The Perfect Weapon Chapter 10: Part 3 section 3 of 3
Chapter 10 Part 3 section 3 of 3
“Damn you!” she groaned and he moved his hand to her chain and just played with it, allowing her to recoup her mind from the dark well of desire down which it had begun to tumble again. “Well,” she took a deep breath, gathering her scattered thoughts, “They would not want you to leave. Even without this damn screw and skedaddle, you are too valuable to them….”
“Exactly, so we’ll see if my bluff works. And if not---“
“Bluff? Bluff! Your resignation was a bluff?!” She pinched him hard on the underside of his arm.
“Ouch!” he exclaimed. He began laughing, then stopped when she started speaking.
“You scared me. You…” she began to breathe heavily. Only he could render her emotions ungovernable. Sitting there in her cell, she knew that she would have never achieved anything if she had stayed with him he made her so…insane. She wondered if he had had trouble believing that she was a cold, calculating spy like he was when he learned the truth, given what an emotional…woman, person, she had been around him.
“Laura! Breathe normally or you’ll hyperventilate.” When she could not comply, he stopped her by attaching his mouth to hers in a kiss that simultaneously connected them and calmed her. “I’m sorry, honey, I forget sometimes that you can’t tell when I’m bluffing. Why are you so upset? So I love the job. I can walk away. But it would be okay even if I do resign. I was thinking…”
“Yes?” she asked, trying to think, trying to find a way out for them. For her. So she did not have to tell the truth and risk losing what she had. The game and him, everything all in one package.
“If I had to, maybe I could go back and get my degree in English and teach too? We could have that in common?” he asked hesitantly. For a moment, she closed her eyes and luxuriated in the notion that they were a normal couple and that career change was a viable option. But no, not if they were to stay together…
She opened her eyes, looking at him with all the love and need she felt. Cupping his face in her hands, trying to find the words to dissuade him, she kissed him gently. “That would be…great,” she began, “But a waste of your talents. You’re so gifted at analysis, the game, Jack. And you do love it. You’re not the desk type. It would be a shame to give it up.”
“Well, I’d give it up in a heartbeat for you, for us, for our future,” he said with no hesitation.
Wrapping her arms around him, she held on tight, struggling not to shriek in fear and grief. Using the lesson to calm herself that he had just taught her, she nuzzled his neck, kissed it, then kissed her way to his mouth. “Thank you,” she whispered and pulled his head to hers. “But I think we can find our way out of this.”
“Together.” He kissed her this time, she luxuriated in his body, his mouth against hers. He was so warm, when she had been feeling so cold.
“Yes, together. What, do you have that they need?” she asked when she pulled back.
They looked at each other and their eyes lit up at the same time. “Project Christmas research,” they said simultaneously. Their mouths met again. He murmured, “All that private research, here in the house, that you helped me encrypt…” That encryption that had sealed his apparent guilt years later.
“Because it was too dangerous,” she said triumphantly, as she licked his lower lip and then gently bit it. She was flooded with relief as the solution presented itself. Then a moment later, passion, the need to connect with him again, began to overwhelm her.
“If it fell into the wrong hands,” he concluded as his own hands began roving her body.
“And worse yet, it’s in my terrible handwriting and yours, which is even---“ her words were stopped by his mouth, his tongue delving into her warmth and wetness. She moaned and arched against him.
“Worse. Since I’m a lefty---“ he said as that hand began to pluck, gently, at her.
“I…happen to love that hand,” she gasped, trapping it between her legs as she clenched them together, stopping his movements. “I’m not ready yet, I want to touch you some more,” she said firmly. “Do you think that they would ever ascertain what the different slanting of your handwriting means? That to the left is the true solution?” she asked absently, running her hands up and down his arms, obsessing tonight over the muscles there, she knew. Another night, another set of muscles. She sighed. She pushed at him, hissed, “On your back for me.” He complied, raising one knee and turned slightly to face her. She knelt next to him, staring at him for a moment. God, he was gorgeous. And hers. All hers.
His mind reeled at the sight of her, so beautiful with the jewelry just emphasizing her nudity, with that look of love and passion on her face as she caressed his body. And she was his. All his. What had he done to deserve her? He hoped when he told her….He wanted to keep his mouth shut, just avoid it. But no, he had to tell the truth, he needed her to absolve him. He lifted a hand and began playing with the chain, slowly running his fingers down to her pelvis and then back up again.
“I have a confession, Laura,” he said, looking down.
“Go ahead,” she urged him, gently skimming her hands along his shoulders, his chest, his abdomen. Sighing with pleasure her hands drifted down to his thighs, massaging the muscles there. Smiling as his body responded, she said, “I think after tonight, after what we’ve done…that there’s nothing, no walls left between us. Is there?”
“I hope not. I hope….” He trailed off.
“What is it, Jack? You know I love you more than anything. What is it you said to me one time, that there’s nothing so scary whirling around your head that you cannot tell me? Isn’t that true for you, as well?” she asked gently, moving one hand up to caress his face with her fingertip, running it along his cheekbones, his nose, the curve of his mouth.
“I…that mission. For a while…I was tempted, I forgot…” Her other hand tightened on his leg, while his grasped her hips, then loosened as he carefully raised his gaze to hers.
Seeing the love there, the anxiety, her immediate response, her completely-unfounded fear that he had been tempted to be unfaithful, abated. “You were tempted…by the plan, the game? It was a good one and you wanted to be part of it?”
“How did you know?” he asked in astonishment. She thought happily, one more connection, I am like you. I could be tempted too by a great mission, a great game. But she could hardly say that and said instead, “Good guess. But what else? Tell me.”
“Amazing guess, Laura. You frighten me sometimes. But, but I forgot for a moment that I would have to break my promise, my vow to you.”
“But when you did realize it, you pulled back from it, didn’t you? And how long did it take? Three minutes? Five? “
“How did you know?” he asked in shock and relief, feeling the passion begin to return, clear and free this time. He wrapped his arms around her and took her mouth with his, feeling the need to connect again running through both of them. They sighed when their lips parted. He asked again, “How did you know?” and stroked her back with his hands. She curved one hand up into his hair and stroked his chest with the other.
“Because I know you, Jack.” He was so strong, amazingly strong. Where did he get the ability to resist? But why had he been tempted? She looked at him and said, “But this temptation before you…” She leaned forward and kissed his shoulder, ran her tongue along it to his collarbone, then licked the base of his throat.
“I feel, now, like it was a test of some kind…” he trailed off, she could tell, thinking, even as he sifted his hand through her hair, spreading it all around. Staring at the gold earrings glittering against the darkness of her hair, like, he thought suddenly, love shining through the darkness of temptation. It was all here, everything was right here, everything he needed to withstand any temptation. Love in one beautiful package, everything he ever needed and wanted right here in his arms.
“See, this is what I don’t understand, why I have trouble believing in God. I know you keep telling me I should read the Bible as a great piece of literature even if I don’t believe, but….I don’t understand how He could put temptation in your way like this? Destroy rather than create?” Her hand on his chest drifted downward over his hip, then slid around to grab his butt.
He laughed. “I don’t think God puts temptation in our way. The weakness is within us. It’s all there. But we have the free will to make the choice.”
“But why give us free will if we make stupid choices?” As they caressed each other, the discussion continued, the kind of discussion he had only ever been able to have with her. Grimacing then, he remembered the supervisor referring to his theory about good and evil being on a circle rather polar opposites on a line as being stupid; most people hated those conversations or thought them boring and pointless. Thank God for Laura, who enjoyed them as much as he did. She understood. She always did. Her knowledge, her acceptance, even tonight, especially tonight in all ways, it freed him once again. From his fears, his insecurities, his coldness…he did not feel like a lonely geek around her. Unconsciously, he frowned and shook his head.
Catching sight of his face, knowing his mind had leapt somewhere else, probably back to their immediate problem, she asked, “This last week? You’ve trying to evade the direct order -- the stress of that plus your own, ridiculous guilt?” she asked softly.
“You think it’s ridiculous, my guilt?” She nodded, rolled her eyes. His face relaxed instantly, then suffused with joy. “You understand? You’re not mad?” He grabbed her to him, so tightly she coughed. He let go, if only slightly, to roll her on top of him, to wrap his arms around her, while her hair fell all around them.
Bracing her forearms on either side of his head, she kissed him, delving deep into his mouth, trying to communicate with him in every way possible. “Jack, I think you’re more upset than I could ever be. That’s why my jealousy is so irrational. You are the most honorable man I have ever met. A good man. Perfect.. I can’t say it any plainer or simpler than that.”
“No one’s perfect, Laura!” he said as he gently bit her lower lip.
“What, you don’t think I’m perfect?” she asked in mock affront, biting his shoulder with enough of a sting to make him laugh.
“You’re perfect for me and that’s what counts,” he said firmly, pulling her head back down to him.
“I love you,” they said over and over, as they rolled and twisted around the bed, dislodging pillows, discarding one more layer, exposing more needs, more desire, more love. Losing control this time, not from the combination of fear and anger, but from the huge milestone they had reached together. The trust, the commitment, the understanding, the empathy, the love all combined as they grew dizzy again, kissing, touching, as that whirlwind began spinning.
Trying to gain some foothold in the vortex, she bit his arm. Too hard apparently, for he winced ever so slightly and asked, “Why do you bite so much, anyway? Why do you want me to bite you?”
“Sorry,” she murmured against the red mark on his arm.
He raised an eyebrow. “Sorry? You said sorry? This is a red letter day. But that’s okay, I’m tough, I can take your little teeth,” he laughed. “Honey. I’m waiting for an answer. And I….won’t open my legs again until you do.”
She laughed. “That threat doesn’t work as well coming from a man as a woman.”
“How about this one? I won’t bite you again until you give me some explanation of why you like it. Any explanation. I deserve something given the number of red marks on my body tonight.”
Startled she looked over at him, lying on his side in the moonlight. She bit her lip. Oh, she had gone overboard tonight in her fear and need, hadn’t she? She darted up out of the bed, needing to compose herself.
“Where are you going?” he asked, perplexed.
“Bathroom, be right back,” she called out. Running into the master bath, she ran warm water over a washcloth to soak it, never looking in the mirror, afraid she would see guilt there. Coming back into the bedroom, she shook her head at him, lying there. What had she ever done to deserve him? He was sweet and kind and loving and brilliant and sexy and funny and gorgeous. And he loved her.
Kneeling next to him, she began bathing him, washing each mark, turning him over and then over again. He allowed it, just watched her face, sensing she needed to do this for some reason. Some reason she would tell him soon or…and then his thoughts stopped as the warm washcloth reached between his legs and began bathing him there. He gulped. She smiled softly and sat back.
He took the cloth from her and got up to go into the bathroom and soak it again in warm water. Looking into the mirror, he touched his mouth, seeing the puffiness there, the redness. Smiling happily at himself, he wondered how it was possible to be so lucky, thanked God for the gift in the bedroom. Actually, he thought later, for two gifts, although he did not know it at the time.
Coming back into the bedroom, he motioned her to lie on her back and stroked down from her neck to her toes with the cloth. She rolled over, hands above her head and he bathed her. Leaning over her, kissing her neck, he breathed, “Mmm. Your scent. Your own scent. I love it.” He always had, he always would.
“Scent? Right now I probably have the scent of sex, Jack,” she protested.
“Mmm. True. And that is the best scent of all, “ he teased as he gently washed between her legs. She automatically opened them wider for him and he shook his head at the communion between them. He threw the washcloth in the general direction of the bathroom and lay back down next to her. Wrapping his arms around her, he said, “Okay, delay tactics are done. Now. It’s your turn. Talk to me.”
“The biting?” She bit her lip. “It’s…I’m not quite sure myself. It’s like I have this excess of….something. Need or emotion or love and…” She stopped speaking, unable to articulate herself in English.
“And you’re a physical person,” he said thoughtfully.
“Yes, yes. You know me, when I’m happy, I throw my arms around you and kiss you. When I’m angry-“
“You throw glass around the kitchen and shatter it into a million pieces for me to sweep up?” he said, laughing.
“Hey! You did that endless sweeping just to irritate me,” she countered.
“You’re right,” he conceded. “Because it’s so much fun. But-so why does it drive you so insane when I bite you?”
“Can’t you let anything go?” she asked, exasperated.
“Can you?” he argued.
“I don’t know, Jack! It’s like…it’s this little danger. The little sting. The edge….But with you it’s not so dangerous?”
“Oh, like on the stairs? I can take you places you want to visit, dangerous places, but I’ll keep you safe?”
“Yes!” she said, happily.
He smiled at her, glad they had figured it out. The biting….Hmm, he had made a promise to her before, it seemed like ages ago, in the car. Rolling her under him, he bent down and bit her breast just the way she liked it. “Jack, don’t tease, I know we can’t…”
“Speak for yourself. I’m not done,” he said, to her obvious astonishment.
“What’s left?” she asked, lying there, her chest heaving.
“The last course. Remember I said, promised, I’d bite you all over tonight?”
“Yes, yes, the way I like?” she asked eagerly.
“Yes, the way you like,” he said and bending over her, bit her shoulder softly. “Like that?”
“Like that. Go on, go on,” she pleaded “Please…” She would reiterate that word over and over as he bit and licked and kissed and suckled on what felt like every square inch of her body. She began to tremble and then to shake. Frantically touching him, trying to make him as wild as she was, she fed her own hunger. Pulling back to stare at her face, he touched it gently with his hand.
“This is insane. I can’t believe how much I want you. Again.” She pulled him down, fastened her mouth to his. They kissed for long moments, then she pulled back and bit his bottom lip. He bit hers and swept his tongue over it, then began biting his way back down her body starting with her chin. By the time he reached her hip bone she was murmuring incoherently, her hands grasping him wherever she could reach him. This biting was…too much.
“Laura, honey,” he said, from the vicinity of her waist now, licking and sucking her skin around the chain. “Tell me what you want.”
She shook her head, looked away, completely unable to speak in English at this moment, having to hold on to her control, her focus to resist the temptation to start talking, begging, screaming at him in Russian. Tonight, te intensity, the need was almost too much to bear. She sighed with relief when he gave her an option a moment later; thank God for Jack…he could always take her cues, even when he did not fully understand them. The best partner. Ever. Forever.
He smiled. “Can’t talk? I know the feeling. Okay. Let’s try this. Blink once for a bite, twice for a lick, three times for a suck and four times for all of the above.”
She closed her eyes in relief and happiness and then opened them again to see his face, his beloved face. “Well, that was one blink…” and said and bit her the plumpness between her legs so softly it was…indescribable. She let out a soft scream. He had never done that before. And she wanted him to do it again. He smiled again, that smug, possessive smile that made her want to kill him…after he gave her what she wanted, that is. “I told you I’d make you scream many times tonight. That was once more…but I’m waiting….Blink…You know how to do that, don’t you? Just close your eyes and think of what you want…how you want my mouth on you….Tell me. Now.”
She shook her head and smiled. Blinked twice. As he bent his head, with her last coherent thought for a while, she considered, what a game this was! He looked up and she rolled her eyes and blinked three times, then four. She would use this some other time on him, she knew -- at some party, she would start blinking and she would have him. Ha! He had given her a perfect weapon, a way to torment him and obtain what she wanted, revenge and…she sighed watching his mouth on her, incredible pleasure. She could not wait to use it against him. He looked up again and she blinked four times, over and over, while he smiled and moved back up her body to her chest. He followed her instructions and once again she sighed with pleasure at how, sometimes, he could take direction as well as she. When they wanted.
He kissed his way down her body again, making her writhe under him, making him moan with every movement. But then to her surprise he rolled over onto his back and pulled her on top of him. “Come up here, honey,” he said, pulling her forward until her knees were even with his shoulders.
“What are you doing?” she asked hesitantly, struggling for words, the heat, the haze in her blood in her mind, making it ever more dangerous to speak.
Pushing her legs open with little bites up and down her thighs, he finally settled between her legs. “We haven’t tried this yet tonight,” he said huskily. He licked his lips and pulled her body forward over him, his hands on her hips, then reaching around and squeezing her curves the way she loved. She groaned and pushed forward. “Blink for me now, honey,” he demanded. She stared wide-eyed at him. She would kill him. “I’m waiting,” he said, “I won’t do it until you tell me what you want.” He was so dead. But, god, this game was great, she thought as her body arched toward his mouth. Turning her head to the side, she caught sight of the shard of glass, glistening in the moonlight.
“Oh, no, you don’t!” he said suddenly and reaching over, opened the nightstand drawer and swept the shard inside. “No, I want honest responses. Just….be yourself. Let it happen as it happens,” he said, gripping her hips again with his hard hands, then slid them upward to her breasts and began teasing them again. “Mmm,” he said and she groaned. What would he say now? “These are so hard and pointy. It’s amazing isn’t it, how this soft flesh can become so…demanding? Somewhat like this?” and he slid his hands down quickly and delved inside her folds, taunting her, letting her come so close, but never quite….
“You’re ready to scream, aren’t you?’ She nodded. “So play the game honey. Don’t you want to win? You’ll win if you tell me what you want, won’t you?” Of course, he was right.
She blinked, slowly, twice. He smiled, that wolfish smile that made her want to pounce on him. That is, if she could move her limbs, which she could not. “Just the once? Only one set of two blinks? Hmmm. Let’s see. Are you that close to screaming?” He pulled her onto his mouth. Opened it and moving his head forward. His mouth touched her. His tongue stroked.
Once.
She screamed again, loudly, so loudly.
Then shimmying backwards to collapse on top of him, she asked, “What the hell was that?”
Smiling smugly, kissing her shoulder, running his fingers through her hair, he asked, “What was that? Hmm. I’m thinking…My dessert?” They both laughed, but he saw her eyes flicker with an idea. Oh, good.
“My turn,” she said and forcing her wobbly limbs to support her, she sat up and straddled him. He reached out and tried to position her over him, but she shook her head. Leaning forward she began touching him, caressing him, licking and biting him wherever she could reach. He began touching her, running his hands over her until she had to fight to remember what she was doing. Sliding down, she discovered that he loved it when she bit his inner thigh. Loved it when she caressed him while she did that. She loved his responses, his hands on her inciting her even farther.
Kissing and licking and biting her way up and down each leg, then up one side of his torso and chest and down the other, she came to a rest with her tongue dipping into his navel. He groaned and arched up against her. “Hmmm. What do you want?” she asked. He opened his mouth to answer - of course! - Jack was never speechless. How incredibly irritating he was…she needed payback.
He groaned at the look of mischief on her face. “What?” he asked, resignedly.
“Oh no, this is easy, Jack. So easy, you’ll like it. It’s a fun little game with blinks.”
“For the love of God!”
“No, for my love. Didn’t expect me to turn the tables on you, did you? But if you want it---“
“And lord knows I do! C’mon! Whatever you want…you have me.”
Looking pointedly down at the hardened flesh, she grasped it in her hands. He groaned. “Well, now I do.” As she scraped her nails up his length he groaned again and arched toward her hands. “Is this all you want, Jack? Tell me.”
“Payback?” he moaned, holding her hands still on him, then running them up and down her arms.
“Yeah, it’s a bitch, isn’t it? Soo…blink for me. Remember? Blink once for a bite, twice for a lick, three times for a suck and four times for all of the above.”
He stared at her for a moment, clearly debating. Then pulling her forward for a kiss that left her breathless, he let her go. Staring solemnly at her, he blinked. Three times.
“Oh good,” she said, “I haven’t had my…after dinner drink,” she said and he began laughing. Until she fastened her mouth onto him. Then he began moaning.
Later, they laid down on the bed again side by side, kissing, touching, connecting, feeling that tether tighten between them, he thought forever, once again in that endless vortex, that circle of the two of them. She thought of that glass in her nightstand drawer, thought of the walls that had shattered between them tonight. Walls that they had shattered together.
She poured herself like water over him, boneless, weightless, flowing like water over all his muscles, his firmness meeting her softness, his hands, rough and strong holding her to him, her hands, smooth and supple clutching at him, their mouths melding together and once again it began again for the first time.
Over and over and over that night, until he told her to sleep. Every time she awoke, he would be looking at her, touching her gently, playing with the chain, whispering, “Laura, I love you,” until her heart filled with such completion that she thought it would explode. Then she would whisper back, “As I love you. Forever-“ “And a day,” they would finish together.
They had created something that night….Something more than Sydney, although she would have been enough. But what they added that night…gave them everything. The fact that she had met his lack of control, accepted it, equaled it, took him in, as he took her in, created a new level, a stepping stone in their relationship. Although he had never lost control like that again, he no longer feared it, no longer kept the full scope of his needs and demands on such a tight tether, the tether she had begun loosening that night of the jewelry. No longer had to keep such control, knowing she would receive his wildness willingly, gladly. Nothing was ever the same again as the transparency between them that night forged new connections, new layers of trust.
TBC at Chapter 10 Part 4