Dear f-list: Please help me not be fucking offensive (offensiveness follows)
I'm working on not using 'lame' when I don't mean a mobility impairment, because it is offensive to people I care about. But it's hard going, both because it's an ingrained and thoughtless habit, and because I keep going, “That's lame! I mean, uh. That's. Uh.”
(Warning! I am probably going to say “lame” approximately nine million times in this post.)
So my question is, what do I mean when I say 'lame' so that I may say what I mean, rather than saying 'lame'?
UrbanDictionary.com is not terribly helpful, it says *"stupid, unoriginal, or lifeless" and "1. A person, thing, or group that is not cool, tending to be unoriginal. Often marked by the fact that it is out of touch with current trends.""It doesn't move, it needs to be carried; it has no game, etc."**
To some extent, I think I mean "that's an insultingly poor effort,"*** as for example, if I give two paragraphs of feedback on a fic, and get “thanks for reading!” Woah. Lame. I mean, “Thanks for responding!” would at least demonstrate that they were willing to spend a half second acknowledging my effort, or thinking about the sort of recognition I might want.
Another use-case: You write to Captain Ahab's tuna co., asking if they use dolphin-friendly nets. They write back assuring you that they “care about the environment” and give you two fifty-cent off coupons for their product. That's lame. Their response doesn't answer my question, and doesn't demonstrate that they are even interested in lying to me believably.
Does my usage match how people understand this term? Can people suggest a non-offensive alternative?
If you'd like to tell me about how annoying it is that we can't even use metaphors anymore, I care deeply about your thoughts, and would like you to note that mythoughtsonyaoi.com is currently unregistered. ETA: This means: don't tell me.
ETA:
Suggestions from the comments which seem promising for at least some cases!
benet: phoned in
rynia: ridic, ridiculous
sinquepida: bogus
costumegoddess: crap
marinarusalka: half-assed
gloss: obnoxious, lazy
laurashapiro: ineffectual, pathetic, (see her comment, though, which has good points on varying meanings of 'lame' in the vernacular)
derryderrydown: pants
ashenmote: underwhelming.
revena: fail
As you see, we have a rich selection to chose from.
*I just used in a semantically correct way \o/
**Holy shit, look at all that ableism, my god.
***My skanky ableism issues, let me show you them /o\ I swear, I am working on this!
(Warning! I am probably going to say “lame” approximately nine million times in this post.)
So my question is, what do I mean when I say 'lame' so that I may say what I mean, rather than saying 'lame'?
UrbanDictionary.com is not terribly helpful, it says *"stupid, unoriginal, or lifeless" and "1. A person, thing, or group that is not cool, tending to be unoriginal. Often marked by the fact that it is out of touch with current trends.""It doesn't move, it needs to be carried; it has no game, etc."**
To some extent, I think I mean "that's an insultingly poor effort,"*** as for example, if I give two paragraphs of feedback on a fic, and get “thanks for reading!” Woah. Lame. I mean, “Thanks for responding!” would at least demonstrate that they were willing to spend a half second acknowledging my effort, or thinking about the sort of recognition I might want.
Another use-case: You write to Captain Ahab's tuna co., asking if they use dolphin-friendly nets. They write back assuring you that they “care about the environment” and give you two fifty-cent off coupons for their product. That's lame. Their response doesn't answer my question, and doesn't demonstrate that they are even interested in lying to me believably.
Does my usage match how people understand this term? Can people suggest a non-offensive alternative?
If you'd like to tell me about how annoying it is that we can't even use metaphors anymore, I care deeply about your thoughts, and would like you to note that mythoughtsonyaoi.com is currently unregistered. ETA: This means: don't tell me.
ETA:
Suggestions from the comments which seem promising for at least some cases!
benet: phoned in
rynia: ridic, ridiculous
sinquepida: bogus
costumegoddess: crap
marinarusalka: half-assed
gloss: obnoxious, lazy
laurashapiro: ineffectual, pathetic, (see her comment, though, which has good points on varying meanings of 'lame' in the vernacular)
derryderrydown: pants
ashenmote: underwhelming.
revena: fail
As you see, we have a rich selection to chose from.
*I just used in a semantically correct way \o/
**Holy shit, look at all that ableism, my god.
***My skanky ableism issues, let me show you them /o\ I swear, I am working on this!