Paper
I wrote this paper for my comp class and i like the way it turned out. If you read it all thank you. Its about my two brothers.
Life with Boys
“Maybe it makes sense now. Maybe somewhere in all of this there's a reason. Maybe somewhere in all of this there's a why. Maybe somewhere there's that thing that lets you tie it all up with a neat bow and bury it in the backyard. But nothing, not getting angry, not prayers, and not tears, nothing can make something that happened unhappen”. - United States of Leland (2003)
“We need to have a talk with you.”
“I didn’t do anything”, my eleven year old mind thought.
“Let’s go on the porch,” my mom said. “Now, we wanted to tell you that you are going to have a new brother or sister, what do you think?”
“I already have one, I don’t want another one,” I shrieked and ran off crying.
“In that memory atmosphere is more real than incident and everything is simultaneously actual and illusory.” - Dancing At Lughnasa (1991)
When I was three my younger brother, Garrett, was born. The morning I found out about his birth is my earliest memory. I ran down the staircase to the living room in search of my mother. I completely neglected to notice my grandmother standing on the stairs. I almost knocked her over in my urgency to talk to my mom. When she was no where to be found, I ran back up the stairs and my grandmother told me the good news, “You have a new baby brother.”
We drove to the hospital, and I saw my baby brother for the first time. This was the beginning of a very interesting relationship. Throughout my younger years with him, Garrett and I got along fine. We would play together, and do things that most siblings would do together. However, once I became a pre-teen we began to fight. Normally, it is the elder sibling attacking the younger, but in our case, Garrett would harass me.
“To be free, one must give up a part of oneself.” -Hedwig and the Angry Inch (2001)
When my parents told me about the pregnancy, I did not want another Garrett. I also am a selfish big sister. I didn’t want a girl to have to share my stuff and room with. Since that was part of the deal my parents said.
“If we have a boy, he’s sharing a room with Garrett, but if we have a girl, she will share the room with you.” Like that was going to happen!
“We could get bunk beds, wouldn’t that be fun?” The fact that my parents even mentioned me sharing my brand new room with someone else enraged me more than the thought of having another sibling like Garrett around. I couldn’t accept the pregnancy.
“Sometimes I think people don't understand how lonely it is to be a kid, like you don't matter.” - Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004)
My mom works within the school system as a speech therapist, so all of my teachers knew about it when I returned to school in September.
“Aren’t you excited to have a new baby in your family?” they all would ask me.
“No, I liked my family how it was,” I would always reply. How could I be happy going through my hellish middle school years if there is going to be this new baby around that I will have to baby sit and change diapers? My teenage years were going to be ruined due to this bundle of dirty diapers.
“Havin' a kid changes everything. There's burping, the midnight feeding, and the changing.” - Big Fish (2003)
Months passed with me trying to like this idea of a new baby. We found out that it was a boy. Thank God I didn’t have to share my room! I actually enjoyed trying to name him with Garrett and our neighbor who was my age. The three of us decided that Zachary Brian would be the best choice. Garrett wanted his middle name to be Millennium, since he was going to be born into the New Year.
“In five hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes - how do you measure a year in the life?” - RENT (2005)
“I have it arranged that he will be born on January 26th. Do you want to take off school to see your little brother?”
“No, I’m not going to miss school because of that,” I said. And I didn’t miss school.
“Momma: You're my knight in shimmering armor. Did you know that?
Gilbert: I think you mean shining.
Momma: No shimmering. You shimmer, and you glow.” - What’s Eating Gilbert Grape (1993)
January 26, 2000, nobody woke me up to go to school that day. I looked on the news as I woke up, and saw that school was cancelled. I ran down the stairs like I did when I was three. My grandmother wasn’t there. I met my dad in the living room. “Your little brother was born today. Do you want to go to the hospital later on with Garrett and me?”
Of course I did. Walking down to the maternity ward I had no idea what was going to happen. I had flashbacks to the day Garrett was born; seeing the little creature for the first time through the glass window and instantly falling in love. This feeling can not be explained, the only way it can be recreated is if you have your own child, or see the birth of someone who is of your own blood.
“You changed my life. You changed my life, and I've known you four days. This is the start of something really big, but right now, I gotta go.” - Garden State (2004)
We looked at all the infants born in the hospital through the window. My brother was not amongst them. We headed into my mothers room and there I saw my little brother for the first time.
That feeling of love rushed over me again. This little boy who I did not want brought into this life was the cutest creature I had ever seen.
My parents told me that he looks just like me when I was little, except smaller. This brought another weird connection to me with someone who could not even recognize me yet. I was in love with my baby brother. I finally accepted his birth and thought of it as something good.
Having this little brother brought along a new play thing for Garrett and I. Instead of fighting with each other, we fought over who would play with him. The two of us love Zachary. Garrett and I would fight and get on each others nerves, but never in front of the baby.
“Young boys should never be sent to bed... they always wake up a day older.” - Finding Neverland (2004)
Going off to college was an interesting experience. I don’t think Zachary completely understood what was going on. He and my parents came to Pittsburgh with me to move me in. Zac was excited to see my new room. I don’t think he realized that I was not going to live with him anymore. My mom would tell me stories that he was upset he had to go into daycare right before school started because I wasn’t home to watch him, and Garrett was in pre-season for soccer. I also got loving phone calls from him saying “I miss you.”
“I miss you too, Bubby. The picture you drew me for my birthday is hanging on my wall,” I replied. I could not bring myself to put tape over the words I miss you in his six year old writing that was on the back of the drawing.
“It's not about understanding... it's about not giving up!” - What Dreams May Come (1998)
It is also strange that I leave when, for the first time since I was little, Garrett and I get along. We bonded when Garrett decided he was too short to play high school basketball, and joined me on the swim team. He was a freshman who had never dove off the blocks and I, on the other hand was the star of the girls’ team, created an interesting dynamic between us. Since we were forced to be with each other on the rides to school, home from practice, and bus rides to meets, we barely fought anymore. He even made me cry when I found out he asked the junior swimmers what fish was mine so he could sign it “Gary” for my senior night gift. I am one of the only people who calls him Gary, and it touches me that he went through that for a sister who he had never gotten along with.
“I'm sorry, is he bothering you, sir? My brother can be an extremely irritating sort of person.” - Finding Neverland (2004)
My two brothers have had an impact on me. I never really realized how significant both of them have shaped me. Zachary proved to me that something you may not think is the best can really bring wonderful happiness into your life. Garrett taught me that everyone can truly get along. It just may take awhile. Even though we still fight sometimes all three of us together, I love my two brothers and would do anything for either of them.
“If the sky were to suddenly open up, there would be no law, there would be no rule. There would only be you and your memories.” - Donnie Darko (2001)
Life with Boys
“Maybe it makes sense now. Maybe somewhere in all of this there's a reason. Maybe somewhere in all of this there's a why. Maybe somewhere there's that thing that lets you tie it all up with a neat bow and bury it in the backyard. But nothing, not getting angry, not prayers, and not tears, nothing can make something that happened unhappen”. - United States of Leland (2003)
“We need to have a talk with you.”
“I didn’t do anything”, my eleven year old mind thought.
“Let’s go on the porch,” my mom said. “Now, we wanted to tell you that you are going to have a new brother or sister, what do you think?”
“I already have one, I don’t want another one,” I shrieked and ran off crying.
“In that memory atmosphere is more real than incident and everything is simultaneously actual and illusory.” - Dancing At Lughnasa (1991)
When I was three my younger brother, Garrett, was born. The morning I found out about his birth is my earliest memory. I ran down the staircase to the living room in search of my mother. I completely neglected to notice my grandmother standing on the stairs. I almost knocked her over in my urgency to talk to my mom. When she was no where to be found, I ran back up the stairs and my grandmother told me the good news, “You have a new baby brother.”
We drove to the hospital, and I saw my baby brother for the first time. This was the beginning of a very interesting relationship. Throughout my younger years with him, Garrett and I got along fine. We would play together, and do things that most siblings would do together. However, once I became a pre-teen we began to fight. Normally, it is the elder sibling attacking the younger, but in our case, Garrett would harass me.
“To be free, one must give up a part of oneself.” -Hedwig and the Angry Inch (2001)
When my parents told me about the pregnancy, I did not want another Garrett. I also am a selfish big sister. I didn’t want a girl to have to share my stuff and room with. Since that was part of the deal my parents said.
“If we have a boy, he’s sharing a room with Garrett, but if we have a girl, she will share the room with you.” Like that was going to happen!
“We could get bunk beds, wouldn’t that be fun?” The fact that my parents even mentioned me sharing my brand new room with someone else enraged me more than the thought of having another sibling like Garrett around. I couldn’t accept the pregnancy.
“Sometimes I think people don't understand how lonely it is to be a kid, like you don't matter.” - Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004)
My mom works within the school system as a speech therapist, so all of my teachers knew about it when I returned to school in September.
“Aren’t you excited to have a new baby in your family?” they all would ask me.
“No, I liked my family how it was,” I would always reply. How could I be happy going through my hellish middle school years if there is going to be this new baby around that I will have to baby sit and change diapers? My teenage years were going to be ruined due to this bundle of dirty diapers.
“Havin' a kid changes everything. There's burping, the midnight feeding, and the changing.” - Big Fish (2003)
Months passed with me trying to like this idea of a new baby. We found out that it was a boy. Thank God I didn’t have to share my room! I actually enjoyed trying to name him with Garrett and our neighbor who was my age. The three of us decided that Zachary Brian would be the best choice. Garrett wanted his middle name to be Millennium, since he was going to be born into the New Year.
“In five hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes - how do you measure a year in the life?” - RENT (2005)
“I have it arranged that he will be born on January 26th. Do you want to take off school to see your little brother?”
“No, I’m not going to miss school because of that,” I said. And I didn’t miss school.
“Momma: You're my knight in shimmering armor. Did you know that?
Gilbert: I think you mean shining.
Momma: No shimmering. You shimmer, and you glow.” - What’s Eating Gilbert Grape (1993)
January 26, 2000, nobody woke me up to go to school that day. I looked on the news as I woke up, and saw that school was cancelled. I ran down the stairs like I did when I was three. My grandmother wasn’t there. I met my dad in the living room. “Your little brother was born today. Do you want to go to the hospital later on with Garrett and me?”
Of course I did. Walking down to the maternity ward I had no idea what was going to happen. I had flashbacks to the day Garrett was born; seeing the little creature for the first time through the glass window and instantly falling in love. This feeling can not be explained, the only way it can be recreated is if you have your own child, or see the birth of someone who is of your own blood.
“You changed my life. You changed my life, and I've known you four days. This is the start of something really big, but right now, I gotta go.” - Garden State (2004)
We looked at all the infants born in the hospital through the window. My brother was not amongst them. We headed into my mothers room and there I saw my little brother for the first time.
That feeling of love rushed over me again. This little boy who I did not want brought into this life was the cutest creature I had ever seen.
My parents told me that he looks just like me when I was little, except smaller. This brought another weird connection to me with someone who could not even recognize me yet. I was in love with my baby brother. I finally accepted his birth and thought of it as something good.
Having this little brother brought along a new play thing for Garrett and I. Instead of fighting with each other, we fought over who would play with him. The two of us love Zachary. Garrett and I would fight and get on each others nerves, but never in front of the baby.
“Young boys should never be sent to bed... they always wake up a day older.” - Finding Neverland (2004)
Going off to college was an interesting experience. I don’t think Zachary completely understood what was going on. He and my parents came to Pittsburgh with me to move me in. Zac was excited to see my new room. I don’t think he realized that I was not going to live with him anymore. My mom would tell me stories that he was upset he had to go into daycare right before school started because I wasn’t home to watch him, and Garrett was in pre-season for soccer. I also got loving phone calls from him saying “I miss you.”
“I miss you too, Bubby. The picture you drew me for my birthday is hanging on my wall,” I replied. I could not bring myself to put tape over the words I miss you in his six year old writing that was on the back of the drawing.
“It's not about understanding... it's about not giving up!” - What Dreams May Come (1998)
It is also strange that I leave when, for the first time since I was little, Garrett and I get along. We bonded when Garrett decided he was too short to play high school basketball, and joined me on the swim team. He was a freshman who had never dove off the blocks and I, on the other hand was the star of the girls’ team, created an interesting dynamic between us. Since we were forced to be with each other on the rides to school, home from practice, and bus rides to meets, we barely fought anymore. He even made me cry when I found out he asked the junior swimmers what fish was mine so he could sign it “Gary” for my senior night gift. I am one of the only people who calls him Gary, and it touches me that he went through that for a sister who he had never gotten along with.
“I'm sorry, is he bothering you, sir? My brother can be an extremely irritating sort of person.” - Finding Neverland (2004)
My two brothers have had an impact on me. I never really realized how significant both of them have shaped me. Zachary proved to me that something you may not think is the best can really bring wonderful happiness into your life. Garrett taught me that everyone can truly get along. It just may take awhile. Even though we still fight sometimes all three of us together, I love my two brothers and would do anything for either of them.
“If the sky were to suddenly open up, there would be no law, there would be no rule. There would only be you and your memories.” - Donnie Darko (2001)