TM #162 - I never thought I'd say this, but...
There are times when I'm ashamed to wear a Colonial uniform.
A few years ago, I was just like a hundred other Nuggets at the Fleet Academy on Picon. I was a kid, barely old enough to realize that I didn't know half of what I thought I did, and too interested in flying, partying and getting into trouble with buddies like Kara Thrace to care if I did. Okay, sure, I was disappointed to hear that I hadn't made the cut to fly a Viper, but that didn't dampen my spirits much, and it definitely didn't change the fact that the proudest day of my life then was the day they pinned those wings on me.
Lieutenant (Junior Grade) Karl C. Agathon, at your service. Loving life and loving the service and everything the Colonial Fleet and the Twelve Colonies themselves stood for.
Today's different. I'm a few years older, sure, and I've logged a hundred times more combat hours than most Colonial pilots had in twenty or thirty years. I've seen the very worst and the very best that we humans can do. I'm a husband. I'm a father.
And more than ever, I know that wearing this uniform and serving in the Fleet is the right thing to do. The human race needs everyone it can to see to its survival, its protection and its progression and development as a species. I'm proud to serve, still.
But...
I'm a man whose President has lied to him, used her power and influence to take the right to raise my own child and keep my own family away from me. And Hera wasn't just stolen. No, the President had to lie to Sharon and me, had to make us believe that our daughter was dead. Sharon was wrong to call her a murderer. It turns out that what she did was much, much worse.
I'm a man who has had to stand in a room where the leaders of the entire human race allowed themselves to believe that it wasn't just necessary, wasn't just acceptable, but right to condemn an entire species to extinction. Even the Admiral, who said himself that we as a race needed to be worthy of survival, wanted to wipe out every Cylon in existence.
I still respect him, and I respect the Major. They, at least, were willing to stand by their decisions and their actions for everyone to see, instead of hiding behind lies. It didn't make it any more right, but at least they had the courage of their convictions. I had to find the same courage to do what I did afterwards.
There are times when the blue tunic and gold insignia do nothing but remind me of just how far humanity and the honor of the Fleet can fall. But I tell myself they're also a symbol of how high they can reach, as well.
And my new proudest day-- well, second proudest, after Hera's birth-- was watching my wife get her own.
Capt. Karl "Helo" Agathon
Battlestar Galactica
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