Fic - TMNT- The Hamato/Whitmire comedy hour
Title: THE HAMATO/WHITMIRE COMEDY HOUR
Fandom: TMNT-FRAGMENT'verse
Rating: R - words and situations
Genre: 1 sentence set
Summary: 50 sentences dealing with the many levels of Raph and Paul .... if you don't know who I mean by Paul yet ... look into the fragment universe ... here
#01 - Motion
It was ridiculous, really, how a creature that seemed so heavy and bulky could float through silent movements like water in a stream.
#02 - Cool
Raph laughingly told him that turtles didn’t sweat, then placed a cool hand against the detective’s over-heated skin, and the vulgar retort hung up somewhere in his throat.
#03 - Young
Whitmire was often reminded how young the mutants actually were each time he called Raphael a punk, and it was promptly suggested that he ‘suck shit through a tube’.
#04 - Last
Often he would sit alone and watch the two turtles slink away into the night, then Miller would call his goodbye and turn the corner … and Paul Whitmire would wonder just what the fuck he was doing.
#05 - Wrong
He supposed most people would have freaked out and screamed for the FBI, and he might still … because surely it wasn’t right to feel so comfortable around a five foot tall talking turtle armed with pointy objects.
#06 - Gentle
Three bulky fingers on each hand instead of five, yet they moved with the utmost care pulling the bandage tight around his shin.
#07 - One
Whitmire had told him once that he was the only person left in his family, so he should shut the fuck up about his brothers and enjoy them while they were still here.
#08 - Thousand
Raph asked Paul for a grand once, to get a new bike, and Whitmire had smiled brightly and told him to ‘suck shit through a tube’.
#09 - King
When Raph learned Whitmire had a phobia of rats, he took great pleasure in meticulously recounting each encounter with the rat king … just to make the steadfast cop shiver a little.
#10 - Learn
“I don’t see why I gotta be the one to teach you this shit, Raph … and I swear to God if you do the ‘help me Obi-Wan Kenobi’ thing ONE more time, I will bitch-slap you into next week … now turn over.”
#11 - Blur
It was a lightening quick motion, and there’s a chance that he was delusional from blood loss … but he’s pretty sure that Raphael has just licked a streak of warmth up his wounded arm.
#12 - Wait
His friend’s breathless voice on the other end of the line pleaded with him not to go just yet, and hearing that out-of-place tone coming from Hamato Raphael … he wished he could oblige.
#13 - Change
Raph cursed when the line went dead and pointedly told Leo he was taking point position, although they both knew he was just planning on diving straight into the firefight alone.
#14 - Command
He figured it must be nice to be a ninja, then he wouldn’t have been forced to follow some fat Captain’s blind order to swarm in … and gotten shot to shit in the first five minutes.
#15 - Hold
The retreat command hadn’t been given, but who was really going to argue when the shadows themselves seemed to take hold of him and whisk him out of the crossfire?
#16 - Need
He wanted to yell and scream at Whitmire for getting himself shot up, but he found that all he could do was shake uncontrollably and clench his fists while Donny looked over the man.
#17 - Vision
Shadows and lights were dancing in his sight and behind his eyes … but he didn’t need to see to feel the hovering mass of barely contained nerves and worry just inches away.
#18 - Attention
One could not really expect to wake up from pain-filled delirium surrounded by four giant turtles and a monster rat and have a GOOD reaction … never the less, he apologized to Mike for the bloody nose.
#19 - Soul
Raph had laughed hysterically until his baby brother had muttered through bloody rags that he and Whitmire were freakin’ soul-mates … then he’d gone suspiciously quiet.
#20 - Picture
There’d been a news article recently about a bust led by Miller and Whitmire, with a large picture of the pair that Raph had snuck into his room and tucked beneath his pillow.
#21 - Fool
When Whitmire got drunk he cackled and howled and cursed and danced about, and once planted a sloppy kiss on Raph’s cheek … but was oblivious to the resulting blush across green skin.
#22 - Mad
There was a fistfight once, both of them screaming and shoving and taking swings, swearing they’d never hang out with each other again … the next night Whitmire showed up with some beer and helped Raph work on his bike.
#23 - Child
Raph wouldn’t let Paul meet Casey Jones … he used the baby as the excuse, saying that Case was too busy, but really … he wonders if he just doesn’t want to share Whitmire … and that’s a scary thought.
#24 - Now
He remembers the days of hitting the town with Casey fondly, but there’s something different here … something heavier and thicker bubbling right beneath the surface.
#25 - Shadow
His friend talks about baby Shadow all the time, but whenever Whitmire mentions maybe meeting her … Raph goes quiet … and the oddest look washes over his features.
#26 - Goodbye
Whitmire gets sent to California once, and Raph is just so sure he won’t be coming back that he rants and curses and destroys his room in a fit of unjustifiable anger.
#27 - Hide
After his outburst, Leo pulls him aside and tells him he should really just be honest with himself, and with Whitmire, about what he’s feeling … so Raph punches him.
#28 - Fortune
There was a fortune cookie that prophesized Whitmire’s one true love being closer than he knew, and he’d laughed uproariously until Raph had pegged him on the head with a packet of soy sauce and stormed out the door … that’s when Paul got his first clue.
#29 - Safe
He huddled in the corner of Whitmire’s cramped apartment and studied the piles of dishes, leftover Chinese takeout boxes and dirty laundry … and wondered why he liked it here so much.
#30 - Ghost
Raph crashed one night on the musty couch, but didn’t get any sleep, the desperate, painful cries for people he didn’t know haunted him more than Whitmire’s dreams.
#31 - Book
Don handed Raph a book at breakfast that damn near made him choke on his cereal, then non-chalantly told him he should go over the positions with Whitmire before trying any of them.
#32 - Eye
TV shows and movies always make such a big deal about seeing the soul through a person’s eyes, and he never bought it, but Whitmire has a giant fleck of gold in one of his hazel eyes that fascinates Raphael to no end … he thinks maybe he can see his own soul in it’s color.
#33 - Never
He’s made himself swear that he’ll never let Raphael down, the mutant had been through enough in his life, and Paul was determined to be one of the humans he could always count on.
#34 - Sing
Whitmire sings in the shower, really bad eighties music that makes Raph just laugh until tears stream down his face … but he never harasses him about it.
#35 - Sudden
When Miller and Leo have a sudden falling out … Raph watches Whitmire carefully, to see if this was all just a joke to him … but he buys Raph a beer and tells him he’s sure the boring, old married couple will be back together soon.
#36 - Stop
Raph mentioned once that he should really quit smoking before it killed him, and Paul replied that he’d be sure to suggest that to the bullets and deadly instruments flying towards his face on a daily basis.
#37 - Time
It took 45 days to trust him, 68 more to bring him to the lair, 82 extra to realize he was an important part of his life, only 1 day to fall in love with him and 165 after to do anything about it.
#38 - Wash
He … he wanted to wash the dishes in the sink … and clean up the trash … and maybe … make the bed … prove that he could look after someone other than himself … and shit … what the fuck was wrong with him?
#39 - Torn
He chomped and chewed and tore at his nails with his teeth whenever he was nervous or bored … Raph had taken to smacking his hand away from his teeth and flicking his nose with his big sausage fingers … it pissed him off.
#40 - History
Paul didn’t talk about the reasons he’d moved from Chicago to New York, but Raph knew that whatever it had been … it was that which had turned his friend into a cold, sarcastic and cynical man.
#41 - Power
The turtle’s strength always managed to surprise him … he’d forget about it until he was in a bind and Raph would smoothly yank him to safety with no effort at all.
#42 - Bother
He’d stretched out as long and lean as he could go, baking in the summer heat that beat down on the roof of his building, there was a heady sensation in the air … but he couldn’t be bothered to turn and meet the eyes he knew were observing him.
#43 - God
He told Raph once that he didn’t believe in god, and the turtle’s eyes had flicked up and down Whitmire’s body, and admitted that he didn’t really either.
#44 - Wall
Really, he should have known that asking Raphael to face the wall while he peeled off his sewer drenched clothes would never work.
#45 - Naked
‘What’s the big deal, I’m always naked’-he’d said as he’d pegged Whitmire’s face with one of the few ‘guest towels’ in the lair.
#46 - Drive
Whitmire had an old Camero that was barely held together by spit and string, but they would still take off some weekends and drive as far as they could get away with … just to see what they would find.
#47 - Harm
The first time Raph had come to him beaten and bloody, the overwhelming rage had startled him and made him realize he’d taken this ‘man’ on as his responsibility.
#48 - Precious
It was a precarious thing, like a statue made of fine powder … and he was so in awe of it, in awe of the man himself, that he worried his merest touch would find it all crumbling to the ground.
#49 - Hunger
The constant biting and nibbling at his neck were really scaring the hell out of him … but he just couldn’t work up the cruelty to force the contact-deprived turtle to stop.
#50 - Believe
He wasn’t sure something this strange could work out in the end, but he’d been lonely too long and Raphael needed something that was his …and his alone … and Paul figured, what the hell … he could be that for him.
The End
>_> ... I uh ... didn't actually JOIN the 1sentece comm to do this ... cuz I figured they'd probably be all "WHO TEH FCUK is Paul Whitmire??? O_o??" I hope I do not offend or upset anyone by this... heh... *hugs*?
Fandom: TMNT-FRAGMENT'verse
Rating: R - words and situations
Genre: 1 sentence set
Summary: 50 sentences dealing with the many levels of Raph and Paul .... if you don't know who I mean by Paul yet ... look into the fragment universe ... here
#01 - Motion
It was ridiculous, really, how a creature that seemed so heavy and bulky could float through silent movements like water in a stream.
#02 - Cool
Raph laughingly told him that turtles didn’t sweat, then placed a cool hand against the detective’s over-heated skin, and the vulgar retort hung up somewhere in his throat.
#03 - Young
Whitmire was often reminded how young the mutants actually were each time he called Raphael a punk, and it was promptly suggested that he ‘suck shit through a tube’.
#04 - Last
Often he would sit alone and watch the two turtles slink away into the night, then Miller would call his goodbye and turn the corner … and Paul Whitmire would wonder just what the fuck he was doing.
#05 - Wrong
He supposed most people would have freaked out and screamed for the FBI, and he might still … because surely it wasn’t right to feel so comfortable around a five foot tall talking turtle armed with pointy objects.
#06 - Gentle
Three bulky fingers on each hand instead of five, yet they moved with the utmost care pulling the bandage tight around his shin.
#07 - One
Whitmire had told him once that he was the only person left in his family, so he should shut the fuck up about his brothers and enjoy them while they were still here.
#08 - Thousand
Raph asked Paul for a grand once, to get a new bike, and Whitmire had smiled brightly and told him to ‘suck shit through a tube’.
#09 - King
When Raph learned Whitmire had a phobia of rats, he took great pleasure in meticulously recounting each encounter with the rat king … just to make the steadfast cop shiver a little.
#10 - Learn
“I don’t see why I gotta be the one to teach you this shit, Raph … and I swear to God if you do the ‘help me Obi-Wan Kenobi’ thing ONE more time, I will bitch-slap you into next week … now turn over.”
#11 - Blur
It was a lightening quick motion, and there’s a chance that he was delusional from blood loss … but he’s pretty sure that Raphael has just licked a streak of warmth up his wounded arm.
#12 - Wait
His friend’s breathless voice on the other end of the line pleaded with him not to go just yet, and hearing that out-of-place tone coming from Hamato Raphael … he wished he could oblige.
#13 - Change
Raph cursed when the line went dead and pointedly told Leo he was taking point position, although they both knew he was just planning on diving straight into the firefight alone.
#14 - Command
He figured it must be nice to be a ninja, then he wouldn’t have been forced to follow some fat Captain’s blind order to swarm in … and gotten shot to shit in the first five minutes.
#15 - Hold
The retreat command hadn’t been given, but who was really going to argue when the shadows themselves seemed to take hold of him and whisk him out of the crossfire?
#16 - Need
He wanted to yell and scream at Whitmire for getting himself shot up, but he found that all he could do was shake uncontrollably and clench his fists while Donny looked over the man.
#17 - Vision
Shadows and lights were dancing in his sight and behind his eyes … but he didn’t need to see to feel the hovering mass of barely contained nerves and worry just inches away.
#18 - Attention
One could not really expect to wake up from pain-filled delirium surrounded by four giant turtles and a monster rat and have a GOOD reaction … never the less, he apologized to Mike for the bloody nose.
#19 - Soul
Raph had laughed hysterically until his baby brother had muttered through bloody rags that he and Whitmire were freakin’ soul-mates … then he’d gone suspiciously quiet.
#20 - Picture
There’d been a news article recently about a bust led by Miller and Whitmire, with a large picture of the pair that Raph had snuck into his room and tucked beneath his pillow.
#21 - Fool
When Whitmire got drunk he cackled and howled and cursed and danced about, and once planted a sloppy kiss on Raph’s cheek … but was oblivious to the resulting blush across green skin.
#22 - Mad
There was a fistfight once, both of them screaming and shoving and taking swings, swearing they’d never hang out with each other again … the next night Whitmire showed up with some beer and helped Raph work on his bike.
#23 - Child
Raph wouldn’t let Paul meet Casey Jones … he used the baby as the excuse, saying that Case was too busy, but really … he wonders if he just doesn’t want to share Whitmire … and that’s a scary thought.
#24 - Now
He remembers the days of hitting the town with Casey fondly, but there’s something different here … something heavier and thicker bubbling right beneath the surface.
#25 - Shadow
His friend talks about baby Shadow all the time, but whenever Whitmire mentions maybe meeting her … Raph goes quiet … and the oddest look washes over his features.
#26 - Goodbye
Whitmire gets sent to California once, and Raph is just so sure he won’t be coming back that he rants and curses and destroys his room in a fit of unjustifiable anger.
#27 - Hide
After his outburst, Leo pulls him aside and tells him he should really just be honest with himself, and with Whitmire, about what he’s feeling … so Raph punches him.
#28 - Fortune
There was a fortune cookie that prophesized Whitmire’s one true love being closer than he knew, and he’d laughed uproariously until Raph had pegged him on the head with a packet of soy sauce and stormed out the door … that’s when Paul got his first clue.
#29 - Safe
He huddled in the corner of Whitmire’s cramped apartment and studied the piles of dishes, leftover Chinese takeout boxes and dirty laundry … and wondered why he liked it here so much.
#30 - Ghost
Raph crashed one night on the musty couch, but didn’t get any sleep, the desperate, painful cries for people he didn’t know haunted him more than Whitmire’s dreams.
#31 - Book
Don handed Raph a book at breakfast that damn near made him choke on his cereal, then non-chalantly told him he should go over the positions with Whitmire before trying any of them.
#32 - Eye
TV shows and movies always make such a big deal about seeing the soul through a person’s eyes, and he never bought it, but Whitmire has a giant fleck of gold in one of his hazel eyes that fascinates Raphael to no end … he thinks maybe he can see his own soul in it’s color.
#33 - Never
He’s made himself swear that he’ll never let Raphael down, the mutant had been through enough in his life, and Paul was determined to be one of the humans he could always count on.
#34 - Sing
Whitmire sings in the shower, really bad eighties music that makes Raph just laugh until tears stream down his face … but he never harasses him about it.
#35 - Sudden
When Miller and Leo have a sudden falling out … Raph watches Whitmire carefully, to see if this was all just a joke to him … but he buys Raph a beer and tells him he’s sure the boring, old married couple will be back together soon.
#36 - Stop
Raph mentioned once that he should really quit smoking before it killed him, and Paul replied that he’d be sure to suggest that to the bullets and deadly instruments flying towards his face on a daily basis.
#37 - Time
It took 45 days to trust him, 68 more to bring him to the lair, 82 extra to realize he was an important part of his life, only 1 day to fall in love with him and 165 after to do anything about it.
#38 - Wash
He … he wanted to wash the dishes in the sink … and clean up the trash … and maybe … make the bed … prove that he could look after someone other than himself … and shit … what the fuck was wrong with him?
#39 - Torn
He chomped and chewed and tore at his nails with his teeth whenever he was nervous or bored … Raph had taken to smacking his hand away from his teeth and flicking his nose with his big sausage fingers … it pissed him off.
#40 - History
Paul didn’t talk about the reasons he’d moved from Chicago to New York, but Raph knew that whatever it had been … it was that which had turned his friend into a cold, sarcastic and cynical man.
#41 - Power
The turtle’s strength always managed to surprise him … he’d forget about it until he was in a bind and Raph would smoothly yank him to safety with no effort at all.
#42 - Bother
He’d stretched out as long and lean as he could go, baking in the summer heat that beat down on the roof of his building, there was a heady sensation in the air … but he couldn’t be bothered to turn and meet the eyes he knew were observing him.
#43 - God
He told Raph once that he didn’t believe in god, and the turtle’s eyes had flicked up and down Whitmire’s body, and admitted that he didn’t really either.
#44 - Wall
Really, he should have known that asking Raphael to face the wall while he peeled off his sewer drenched clothes would never work.
#45 - Naked
‘What’s the big deal, I’m always naked’-he’d said as he’d pegged Whitmire’s face with one of the few ‘guest towels’ in the lair.
#46 - Drive
Whitmire had an old Camero that was barely held together by spit and string, but they would still take off some weekends and drive as far as they could get away with … just to see what they would find.
#47 - Harm
The first time Raph had come to him beaten and bloody, the overwhelming rage had startled him and made him realize he’d taken this ‘man’ on as his responsibility.
#48 - Precious
It was a precarious thing, like a statue made of fine powder … and he was so in awe of it, in awe of the man himself, that he worried his merest touch would find it all crumbling to the ground.
#49 - Hunger
The constant biting and nibbling at his neck were really scaring the hell out of him … but he just couldn’t work up the cruelty to force the contact-deprived turtle to stop.
#50 - Believe
He wasn’t sure something this strange could work out in the end, but he’d been lonely too long and Raphael needed something that was his …and his alone … and Paul figured, what the hell … he could be that for him.
The End
>_> ... I uh ... didn't actually JOIN the 1sentece comm to do this ... cuz I figured they'd probably be all "WHO TEH FCUK is Paul Whitmire??? O_o??" I hope I do not offend or upset anyone by this... heh... *hugs*?