Bad Chuck ( Read more... )

Bad scene.

Everybody's fault.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20081225/ap_on_re_eu/eu_britain_obit_pinterRead more... )

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I heard there is no Christmas ( Read more... )

I hate the fact that there has never been a single TV show whose writers had the balls NOT to make every Christmas episode a fucking explosion of puppies and rainbows and butterfly kisses. Christmas episodes are, without exception, disappointing, boring, frustrating, and TOTALLY fucking lame. When my revolution comes, Christmas episodes will be ( Read more... )

Running on two hours of sleep, plus whatever scattered bits of awkward nappage I managed to grab on the plane, plus the weakest peanut butter sandwich I've ever had. It's been a long fucking week ( Read more... )

I've gotten to this point in my life where my failures are no longer hilarious, and it's really a problem for me. Because I used to fail at everything in the most epic way possible, so I was comfortable with the fact that I'd failed because at least I did it in fucking style. And I'd always get a really good story out of it and it was kind of my ( Read more... )

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20081217/ap_on_fe_st/odd_hitler_cake

3-year old named Adolph Hitler denied birthday cake by supermarket; Parents exasperated, confused, and completely fucking retarded

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I'm in Kingwood now. My phone took a little trip and it's now in a car in Omaha, a basement in Minneapolis, or a car in Chicago. It's a magical travelling phone and I want to make a kid's movie about its adventures. I'll bet it witnesses a murder ( Read more... )