Halo- Winnix songfic
Title: Halo
Word Count: 1,860
Summary: Nixon thinks about Dick and why he's fallen in love.
Disclaimer: I’m not making any money off of writing this story. It’s entirely fictional and based on the performances given in the HBO miniseries Band of Brothers and not the actual soldiers. I don’t own anything….so please don’t sue me. I wrote it for your enjoyment so…enjoy!
Remember those walls I built?
It wasn’t much of a stretch really. He wasn’t exactly the most emotionally available person to begin with. Soon he’d be attending OCS and he knew what he would be getting into.
There was a war going on. Maybe they weren’t fighting yet…but they would be. While it was good to have connections or acquaintances- having friends was an entirely different matter. The thought of having anything more than that hadn’t even crossed his mind.
So he did what he felt was necessary. He began to build up the walls around his heart. He crafted the façade of casual indifference that had seen him through college and life with a family he couldn’t stand, and a wife he didn’t love. He prepared himself to be emotionally distant from the men he would meet. The soldiers he would serve with.
He wasn’t prepared…not ever…to meet someone like Dick Winters.
Well baby they’re tumbling down. And they didn’t even put up a fight. They didn’t even make a sound.
It had happened the moment they met. Well…at least the moment that Nixon saw him. They had met in the usual way.
Bullshitting with other men before any real work was being done. For Nixon it was all about making the rounds. It was all about sizing the men up.
Most of them were more than a little willing to prattle on about themselves. In every person he met he sensed a sort of nervous energy. That little buzz of uncertainty that even he himself felt. Despite all the confidence he outwardly projected…he was still unsure about the decisions he had made to get to this point.
He’d been laughing with one of the men who’d introduced himself after hearing Lewis’s last name…some other guy from New Jersey….Nixon couldn’t even recall his face.
Because out of the corner of his eye he had seen a soft light gleaming…almost like a halo. Attracted by the promise of its shine- he’d turned.
The man was leaning against the wall- arms crossed and wearing a small smile as he surveyed the room. The halo Nixon had swore he’d seen still hanging around his head of red hair.
His stance wasn’t defensive or cocky- the thought of the man being either of the two felt…wrong somehow. The twitch of his lips was no smirk- but a genuine smile of curiosity and kindness.
Nixon’s feet took him over to the man almost of their own accord. That damn halo sucking him in…
“You’re giving new meaning to the term ‘wallflower’,” he’d joked casually.
The man’s eyes flitted over to him from where they had been staring at the interactions of an officer. His eyes were a soft shade of green…or blue…or grey-Hell Nixon wasn’t sure.
But they were kind and coupled with the lift of the man’s eyebrow- they spoke volumes. Nixon carefully backpedaled.
“Not that you’re like a flower or…anything…I’m Lewis Nixon.” He put on a smile and extended his hand.
The man straightened up his already perfected posture and grasped his hand- adding a little extra warmth to his small smile, “Dick Winters.”
The irony of the cool season that this warm man was named after wasn’t lost on him.
Even his hand was warm, or maybe Nixon’s was just cold. Either option made sense…like that little fact told him something about the man…about himself.
When they had met….there had been no nervous buzz. Not in himself…not in Dick.
Not anymore.
I found a way to let you in…but I never really had a doubt. Standing in the light of your halo…I got my angel now.
It was almost too hard to believe. Everything he had set out to do…all his plans to stay distant, to stay separate…all shot to Hell.
In OCS no one could really understand what drew the two of them together. To say that they were different would be a waste of breath…it was obvious to anyone with at least two of their senses how different he and Dick were.
Personally…he had no idea what exactly it was that Dick saw of value in him. There was a time in his life where Lewis had thought he was pretty special. It was what he’d been raised to believe. That he was good looking and intelligent. That he was something all right.
But things like that didn’t matter with Dick Winters. A man who measured intelligence differently than Lewis ever had. Someone who cared more about the soul of a man rather than his pedigree. A man who was everything that Nixon wasn’t and had never before realized that he wanted to be.
Nixon may never know what it was that Dick gained from their friendship but he was sure that it was obvious to all what he gained.
It’s like I’ve been awakened….every rule I had you breaking. It’s the risk that I’m taking. I ain’t never gonna shut you out..
It was bad enough that he had let his defenses down enough to let Dick take a serious hold of him. Of his heart. But then Easy Company had happened.
Dick loved his men. He showed them compassion, fairness and respect. And from what Nixon had seen- his platoon returned the sentiments.
Somehow…Nixon had found himself following Dick’s lead. He found himself caring about the enlisted men on a personal level.
In all the time he spent with the man…he found that it was just Dick’s way. He probably had no idea just how much of an impact he made on the people around him.
He was a man of virtue surrounded by men of vice- none with more than Lewis himself.
If even a small portion of Dick’s virtue could rub off on him…then he knew he could be more. He could be more than just the compilation of his bad habits. He could be good too.
Even if it meant breaking every rule he’d set for himself…he knew he’d never stop following Dick. Even if it broke his heart in the end…the way that even the thought of something happening to Dick did…he could never turn this man out of his heart.
Everywhere I’m looking now…I’m surrounded by your embrace. Baby I can see your halo…you know you’re my saving grace.
He’d offered him a drink once. The moment that he had done it he’d felt stupid.
Not because he thought Dick would be offended. No…he was too understanding for that.
It was because he had wanted Dick to bring him up to his level…not for him to be drug down by Nixon. He knew that it wasn’t as if one little drink would shatter the world around him. Because it wouldn’t…
Dick wasn’t a child…one drink wasn’t going to kill him. But Nixon never wanted to be the person to try and corrupt the other man’s morals. No matter how much he joked about it.
It hadn’t mattered anyway. Dick had declined the drink with a small smile and those eyes that spoke volumes.
Dick didn’t judge him. He just smiled and continued to write. They bantered back and forth- the jolt of the train they were riding easy to ignore when they were with one another.
He took a drink of the liquor he had offered Dick. The other man’s eyes watching him with an affectionate smile in their depths- the warmth of which surrounded and embraced Nixon.
Soothing any fears he had about where this train was taking them…what it would mean for their futures.
It was hard to be afraid when he was with Dick…hard to be scared of self deprecating or ashamed. Because he just felt happy.
The alcohol’s fuzzy burn in the pit of his stomach was no match for the way Dick made him feel.
He made him feel saved.
You’re everything I need and more. It’s written all over your face. Baby I can feel your halo…pray it won’t fade away.
D-day had, of course, been insanity.
The sounds, the sights, the utter and total chaos of war. It was almost too much. But he knew all the plans…and he attempted all throughout that day to remember the big picture.
It was hard. Because all he wanted to know was where Dick was. If he was alright. If he was alive.
The last thought would stop him in his tracks. Because he knew…if Dick was dead…he knew he would feel it.
That was when he realized…on that Day of Days…that was when he realized that he loved Dick. Really, truly loved him. Not like a friend, not like a brother.
He loved him more than his wife, than his parents, Hell he loved Dick more than his kid…which was scary.
And he knew it too. Because with every shot he heard fired he thought of Dick. Of everything that he was to Nixon..of everything that he meant to him.
And every time he thought about being scared..if even for a moment…he would imagine Dick’s face.
Dick got him through that day…he was his strength and his bravery…he was his angel on his shoulder whether Dick ever knew it or not.
He knew Dick was alive…because his heart hadn’t turned to stone, and the Earth hadn’t stopped moving, and the sun was still hanging in the sky.
He knew Dick was alive because he could still feel him…even though they were apart.
Hit me like a ray of sun…burning through my darkest night. You’re the only one that I want…think I’m addicted to your light.
It had felt like forever….even though the day was hardly over. All the time spent worrying about the man he had only realized he loved…
Of course Easy Company had been spread all over and Meehan was missing Nixon had discovered.
And Winters?
Well he was just fine. He’d lead Easy on a successful assault on a series of German guns.
The knowledge had relieved him so greatly he had almost dropped to the ground. Now that he knew where Dick was…that he was alive. Things didn’t have to seem so horrible…the day didn’t have to seem so dark.
Of course knowing he was safe and seeing him with his own two eyes were entirely different.
When the tank rolled through the streets and Nixon spotted him-he forced the operator to stop.
Maybe to Germans or civilians all American soldiers looked the same. But give him a crowd of one million soldiers and he would spot Dick the first time every time. It was easy.
He was the one with the halo.
“Going my way?”
“Sure.”
I swore I’d never fall again…but this don’t even feel like falling. Gravity can’t forget…to pull me to the ground again.
Dick was nothing he ever expected to find in a time of war. He was unconditional love, honest virtue, and a never ending ray of sunshine on the face of a man who had been kept too long in darkness.
Dick was Nixon’s angel. As long as they were together…he could survive anything this war brought on.
I can feel your halo…halo…
Word Count: 1,860
Summary: Nixon thinks about Dick and why he's fallen in love.
Disclaimer: I’m not making any money off of writing this story. It’s entirely fictional and based on the performances given in the HBO miniseries Band of Brothers and not the actual soldiers. I don’t own anything….so please don’t sue me. I wrote it for your enjoyment so…enjoy!
Remember those walls I built?
It wasn’t much of a stretch really. He wasn’t exactly the most emotionally available person to begin with. Soon he’d be attending OCS and he knew what he would be getting into.
There was a war going on. Maybe they weren’t fighting yet…but they would be. While it was good to have connections or acquaintances- having friends was an entirely different matter. The thought of having anything more than that hadn’t even crossed his mind.
So he did what he felt was necessary. He began to build up the walls around his heart. He crafted the façade of casual indifference that had seen him through college and life with a family he couldn’t stand, and a wife he didn’t love. He prepared himself to be emotionally distant from the men he would meet. The soldiers he would serve with.
He wasn’t prepared…not ever…to meet someone like Dick Winters.
Well baby they’re tumbling down. And they didn’t even put up a fight. They didn’t even make a sound.
It had happened the moment they met. Well…at least the moment that Nixon saw him. They had met in the usual way.
Bullshitting with other men before any real work was being done. For Nixon it was all about making the rounds. It was all about sizing the men up.
Most of them were more than a little willing to prattle on about themselves. In every person he met he sensed a sort of nervous energy. That little buzz of uncertainty that even he himself felt. Despite all the confidence he outwardly projected…he was still unsure about the decisions he had made to get to this point.
He’d been laughing with one of the men who’d introduced himself after hearing Lewis’s last name…some other guy from New Jersey….Nixon couldn’t even recall his face.
Because out of the corner of his eye he had seen a soft light gleaming…almost like a halo. Attracted by the promise of its shine- he’d turned.
The man was leaning against the wall- arms crossed and wearing a small smile as he surveyed the room. The halo Nixon had swore he’d seen still hanging around his head of red hair.
His stance wasn’t defensive or cocky- the thought of the man being either of the two felt…wrong somehow. The twitch of his lips was no smirk- but a genuine smile of curiosity and kindness.
Nixon’s feet took him over to the man almost of their own accord. That damn halo sucking him in…
“You’re giving new meaning to the term ‘wallflower’,” he’d joked casually.
The man’s eyes flitted over to him from where they had been staring at the interactions of an officer. His eyes were a soft shade of green…or blue…or grey-Hell Nixon wasn’t sure.
But they were kind and coupled with the lift of the man’s eyebrow- they spoke volumes. Nixon carefully backpedaled.
“Not that you’re like a flower or…anything…I’m Lewis Nixon.” He put on a smile and extended his hand.
The man straightened up his already perfected posture and grasped his hand- adding a little extra warmth to his small smile, “Dick Winters.”
The irony of the cool season that this warm man was named after wasn’t lost on him.
Even his hand was warm, or maybe Nixon’s was just cold. Either option made sense…like that little fact told him something about the man…about himself.
When they had met….there had been no nervous buzz. Not in himself…not in Dick.
Not anymore.
I found a way to let you in…but I never really had a doubt. Standing in the light of your halo…I got my angel now.
It was almost too hard to believe. Everything he had set out to do…all his plans to stay distant, to stay separate…all shot to Hell.
In OCS no one could really understand what drew the two of them together. To say that they were different would be a waste of breath…it was obvious to anyone with at least two of their senses how different he and Dick were.
Personally…he had no idea what exactly it was that Dick saw of value in him. There was a time in his life where Lewis had thought he was pretty special. It was what he’d been raised to believe. That he was good looking and intelligent. That he was something all right.
But things like that didn’t matter with Dick Winters. A man who measured intelligence differently than Lewis ever had. Someone who cared more about the soul of a man rather than his pedigree. A man who was everything that Nixon wasn’t and had never before realized that he wanted to be.
Nixon may never know what it was that Dick gained from their friendship but he was sure that it was obvious to all what he gained.
It’s like I’ve been awakened….every rule I had you breaking. It’s the risk that I’m taking. I ain’t never gonna shut you out..
It was bad enough that he had let his defenses down enough to let Dick take a serious hold of him. Of his heart. But then Easy Company had happened.
Dick loved his men. He showed them compassion, fairness and respect. And from what Nixon had seen- his platoon returned the sentiments.
Somehow…Nixon had found himself following Dick’s lead. He found himself caring about the enlisted men on a personal level.
In all the time he spent with the man…he found that it was just Dick’s way. He probably had no idea just how much of an impact he made on the people around him.
He was a man of virtue surrounded by men of vice- none with more than Lewis himself.
If even a small portion of Dick’s virtue could rub off on him…then he knew he could be more. He could be more than just the compilation of his bad habits. He could be good too.
Even if it meant breaking every rule he’d set for himself…he knew he’d never stop following Dick. Even if it broke his heart in the end…the way that even the thought of something happening to Dick did…he could never turn this man out of his heart.
Everywhere I’m looking now…I’m surrounded by your embrace. Baby I can see your halo…you know you’re my saving grace.
He’d offered him a drink once. The moment that he had done it he’d felt stupid.
Not because he thought Dick would be offended. No…he was too understanding for that.
It was because he had wanted Dick to bring him up to his level…not for him to be drug down by Nixon. He knew that it wasn’t as if one little drink would shatter the world around him. Because it wouldn’t…
Dick wasn’t a child…one drink wasn’t going to kill him. But Nixon never wanted to be the person to try and corrupt the other man’s morals. No matter how much he joked about it.
It hadn’t mattered anyway. Dick had declined the drink with a small smile and those eyes that spoke volumes.
Dick didn’t judge him. He just smiled and continued to write. They bantered back and forth- the jolt of the train they were riding easy to ignore when they were with one another.
He took a drink of the liquor he had offered Dick. The other man’s eyes watching him with an affectionate smile in their depths- the warmth of which surrounded and embraced Nixon.
Soothing any fears he had about where this train was taking them…what it would mean for their futures.
It was hard to be afraid when he was with Dick…hard to be scared of self deprecating or ashamed. Because he just felt happy.
The alcohol’s fuzzy burn in the pit of his stomach was no match for the way Dick made him feel.
He made him feel saved.
You’re everything I need and more. It’s written all over your face. Baby I can feel your halo…pray it won’t fade away.
D-day had, of course, been insanity.
The sounds, the sights, the utter and total chaos of war. It was almost too much. But he knew all the plans…and he attempted all throughout that day to remember the big picture.
It was hard. Because all he wanted to know was where Dick was. If he was alright. If he was alive.
The last thought would stop him in his tracks. Because he knew…if Dick was dead…he knew he would feel it.
That was when he realized…on that Day of Days…that was when he realized that he loved Dick. Really, truly loved him. Not like a friend, not like a brother.
He loved him more than his wife, than his parents, Hell he loved Dick more than his kid…which was scary.
And he knew it too. Because with every shot he heard fired he thought of Dick. Of everything that he was to Nixon..of everything that he meant to him.
And every time he thought about being scared..if even for a moment…he would imagine Dick’s face.
Dick got him through that day…he was his strength and his bravery…he was his angel on his shoulder whether Dick ever knew it or not.
He knew Dick was alive…because his heart hadn’t turned to stone, and the Earth hadn’t stopped moving, and the sun was still hanging in the sky.
He knew Dick was alive because he could still feel him…even though they were apart.
Hit me like a ray of sun…burning through my darkest night. You’re the only one that I want…think I’m addicted to your light.
It had felt like forever….even though the day was hardly over. All the time spent worrying about the man he had only realized he loved…
Of course Easy Company had been spread all over and Meehan was missing Nixon had discovered.
And Winters?
Well he was just fine. He’d lead Easy on a successful assault on a series of German guns.
The knowledge had relieved him so greatly he had almost dropped to the ground. Now that he knew where Dick was…that he was alive. Things didn’t have to seem so horrible…the day didn’t have to seem so dark.
Of course knowing he was safe and seeing him with his own two eyes were entirely different.
When the tank rolled through the streets and Nixon spotted him-he forced the operator to stop.
Maybe to Germans or civilians all American soldiers looked the same. But give him a crowd of one million soldiers and he would spot Dick the first time every time. It was easy.
He was the one with the halo.
“Going my way?”
“Sure.”
I swore I’d never fall again…but this don’t even feel like falling. Gravity can’t forget…to pull me to the ground again.
Dick was nothing he ever expected to find in a time of war. He was unconditional love, honest virtue, and a never ending ray of sunshine on the face of a man who had been kept too long in darkness.
Dick was Nixon’s angel. As long as they were together…he could survive anything this war brought on.
I can feel your halo…halo…