America, huh? I've met Japan and Hungary so far. How exactly big are you countries anyway? It seems odd you'd be able to fit inside of a city, unless this city is much larger than I would have thought.
By any chance, Mr. The United Stats of America, do you have any milk? I need some for my coffee.
OKAY. AND THEN I WILL FOLLOW YOU INTO THE VAN LURED BY FALSE PROMISES OF CANDY AND WOOFBEASTS. BUT WILL I FIND MY FUZZY FRIENDS? NO. WHERE THERE SHOULD BE WOOFBEASTS, THERE IS ONLY HORROR AND FORCIBLY HARVESTED GENETIC MATERIAL. JUST MAKE SURE YOU CLEAN UP MY VIOLATED CORPSE BEFORE YOU FEED ME TO JAPAN. HE DOESN'T ENJOY THE TASTE OF OTHER PEOPLE FUCKING HIS ADOLESCENT HORDE TO DEATH.
[Video; close up of FBI Badge]callhimyorkJune 5 2011, 19:09:30 UTC
The fourth with an odd colored text, and the eighth to respond overall...
I think I recognize a pattern here, Zach.
FBI Special Agent Francis York Morgan. Please, just call me York. Everyone calls me that.
There's no need to be scared, really. I don't want to..."forcibly harvest your genetic material?" Right. In fact, I'm not even looking for a bucket anymore. Do you mind if I ask you a few questions?
[Video; close up of a grumpy troll kid]yourgoddamnitJune 5 2011, 22:13:42 UTC
WHO THE FUCK IS ZACH? ACTUALLY, NO. FUCK YOU. I REFUSE TO CALL YOU YORK. I WILL CALL YOU TOM BOMBADIL OF THE RHYMING RUMPUS FUCKASS FOREST. THEREFORE I WILL ONLY ANSWER YOUR QUESTIONS IF YOU DELIVER THEM IN WHIMSICAL RHYMING WHICH IS ACTUALLY JUST GRATING WORDVOMIT.
A puzzle, huh, Zach? It sounds like a reference to Lord of the Rings...
Here I am in the forest, where trodden leaves crunch. If you'd answer my question, I'd thank you a bunch. I don't know what you troll people have against pails. I simply want some milk before my mind's ship sails. I need it for mixing with my drink. It's actually simple, I like to think. Where can I find something to carry milk in? With something like that, this story would be at a fin.
Comments 160
Reply
Well, apparently, that's lewd.
Reply
I don't care what you use it for "officer". FBI- heh. Care to explain?
Reply
Reply
Reply
Are you one of the countries as well?
Reply
Yup! The greatest, in fact! I'm America! The one, the only, and the best!
Reply
By any chance, Mr. The United Stats of America, do you have any milk? I need some for my coffee.
Reply
AND THEN I WILL FOLLOW YOU INTO THE VAN
LURED BY FALSE PROMISES OF CANDY AND WOOFBEASTS.
BUT WILL I FIND MY FUZZY FRIENDS?
NO.
WHERE THERE SHOULD BE WOOFBEASTS, THERE IS ONLY HORROR
AND FORCIBLY HARVESTED GENETIC MATERIAL.
JUST MAKE SURE YOU CLEAN UP MY VIOLATED CORPSE BEFORE YOU FEED ME TO JAPAN.
HE DOESN'T ENJOY THE TASTE OF OTHER PEOPLE FUCKING HIS ADOLESCENT HORDE TO DEATH.
Reply
I think I recognize a pattern here, Zach.
FBI Special Agent Francis York Morgan. Please, just call me York. Everyone calls me that.
There's no need to be scared, really. I don't want to..."forcibly harvest your genetic material?" Right. In fact, I'm not even looking for a bucket anymore. Do you mind if I ask you a few questions?
Reply
ACTUALLY, NO.
FUCK YOU.
I REFUSE TO CALL YOU YORK.
I WILL CALL YOU TOM BOMBADIL OF THE RHYMING RUMPUS FUCKASS FOREST.
THEREFORE I WILL ONLY ANSWER YOUR QUESTIONS IF YOU DELIVER THEM IN WHIMSICAL RHYMING
WHICH IS ACTUALLY JUST GRATING WORDVOMIT.
Reply
Here I am in the forest, where trodden leaves crunch.
If you'd answer my question, I'd thank you a bunch.
I don't know what you troll people have against pails.
I simply want some milk before my mind's ship sails.
I need it for mixing with my drink.
It's actually simple, I like to think.
Where can I find something to carry milk in?
With something like that, this story would be at a fin.
Reply
[ he knows the trolls hate mops but not buckets. he's just hoping to build on the hilarity. ]
Reply
FBI Special Agent Francis York Morgan. Just call me York. Everyone calls me that.
Reply
Uh, alright. Not like I, y'know, care. Heh. [ Scritch scratch his cheek ]
Reply
You know, even in this Discedo place, the FBI has jurisdiction.
Reply
Leave a comment