(no subject)
Okay, person who left this fucking obnoxious letter on my bed?
Dear Miss Georgia Lass,
It has come to our attention that you're a dead person with no self-esteem. While other self-help programs may try to teach you how to embrace your death and your differences and raise your self-esteem that way, we at Dead People With No Self-Esteem take a different path on the road to self-acceptance.
1. Admit to yourself that you are powerless to raise your self-esteem.
2. Come to believe that a Power greater than yourself lead to both your no self-esteem and your death, not necessarily in that order.
3. Make a decision to be at peace with both your death and your no self-esteem, because it's not like you can do anything about either one.
4. Make a searching and fearful inventory of all of the reasons why you have no self-esteem.
5. Admit to someone much better than you every reason why you have no self-esteem and brood about how unfair your death was.
6. Be entirely ready to resign yourself to not having any self-esteem and never gaining true happiness.
7. Complain to all of your far prettier, smarter, stronger, and more powerful still-living friends about why you are nothing compared to them.
8. Make a list of all of the people you've harmed as a result of your death, your lack of self-esteem, or both.
9. Beg for their forgiveness, but don't get your hopes up that they will. You'll just be even more disappointed.
10. Continue to think about the reasons why you don't deserve to be happy and admit fault, even when others harm you.
11. Don't bother to pray or meditate on the reasons for your death or your lack of self-esteem and don't seek professional help. You don't deserve to feel any better, you wretch.
12. Discourage others from trying to make peace with their deaths, trying to improve their self-esteem, or both. After all, misery loves company.
By following these simple steps, you too will learn how to wallow in your misery and accept the fact that nothing will ever change for the better. And when in doubt, repeat this simple koan to yourself:
I'm NOT good enough, I'm NOT smart enough, and doggone it, people DON'T like me!
Most sincerely,
Mortimer P. Dolor
Don't be shy. C'mon and admit it, so I can kick your ass thank you properly.
And, uh. Did anyone else get one of these stupid things? Not that I care or anything. 'Cause I don't.
((and now, it's time for me to call it a night! I'll be happy to pick up any threads tomorrow, so see you then. ^_^))
Dear Miss Georgia Lass,
It has come to our attention that you're a dead person with no self-esteem. While other self-help programs may try to teach you how to embrace your death and your differences and raise your self-esteem that way, we at Dead People With No Self-Esteem take a different path on the road to self-acceptance.
1. Admit to yourself that you are powerless to raise your self-esteem.
2. Come to believe that a Power greater than yourself lead to both your no self-esteem and your death, not necessarily in that order.
3. Make a decision to be at peace with both your death and your no self-esteem, because it's not like you can do anything about either one.
4. Make a searching and fearful inventory of all of the reasons why you have no self-esteem.
5. Admit to someone much better than you every reason why you have no self-esteem and brood about how unfair your death was.
6. Be entirely ready to resign yourself to not having any self-esteem and never gaining true happiness.
7. Complain to all of your far prettier, smarter, stronger, and more powerful still-living friends about why you are nothing compared to them.
8. Make a list of all of the people you've harmed as a result of your death, your lack of self-esteem, or both.
9. Beg for their forgiveness, but don't get your hopes up that they will. You'll just be even more disappointed.
10. Continue to think about the reasons why you don't deserve to be happy and admit fault, even when others harm you.
11. Don't bother to pray or meditate on the reasons for your death or your lack of self-esteem and don't seek professional help. You don't deserve to feel any better, you wretch.
12. Discourage others from trying to make peace with their deaths, trying to improve their self-esteem, or both. After all, misery loves company.
By following these simple steps, you too will learn how to wallow in your misery and accept the fact that nothing will ever change for the better. And when in doubt, repeat this simple koan to yourself:
I'm NOT good enough, I'm NOT smart enough, and doggone it, people DON'T like me!
Most sincerely,
Mortimer P. Dolor
Don't be shy. C'mon and admit it, so I can kick your ass thank you properly.
And, uh. Did anyone else get one of these stupid things? Not that I care or anything. 'Cause I don't.
((and now, it's time for me to call it a night! I'll be happy to pick up any threads tomorrow, so see you then. ^_^))