I found out Wednesday it's for sure arthritis in my foot...one of my joints ive never had a problem with...it will probably be my shoulder and elbows next....then ill have nothing left for it to fuck up...I'm real depressed...like haven't been myself depressed...so everyone keep me moving keep me happy....get me out of the house...

So both of my best friends got really confused when they found out ben and i haven't said I love you...both of them were pretty much like "but you do right? he does right? cause you can tell you both are...that's crazy i just figured you guys had said it already"...haha damn I wish my best friends weren't the ones seen the least out of most of my ( Read more... )

I couldn't sleep last night...I work 8 hours today...ben is picking me up at about 530 six oclock to go to columbus...I don't know how I'm gonna handle today at all....I've never gone without any sleep...

Andrew comes back from England....and yes we are good friends out of nowhere again....big fucking deal...all of a sudden tho everyone seems to think we are having some affair behind ben's back...my mother and his mother now and ben gave me a dirty look when i told him who i was talking to online the other night....note to you all: I'm not a fucking ( Read more... )

The polish festival is tomorrow....I think I have to make two trips this weekend tho....I have a friend named Laura that I love dearly but she causes way too much drama....so I'm gonna take another trip with her Sunday probably....everyone else needs to get ahold of me to go tomorrow afternoon sometime...I'm gonna be a total pig tomorrow so anyone ( Read more... )

Some fuck destroys my life two years ago and now I can't trust the most wonderful guy I've ever met in my life...I feel horrible that Ben has to deal with me having these anxiety attacks all the time over silly things....me practically drowning myself in my arthritis medicine and wine if there is the slightest fear of me becoming pregnant...I mean ( Read more... )