEN TO FUCK HIS ENTIRE LIFE UP AND JUST RUIN HIM AND BE AN EVIL DICK AND ROSE PIGGYBACKS ON HIS TRIP OOOOOOORRRRRRR SOMEHOW GETS THE DIMENSION CANNON OR SOMETHING EQUIVELENT TO WORKING AND IS HEADING TO THE DOCTOR TO WARN HIM WHAT'S HAPPENING AND CLARA IS EMPATH AND SHE'S HONED IN CLARA. Maybe Rose and Clara are related, somehow? I wouldn't know how, but it could happen. Especially in this series.
2. Rose looked into the Heart of the Tardis during "The Parting of Ways", and that Nine sucked out the time vortex that was inside her, thus causing his regeneration. BUT. Do you really buy that he got all of it? That nothing was left, and Rose was UTTERLY UNCHANGED by having it in her!? BECAUSE I DON'T. I mean HOW could it not change her!? So I think in Pete's World Rose and the Metacrisis Doctor live together, and are happy and maybe have babies (awww babies) and have a life, but the Metacrisis gets old and dies, and when Rose kicks the bucket...she fucking regenerates. Oh yeah. How many regenerations will she have? Does she become a Time Lady? Listen, I DON'T KNOW, but having the entirety of eternity laid out before you, God. So lonely.
So Rose, somehow (perhaps with their homegrown TARDIS), begins attempting to get back to her Doctor. She's just as immortal as he is now...they can spend forever together, JUST LIKE SHE PROMISED HIM. And they can have companions and maybe babies and hook up with Jack every once in a while and more awesome companions, like, Amy and Donna and Rory but not them because of obvious reasons, and EVERYTHING WILL BE BEAUTIFUL, NOTHING WILL HURT.
You know what, just move the fuck over Moffat, I'll do the writing for you. THANKS.
ALSO, CAN YOU IMAGINE THE SCENE BETWEEN ROSE AND RIVER WHEN THEY FIRST MEET? LISTEN, I AM NOT RIVER'S BIGGEST FAN,B UT THAT WOULD BE EPIC BECAUSE THE BITCH FEST THAT WOULD HAPPEN OH MYG OD AND THERE'S ELEVEN LIKE, "I SERIOUSLY DON'T HOW TO HANDLE THIS SITUATION HELP ME DEAR GOD HELP ME OH LOOK THERE'S A PLANET WITH A WAR GOING ON, I NEED TO GO HELP THEM WHICH INVOLVES BEING THERE AND NOT HERE, GOODBYE."
MAKE IT SO, MOFFAT, MAKE IT THE FUCK SO.
You may now return to your regularly scheduled LJ, now.