Light My Fire Chapter 39.3/40
LIGHT MY FIRE
Ship: Adam/Kris from American Idol
Plot: Adam teasing Kris during the AI show and tour.
Notes: No Drake or Katy exist in this story. Danny is somewhat of a douche. Written upon request as a turnabout from my last story, Playing with Fire, in which Kris teased Adam.
Style: Humor/Dialogue generally.
Rating:
Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7
Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10 Chapter 11 Chapter 12 Chapter 13 Chapter 14 Chapter 15 Chapter 16 Chapter 17 Chapter 18 Chapter 19 Chapter 20 Chapter 21 Chapter 22 Chapter 23 Chapter 24 Chapter 25 Chapter 26 Chapter 27 Chapter 28 Chapter 29.1 Chapter 29.2 Chapter 29.3 Chapter 30 Chapter 31 Chapter 32 Chapter 33 Chapter 34 Chapter 35 Chapter 36 Chapter 37.1 Chapter 37.2 Chapter 38 Chapter 39.1 Chapter 39.2
Note: I had intended to finish up this chapter before I went on vacation, but then my ILs came to visit and I had to clean my house before my housesitter got here and my housesitter, who is an old friend got here, so... Sigh. Here's more of this chapter, but not all.
Chapter 39.3: A trail of fire
"Here." Kris handed Matt a small plastic package.
"What the hell--" Matt opened the package. "Ear plugs?"
"You said you wanted a break from the..." Kris grinned. "Uh conversations Adam and I have at night, so..."
Matt laughed. "Sorry we're all impeding your conversations, man."
"Nah. We just had a conversation in the men's room. Or rather I did. Adam's mouth was otherwise engaged."
"You. Did. Not!" Matt gaped.
"Totally did." Kris smirked.
"You were gone for only a few minutes!"
"Adam can make my..." Kris paused when Doug turned the corner in the hallway and walked toward them. "My car go from zero to sixty pretty darn fast."
Doug raised his eyebrows. "Adam can make that Ford Focus go from zero to sixty quickly?" He grinned. "What'd he do, retrofit your engine?"
"You might say." Kris looked innocently up at Doug. "Danny would certainly say that. I'd say, if we were talking about cars, of course, that Adam helped me find all of my spark plugs and makes them fire--"
"Speaking of talking..." Doug looked meaningfully at Kris.
"I know, I know. I need to decide how I'm going to announce I'm gay. And in a relationship with the Great Gay Hope?" Kris grinned. Adam hated that shit with a passion.
"You could just drop hints, you know, pave the way?" Matt suggested even as he thought that the way Kris looked at Adam was hint enough to anyone with eyesight. To say nothing of the way he'd talked about Adam to that reporter in some city or another.
Kris nodded and smiled in relief when Adam appeared in the hallway and joined them. Kris looked back up at Doug. "Matt's idea about dropping hints? The next time I'm asked in an interview about my favorite movie, I could say that it's Dick Does Dallas. You know, just as a hint."
"Dick Does Dallas?" Adam shook his head and smiled.
"No? How about... Freddie Fellates Frankfurt?"
"Rafael Rims Raleigh."
"Irwin Irrigates Intercourse." Kris paused. "There's a town in Pennsylvania named Intercourse."
"I know that."
"Of course you do."
"But seriously, Irwin?"
"Okay. Igor Irrigates Intercourse."
"That sounds like a monster movie. Or an agricultural documentary set in Russia."
"Fine, Mr. Smarty Pants. You come up with an I name."
"Fine, Mr. Worship leader. How about Isaac or Immnauel or Ishmael or--"
"Isn't Ishmael also the name of some character in a book?"
"Moby Dick."
"No, seriously. What's the book?"
Doug shook his head and turned to Matt. "Am I ever going to finish my conversation with Kris?"
"Right now?" Matt rolled his eyes. "Get real. They can have a conversation all night. Believe me, I roomed next to them."
"I am serious." Adam grinned at Anoop and Michael as they walked slowly down the hall in the same direction toward yet another green room in yet another arena. "Ishmael was the fisherman chasing after Moby. Remember, 'My name is Ishamael'?"
Thinking of another night in another theater when he'd run pell mell down a hallway, chasing Adam, chasing love, chasing his future, Kris knew he'd chase Adam all over again. As they entered the room, he nodded at everyone else, elbowed Adam and told him, "My name is Ishmael. I'm gonna call you Moby from now on."
Adam frowned, then his face cleared. Kris would never make a nasty comment like that about his weight. "No, you're not."
"Oh, you bet your ass I am." Kris grinned. As he caught sight of the green cast to Danny's face, he added, "Because you've got a sperm whale of a dick."
Adam rolled his eyes. "First of all, my ass isn't available for betting. Second of all--"
"Second of all, I'm not gonna advertise the size of your dick. I don't want any competition."
"Third of all, you have no competition." Adam smiled when Kris' face lit up at his words.
"Neither do --" Kris began when Danny interrupted.
"Yeah." Danny grimaced. "Until Adam finds another straight boy to turn. Let me guess, it'll be some little southern guy. Watch out, Kris, we're heading toward the south on this tour, you might find yourself watching Adam put the moves on some other cute little boy with an accent--"
"That's it!" Adam growled. Screw the visualizing, he was going to punch Gokey in the mouth so he couldn't utter his douchwaffle comments. He started forward, only to get an elbow in the ribs.
"I've had it!" Kris yelled and moved forward, trying to elbow Adam aside. It was his turn to punch Gokey. God, why did that asshole try to ruin every moment?
Allison nearly leapt through the air as she hurried to plant herself in front of Adam and Kris. It was her turn to smack Gokey. Really, they should sell rights to smack the asshole for charity. "C'mon, loser!" Allison called out as she stepped forward to slap Danny on his shoulders with both hands. "You're so fucking wrong!"
"Am I?" Danny smirked.
"Yeah." Allison smirked back and shoved back at Adam, who had been pushing forward. "Adam isn't looking anywhere but at Kris and if you can't see that, you're blind as well as stupid. And..." She gestured toward Kris. "Kris was the one always launching himself at Adam, not the other way 'round."
"Yes, indeed." Matt nodded, hoping to defuse the tension. "Adam was the innocent flower... of the.... desert, yeah, that's it. Adam was the innocent flower of the desert until Kris came along and --"
"Like a sudden burst of rain in the desert, caused Adam to bloom!" Anoop finished to a gale of laughter from the others. Danny threw up his hands in disgust and stormed out of the room, the very walls of which seemed to exhale in relief.
"Yeah, right," Adam said, still laughing as he pulled Allison in for a hug. "I don't think that story's going to fly given the fact that there's video of me wearing feathers!"
"Well, what story is Kris gonna tell?" Allison asked, kissing Adam's cheek before turning to face Kris. "C'mon, man, make a decision. I'm sick of waiting, Adam must be--"
"It's Kris' decision," Adam said instantly. He sucked in his upper lip. He would not boss Kris around, he would not boss Kris around, he would not...
"Ugh!" Kris groaned. "I'm sick of trying to figure this out, trying to figure out what to say-"
"Okay. Enough." Adam curled his hands around Kris' arms and pulled him around to face him and asked, "What story is it that you want to tell about you, about us? Don't think about it, just answer. What's your story?"
Responding automatically, Kris put his hands on Adam's chest and looked up, then was caught in the snare of Adam's blue eyes. He blurted out, "That I found out a truth about myself I didn't know and that I figured it out by falling in love. With the most amazing person in the world. That I'm happy and I hope he is too." Kris blinked, then smiled and relaxed into Adam's body. "That's it. That's my story."
"Then that's the story you want to tell," Adam said, nodding at Kris.
"That's it? Just the truth? Stripped down to the truth..." Kris trailed off as a smile of relief crossed his face.
"Yes." Adam nodded. "Save all the other details, the emotional truths for you, for us, for your family, for your album. Strip the truth you tell the public right now to the essential truth."
"I agree. Keep it plain and simple so no one can misunderstand," Michael suggested quietly. "You met someone and you fell in love. Just like a million people do every day. Love is always miraculous, but it's not shocking."
Adam closed his eyes, then opened them slowly to stare at Michael. "I... hoped you'd..."
"I get it, Adam. I get it. I may just be a hick from Texas, but I can learn and change," Michael said. "And the way I see it, is if I can come from that environment and learn and change, anyone can. If they want. Maybe it's time for people to learn the lessons I've learned."
"It's not going to be that easy," Doug warned. "And we're not out to teach people a lesson, just out to make Kris' life easier--"
"And sell product," Anoop interjected.
"Well, that goes without saying." Doug nodded.
"I just wanted to make it clear what the management point of view is," Anoop said quietly.
Adam looked down at Kris. "What do you think?"
"I think it's a good idea. It's simple and true." Kris leaned into Adam, relieved Adam had finally given him the push by challenging him.
"So we agree," Adam said quietly, relieved that Kris had finally made a decision. Like that freak out what seemed like so long ago, he had wanted now for Kris to make his own decision, but his patience had been running out. Luckily, the delay had given him time to think. "But I think there should be a little more strategy involved. A two-part plan. To start out, you lay the groundwork by saying that you've fallen in love. Then the media will be both salivating over the reveal of your loved one's identity and cooing over how adorable it is that that cute little small town guy found love."
"You think I'm cute?" Kris asked, prevaricating now that he was about to make a decision.
"D'uh. Listen up." Adam stared intently down into Kris' eyes and told Kris, "You set it up that people are talking about the story you want them to hear. You talk about how happy you are, how you never expected to find happiness in Hollywood... Smile a lot, be generally self-deprecating, adorable and charming. In other words, be yourself."
"That's the worst advice you can give some people..." Allison muttered, keeping watch at the door.
"But not for you, Kris. Be yourself and say you're in love. Everyone loves a good love story. You're a nice guy, people want the best for nice guys. Your happiness and your hope will get people be on your side. Then secondly, you reveal with whom you are in love. And since people will already be invested in your happiness, it makes it that much harder for them to turn around and immediately start throwing stones. And if they do, they look like hypocrites and even Bill O"Reilly hates a hypocrite. I think that's the best way to achieve a win in our society."
Doug felt his cheeks ache with the wideness of his grin. "If this music thing doesn't work out, Adam, do consider a career in pr."
"Adam does have both the utter lack of shame and fear that makes a good pr person," Maggie said from the doorway.
"Your parents must be thrilled to have you back home for a big concert like this," the Little Rock reporter began.
"Judging by the amount of food my mother was trucking into the arena, I think our after-party is going to be just as big as the concert." Kris smiled. "I can't imagine who all she invited to eat that much food."
"What kind of food? Your favorites?"
"Yeah, something called dump cake!" Adam interjected as he walked by en route to return a phone call from Danielle. He laughed as Kris reached out and grabbed his arm and pulled him into the interview and kept hold of him.
"I'm gonna win!" Doug taunted Maggie.
Adam tried to pull away, smiling when Kris held on firmly. "C'mon, Kris. You're the hometown hero. They want to hear from you, not the freak from California."
"Oh, I think everyone enjoys a Kradam interview," the reporter disagreed. She looked over her shoulder at her camera operator and grinned. This interview was going to air, she could just feel it.
"I know I do." Kris smiled up at Adam, even as he made a mental note to once again tell Adam to stop calling himself a freak. "Even if you do mock my favorite dessert."
"Dump cake." Adam wrinkled his nose. "I hope it smells better than it sounds."
"Oh, dump cake is a treat," the reporter told Adam. "Speaking of treats, has Kris mentioned if he has anyone special back home?"
"A hometown girl?" Adam grinned. "No, he hasn't. In fact and do correct me if I'm wrong, Kristopher, weren't you telling me that you were not the best date when you were living here?"
"Oh, really?" The reporter pressed. "In what way?"
"Tell the nice lady why you were a bad date, Kris."
Kris felt redness creep up his chest and into his neck. He glared up at Adam, trying to fight a smile, slapped Adam's arm and grumbled, "You are so dead. A horrible awful no good very bad kinda dead."
"He loves me. He really really loves me!" Adam winked at the reporter.
"I really really hate you." Kris twisted his mouth, then surrendered to the grin. "You are such a jerk."
"Awww, be steeill ma heart. These compliments will jess turn ma head," Adam said in a deep southern drawl.
The reporter gave into her own giggle even as she realized that there was some underlying vulnerability in the taller man's eyes. If her instincts were any good and they were, she'd bet he was a sweet guy underneath the eyeliner. Turning back to Kris, she asked with a smile, "So, were you really a bad date or is Adam just pulling my leg? Or even better, are you just trying to lead me off the story of some lucky girl back home?"
"Huh? Oh! Oh, no one back home. In fact...." Kris rubbed the back of his neck. "I probably should take this opportunity to, well, apologize to the girls from back home. I learned the last few months that I was a really bad boyfriend. Really bad."
"In what way?" Adam and the reporter asked in unison.
The reporter grinned up at Adam, who looked like mischief on legs. Long legs. "You know, for a California boy, I do like you." Touching his arm, she added softly, "And you're not a freak, you're unique."
"It rhymes! Call Matt over here, he'd try and make a song out of it," Adam said with a smile for the reporter. She was really nice, welcoming. He patted her hand.
Kris' eyes narrowed as he looked at the reporter, who was flirting with Adam. Who was his boyfriend. Not hers. Unconsciously stepping in front of Adam, Kris blurted out, "He's seeing someone."
Adam did a doubletake, then realizing he was gaping in astonishment at Kris, laughed and shook his head. "Oh no, this interview is about you. Local boy in plaid who made good. Hometown hero, afficiando of dump cake. Not me or my love life." He held out his hand to the reporter and as she shook it, he smiled at her. "Thanks for the fun interview. Good luck with the boy here." He smiled again and turned around, pulling a goggle-eyed face at Maggie.
Biting back her own laugh, Maggie stepped forward and pointed at her watch to tell the reporter to wrap it up. As Doug walked up to her, she leaned over and whispered, "I am so going to win this bet. You'll be doing Gokey's pr."
"No way!" Doug hissed back, watching Kris watch Adam walk away. "I'm... going to talk to Adam soon. Very soon. Even if I don't win, at least you won't either."
"That's not fair!" Maggie protested, ignoring her awareness of another game plan.
"All's fair in love, war, and avoiding problems like the Gokester."
"I've been a little anxious," Adam admitted, picking at his nail polish. "About heading into the south."
"Why? Protestors or..." Danielle asked, her head snapping up and her hand tightening its grip on the phone.
"Not the nut jobs. Just regular people."
Frowning, Danielle pondered that Adam was seldom nervous. Except when it came to his insecurities. Oh, hell. "You're not thinking that if Kris has trouble with his friends at home that he'll stay in the closet forever or... break up with you? Are you?"
Adam smiled wryly and picked at another nail. "You made that leap effortlessly."
"I've been leaping with you for a long time. We've caught each other waaaay too many times for me not to know when you might fall." Danielle paused when Adam said nothing, then asked, "Are you picking at your polish?"
"Hell!" Adam hissed, slamming his hand down on the table. "Okay, just say it."
"What do you think I'm going to say?" Dani asked, using her best and most annoying version of a therapist tone.
"I hate that voice, by the way."
"You're going to answer or I'll tell Perez about the time you borrowed my leopard-print--"
"Okay!" Adam said quickly, especially since Dani had pictures. "You're going to say that my insecurities are overriding both my rationality and my understanding of Kris and that I need to just fucking stop it."
"Bingo, baby." Danielle's smile faded. "Adam, you're one of the strongest-minded people I've ever met and if you could've just stopped those insecurities, you would have done it a long time ago. So, you know what?"
'No, but I'm sure you'll tell me."
"What are best friends for, if not to tell the hard truths? Haven't you told me some hard stuff before?"
"Yeah. Like the time those leopard-print--"
"Less said, the better!" Danielle laughed, relieved Adam was laughing with her. And he had pictures, so she was more interested in keeping him laughing than in getting him mad. "Okay, let me think...Those insecurities of yours are like... the monster in the closet. And you keep shutting the door on the closet, but the monster is still there, so you keep the light on just in case, so you can see if the monster gets out. And the monster always does get out. So what do you really need to do to the monster?"
"Get rid of it. Not lock it up in the closet, because it can always find a way to escape the closet. But get rid of it. How--"
"I know, I know! Remember that little workshop we took on visualizing your dreams? How about you visualize vanquishing the monster? Killing it or making it disappear by making it invisible or inaudible?"
"That's a good idea..." Adam picked at his nails some more, then stopped. "Wait. Visualizing. Can the monster look like Gokey?"
"As long as the monster sounds like you. Because it's your own voice you're hearing."
"Can you shut up, now?" Adam whined.
"As soon as you shut up the voice in your head that makes you worry that what you love is going to be snatched away from you because you're not worthy."
Letting out a long deep breath he had not realized he was holding, Adam closed his eyes and whispered, "Touche, sweetheart. I owe you. Big. What do you want from me?"
"How about one of those whips that gets thrown on stage?"
"I was going to keep them to vanquish my monster."
Reaching out to grab the bottle away, Kris said brightly, "No Coke for Gokey!"
"Huh?" Danny took another bottle from the ice-filled bowl. "What's your problem?"
"Listen up. You be nice. You're eating my family's food, drinking my family's Coke. I don't know what that means in Milwaukee, but around here, that means you have to act decent. Don't cause any problems tonight."
Danny shook his head. Unscrewing the bottle cap, he gave a mock toast to Kris. "I'm hardly your problem here. I've already overheard two of your friends talking about your creepy friendship with the weirdo. And some of your relatives are wondering why he's here with decent folk."
"Sure they weren't talking about you?" Kris smirked back, then looked away, looking for Adam. If anyone said anything like that to his face...
"Face up to it. You make the choice to be gay and you're not coming home. Gays can't get married here. Hell, gays can't even adopt kids in this state."
"How'd you know that?" Kris gaped, then slammed his mouth closed. Show no weakness.
"Google is my friend." Danny smirked as Kris glared at him and walked away.
"Well, good that you have one friend!" Kris sniped back over his shoulder. Ha. Allen shoots and scores, but no one heard.
"Am I going to meet every relative?" Adam laughingly asked as Kim pulled him toward yet another family grouping to introduce him as a 'close friend' of Kris.
"Well, it's better to meet at least once before the wedding."
"I beg your pardon?" Adam stopped in his tracks to stare in astonishment down at Kim. "Did Kris say something to you?" Because Kris had never said one word to him along those lines, which would've been helpful at beating down that monster, thank you very much. Which... he might want to admit to Kris at some point. But focus, Lambert. You're in a room full of people important to Kris. Make a good impression and worry about yourself later.
"I told you..." Neil whispered. "Leave the boys alone to set their own timetable. And pick their own napkins."
"I would prefer it if my grandchildren were born to a married couple. Because, you know I'm fine with him being gay, but I want my grandchildren born safely within the bonds of matrimony."
"Well, it's not like I'm going to accidentally get Kris pregnant," Adam pointed out, only paying half-attention as he looked around the room for Kris and encountered only Gokey talking to someone in plaid. Was that all they sold in this state, anyway? He looked down and smiled absently as Kim greeted an elderly lady who looked like she'd be hell on wheels and--
"Even in California, they can't do that!" The lady said with a grin.
"No, ma'am, they can't." Adam smiled at her, feeling tension in his shoulders ease slightly at the warmth in her face.
"Too bad. Because you look just like Elvis and we need to keep that sort of gene pool swimming. If you know what I mean."
"I...I've heard that before. It's quite a compliment. Thank you, ma'am."
"Nice manners. Good boy. Must come from good people." The lady tapped him on the arm, then turned to Kim. "Did I ever tell you, Kim, about the time I saw Elvis in person?"
"Yes...." Kim looked up at Adam apologetically.
"Well, I've never heard the story," Adam said quickly. This old lady was sweet and harmless in comparison to some of the looks he was getting. "I'd love to hear it."
"I knew you would. You have have the face of someone who knows how to listen. You're gonna go far, just like my boy, Elvis. People thought he was a bad boy too, but he loved his mama. Do you love your mama?"
"More than anything, ma'am. After all, no one loves you like your mom."
"Oh, he's good..." Neil whispered under his breath as he watched every female face within hearing distance soften and smile at Adam's words.
Daniel grinned and elbowed Kris, pointing with his chin across the room backstage at the arena. Their mother had finally extricated them from that great aunt or something who always talked about Elvis. "Mom is really having Adam do the do-si-do with our entire family. If we don't intercede, he might start running any minute."
"It's cool. Mom loves Adam." Kris smiled as he watched his mother keep her arm hand firmly curled around Adam's elbow as she proudly introduced Adam to some shirt-tail relation known for more hair than smarts. Hair in a mullet, no less. Geez. Adam was probably dying right now. He wished there really was a thought balloon over Adam's head.
"Shouldn't you be, you know, with him?"
"Mom shooed me away! She wants to win people over to the idea and said Adam was more charming than I was and I should go!" Kris said indignantly.
"I get her point." Daniel nodded and pointed his Coke bottle at Kris. "He charmed you right outta your pants."
"I usually have my pants off before he even says a word." Kris winked.
Daniel choked on his own surprised laughter and spit out his Coke.
"Whatcha talking about?" A friend of Kris' asked as he and a group of young men came up.
"Adam." Daniel elbowed his brother. "What else?"
"Oh, that's why you were laughing. I can see that-- OW!" Another friend stared down at Kris in surprise. "Did you just kick me?"
"Yeah. Shut it. I'm not a fan of making fun of people just 'cause they're different." Kris glared at a friend who he now wondered why he had ever liked.
"Hey, yeah. Different keeps it from getting boring, unlike all you losers!" A different friend agreed.
"Plus, he seems like a nice dude," yet another friend said. "I talked with him and he's damn funny. So is that Matt."
"Adam is... awesome," Kris said softly, his gaze focused on Adam's face as he talked animatedly about-- who knew what, it could be anything, anything but sports that is -- with Neil Allen and some other relative, his mother close to Adam's side. Geez, she had a grip on him like... Oh. Gokey was walking nearby. "Did I ever tell you about the time he punched Gokey in the stomach?"
"Really? That's hard to believe." One of the guys said skeptically.
Daniel shook his head. "Don't let the eyeliner fool you. Guy is tough."
Kris' old college roommate grinned, "He'd have to be to room with Kris. Did you ever wash any of your socks while you were on the show, 'cause when we were in the dorm... Damn, you know how you put the sock on the door.... That would keep not only me but everyone else on the floor away. The stench! Pee-euw!"
Feeling a little nauseous when he thought of the girls who'd probably thought that not only his socks had stunk, Kris shrugged and hoping for a neutral topic. "We did our laundry once a week or rather they did it for us. That was pretty cool."
"How'd that work? Did you actually separate your whites and your colors?" His old roommate teased.
"Why? I never did before." Kris shrugged as he remembered his roommate's disgust at his laundry ignorance. "Although Adam had his own separate laundry for his dry cleaning, his leather, after one time they mixed it up and this really expensive jacket, 'cause you don't wanna mess with Adam's jackets--"
"You know.... " The skeptical friend noted, "That's all you really talk about when you talk about Idol. Adam."
"He's right. Adam this, Adam that."
"Really? He captured my attention." Kris shrugged again, telling himself he needed to find a new non-commital gesture, while looking around them to catch sight of Adam. He smiled as he found him in the crowd, the black spikes of his hair waving in the air as he talked, Kris' mother next to him, smiling. Adam must be telling some story, probably at Kris' expense. "Well, he's...special. Like no one I've ever met."
"I think you have a crush on him!" One of his friends said loudly.
"He does!" Another friend said with a grimace. "Gross."
"And so what if I do?" Kris barked. He held his breath as silence fell like a sack of flour onto the floor. The explosion that followed messy and sticky.
"That's just... wrong, man."
"He's a dude. And in case you've forgotten, so are you."
"Or did your dick fall off in California when you roomed with the gay?"
Seeing the nervous tension in Kris' face turn into anger as the words piled up around him, Adam took a step forward, stopped by Kim's grip on his arm. "I need to--"
"Kris needs to do this on his own," Kim whispered fiercely.
"But--"
"I know, it's hard to watch someone you love go through something that might hurt. " Kim bit her lip. "But we have to let him do this. And then support him afterwards."
"Yeah, that's a nice thought, but number one, that's not how I roll and number two, the last time I did that, he told me he would have preferred it if I'd interfered. Sorry, ma'am." Adam gently pried Kim's hand off his arm and started slowly toward the circle around Kris. If Kris could handle it on his own, then fine. If not, it never hurt to know you had someone at your back. Or front.
"I'm just sayin'..." Kris blew a breath out and rubbed his forearm over his damp forehead, dislodging Daniel's hand on his arm, meant more as a support than a warning. This had been a damn awful conversation, like shoveling dirty smelly mud. Take it slow, he told himself. Slow... he relaxed muscles he hadn't even realized were tense as he met Adam's' eyes over the top of one of his friend's heads, never more glad that Adam was so freaking tall. Adam nodded slowly at him and Kris stopped shuffling his feet and straightened his shoulders. "Y'all know me. Nothing's changed, really. Including that I can't stand bigots of any kind."
A tight silence settled on the group, before one friend asked with a tentative smile, "Did you look at us like that? The way you look at him?"
"God, no. You're all ugly and you can't sing." Kris grinned, then seeing the disgust on a few faces, lost his smile and his patience. "And you know what, if you have a problem with it, with me, then screw you."
"Whoa!" A friend said in surprise.
"Hey..." His old roommate raised his hand. "No need to get all agitated."
"What happened to laid back Kris? You've changed, man!"
Adam looked at Kris' truculent expression. Laid back Kris was apparently part of StraightKris. At least for now. Once he got through this transition time, he'd probably go back to his basic nature.
"You're right. I have changed in some ways. I used to be so laid back, so... go with the flow. I never had a reason to be otherwise. But now... I've been in situations where it'd be wrong to let things go, wrong to go with the flow, the easy way."
"Like what? How?"
"Sometimes you gotta reach out and grab for what you want, or work for it, or get outta your comfort zone, or... run down a hallway and bang on a door and then grab it." Kris nodded and smiled at Adam. "And most important of all, I learned the lesson that above all Jesus taught us -- that sometimes you have to stand up for what's right, no matter what."
"Oh, go over," Neil urged Kim as they both tried to watch surreptitiously as Kris continued having an obvious argument with at least some of his friends and Adam stood by, saying nothing, but within reaching distance and certainly within the radius of Kris' gaze, given the way his eyes went to Adam's often and easily. "I know you'll hate to admit it, but... Adam was right."
"Kris and Daniel are different. Kris would've wanted that support," Kim said softly. "Adam knew that. Knew Kris wanted him."
"Kris is all grown up..." Neil whispered. "He's found his lobster."
Kim smiled. "I always loved that episode of Friends."
"I know, baby." Neil rubbed his wife's back.
"You okay?" Adam asked softly as he put a hand on Kris' back and urged him toward his parents, Daniel on Kris' other side.
"I am now." Kris let out a breath. Glancing back at the circle of old friends still arguing and watching some of them leave and close the door, Kris immediately looked back up into Adam's eyes. Where, he thought, the most important door was open. And vulnerable. 'Screw it!' he thought and added, "Or I will be as soon as I get a hug. And give you one too."
"I'm here to serve." Adam enfolded Kris in his arms until he felt Kris stop trembling and his own heartrate slow. Danielle had been right. The real monsters were in his own head. He had to work on silencing them and listening harder to others.
"How bad was it?" Kim asked as she hurried up and rubbed Kris' back.
"The good news is that they all said they wouldn't say anything. Some outta friendship. Others outta that Gokeyspeak that I'd be tainted until I found my mind again and they don't want to shame my family. I think I'm gonna lose some friends, which..." Kris took a deep breath and looked from his family to Adam. "It's a price I'm willing to pay. I'm not going to be anything other than me. But.. It was... not good. Thanks for standing with me, though."
Adam smirked at Kim for a second, then cleared his face.
"Shut up." Kim slapped Adam's arm.
"I didn't say a word." Adam put his hand on his chest and pretended innocence, enjoying the way the tightness left Kris' face, replaced by a smile. Kris had a long road ahead, but right now, he'd learned he could survive. First step. "Not one word."
"Your... smirky little face said plen-teee!" Kim accused.
Kris laughed, then turned it into a cough when his mother glared at him. "Adam... has an expressive face. Yup."
"If..." Adam paused, then added, "I were the type of person to rub it in--"
Kris burst out laughing, interrupting Adam's sentence. He gasped out, "Rub...It...In..."
Adam bit his lip.
"You're both....Ugh!" Kim grumbled.
"We can keep going forever." Adam shrugged. "Or you could be the bigger person and say it. Please?"
"No." Kim crossed her arms.
"Mom." Kris looked at his father.
Neil grinned. "Dear, what have we always told the boys? About admitting when you're wrong..."
"Yeah," Daniel agreed. "What was that you always told us about admitting when you're wrong? Something about how mature adults--"
"Fine. I was wrong and you were right." Kim huffed a breath out, making her bangs lift off her head.
Kris sighed at the sight. "She's gonna make us pay for that."
"Oooh, yeah. Good luck." Daniel smacked Kris on the back.
"Hi, sweetie!" Kim Allen smiled. "I know it's early--"
"It's five thirty in the morning!" Kris slumped back onto the pillow, then grimaced as Adam's head turned and one eyelid lifted to glare at him. He winced. "I thought someone had died!"
"Well, I know you boys get up early to do press--"
"Not this early. And Adam does not like being woken up this early, lemme tell you. If you could see the way he's looking at me..." Kris paused, unsure if his mother would appreciate the knowledge of where he was sleeping, but hey. They were all adults and if she was going to call at ass o'clock in the morning, well, as she used to say, there are Con. Se. Quences.
"I'm sure he's looking at you with love. How's it going with my handsome son-in-law--"
"You're not ever going to get to pick out napkins or tablecloths when Adam's around, Mom. Give it up."
Kim sighed, then grinned. "Can I... give you a bedding set for when you move in together? Would Adam like the satin sheets? In black?"
"Ewww! NO! Gross!" Kris exclaimed.
"Are you talking about chitlins? Last time she was on the phone she was telling me how those are made and just, no." Adam sat up in bed and rubbing his eyes. "Because those are--"
"No. She wants to buy us a bedding set. Satin sheets. In black."
"That's just sick." Adam wrinkled his nose and jumped off the bed to walk toward the bathroom. He couldn't plow into Kris' ass on sheets his mother had bought. "It also took care of my morning woody, so I'm outta here." He slammed the door.
"Thanks, Mom. You just freaked out Adam Lambert, which takes sumthin."
"We all have our gifts."
Buzzzz
"Hold on. Adam's phone just vibrated and I should check for him. He was expecting a call....Oh. Not him." Brad. Kris stuck his tongue out at the phone.
"Sweetie?"
"Sorry, Mom. I got distracted by Adam's phone and it was Brad."
"You are not going to go off like some jealous fool, are you? And throw his phone out the window or something?"
"No! I'm way too mature for that now."
"Yeah, right."
"Mom!" Kris protested. "Really, I'm--"
"I know. But a person's essential nature is not something you can change. You can control it, but that's about it."
"Whatever." Kris shrugged. "I'm not going to lose control and be jealous ever again. If for no other reason than it would make Brad gleeful and believe me, I don't want to see that look on his face ever again. Or get a text from him about how he's taking care of my boyfriend. That--"
"So... Brad is definitely part of Adam's life."
"Yeah, annoying little..." Kris paused. "Hey, Mom, Can I ask you a question?"
"I have never been jealous a day in my life--" Kim began.
Blinking in surprise, Kris paused, then laughed. "Aha. I get the slapping habit and jealousy from you. But that's not my question. Adam and Brad, they get along super well, even after breaking up and..."
"You have to trust Adam when he says it's over between them, Kris. His essential nature, he's not the type to lie or betray you--"
"I know that!" Kris snapped impatiently.
"Don't take that tone with me, young man!"
"Sorry, ma'am," Kris said instantly. "But what I wanted to ask was about drifting apart. Adam said he and Brad loved each other, but they drifted apart."
"That's horse hockey."
"That's what I thought too!" Kris nodded, glad his mother agreed with him. "You don't just drift apart. You have to pay attention. Right? It's like how you and Dad always went on date nights."
"Exactly. Love is... you can't take it for granted. In any way. But...well. It's a delicate balance. You have to hold on so you don't lose the person you love, but you don't want to hold on so tightly that the other person is desperate to wiggle out of your grasp just to breathe. It's..." Kim thought. "It's like when I was a girl and we went to dances. There were the guys that squeezed you so tight up against them that...yuck. Even if you liked them, you wanted to get away. The worst were the guys who kept squeezing even when you told them to loosen up. Then there were the guys whose arms just hung there like wet egg noodles and if their arms were like that, well, then what were their--"
"Mom!" Kris squeaked.
"Ha!" Kim burst out laughing.
"Honey? Are you tormenting one of our sons?" Neil asked sleepily. "And why are you calling either of them at this hour?"
"Because I know they'll be home since they're asleep."
"That makes sense," Kris and his father said in unison.
"I always make sense."
"That's what scares me," Neil Allen said and rolled back over.
"That's what I count on..." Kris said softly. "So, keep going about the dancing without the super creepy details."
"Okay, so then there were the guys knew how to hold you or listened to you when you told them what you needed. They were the keepers."
"They?" Neil asked. "As in men, plural of man?"
"Shh. Go back to sleep. I don't know why you're awake right now." Kim smiled and walked into the bathroom.
"You're just keeping Dad on his toes, aren't you?"
"Well, it's not a good idea to take your partner for granted. And sometimes they might need a little reminder." Kim paused, then added, "The way you and Adam look at each other right now, that's a feeling you should work on keeping."
"So you work at it?"
"Yes. In the sense of paying attention. And holding on? You hold onto that young man. He's a keeper. He's sweet and honest and so talented--"
"What about me?" Kris complained, even as he laughed.
"Is your mom gone?" Adam asked, peering around the bathroom door, having heard Kris say good bye, but knowing that didn't always mean Kim Allen was done.
Kris grinned and held up his phone. "Is Adam Fucking Lambert skeered of my mom?"
"Adam Fucking Lambert not being an idiot, the answer is hell, yeah, I'm scared of your mom." Adam flung the door open and strode back toward the bed. Pushing Kris' shoulder until Kris fell onto his back. Adam climbed on top of Kris. "She ruined my plans for sex this morning."
"Well, I'll be sure to tell her that."
"Why not?" Adam lowered his head and licked a path up the center of Kris' chest. "If she was going to give us satin sheets, we might as well ask for flavored lube."
"Total Christmas stocking material!" Kris laughed as Adam collapsed on top of him. Humming happily, Kris opened his arms and legs and wrapped them around Adam, holding him in a loose embrace.
"Seriously, it's not even six o'clock," Adam whined, nuzzling into Kris' warm neck. "You gotta talk to her about this insanity."
"I will," Kris promised. "I'm sure for you, she'll call later in the morning." Kris pouted, while running his hands up Adam's back. "For you, she'll do it. She likes you better than me."
Adam laughed. "Does not." He hummed softly when Kris' hands moved lower and squeezed his ass.
"She thinks you're awesome and I need to hang on to you. I agreed. You're sweet and funny and totally honest. And loyal. Like...." Kris paused and thought. "Like a dog."
"Like. A. Dog." Adam worked hard at frowning, biting back a grin when he apparently succeeded as Kris rushed pell mell to amend his words.
"I mean that in a good way. Man's best friend. You're my best friend and--" Kris bit off his rush of words as he watched that light flick on in Adam's eyes. Uh-oh and hell, yeah was about to happen, he knew it.
"So being a dog is a good thing."
"Yes!" Kris answered immediately, eager to know what idea Adam had this time.
"Excellent. Get on your hands and knees." Adam leered. "Assume the position. The doggie position."
"Oh, yeah..." Kris immediately rolled onto his front and into the position. When Adam didn't move, Kris wiggled his ass.
"You do wiggle your tail quite well." Adam curved his hand up Kris' thigh and over the roundness of his ass. "Do it again."
"I am not going to bark, you know..." Kris laughed. He hadn't really known you could laugh in bed, hadn't even occurred to him. But the fun they had everywhere just spilled into their bed. Or over the chair. Or one of the backstage bathrooms or best of all, on the stage lift.
"Oh, I don't know. I bet I could make you howl..." Adam got off the bed. He pointed at Kris. "Stay."
"Geez, you're carrying this a little far-- WHAT THE HELL?" Kris yelped as he watched Adam pull out some...strap thing with a chrome ring. "Is that a leash of some kind and where did you get it and why and no freaking way..."
"Didn't your mother tell me to put a ring on it?"
"My mother did not send you that!" Kris shrieked. "Wait. She told me to put a ring on you. Did she send me that and you stole it?"
"Why don't you call her and find out?"
Kris reached for his phone, but in mid-grab, he stopped. "No way my mother sent that. Daniel said she seemed lost by the innuendo about cock rings between him and my dad. So..."
"Can we possibly stop talking about your mom?" Adam asked impatiently.
"Well, actually.... " Kris teased, then yelped when Adam slapped his butt.
Stroking the slightly reddened skin under his hand, Adam raised an eyebrow. "I'd like to fuck you and it's kind of the opposite of hard to do that when you're talking about your mother."
"Mood killer. Just like your phone beeping and it's Brad." Kris rolled onto his back, his eye on that weird strap thing. He really hoped Adam was going to put that ring on his cock but--
"My phone beeped and it was Brad?" Adam wrinkled his nose. "Ugh, given the time difference, he was probably just getting home from some trick. Like I need to hear that."
"Can I ask you..." Kris looked up. "I know I can. Okay, here goes. You and Brad get along so well, do you ever think of getting back with him?"
"Brad?" Adam laughed. "Besides the fact that I'm in love with you?" Bending his head, Adam touched his lips to Kris' in a soft, slow kiss. "I'm so in love with you, Kris. I'm not going anywhere with anybody. I'm here til you kick me out. You must know that."
Sliding his hand into Adam's, Kris said softly, "I just wanted to be sure of you."
Adam paused, then smiled. "Okay, Piglet. I know the feeling. But you know what else? Brad is kinda like Tigger to me now. Fun to have around, but anything more? No, that's done. Burnt out, you know? I think we'll always be friends. Unless he does something destructive to me or my loved ones, we'll always be in each other's lives to some extent."
"See? Loyal, just like I said." Kris put his hand out and touched freckle after freckle with the tip of his index finger. "I think I'll call you Spot."
"I think I'll call you dead meat."
"Huh?" Kris blinked as Adam reached for the ring on the leather strap with one hand and Kris' cock with the other.
"Yeah, because after I get done taking your ass, you'll be dead."
TBC http://camillecarelli.livejournal.com/188980.html
Powered by website analytics technology.