A Mother's Heart (Challenge)
Rating: PG-13
Characters: Joyce, Buffy, Faith
Emotion: Distressed
Spoilers: Takes place after 'Enemies'.
Summary: Joyce's thoughts on Faith's betrayal.
Monster, how should I feel?
Creatures lie here, looking through the window.
- 'Monster' by Meg n Dia
Joyce waited up for her daughter, as usual. She and Angel had filled her in on their plan to dupe Faith into revealing the Mayor's plan. She knew that Buffy was capable and intelligent, but she didn't agree with the idea at all. The younger girl was in a fragile state, and two wrongs didn't make a right.
When she'd answered the door and let them inside, she saw the hesitation in Faith's eyes before the brunette averted her gaze completely. She'd always seemed a little uncomfortable in her presence. Joyce got the impression that mothers made the young girl wary. From the vague details Buffy had told her, Faith's own mother had been an alcoholic, and was now dead.
Even if she was the enemy, her heart went out to her.
It was hard to watch Faith walk unknowingly into their trap. Buffy swore the information was vital and it was a life-or-death situation. Still, she noticed the extra bounce in Faith's step when she came back downstairs with her daughter in tow. That's how it always was. Faith would appear so guarded and the moment Buffy was around, she perked up.
Joyce wasn't as oblivious as her daughter was. Maybe it was from years of studying the minute details in the art that hung in her gallery, or maybe it was mother's intuition, but she'd become very good at reading people. And what she saw in Faith made her heart break. She saw the way the younger girl would look at Buffy with such adoration and sometimes obvious jealousy. More often then not, it was a look of both admiration and hurt.
At Christmas, when it was just her and Faith alone for the evening, they'd bonded a little. Joyce had opened the small gift the girl had gotten her. It was a bracelet. It wasn't worth much and had obviously been bought in haste, but to Joyce it was priceless. Faith had blushed crimson when Joyce had unwrapped it and again muttered the disclaimer that 'it was cheap'. The older woman had smiled warmly and pulled the girl into a hug that she obviously didn't expect.
"It's absolutely beautiful, dear. Thank you so much."
She felt the girl stiffen in surprise before awkwardly returning it. "You're welcome, Mrs. S," she'd said.
Joyce then gave Faith the present she'd bought for her. Faith looked shocked at receiving one and assured her that she didn't need to get her one. "You really shouldn't have, I didn't... I mean, I don't..."
"Oh shush, honey. It's Christmas. Go ahead and open it."
Faith tore into the gift like it was the first one she'd ever gotten. Maybe it was. She handled the sterling silver cross pendant like it was made of 14 karat gold. Her wide eyes took in the sight of the gift before turning to Joyce.
"It... It's beautiful..."
Joyce had grinned before helping her to put it on. "I want you girls to be safe when you're out there saving the world. I know another Slayer is the best protection in the world, but I'll sleep better at night knowing there's a little something extra keeping you safe."
Faith had fingered the tiny cross with what may have been tears in her eyes for a moment. Then, for the first time since they'd met, Joyce saw a small but sincere smile and nod of gratitude, and she knew she'd broken down at least one of Faith's many barriers.
So to send the girl to the wolves, even if it was her own daughter, was hard. Faith hadn't been wearing the necklace Joyce had given her, but she wondered if she had noticed that the older woman still wore the bracelet.
Later that night, Buffy came home looking broken and exhausted. She attempted to offer her mother a small, tired smile, but couldn't quite do it.
"Did it work?"
She saw her daughter's eyes grow bright with un-shed tears as she nodded. Joyce sighed and opened her arms. Buffy fell into them quickly and the sobs came immediately after. She smoothed back her daughter's hair and rubbed her back reassuringly.
"She hates me, mom. She hates me. She has for a while," Buffy choked out.
Joyce closed her eyes and bit back another sigh.
"Faith is a very lost, very confused girl, Buffy. I know she's angry. She has a lot of that in her. But I don't think she hates you. I think she envies you, and she's angry with you. But she doesn't hate you."
"She held a knife to my throat! She would've tortured me if she had the chance!"
Joyce's heart blossomed with anger for a moment.
"I don't condone her actions. But given the chance, I don't think she would have hurt you. I think she wanted you to get your attention. For you to listen."
Buffy pulled away after a moment and wiped the tears away, smearing her mascara. With her eyes rimmed with dark makeup and her hair tousled from the fight, Joyce could see for one terrifying moment just how easily Buffy could have wound up in Faith's position. If she had become an alcoholic after her and Hank's ugly divorce, and he already an absent father. Without Willow and Xander's friendship, how she could become so isolated, having to carry the burden of being a Slayer all by herself.
"I'm going to bed, mom. Make sure the house is locked up, okay? Locks wouldn't do much to keep a Slayer out, but it's better than nothing," Buffy murmured, her voice sounding raspy.
Joyce nodded. "Okay. Goodnight, honey."
She watched her daughter walk away with the weight of the world on her shoulders. It was devastating. For a few months, Buffy's shoulders had seemed lighter since she had someone to share the burden with.
As Joyce locked the doors and the windows, she wondered where Faith was now and who might be comforting her. If there was anyone to tell her that Buffy didn't hate her. That they knew that Faith was lost and had made mistakes, but it didn't have to be this way. Joyce cursed herself for not interrupting their plan and pulling Faith aside herself to tell her those things.
She turned off the lights before heading upstairs to her room. She was fairly sure she heard crying coming from Buffy's room, but she knew that she would come to her mother if she needed her. Sometimes you just needed to mourn in private, and Joyce could respect that.
After entering her room, Joyce walked over to her nightstand opened her jewelery box. She removed the bracelet from her wrist and put it inside, studying it a moment before putting the box away. She wondered if Faith had kept the necklace or pawned it off. She didn't blame her if she did. The girl was far too skinny, and she often wondered where she got the money to feed herself or pay rent.
So many questions that should have been asked and never were. So many times a parent or friend was needed and was absent. So many failures on both sides.
Joyce fell asleep with a heavy heart that night, and tears that matched her daughter's.
Characters: Joyce, Buffy, Faith
Emotion: Distressed
Spoilers: Takes place after 'Enemies'.
Summary: Joyce's thoughts on Faith's betrayal.
Monster, how should I feel?
Creatures lie here, looking through the window.
- 'Monster' by Meg n Dia
Joyce waited up for her daughter, as usual. She and Angel had filled her in on their plan to dupe Faith into revealing the Mayor's plan. She knew that Buffy was capable and intelligent, but she didn't agree with the idea at all. The younger girl was in a fragile state, and two wrongs didn't make a right.
When she'd answered the door and let them inside, she saw the hesitation in Faith's eyes before the brunette averted her gaze completely. She'd always seemed a little uncomfortable in her presence. Joyce got the impression that mothers made the young girl wary. From the vague details Buffy had told her, Faith's own mother had been an alcoholic, and was now dead.
Even if she was the enemy, her heart went out to her.
It was hard to watch Faith walk unknowingly into their trap. Buffy swore the information was vital and it was a life-or-death situation. Still, she noticed the extra bounce in Faith's step when she came back downstairs with her daughter in tow. That's how it always was. Faith would appear so guarded and the moment Buffy was around, she perked up.
Joyce wasn't as oblivious as her daughter was. Maybe it was from years of studying the minute details in the art that hung in her gallery, or maybe it was mother's intuition, but she'd become very good at reading people. And what she saw in Faith made her heart break. She saw the way the younger girl would look at Buffy with such adoration and sometimes obvious jealousy. More often then not, it was a look of both admiration and hurt.
At Christmas, when it was just her and Faith alone for the evening, they'd bonded a little. Joyce had opened the small gift the girl had gotten her. It was a bracelet. It wasn't worth much and had obviously been bought in haste, but to Joyce it was priceless. Faith had blushed crimson when Joyce had unwrapped it and again muttered the disclaimer that 'it was cheap'. The older woman had smiled warmly and pulled the girl into a hug that she obviously didn't expect.
"It's absolutely beautiful, dear. Thank you so much."
She felt the girl stiffen in surprise before awkwardly returning it. "You're welcome, Mrs. S," she'd said.
Joyce then gave Faith the present she'd bought for her. Faith looked shocked at receiving one and assured her that she didn't need to get her one. "You really shouldn't have, I didn't... I mean, I don't..."
"Oh shush, honey. It's Christmas. Go ahead and open it."
Faith tore into the gift like it was the first one she'd ever gotten. Maybe it was. She handled the sterling silver cross pendant like it was made of 14 karat gold. Her wide eyes took in the sight of the gift before turning to Joyce.
"It... It's beautiful..."
Joyce had grinned before helping her to put it on. "I want you girls to be safe when you're out there saving the world. I know another Slayer is the best protection in the world, but I'll sleep better at night knowing there's a little something extra keeping you safe."
Faith had fingered the tiny cross with what may have been tears in her eyes for a moment. Then, for the first time since they'd met, Joyce saw a small but sincere smile and nod of gratitude, and she knew she'd broken down at least one of Faith's many barriers.
So to send the girl to the wolves, even if it was her own daughter, was hard. Faith hadn't been wearing the necklace Joyce had given her, but she wondered if she had noticed that the older woman still wore the bracelet.
Later that night, Buffy came home looking broken and exhausted. She attempted to offer her mother a small, tired smile, but couldn't quite do it.
"Did it work?"
She saw her daughter's eyes grow bright with un-shed tears as she nodded. Joyce sighed and opened her arms. Buffy fell into them quickly and the sobs came immediately after. She smoothed back her daughter's hair and rubbed her back reassuringly.
"She hates me, mom. She hates me. She has for a while," Buffy choked out.
Joyce closed her eyes and bit back another sigh.
"Faith is a very lost, very confused girl, Buffy. I know she's angry. She has a lot of that in her. But I don't think she hates you. I think she envies you, and she's angry with you. But she doesn't hate you."
"She held a knife to my throat! She would've tortured me if she had the chance!"
Joyce's heart blossomed with anger for a moment.
"I don't condone her actions. But given the chance, I don't think she would have hurt you. I think she wanted you to get your attention. For you to listen."
Buffy pulled away after a moment and wiped the tears away, smearing her mascara. With her eyes rimmed with dark makeup and her hair tousled from the fight, Joyce could see for one terrifying moment just how easily Buffy could have wound up in Faith's position. If she had become an alcoholic after her and Hank's ugly divorce, and he already an absent father. Without Willow and Xander's friendship, how she could become so isolated, having to carry the burden of being a Slayer all by herself.
"I'm going to bed, mom. Make sure the house is locked up, okay? Locks wouldn't do much to keep a Slayer out, but it's better than nothing," Buffy murmured, her voice sounding raspy.
Joyce nodded. "Okay. Goodnight, honey."
She watched her daughter walk away with the weight of the world on her shoulders. It was devastating. For a few months, Buffy's shoulders had seemed lighter since she had someone to share the burden with.
As Joyce locked the doors and the windows, she wondered where Faith was now and who might be comforting her. If there was anyone to tell her that Buffy didn't hate her. That they knew that Faith was lost and had made mistakes, but it didn't have to be this way. Joyce cursed herself for not interrupting their plan and pulling Faith aside herself to tell her those things.
She turned off the lights before heading upstairs to her room. She was fairly sure she heard crying coming from Buffy's room, but she knew that she would come to her mother if she needed her. Sometimes you just needed to mourn in private, and Joyce could respect that.
After entering her room, Joyce walked over to her nightstand opened her jewelery box. She removed the bracelet from her wrist and put it inside, studying it a moment before putting the box away. She wondered if Faith had kept the necklace or pawned it off. She didn't blame her if she did. The girl was far too skinny, and she often wondered where she got the money to feed herself or pay rent.
So many questions that should have been asked and never were. So many times a parent or friend was needed and was absent. So many failures on both sides.
Joyce fell asleep with a heavy heart that night, and tears that matched her daughter's.