"Most people your age die! Why won't you?"

Thank you, Freakazoid.

What's better than friends with benefits?

Friends with showers!

Fuck you, building!

Thank you, Carol!

Ugh. I HATE CARRIE BRADSHAW! Thought I'd say that now so I don't accidentally say it while going down on someone a la CARRIEBut, while at Wonderland with Marc, two of the rides had separate line ups for singles. Marked "Singles Keep Left" "Singles Line Up Here." Which got me to thinking, though the single line got you to the ride faster, you ( Read more... )

Fun things to come back to:
1. My bed.
2. FREAKAZOID on DVD! How toyetic can you get?
3. Variety on my NanBrose.
4. A lesson in pool.
5. A fun late night. Thank you, Sir!
6. Two cheques!

Less fun things to come back to.
1. A still clogged tub.
2. A job hunt.

The best part about vacation is that's the only time I really get any reading done. Continuing reading Joe Orton's diaries, which includes a friend of his describing the story of Cain and Abel:

It seems that Cain was having trouble with Abel and Abel threatened to tell his father.
So Cain walloped the bastard.
Quite right too.
Cunt.Take that to ( Read more... )

If you're a teenage ho-bag in line for a ride at Canada's Wonderland and you're with your almost-fully-baked-tart friends and no grown ups, why would you communicate by passing notes on Post-its? Unless you were making bitchy comments about people in line. Or your other friends.

It's easier than you think!

First off: Bears. What are they? According to wikipedia and my own laziness, "Bears tend to have hairy bodies and facial hair; some are heavy-set; some project an image of working-class masculinity in their grooming and appearance, though none of these are requirements or unique indicators."


( Read more... )

I guess the upside of having a clogged drain is that it apparently drowns all the cockroaches.

Click to view

I love optimism.

Never trust a woman named Tanya. Or Tonya.

She'll end up sleeping with your boyfriend, or killing your cat, or killing her own baby.

How on Earth did the city of Toronto know that I only wanted four hours of sleep last night? Thank God they sent that construction team to wake me, I forgot to set my alarm ( Read more... )