It has been a busy week and it's only Wednesday. My grandma (one
that is actually close to me) is sick in the hospital and probably wont
be able to leave for a while. For the past 4 days I was the only one
who would come to visit her. And since my grandma is basically living
off of wellfare, I had to spend a lot of my own money on her. I don't
really mind that, I just really wanted to get my hair done instead.
For the last two nights I've been sleeping in my house alone. Something
like that has never really happened before. My parents never leave. My
mom had disappeared with a crackhead that puts window tint on his
screen door . She's home now, things are fine I guess. And while all of
this has been taking place I think I have managed to piss Hal off for
some reason, and never return anyone's calls. I'm a bad friend.
This whole experience has made me feel so alone. I wish I could find
some one that could make that feeling go away, but I haven't met that
person yet. I can hang out with as many friends as I want, but none of
them could ever hold me or touch me in a way that would make me feel
safe and that I have some one.
And on top of it all I feel so betrayed. Not by friends, but by family. I think that's fucked up.
There's good news but it's also boring news. Aside from my little
crisis my summer has been sweet as hell. Thanks to the peeps that be
makin' it tight.
p.s I'm sorry, but I'm neglectful.