Utopia - BBM drabble/one-shot

[buffymonmon]

This is something I wrote a couple of days ago as a contest entry. I used other names for the characters but it was Ennis and Jack I was thinking of, so I have changed them back for this post so that "the tent look right". This is my reply to those who voted yes to Prop 8.

Comments

[1_shot_thing]

Wow. Really powerful and well written. I can feel the heat and the sand. I love your clever wording with the subtle nods to canon. Really wonderful piece.

(I'm in California, so this truly hits me where I live)

Great writing.

Hugs,

Marissa :)

[buffymonmon]

Thanks for reading and commenting, Marissa. Proposition 8 withstanding, it feels good to know that there are so many californians like yourself out there. Have a great week!

[rt_in_town]

Another word that Ennis doesn´t fully understand, but he sees the hurt it causes in his friend´s eyes. He likes the other word, now buried beneath the sand, better. He clears his throat.Such a gorgeous meditation on a sad circumstance. For a moment, we are all transported into the still, inner workings of the souls of these mystery cowboys on the plains; the outcome of a days' work at the ballot box is conflated with the centuries old tale of hope, dust and disappointment that has been native to the Old West since its primal settlement. Looking at these two denizens of the landscape as you pass by, no one would guess that they would ever give a damn about a vote in California over gay marriage. And yet, you make us pause to regard them, to peer into their minds so that we see how even these men in a distant and far off land are hit to the core by the news.... because it really is not just in the ghettos of Californian cities, but among men and women of all ranks, stations and places in America that who feel the vindictive injury of

[buffymonmon]

Thanks for the kind words! I always love your comments because you seem to understand what I´m trying to say almost better than myself.

" because it really is not just in the ghettos of Californian cities, but among men and women of all ranks, stations and places in America that who feel the vindictive injury of this law."

All over the world even, I´d imagine.

thanks for reading!

[torry28]

I could not say it any better then rt_in _town did, this drabble tells of more then just casting a vote on a ballot. I live in Calif. too, and I'm very sad about what is happening here.
Thank you for writing this.
Torry

[buffymonmon]

thanks you for reading, Torry. let´s hope things will change for the better soon.

[ramona4jake]

I wish a place like Utopia exists... and where shit like that proposition cannot be !
Thank you, this was very good !

[brokeback1963]

Pretty powerful, sad and gorgeous. I love it.

**
"Well, we are´t even living anywhere near there anyways, so I guess…"

Ennis removes his gloves, takes his friend´s hand and brings it to his own sandy lips.
"Sorry. Wish I could change the world for you. Would if I could."
**
Sun or no sun, he promises himself to remember that word because even though he can´t see it anymore, and he might not ever see it again, he still likes it for some reason. Gives him hope
**

WOW!! Thank you for this.

Tammy.

[buffymonmon]

very happy that you enjoyed it, Tammy! Have a nice week!