stupid things people say
So one of my friends from the prenatal group and I decided to go to a local baby and toddler morning. It was held at a church rec room (Play and Pray. har dee har, no there wasn't actually any religiousity evident) in a nearby village.
We hefted our babies + paraphernalia up the requisite steep stairs and were greeted by the Australian lady who evidently runs the group. She saw me first, so we had the baby introduction conversation-
her: "oh and who is this?"
me: "this is T!"
her: *insert some comment about him being cute, or sweet, or long, or whatever here. irrelevant to the story anyway*
Then she turns to my friend, E. E's baby has a feeding tube in her nose. Now, the reason for this is something called Prader-Willi Syndrome. It's a rare condition, and once the subject comes up it makes for an unnecessarily long exchange, and one which I can only imagine becomes tedious for E as no doubt people bring up the subject frequently. At the heart of the feeding tube matter, though, is the fact that she doesn't always eat properly, so that's the short form answer she tends to give people.
her: "ooooh. Who is this?"
E: "this is E, jr"
her, bluntly: "and why does she need..." *gestures to indicate the feeding tube*
E, patient as anything: "oh she needs that for feeding." (best answer evar, really. The feeding tube? It's for feeding. You've just met the person, why is it your business?)
her: *presses for more info*
E: *repeats pretty much the same answer, giving slightly more detail about the feeding*
her: "ah. We had a baby here last year who also needed a feeding tube. She died after a year, though.
both of us: .........................
I can't believe I didn't have a proper reaction at the time, but with all the screaming 2-3 yr olds running around us, it didn't even hit me what she really said until a few moments later.
Who the hell SAYS that sort of thing? To a mother with a baby who, for all you know, is in the same situation that other baby was in? gaaah.