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[bubbly_bertha]

My mother wrote me today.

Bertha love,

I have heard from someone that you appear to not have lost weight. This greatly disappoints me. Like I said in my last letter do not bother coming home if you have not lost weight. Lose a few pounds or you are not welcome at my house. I have also been informed by your father that I will have people of tainted

Comments

[buff_hufflepuff]

*has just come in from his snow!snogging with Emmeline*

*shakes the snow out of his hair and grins with a flushed face*

Oh, hey, Bertha -- ?

*breaks off when he sees her face*

What's wrong?

[bubbly_bertha]

*wordlessly hands him the letter*

[buff_hufflepuff]

*reads the letter quickly, eyebrows shooting up with disgust*

That's - just - *doesn't know what to say*

...

She's fond of me?

[bubbly_bertha]

*sighs* Horrible, no?

*lips quirk into a small small* Oh yes! She loves you. Thinks you're a handsome devil.

[vancealot]

I've some pillows you can shove under your dress, if you'd like.

[bubbly_bertha]

*puzzled look* What'll that do?

[vancealot]

It'll make you the size your mother seems to think you are. Or bigger, which would be, in my opinion, a bonus.

[bubbly_bertha]

Oh! What a good idea! She might not let me out of my room if I look fat, though... Hmm.

[hunting_realism]

*laughs*

How is it that our mums aren't best friends? They're very much alike.

[bubbly_bertha]

*grins*

They probably have different tastes in tea. My mother is always complaining about how she can't have certain women as friends because their tastes in tea differ. She's so very batty.

[hunting_realism]

Ah, that's probably it. *smiles* My mum drinks chamomile tea drowned in honey. Which is actually really disgusting, now that I think of it.

Tea should only be served as Earl Grey, room temperature, with a splash of milk. *nods matter of factly*

[bubbly_bertha]

My mum drinks mint tea with a bit of pumpkin juice. It's so gross. Our mothers belong in a mental ward just for their insane taste in tea.

I'm not really a big fan of tea. I prefer hot cocoa.

[bubbly_bertha]

*nods*

*eyes widen* I really shouldn't... Bugger it. *takes chocolate bar* Thankies.

Amos, the twit, said carrot sticks covered in chocolate. *rolls eyes* Chocolate is wayyy better!

I have no idea why she does. Oh yes she knows him. Think he's a charming boy. By that I'm sure she means a bloody brat that we all seem to love. *grins*

[buff_hufflepuff]

=P

[kinnonme]

Tell your mum to take her fat mouth and shove it up her fat arse.

Bertha, you're gorgeous. And don't let anyone, anyone, tell you otherwise.

[bubbly_bertha]

*bites lip*

I know. My mum is just crazy obsessed with me looking like, what she thinks, is perfect.

[kinnonme]

What if you just not go? Bugger your mum, come to my house!

[bubbly_bertha]

I'd love to not go. But I've already invited tons of people. And I told Benjy I'd stay with him over the Holiday.

OOOH! Could you get word out to the 7th years in your house that they're all invited. I'm doing everything I can to ruin the ball for my mum.