Redneck Jedi???
My wonderful friend Asjachyld felt that I, the Jedi of the concrete shoebox needed these:
Hope you enjoy them as much as I did, and I might be guilt of a few...guess I'll find out which ones everyone thinks they are.
You ever heard the phrase, "May the force be with y'all."
Your Jedi robe is a camouflage color.
You have ever used your light saber to open a bottle of Boone's Farm Strawberry Hill.
At least one wing of your X-Wings is primer colored.
You have bantha horns on the front of your land speeder.
You can easily describe the taste of an Ewok.
You have ever had an X-wing up on blocks in your yard.
You ever lost a hand during a light saber fight because you had to spit.
The worst part of spending time on Dagobah is the dadgum skeeters.
Wookies are offended by your B.O.
You have ever used the force to get yourself another beer so you didn't have to wait for a commercial.
You have ever used the force in conjunction with fishing/bowling.
Your father has ever said to you, "Shoot, son come on over to the dark side...it'll be a hoot."
You have ever had your R-2 unit use its self-defense electro-shock thingy to get the barbecue grill to light.
You have a confederate flag painted on the hood of your landspeeder.
Although you had to kill him, you kinda thought that Jabba the Hutt had a pretty good handle on how to treat his women.
You have ever accidentally referred to Darth Vader's evil empire as "them damn Yankees."
You have a cousin who bears a strong resemblance to Chewbacca.
You suggested that they outfit the Millennium Falcon with red wood deck. Y
You were the only person drinking Jack Daniels on the rocks during the cantina scene.
You ever fantasized about Princess Leah wearing Daisy Duke shorts.
You have the doors of your X-wing welded shut and you have to get in through the window.
If you hear . . . "Luke, I am your father... and your uncle..."
More than half the droids you own don't function.
The number of blasters you own exceeds your I. Q.
You wonder why Luke and Leia never got married.
Sandpeople back down from your mama.
You've used Jedi mind control to talk your way out of a DUI.
A Wookie has told you that you need to shave.
You've gone AT-AT tipping.
The Rancor monster refused to eat you.
In your opinion, that Cee-Threepio feller' "just ain't right."
The REAL reason you got into a fight in the cantina was because you ordered Bud Light...and they didn't have it.
You knew Princess Leia was your sister all along.
You say "these are not the beers you are looking for."
That "disturbance in the Force" was just last night's baked beans.
The Force isn't the only thing that runs in your family.
You call Hank Williams Jr. "master".
Your landspeeder has a gun rack.
You call Yoda your Li'l green buddy.
You think Stormtroopers are just Klan members with really good sheets.
You beat the Gammorean Guard in an "ugly" contest.
Your father's name is Garth Vader.
You have ever beaten up Han Solo for lookin' at your sister.
Your master ever said "My finger you will pull..hmmm?"
You didn't read the whole Jedi manual because there were no pictures.
Your best practical joke was sticking a banana in Boba Fett's tail pipe.
You feel that duct tape is like the force: it has a light side and a dark side and it holds the universe together.
You have ever gone deer huntin' with a lightsaber.
Your plan to destroy the Death Star included two M-80s and a half gallon of granny's moon shine.
Long Live the JEDI of the concrete shoebox....ya'll!