Draco/Hermione- Foolish- Chapter 12
Title: Foolish
Author: blacksouledbutterfly (me)
Rating: Mature
Pairings: Draco/Hermione
Summary: I always knew you would be the one to make me cry....
12- Draco
For the first time I can remember I wanted to strangle my mother.
She was sitting in one of the common rooms of the house with Pansy’s mother talking about wedding arrangements.
I was only glad that Pansy wasn’t there as well, but was instead out shopping with some of her friends, because I don’t think I could have taken her annoying voice carrying on and on with my mother and hers about a wedding I didn’t even want to have.
Sometimes I wonder why I even agreed to this stupid arrangement. It makes no sense now that I would agree to marry someone I despise and push away the one person I loved to the point where it would make her want to get away from me for the rest of my life and I wonder how I could be so stupid.
I guess everyone makes the mistake of pushing the one they love away in some way.
After all they say you always hurt the one that you love, and I did just that.
And I really hate that fact that I hurt you. It feels like a part of me has died or a part of me has been torn out and slammed down on the floor and stomped on. And it kills me because every tear that you cried made me feel like I caused them even when I might not have.
I was so guilty. I blamed myself for all of your pain and now, I have a daughter out there who I just found out about and may never see again.
I feel like a part of me has died.
I watched the house elves run back and forth in and out of the room bringing things to my mother and Pansy’s mother and I remembered your crusade to free the house elves from their slavery.
Maybe I wanted to make them free too at some point for you but I didn’t because I was used to them and I was raised with them and to me it would be like going to another planet to let them go.
Still I can imagine your eyes on fire as you talked about giving them equal rights and I remember Weasley’s face crinkling every time you yelled at him about that.
Pansy’s mother seemed very excited about the planning of the wedding. Her face was lit up like the Christmas trees at Hogwarts.
I wanted her to shut up.
But she didn’t.
Instead she kept babbling on and on about how excited she was that her daughter was going to be marrying me, a pure blood she thought would make her daughter happy and keep her in fine things with the money my family had.
I remember when we were in school and I told you that my mother wanted me to marry Pansy.
You had your head pressed against the crook of my neck and you sighed heavily. “I guess that seems logical. She is a pureblood, like you, not a muggle born like me.”
And I sighed and told you that I didn’t love Pansy and I didn’t want to marry her.
I told you that I would rather die a thousand deaths.
But now, here I was, sitting on the chair across from my mother and Pansy’s mother and listening to them talk about our wedding.
And I hate myself for it.
Author: blacksouledbutterfly (me)
Rating: Mature
Pairings: Draco/Hermione
Summary: I always knew you would be the one to make me cry....
12- Draco
For the first time I can remember I wanted to strangle my mother.
She was sitting in one of the common rooms of the house with Pansy’s mother talking about wedding arrangements.
I was only glad that Pansy wasn’t there as well, but was instead out shopping with some of her friends, because I don’t think I could have taken her annoying voice carrying on and on with my mother and hers about a wedding I didn’t even want to have.
Sometimes I wonder why I even agreed to this stupid arrangement. It makes no sense now that I would agree to marry someone I despise and push away the one person I loved to the point where it would make her want to get away from me for the rest of my life and I wonder how I could be so stupid.
I guess everyone makes the mistake of pushing the one they love away in some way.
After all they say you always hurt the one that you love, and I did just that.
And I really hate that fact that I hurt you. It feels like a part of me has died or a part of me has been torn out and slammed down on the floor and stomped on. And it kills me because every tear that you cried made me feel like I caused them even when I might not have.
I was so guilty. I blamed myself for all of your pain and now, I have a daughter out there who I just found out about and may never see again.
I feel like a part of me has died.
I watched the house elves run back and forth in and out of the room bringing things to my mother and Pansy’s mother and I remembered your crusade to free the house elves from their slavery.
Maybe I wanted to make them free too at some point for you but I didn’t because I was used to them and I was raised with them and to me it would be like going to another planet to let them go.
Still I can imagine your eyes on fire as you talked about giving them equal rights and I remember Weasley’s face crinkling every time you yelled at him about that.
Pansy’s mother seemed very excited about the planning of the wedding. Her face was lit up like the Christmas trees at Hogwarts.
I wanted her to shut up.
But she didn’t.
Instead she kept babbling on and on about how excited she was that her daughter was going to be marrying me, a pure blood she thought would make her daughter happy and keep her in fine things with the money my family had.
I remember when we were in school and I told you that my mother wanted me to marry Pansy.
You had your head pressed against the crook of my neck and you sighed heavily. “I guess that seems logical. She is a pureblood, like you, not a muggle born like me.”
And I sighed and told you that I didn’t love Pansy and I didn’t want to marry her.
I told you that I would rather die a thousand deaths.
But now, here I was, sitting on the chair across from my mother and Pansy’s mother and listening to them talk about our wedding.
And I hate myself for it.