They Might Be K-ON! Chapter 8
Harry C.K. Dexter Haven Seven
Track Eight
Hey Mister DJ, I Thought You Said We Had a Deal
"Bill, it's been too long."
John spread wood glue across the back of the gigantic cardboard head, then laid several strips of wood down on top of it, ensuring stability in the humid Californian air. "Remind me why is our band mascot William Allen White?" asked John. After thirty years of seeing the Kansas journalist's smiling face, he had started to wonder what had possessed them to use it in the first place.
"Because we are crazy guys who drink coffee." replied John.
"You mean old crazy old men who drink coffee." John chuckled.
"And remind me why we're the ones doing this, and not the people at the Fillmore?"
"Because the people at the Fillmore think they're creepy."
John got up from the hotel bed. "I'm going to make some coffee." he said. John nodded absently, assembling another head. John put on some water. Despite being tiny, this hotel had a better selection of coffee than the Hilton in Texas. He then turned to join his friend when something caught his eye. It was John's backpack. Remembering how Sawako had given him a good talking to, he went over to it and began rummaging around through John's mysterious collection of odds and ends.
"John, why are you looking in my backpack?" said John, looking up.
"Because of this." He held up a CD case. He was also holding a purple sock, which he dropped on the table next to him. "Since Sawa was really unhappy with us for not listening to this yet, I was thinking that maybe we should..."
"I don't know, John," said John. "We need to have all this stuff ready by tomorrow if we want to use it."
"I know, but I feel bad, not hearing this. I mean, those girls have gone out of their way to learn about us, yet we don't know a thing about them. And considering all the trouble we went to to get them, it seems like an awful waste."
"John, tour." said John, gesturing to the giant heads.
"John, songs." said John, gesturing to the CD in his hand.
"Songs." said John, putting down the head. John dug through his bags and found a small CD player. He inserted the disk into it and pressed play.
"Curry Nochi Rice!" shouted a high pitched voice they recognised as Yui the guitarist.
"One! Two! One! Two! Three! Four!" They heard Ritsu the drummer count in. The song was loud and fast. A common but powerful riff held the song together and was complimented with Yui's surprisingly energetic vocals. The whole thing was tied in with a strong chorus with impressive harmonising. Unpolished, maybe? Amateurish, possibly? Fun? Catchy? Promising? Yes. It most certainly was.
"Wow," said John, pressing pause as the song ended. "That was... really good."
"I think it was called Curry Nochi Rice," said John. "And you're right. That was good. The next one is called," He struggled to pronounce it properly. "Ca - ga - ya - ke GIRLS! Shall we give it a listen?"
John had been right when he said the second song was good and fast... and stuff. It was very fast. He was impressed with how many syllables they were able to fit into just a few seconds. A couple English words stood out to him, such as "Never ending girl's life," "study," "after school" and "jumping now!" But none of them seemed out of place.
"I never thought they'd suck," said John. "But I really wasn't expecting it to sound this good."
"Well, there are a lot more songs," said John. "Why delay?"
For the rest of the night, they listened to the CD. It turned out that Yui wasn't the only one who sang. The third and fourth songs were sung by Mio, who had a more mature voice than Yui. The two switched every couple of songs. When one was singing lead, the other would take backup. But despite being the two lead singers, the others sang in a couple songs that seemed to be written by them as well. Mugi sang what seemed to be a love song about her keyboard called Dear My Keys. The song reminded John pleasantly of ABBA. Azusa sang one called Watashi wa Watashi no Michi wo Iku (John translated the title to mean I Go My Own Road.) which had an nineties feel to it. Ritsu's was called Mokujise Happy 100%, a techno pop song with complex synthesisers..
The CD ended with a fast punk song sung by Mio called Don't Say "Lazy". Besides breaking an unwritten rule of music and rhyming "lazy" with "crazy", it was one of the best songs John and John had heard in a while.
"Not like we had much choice anyway," said John. "But do you think we're in good company?"
John took the CD out of the player and placed it gently into the case. He noticed the artwork on it for the first time. He had seen it when he first received it, but was so wrapped up in making calls and arrangements that he hadn't even given it a second glance. Now he saw that the dominant colours were pink, white and gold. On it was a purple star with a gold outline, the letters HTT for Ho-kago Tea Time were written across it. The background was covered in sparkles, proving beyond the shadow of a doubt that this album was put together by Japanese schoolgirls.
"Yes," said John, smiling. "I think we're in very good company."
~~~
"Mugi-chan, do American burgers taste different from the ones in Japan?" Yui said. She had eaten three of them.
"You've eaten many, shouldn't you know?" asked Ritsu, sipping an orange soda. "Oh wait. You ate so fast that you couldn't taste it, right?"
"Mm hmm..." said Yui, chewing her fourth.
"Yui-senpai, you're going to hurt so much tomorrow." said Azusa, shaking her head.
"Enjoying your burgers?" Marty had gotten up from his table with the other TMBG members and come to see how the girls were doing. Yui and Azusa jumped to attention.
"SIR!" they shouted in their most militaristic voices, saluting. Mio groaned.
"Yes, Mr. Beller," said Mio. "Thank you very much."
"That's good," he said, holding back laughter. "You're going to need your strength for tomorrow. You've done soundchecks before, right?"
Mio remembered the show they had done on New Year's Eve the previous year. They did a rather disorganised soundcheck then. Yui ended up bleeding.
"Yes." she said, nervously.
"We'll be doing one tomorrow," said the drummer.
"Really?" said Mio, even more nervously.
"Uh huh," said Marty. "You'll be able to see the Fillmore!"
"The Fillmore, what's that?" said Ritsu.
"Seriously, Sawa didn't tell you?" said Dan, looking up from his meal. Sawako looked sheepish.
"Well, I was kind of excited about other things, so..."
"Sensei!"
"Calm down," Sawako took a deep breath. "The Fillmore is the first club you'll be playing at. It'll be on friday."
"That's five days from now!" shrieked Azusa, nearly knocking over her soda. "We don't know what we're going to play!"
"What did you expect?" said Sawako. "You came here to do shows, you had to start sometime."
"I thought we might have two weeks at least." Azusa sulked. Ritsu, Yui and Mugi seemed thrilled, however.
"Stop worrying, already!" said Ritsu, slapping Mio on the back. "We know all of our songs by heart!"
"Actually," said Mugi. "I was wondering if we could do a cover?"
The others looked at Sawako. Sawako looked at Marty, Dan and Danny.
"Sure," said Dan. "You'll to let us know the artist, so we can get our lawyers on it. It shouldn't be a problem though. What song did you have in mind?"
~~~
"Wow, Mugi. You've got really interesting taste."
It was backstage at the Fillmore. The green room to be exact. Mugi had plugged her iPod into a pair of speakers and played them the most bombastic song they had ever heard. According to Azusa, "It sounds like a circus band on crack!" She had played them the song, Le Pop, by the Norwegian band, Katzenjammer. Like them, all the members of Katzenjammer were women. They sang in English, albeit with strong Norwegian accents (which sounded Scottish), and wrote songs which seemed to be about anything from Revolutions, to lost love, to deals with the Devil, to demon cats. And stuff.
Ritsu was drumming her fingers on a table. She seemed to like the song enough.
"So, will you play it?" asked Mugi, beaming as always.
"Well, sure, I'll play it," said Ritsu. "I'm just not sure if they will."
"Were lyrics real saying-?" Mio began.
"I thought it was awesome!" said Yui. "The best part is, we can all sing it together!"
They Might Be Giants were rehearsing on the stage, making sure that everything would sound good when they performed. So far, they had played five and a a half songs. Halfway through the sixth, the sound system failed completely.
"Whistling in the dark! Whist-" BOOM!
The whole thing was rather funny. John looked flustered, singing his heart out from behind his keyboard on minute, then the next, he could barely be heard from ten feet away. Stage acoustics were so weird.
"Alright, John," said a technician. "We'll see what went wrong."
"Damn! Last chorus and everything." said John. He went over to John, standing with his guitar by a mic stand. The two of them looked over the setlist.
"So, why didn't we play this one first?" said John pointing to a song he didn't recognise. Then he realised that he didn't recognise it. "Hold up, what is that song anyway?"
"Just an idea, John," said John. "You remember the conditions the Millionaire set up, right?"
"Yeah," said John. "We need to sing songs from the same country as our opening band. Oh no... Is this a Japanese song?"
"Mm hmm," John nodded.
"But the title is..."
"The title is Young Now. Does that really sound like an English song title to you?"
John chuckled. He definitely had a point.
"What are the lyrics? Are they in Japanese?" asked John.
"There are two words in it," said John. "There's the first word, Young, and the second word, Now. And it goes like this: Young Now! Young Now!"
"So, it's pretty simple, huh?"
"Yep," said John strumming his guitar to demonstrate. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a round face looking at him from backstage. He still had trouble telling some of the girls apart, but with the short brown hair and yellow hair clip, he knew it was Yui. Yui jumped, and ran back to her friends. Mio was trying to figure out how to play the main riff of Le Pop on the bass, while Mugi easily played the deranged circus tune on her keyboard.
"He looked at me!" squealed Yui. "And his guitar is so cool!"
"Why is it all-of-a-sudden a big deal if Flansburgh-sensei looks at you?" said Azusa. "He has before, hasn't he?"
"It's different when he's holding guitar!" said Yui, as if her answer was perfectly reasonable.
"So, what's with you calling him 'Flansburgh-sensei' now?" said Ritsu. "He isn't a teacher."
"I kind of consider him to be one," Azusa said, playing a riff on her guitar. "I mean, he's more experienced than all of us, and I've learned a lot by listening to his music."
They heard a burst of feedback, then Mr. Linnell's voice saying, "Testing, testing, is this thing on?"
"Right, gentlemen, you're good to go." said the voice of the technician.
"One, two, one, two, three, four!"
"A woman came up to me and said
'I'd like to poison your mind
With wrong ideas that appeal to you
(Though I am not unkind)'
She looked at me
I looked at something
Written across her scalp
And these are the words that it faintly said
As I tried to call for help"
~~~
They Might Be Giants finished rehearsing at 5:00 in the afternoon. Ho-kago Tea Time went on next. The technician was very nice to them, helping them get plugged in to the right outlets. He was patient when they struggled with certain English words, and seemed to have a good gasp on what they were trying to say, regardless.
"This your first time here?" he said, probably joking.
"Yes," said Azusa. "This is also our first time in America."
"Tell you what," he said. "When you get popular in Japan, come back and do a show here. I know this guy, he can put together amazing light shows!"
The girls played through their set, and tried playing Le Pop together. Besides Mio refusing to sing some of the bolder parts of the song, and Yui getting completely lost at several points, Mugi kept a smile on her face and said, "Keep working at it. We can do this!"
"Oh, brother..." Mio groaned. They definitely were not ready for this.
"Oh, YEAH!" whooped Ritsu. They definitely were ready for this.
"So, what would this song be?" John walked on to the stage, holding a cup of coffee. "I don't recognise that from the CD."
"It's a cover," said Mugi, cheerfully as per usual. "It's called Le Pop, and it's by a Norwegian band. Dan said it wouldn't be an issue, legally."
"Oh, don't worry, it shouldn't," said John. "Are you going to play some of your own, too? Sorry, but I couldn't hear. The fellas can get pretty loud when they're excited."
"Uh huh," said Yui, shyly. "We are going to play many of originals, also."
"Right..." said John. He was still getting used to Yui's interesting way of speaking English.
"Um... Mr. Flansburgh?" said Azusa. "I was wondering if you wanted to... to watch us play a song?"
"Sure," said John. "I'd love to!"
"Tekunisan!" called Ritsu. "We're going to play one more song!"
"Right-o!" Tekunisan called back.
Mio was a little nervous at the prospect of John Flansburgh watching them play a song, but from the moment Ritsu counted in, she knew exactly which song to play. They kicked into Cagayake GIRLS! Yui sang her heart out, jumping around the stage with her guitar when she wasn't. Mio sang backup, trying not to look in Mr. Flansburgh's direction. Nearing the end, she accidentally caught his eye. He gave her a thumbs up. Mio blushed, and flubbed the last three bars.
"Nice," said John, clapping. "Very well done! What was that called?"
"Cagayake GIRLS!" said Mugi. "It was a collaboration between all of us, but that was before Azusa-chan joined."
"Well, keep it up," said John. "It looks like we made a good choice, getting you girls."
Tekunisan helped the girls unplug all of their instruments, and they went backstage. Ritsu got everyone cups and poured them expired ginger ale she found in the green room refrigerator. They all cringed, but it was better than nothing.
"Great job everyone!" she said. "Expect for those last three bars. What happened there, Mio-chan?"
"I looked at Mr. Flansburgh, and he gave me the thumbs up," she said. "And I kind of froze up." Mio looked embarrassed, and stared at her cup.
"Geez, you really are jumpy!" said Ritsu, who had come to expect this from her friend. "Well, just don't look at him when we play our songs, and you should be fine."
"I think it might be the song," said Mio. Mugi raised her large yellow eyebrows. "It's not that I don't like it. I do! And I want to play it. I just want to do one that's more to my style as well."
"There isn't anything wrong with that," said Mugi. "Would any of our songs do, or should we do another cover?"
"I don't know..." Mio said, "But I'll see what I can come up with."
~~~
Mio spent the next day listening to her iPod nonstop, almost never taking out her earbuds, except to rehearse the songs they had already agreed on. John introduced the other members of TMBG to the Young Now song. It didn't take long at all for them to figure out how to play it down to the exact note. Both John and John decided to sing it together.
"Well, fellas," said John, walking out of a telephone booth outside the hotel after a long day of practice. "It wasn't easy tracking them down, but I got permission for us to play the song."
John had told the others that the band who recorded the song, Oranges, were incredibly obscure. It had taken a lot of research to find who to talk to for the legal issues.
"What a relief!" sighed Marty. "I was worried that we wouldn't be able to do that one, and we'd need find a new song."
"The Millionaire plays a hard bargain," said Dan. "But we'll need to find one play next time, as well. If we keep doing short, easy songs like this, the Millionaire is going to notice. We need to put some more effort into this."
"I've been looking for songs every time we have internet," said John. "I've found a couple things which we might be able to do. I also realised something: The Millionaire never said we couldn't ask our opening band to help us, did he?"
The others looked at John like he was crazy.
"Um, John?" said John. "The Millionaire is deranged. Are you sure you want to risk making him mad?"
"Then he'd be deranged and mad," said Danny. "We don't want that!"
"I'm just saying," said John, raising his hands to signal that he wanted to them hear him out. "These girls have got talent. They're definitely better than us when we were their age. Remember Penguine?"
Everyone groaned, remembering one of the very first They Might Be Giants songs.
"It wasn't that bad." pouted John.
"That's not the point." said John. "The point is, we have some talented people who can help us."
"Would we need to tell them?" asked Dan. "About the Millionaire, I mean. Would they have to know?"
"What they don't know, won't hurt them," said John. "We've got this far, and they still don't suspect anything. We do the tour, we save Brooklyn, nothing goes wrong, and we sign the girls on to Idlewild. Sounds like a plan?"
Everyone thought for a moment.
"No." said everyone.
"Oh, come on!" John exclaimed in exasperation. "If any of you have ideas, why don't you say them?"
"Admittedly, the plan isn't that bad, aside from the nothing goes wrong part," said Danny. "Because last time we did something like this, everything that could go wrong, did, or at least nearly everything."
"And don't forget," added John. "The Millionaire said that he would cheat. Last time, he cheated by sending some of his minions after us. What do you bet it's only a matter of time before he sends Triangle Man or The Rake after us?"
"No, he wouldn't send Triangle Man," said John. "He can't use our own creations against us. But what the hell is The Rake?"
~~~
"Ugh! Why can't I find any songs?!" wailed Mio.
"Mio, calm down. You've done this three times." said Ritsu.
Mio still hadn't found a song she wanted to play. Though she insisted that she wanted to play Le Pop, she also continued to insist that if they were going to do this, they'd need to play one more song. She didn't want it to be an original.
"Maybe this isn't working." said Azusa.
"No! I need to do this on my own terms, otherwise I'll get stage fright if I so much as think of They Might Be Giants."
"Think of some other band, then," said Ritsu. "You listen to so many, it shouldn't be too hard."
"Yeah!" Azusa said, nodding. "There has to be some band you could think of."
"I've tried that when we practice," said Mio. "No matter who I think of, be it Talking Heads or The Smiths, They Might Be Giants is the band we're on tour with."
"I think I understand," Mugi chimed in cheerfully. "Mio-chan needs to feel like she's in control of the situation. I feel the same way, which is why I chose Le Pop. When I hear it, it just makes me want to kick something!"
Everyone looked at Mugi, who looked at the ceiling.
"I just don't understand why it's so hard finding the perfect song," said Ritsu. "You know, you'll need to come up with one soon. We only have a few days to learn it. And, John and John need to do all of that legal stuff."
Mio looked sheepishly at her iPod. "Well," she said. "There is one song I had in mind. I'm just not sure if it's very realistic to want to do this one."
Yui raised a chubby hand in the air, holding an unplugged microphone. "If Mio-chan wants to play a song, no matter what it is, we should play it! If it means she'll be happy again!"
"Are you sure?" said Mio. "it's kind of..."
"Just tell us," said Ritsu, trying to peek over Mio's shoulder to look at her iPod. "I'll drum anything, at this point."
~~~
Mio, Ritsu, Yui, Mugi, and Azusa ran down the hallways of the hotel as quickly as their legs would carry them. Janitors and other guests looked up in bewilderment at the five Japanese girls.
"FLAN-CHAN! RIN-CHAN!" squealed Yui and Mugi as they burst into the dining room, startling everyone inside..
John and John looked up from their coffee. They had never heard anyone use these names, yet it seemed obvious that the shouts were directed at them, and this was someone's idea of cute nicknames.
"So..." said John, warily. "What's going on?"
"Mio-chan found a song she wants to play." said Mugi, politely bowing.
"Oh, yeah," said John. "I heard you wanted to do that from the technician."
"Is it another Norwegian one?" asked John, hopefully.
"Not this one," said Mio. She was looking more and more embarrassed. "It's by a more famous band..."
"Oh." said John. He looked nervously at John, who looked at the girls.
"So..." said John, after a moment of awkward silence. "Who's it by?"
Mio looked nervously at John and John. This was why she was so reluctant to pick this song.
"It's by Simple Minds."