Boring protag!

[cammykitty]

My writer's group just saw first part of Fakes & Familiars and they say Drew is a boring protag. Remember Drew? Those of you who were in my 2YN class said he was sweet! Now, I guess he's boring, but everyone likes Ozzie, the Great Dane puppy, so they'll cut him some slack

Comments

[temporus]

Two options that I see are: voice or situation. Without a sample of the text, it's hard to know if he's got a strong voice that will carry the story even if he sounds a bit of a nebbish.

On the other hand, from your synopsis, it sounds as if the situation/action, should carry the protag through. I mean, ordinary person in extraordinary circumstances should be a reasonable option. How soon do we see the character run into the extraordinary circumstances?

[cammykitty]

He runs into the extraordinary circumstances pretty quickly, but he doesn't know what to do about it. He flounders about for a bit. That might be part of the problem. He doesn't "get" what to do for awhile. I think you're right though with pinpointing both voice and situation. I'm going to push on him harder. I'm also going to ramp up his internal dialog. Perhaps he needs to actually say some of the snark he thinks. Hmmm... this is why its a rough draft.

Thanks!

[dmbaird]

In my own defense... ;-)
I believe I said he struck me as too passive and pliant, even for a mild-mannered teen. Somehow in the course of our conversation, it spiraled downward to the resulting label of "boring."
It's not that he's boring, I just wanted to see a bit more reaction from him, even if it is to throw up on someone's shoes from nerves. Like you say above, ramping up the internal dialogue should help with that. (Remember how none of us was really grooving on Sgt. Foster in Shadow Summit, and how much better she became once I gave her some internal dialogue?)

[cammykitty]

Oh, but he is boring! Or was boring. I've revised that section where the teachers are fighting over him. He did need to do more. I'm beginning to think losing your protag underneath everything else is a common first draft opening chapters issue. Pooka was like that too on early rounds.

Sorry that we (I. Perhaps I'm doing a royal we) put words into your mouth. Passive & pliant is pretty specific & does give me a place to go.

& BTW, I killed the Jung too. Jung go bye bye. It's been replaced with my new nursery rhyme.

[dmbaird]

No apologies necessary - the "in my own defense" thing was meant facetiously.

As for the first draft opening chapter issues - I totally agree. We all tend to concentrate so much on plotting out everything, we don't have time to explore our protags yet.
It's almost like getting to know a real person, when I think about it. At first, all we get is the surface impressions of the people we meet. With more time and interaction, we start to pick up on all their quirks. That's actually kinda cool. :)

Alas, poor Jung, I knew him well. The info was cool - you should definitely try and find a way to integrate it somewhere else.

[cammykitty]

I got the wink. I knew you weren't upset. & BTW, I've been working through your line notes. Thanks mucho! They are helping immensely!

Good analogy. It is just like getting to know someone. & it is also partly the well, I know my protag, so why do I have to tell you about him now because at the moment, look at my magic yellow dog!

Perhaps I can resurrect Jung, but it didn't go that early in the novel. Not when people aren't used to the little pre-chapter blurbs. (oops, almost typed pre-chapter burps. I don't need Dragon to mess me up!)