(no subject)
Batch three of five! Blahblahblah, you guys know how it goes.
Remember!
- Only accepted players can vote.
- Applicants, if you need to comment in response to voters, it would be nice if you commented anonymously. ♥
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Now VOTE. Now closed!
Character: Allen Walker
Series: D.Gray-Man (Unlicensed as of yet, scanlations to be found on yanime.com)
Application #1
Canon: Allen Walker is fifteen years old
and a recent recruit in the Black Priests, or
Exorcists; an order of the Vatican that is gearing up
for the end of the world. Akuma are weapons made of
dark matter and dead souls capable of shooting people
through with a viral infection. You end up covered
with stars. You disintegrate. It is
disgusting. Allen is ‘gifted’ by a cursed left
eye that allows him to ‘see’ the soul of an Akuma
(thus able to recognize them on sight) and parasitic
‘Anti-Akuma’ weapon in his left arm that allows him to
be verily badass…even if it tends to tie itself into
knots a lot. All and all, he’s a good little English
boy: gentlemanly, polite, and so very. very. put upon
by the whole damn world. No seriously, his main
incentive for not injuring himself is so that the
resident mad scientist (Supervisor Li Komui) won’t
have to PREFORM IMMEDIATE SURGERY on him…this often
involves powerdrills. Needless to say, he sort of
has a high tolerance for the psychotic.
I think the Supervisor might have made a mistake with
location of this mission.
...then again, this seems very much like him.
The good news is I haven’t seen any Akuma since I’ve
come to this place-- Camp Fuck You Die, apparently!
...what a strange name. The bad news would be the
abundance of a very different sort of undead. I’m not
sure if I could call them more a unpleasant--
they don’t fire off rallies of viral bullets and are
rather flammable...and to anyone who sees the mess on
the eastern path I, um, am sorry for that. I’m still
not sure how that happened myself.
I wouldn’t recommend going to the lakeside dock right
now, either. It’s...Just. Please believe me. It’s
definitely not something normal eyes need to be
looking at!
It’s also still wrapped around my ankle.
And, erm, twitching.
...well, then.
Application #2
Canon: Allen Walker is a naïve, emotionally motivated,
generally mellow type. Described as an idiot by some, often seen
keeping company with annoying people, he may not be the brightest
crayon in the box. His steadfast morals, amiable and virtuous nature
both a good and bad point. Allen feels the need to avenge people who
have been wrong done by, even if they are complete strangers, he acts
on what he sees in front of him. He is easily swayed by tragic cases
and could easily be taken advantage of, by those who know how to pull
the right strings. He is quite easily put out of his depth, or
flustered. On the flipside though, Allen will dutifully perform tasks
of surprising morbidity and gruesomeness.
His virtuosity and compulsion to protect those who are in a bad
situation is most likely influenced by his childhood. At a young age,
his parents due to a defective hand abandoned Allen. Mana Walker
fostered him but when Allen was still quite young, Mana died. Mana
being the only person he ever really had, he unintentionally turned
him into Akuma. The spirit of Mana cursed him for this(enabling him to
see the souls chained to Akuma), but Allen saved himself, when his
Anti-Akuma weapon activated for the first time.
Allen is surprisingly good at cheatinggambling and
street performing.
What an uncomfortable situation.
I would guess most likely Komui or Master's doing. Although, memory
blanks and unconsciousness seems more Master's style. I don't think
even Komui would have time enough be bold enough to
put me in a camp with undead, murderers and that encourages members
to…. Dress other campmates as Homosexual bunny rabbits?
I don't think it was the director's fiancé's death, which swayed
master. Probably one of his 'Life Skills' endeavors. Nevertheless I
shall make it my priority to apply myself in finding out who killed
the poor director's wife(even if he has become an Akuma. That
would be sad ;_;)Anyway.
I am in a tree.
I've been in worse situations before but…
It's just that these creatures quite like Akuma, but not really, came
at me, and I tried to crush them, but it didn't work, and this gun is
supposed to work, but I dropped it, and it went off, and now I'm up
here and there's this assortment of joints rattling at the base of the
tree, and toucans, and… and is that a hand!?
Tim Campi, where are you ;_____;?
Poll Vote!
Character: Watanuki Kimihiro
Series: xxxHOLiC
Application #1
Canon: Watanuki Kimihiro is a normal high school boy. He lives on his own, is an orphan, and is generally hard-working and sensible.
He also sees ghosts.
They also try to eat him, did I mention that?
Watanuki is indeed plagued by spirits that think he's yummy. One day whilst running from one of said spirits, he happens upon a strange house. He is forced inside by a strange power, and there meets Yuuko, a strange lady who claims to grant wishes. She says she can remove his vision and his curse for a price.
So Watanuki ends up working for Yuuko, so he can pay for his wish eventually. They then proceed to go have a bunch of wacky adventures involving wishes and spirits and Yuuko's baseball bat. xxxHOLiC is done in tandom with Tsubasa: Resevoir Chronicles, and the cast of TRC show up often in it, as they are also Yuuko's customers.
Watanuki, in general, is hardworking and honest. He also spazzes. A lot. If caps-abuse was a power, Watanuki would be a superhero for it. Anything and everything is game to be screamed and flailed at, and Watanuki often spends more of a panel making strange screaming noises than actually doing anything productive, though he pulls through in the end. He has the world's biggest crush on Himawari Kunogi, a girl in his class, though all she does is bring him bad luck, and he absolutely loathes Shizuka Doumeki, despite the fact that they end up being together more often that not.
Why do things like this only happen to ME!?
Yuuko-san, I want to STOP the crazy mythical monsters from chasing me! I don't need anymore practice of running from things trying to eat me! Why, to escape magical monsters, am I sent to a place where I have to run from *more* magical monsters!? This is *not* granting my wish here!!
I mean, sure, once I'm dead, I doubt I'll need the wish anymore...but that's not the point!! I'd like to stay alive to relish my spirit-free days!
It's not just the zombies, I could deal with those. I'm used to spooky supernatural things trying to eat me, as I said before, and besides, they're after the other campers too, not just me.
No, it's more the GIANT CROCODILES IN THE LAKE and the shotguns and the fact that most of the other campers here look like they're more of a threat than the zombies themselves!
I'm going to hate it here I just kno-!!
A ghost toucan is trying to eat my head.
WHY, YUUKO-SAN, WHY!?
Application #2
Canon: Watanuki is almost your average high-school student. He has the ability to see spirits, and these beings seem to have a thing for paying him unwanted attention. He has a bad temper, little patience, and also hates being bossed about. Watanuki is very good at housework be it cleaning or cooking and works especially hard at it; his employer Yuuko says that she'll grant his wish - getting rid of the spirits - after he works at her shop for an unspecified amount of time. He has a crush on his friend Himawari, but his relationship with Doumeki (a fellow student who innately keeps spirits away and someone Watanuki is grudgingly grateful toward) is one of jealousy.
I was retrieving water from Yuuko-san's well, and what happens to me? I get sucked in. Sucked in. Not that I haven't been sucked down other bodies of water in her presence, but this time was especially bad. There was a giant alligator, a radioactive lake, a few weird goats, and zombies. ZOMBIES. On top of that, the spirits are back (I will not admit to being grateful toward Doumeki), and one of them even introduced himself as Bob.
He says he likes my blood. I've already got enough mosquitoes biting me left and right, so I'd rather not have spirits coming up to me and saying that they'd also like some. I'm not an all-you-can-eat buffet, thank you very much. That means you, Bob. GET AWAY FROM ME. NOW. I actually don't know if spirits would drink my blood or not or if they just like the smell or something? Either way, they need to leave me alone.
I ended up locking myself in the kitchen (the blood-stained kitchen, mind you) shortly after arriving to escape everything, but the staff ended up kicking me out. I managed to make a little food for myself, but I had to throw it all to the zombies so they wouldn't eat me. (I think everything here wants to eat me.) So here I am without a cabin for who knows how long (I wish the director would put me in one already), in danger of being violated in more ways than one, and IT'S ALL YUUKO'S FAULT. Stupid bewitched shop. I bet she didn't even notice I was gone until dinner wasn't served!
And until Yuuko-san comes to save me? I'm going to feed anything that tries to eat me until it goes away. If I could just find some sticky rice and seaweed, I could make some onigiri…
Poll Vote!
Character: Yakushi Kabuto
Series: Naruto (Naruto @ wikipedia)
Application #1
Canon: Yakushi Kabuto is Orochimaru's right-hand ninja,
although he spent most of his life being raised by a medical ninja in
the village of Konoha after being taken in as a child. He appeared to
be a mediocre ninja, failing the Chuunin exam several times, while in
reality his skills exceed Jounin level, but finally revealed himself as
a spy for Orochimaru during the Chuunin exam in which Team Seven
participated. When acting in his Konoha persona, Kabuto appears to be
helpful if somewhat sheepish about his mediocre skills; his true persona
is much more intelligent and shrewd, excelling at medicine. Tsunade,
also a medical ninja, says that his instincts for medical jutsu may
equal or even surpass hers when she was in her prime.
To: Orochimaru-sama
From: Kabuto
Re: Scouting
While out scouting nearby villages to find other pawns volunteers
for our village, I happened across a dark swampy area with which I was
not familiar, and took it upon myself to investigate.
That was a week ago. Since then things have been interesting. I was
chased several miles across the swamp by animated corpses in various
stages of decomposition, shot at by various humans (?) who seemed to be
panicked, excited, and, unnervingly, sexually aroused by turns. Upon
stumbling across what appeared to be a small dilapidated village, I
nearly walked in simply to get out of the damn swamp. My sense got the
better of me and I remained concealed in the surrounding vegetation,
despite the fact that some of the bushes seemed both sentient and
inclined to slither under my clothes.
It's not a village, from what I can gather, but a "camp." And not what
we mean by "camp." Most of the people here are teenagers. They appear
to be trapped here, as I now am, by a force field with no apparent
source or power supply. They -- we, I should say -- are heavily
outnumbered by zombies, fruits, vegetables, the lake, the monster
in the lake and the mosquitoes. As far as I can tell, the
mosquitoes aren't sentient, radioactive or undead; they're just numerous.
While I assure you that returning to your side remains my top priority,
I nevertheless feel that this place could be beneficial to us. The
zombies provide a nearly endless supply of spare parts on which to
practice medical jutsus. Even those which are severely decomposed can
be useful; tissue regeneration is an area I feel I haven't adequately
explored yet. Also, nearly all the vegetation and most of the animals
appear to be toxic. I've tested three different species of plant and
two of animal and discovered at least three new poisons, two of which
appear to be psychoactive in nature. Lastly, the majority of the
"campers" appear to be endowed with powers and techniques the likes of
which I've never seen and might surprise even you. Studying and
becoming familiar with each of them would certainly help further your
goal. Those who are merely human will make excellent test
subjects cannon fodder servants.
What truly surprised me is that most of the genin from my last year in
Konoha appear to be here. Naruto-kun and Neji-kun are here. Neji-kun,
my lord might remember, is the Hyuuga genius. I can't stress enough the
rare opportunity to observe Byakugan at close range. Monitoring
Naruto-kun's ability to restrain the Kyuubi under high-stress conditions
also promises to be fascinating.
One of the Sand genin is here as well: Gaara, who apparently holds some
form of demon within him much the way Naruto-kun holds the Kyuubi. I
didn't get much of an opportunity to observe him during the Chuunin exam.
Sakura-kun is here, and while she is useless, I must admit that I relish
the opportunity to make her cry as often as possible. Taunting my
lord's various underlings just isn't the same.
Finally, my lord, the Uchiha are here. Both the Uchicha. I've
tried to watch Itachi-dono to make certain he doesn't harm Sasuke-kun,
but Sasuke-kun appears to be doing enough of that on his own. He's
managed to both get himself stuck in Stage Two of the curse seal as well
as put himself under some form of odd spell. The spell doesn't appear
to be harmful, just ridiculous.
I've got my spare Konoha headband on my person, so I believe I'll pose
as a member of their village for as long as possible. Other than
Naruto-kun, Sakura-kun, and Sasuke-kun, I'm not certain that any of the
other genin are familiar with my allegiances. Naruto-kun can be dealt
with by ignoring him and protestations of my innocence, Sakura-kun is
never worth worrying about, and Sasuke-kun should only need to be
reminded of the services with which my lord will provide him to keep his
mouth shut.
I confess I find myself almost excited by the opportunities this place
offers. It's like a fire along my skin, throbbing, burning, itching....
Dammit. I could've sworn that poison ivy wasn't there a moment ago.
Application #2
Canon: (Sorry, but there's no way I can avoid spoiling parts of
Naruto with this) First appearing to be a somewhat untalented Genin in
Konoha (having failed the Chuunin exam seven times), Yakushi Kabuto is
in fact much more competent than he lets on, and a spy for Orochimaru.
Currently, he has been outed as such and serves as Orochimaru's
right-hand man. Though the full-extent of his talents have yet to be
explored, Kabuto is known to be an exceptionally gifted medical ninja,
with an especial talent for regenerating damage to himself.
Personality-wise, Kabuto maintains a cheerful, helpful facade over
what his master calls a twisted personality (and this is from a person
called a monster masquerading as a man) at all times. Underneath his
always-polite demeanour he seems to have a fair amount of anger
bottled up, which we occasionaly get glimpses of, as well as a strong
tendency towards manipulation of others. Though he clearly has no
personal loyalty to his current master, he seems to be willing to put
up with serving under him in order to achieve an as-yet unrevealed
goal. In the meantime, Kabuto thinks nothing of using every trick,
dirty or otherwise, to further himself. It is also worth noting that
Kabuto also seems to have a fondness for stirring things up just for
their own sake (for example, he deliberately blew his cover in order
to see how the Konoha authorities would react), alongside some sort of
altruistic tendencies (healing Hinata during the Chuunin exam third
round matchups).
Nin-card #0257-a: Private addendum to official log of arrival at
Camp Fuck You Die.
Hmm. After checking twice, I am forced to conclude that my system is
indeed clear of any hallucinogenic substances... which means that this
camp is indeed populated by flesh-eating zombies, disembodied eyes,
oddly organised squirrels, strangely sentient trees, amorous purple
gorillas, psychic toucans, overly-friendly goats and whatever that red
misshapen thing that attempted to greet me with a hug and a cry of
'Eh-oh' was.
... Orochimaru-sama, you snaky bastard, you dispatch me to such
interesting hellholes places.
Ah well, that aside, I must say that I am debating whether to divert
from my mission to retrieve Sasuke-kun as to attempt soliciting the
services of the director of this institution- her advances in
reanimation and biological alteration are quite impressive, and could
be quite complementary to Orochimaru-sama's works. Her obsession with
finding this murderer and the resulting mental instability (as
evidenced by the above list of environmental hazards here) however,
may be a drawback.
That is also the reason why this report is currently being compiled in
a small hollow several meters underground. While the first zombie I
encountered wasn't much of a problem, and indeed offered a useful
opporunity for me to vent certain frustrations upon, the dozen or so
of it's companions that showed up, apparently attracted by the chakra
I'd used, were another matter. I think that mastering this 'shotgun' I
was handed is going to be one of my more immediate priorities.
ETC1: After half an hour observing the campers themselves, I think I
will be needing many, many more nin-cards to record everything
unnusual I encounter here. The director and her insane rules alone
will likely require multiple cards.
ETC2: ! I have just noticed what appears to be a giant badger
footprint in the distance. And standing in it is an indivual wearing a
disturbingly familiar red-clouds-on-black cloak.
...I'm at the same camp as the mentally unbalanced vessel for a demon
and the one ninja my master acknowledges as superior to him.
Orochimaru-sama, just because I have a talent for enduring ridiculous
amounts of punishment doesn't mean I like it.
New priorities- offer services as a medical nin and put forth a
friendly face so as to help in acquiring as many friends as possible
here at camp, in the event of any hostilities. Fortunately, several of
them seem quite easily manipulable friendly. Retrieval of
Sasuke-kun will have to be postponed in favour of these more immediate
concerns, the presence of a rather annoying number of his fellow
Konoha ninja and the barrier around the camp.
...but first, seeing as how a slightly disturbing amount of the
wildlife and scenery have amorous intentions, I think I should start
by devising some means of booby trapping my own body.
Poll Vote!
Character: James
Series: Pokemon - http://www.trsrockin.com/
Canon: James is the (arguably) male member of Team
Rocket. Though he comes from a ludicrously wealthy family, he now
lives a life of poverty, hole-digging, and being blown up on a nearly
daily basis. James enjoys crossdressing, bad puns, bottlecaps, and
crossdressing. He is of questionable sexuality, but he and his partner
Jessie are (almost literally) connected at the hip.
Jessie? Meowth? Wobbuffet? ...twerps?
HELP! I've blasted off into a perilous Pokemon preserve, packed with
perverted Primeapes! The lake is filled with Feraligatrs, and there's
this Tentacruel that mistook me for a schoolgirl, and...
Well, I guess I was still dressed like a
schoolgirl at the time. Though it was gentler than The Boss usually
is.
So then I ran screaming from the lake and found a bunch of zombie-like
ghost-type Pokemon (don't tell me they're actually zombies because I
won't believe you, I refuse to believe you, HOLY MOLTRES, JESSIE,
WHERE ARE YOU!?!? ;_; ). I tried to fight them with Cacnea, but it
wouldn't even come out of its ball! (Cacnea, you deserting
desert-dweller!)
If anyone needs me, I'm going to be curled up with the
silk in the Arts and Crafts hut, doing my best impression of a
Weepinbell.
Poll Vote!
Character: Beast Boy
Series: Teen Titans (animated series)
Canon: Beast Boy is a member of the Teen Titans, and is mostly
either loved or hated by fans. He's the resident comedy relief, with
cheesy lines and spazziness. Constantly abuses the word "Dude" and
has the power to shapeshift into any kind of animal. However, he's
always green, no matter what form he's in. Because he's been most
animals, he's a vegetarian. Enjoys tofu, practical jokes, video
games, comics, horror movies, and television.
Dude. You just play some little practical joke involving Hamster
Dance and all the security screens and suddenly you're packed in a
crate labeled Abu Dhabi! Except I don't think this is Abu Dhabi.
Well, I never had Abu Dhabi lessons, but I'm pretty sure it isn't Abu
Dhabi. Cuz there's like these zombies, and these toucans, and the
squid-octopus-thing, and...
Okay, lemme back up! The crate totally didn't make it to Abu Dhabi.
And instead I'm, like, in this camp? And Starfire is here! But see,
there's these zombies just like from Creepy Scary 5: Attack from
Beyond the Grave. But there's no dude in a hockey mask with a chain
saw, or a dude with severe burns and a hat. So I got that going for
me! I'm not sure where the zombies came from--but I TOTALLY heard a
rumor that they are the wasted husks of "Mardi Gras
Tourists"--whatever that means. Anyway, the zombies totally want to
eat our brains. And do something else kinda touchy and feely that
makes me feel uncomfortable wearing spandex. Dude. Not cool.
And there's these purple gorillas. I tried to turn into a gorilla so
I could like talk to them?
I decided I didn't wanna hear what they had to say.
Poll Vote!
Character: Sokka
Series: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Canon: Avatar: The Last Airbender is really just a lovely pseudo-anime about a boy
and his pet bison. But since neither the boy nor his pet bison is being apped
here, that's a rather moot point. Sokka in particular is a sardonic but
friendly guy who protects Avatar Aang (the aforementioned boy) and his sister
Katara (not the aforementioned bison) as the three of them journey to bring balance
to the Force elements and generally kick evil Empire Fire Nation butt.
Although he's supposed to be the "big strong man" of the group, he's
actually rather unlucky and more than a little wimpy; barely an episode goes
by where he isn't the damsel in distress. But he's got a big heart, so
he's really a pretty decent guy.
That's the last time I ask Katara to fix my pants.
Y'know, you'd think she'd be used to it by now. I'm the big brother,
she's the little sister. I'm a big strong man who goes out and kicks
Firebender butt, she's the kinda-weak-but-still-really-bossy girl who
cleans up after me. Big circle of life, balance between the elements,
yadda yadda yadda. I need my pants, man. I'm not Sokka of the Water
Tribe without my pants.
So when she throws them right in my face? Not happy. Bad enough I
lose my balance as a result. Even worse that I have to fall right
off the flying bison and into the middle of of some kinda swamp.
(We've seriously gotta install seatbelts on that thing. That totally
wasn't the first time I fell off that fluffy
looks-like-its-mother-was-a-spider-or-something bison.)
Now I'm stuck on some tree by my half-repaired pants, and I can tell
you right now that waggling my naked butt at some half-sentient fungus
is not my idea of a good time.
At least there's some kinda life out here. I saw some chunky girls in
purple wandering through a little while ago. I mean, okay. My last
experience with girls was kinda rocky -- it ended with me in a
dress and lots of makeup, don't ask -- but right now I'd be grateful
to have even a flying
lemur on my side. Hey! Over here! I'm the guy with no pants and
a boomerang strapped to his back!
…wait a minute. Those aren't girls at all --
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Poll Vote!
Remember!
- Only accepted players can vote.
- Applicants, if you need to comment in response to voters, it would be nice if you commented anonymously. ♥
- Gmail decided to autowrap funny. Lovely!
Now VOTE. Now closed!
Character: Allen Walker
Series: D.Gray-Man (Unlicensed as of yet, scanlations to be found on yanime.com)
Application #1
Canon: Allen Walker is fifteen years old
and a recent recruit in the Black Priests, or
Exorcists; an order of the Vatican that is gearing up
for the end of the world. Akuma are weapons made of
dark matter and dead souls capable of shooting people
through with a viral infection. You end up covered
with stars. You disintegrate. It is
disgusting. Allen is ‘gifted’ by a cursed left
eye that allows him to ‘see’ the soul of an Akuma
(thus able to recognize them on sight) and parasitic
‘Anti-Akuma’ weapon in his left arm that allows him to
be verily badass…even if it tends to tie itself into
knots a lot. All and all, he’s a good little English
boy: gentlemanly, polite, and so very. very. put upon
by the whole damn world. No seriously, his main
incentive for not injuring himself is so that the
resident mad scientist (Supervisor Li Komui) won’t
have to PREFORM IMMEDIATE SURGERY on him…this often
involves powerdrills. Needless to say, he sort of
has a high tolerance for the psychotic.
I think the Supervisor might have made a mistake with
location of this mission.
...then again, this seems very much like him.
The good news is I haven’t seen any Akuma since I’ve
come to this place-- Camp Fuck You Die, apparently!
...what a strange name. The bad news would be the
abundance of a very different sort of undead. I’m not
sure if I could call them more a unpleasant--
they don’t fire off rallies of viral bullets and are
rather flammable...and to anyone who sees the mess on
the eastern path I, um, am sorry for that. I’m still
not sure how that happened myself.
I wouldn’t recommend going to the lakeside dock right
now, either. It’s...Just. Please believe me. It’s
definitely not something normal eyes need to be
looking at!
It’s also still wrapped around my ankle.
And, erm, twitching.
...well, then.
Application #2
Canon: Allen Walker is a naïve, emotionally motivated,
generally mellow type. Described as an idiot by some, often seen
keeping company with annoying people, he may not be the brightest
crayon in the box. His steadfast morals, amiable and virtuous nature
both a good and bad point. Allen feels the need to avenge people who
have been wrong done by, even if they are complete strangers, he acts
on what he sees in front of him. He is easily swayed by tragic cases
and could easily be taken advantage of, by those who know how to pull
the right strings. He is quite easily put out of his depth, or
flustered. On the flipside though, Allen will dutifully perform tasks
of surprising morbidity and gruesomeness.
His virtuosity and compulsion to protect those who are in a bad
situation is most likely influenced by his childhood. At a young age,
his parents due to a defective hand abandoned Allen. Mana Walker
fostered him but when Allen was still quite young, Mana died. Mana
being the only person he ever really had, he unintentionally turned
him into Akuma. The spirit of Mana cursed him for this(enabling him to
see the souls chained to Akuma), but Allen saved himself, when his
Anti-Akuma weapon activated for the first time.
Allen is surprisingly good at cheatinggambling and
street performing.
What an uncomfortable situation.
I would guess most likely Komui or Master's doing. Although, memory
blanks and unconsciousness seems more Master's style. I don't think
even Komui would have time enough be bold enough to
put me in a camp with undead, murderers and that encourages members
to…. Dress other campmates as Homosexual bunny rabbits?
I don't think it was the director's fiancé's death, which swayed
master. Probably one of his 'Life Skills' endeavors. Nevertheless I
shall make it my priority to apply myself in finding out who killed
the poor director's wife(even if he has become an Akuma. That
would be sad ;_;)Anyway.
I am in a tree.
I've been in worse situations before but…
It's just that these creatures quite like Akuma, but not really, came
at me, and I tried to crush them, but it didn't work, and this gun is
supposed to work, but I dropped it, and it went off, and now I'm up
here and there's this assortment of joints rattling at the base of the
tree, and toucans, and… and is that a hand!?
Tim Campi, where are you ;_____;?
Poll Vote!
Character: Watanuki Kimihiro
Series: xxxHOLiC
Application #1
Canon: Watanuki Kimihiro is a normal high school boy. He lives on his own, is an orphan, and is generally hard-working and sensible.
He also sees ghosts.
They also try to eat him, did I mention that?
Watanuki is indeed plagued by spirits that think he's yummy. One day whilst running from one of said spirits, he happens upon a strange house. He is forced inside by a strange power, and there meets Yuuko, a strange lady who claims to grant wishes. She says she can remove his vision and his curse for a price.
So Watanuki ends up working for Yuuko, so he can pay for his wish eventually. They then proceed to go have a bunch of wacky adventures involving wishes and spirits and Yuuko's baseball bat. xxxHOLiC is done in tandom with Tsubasa: Resevoir Chronicles, and the cast of TRC show up often in it, as they are also Yuuko's customers.
Watanuki, in general, is hardworking and honest. He also spazzes. A lot. If caps-abuse was a power, Watanuki would be a superhero for it. Anything and everything is game to be screamed and flailed at, and Watanuki often spends more of a panel making strange screaming noises than actually doing anything productive, though he pulls through in the end. He has the world's biggest crush on Himawari Kunogi, a girl in his class, though all she does is bring him bad luck, and he absolutely loathes Shizuka Doumeki, despite the fact that they end up being together more often that not.
Why do things like this only happen to ME!?
Yuuko-san, I want to STOP the crazy mythical monsters from chasing me! I don't need anymore practice of running from things trying to eat me! Why, to escape magical monsters, am I sent to a place where I have to run from *more* magical monsters!? This is *not* granting my wish here!!
I mean, sure, once I'm dead, I doubt I'll need the wish anymore...but that's not the point!! I'd like to stay alive to relish my spirit-free days!
It's not just the zombies, I could deal with those. I'm used to spooky supernatural things trying to eat me, as I said before, and besides, they're after the other campers too, not just me.
No, it's more the GIANT CROCODILES IN THE LAKE and the shotguns and the fact that most of the other campers here look like they're more of a threat than the zombies themselves!
I'm going to hate it here I just kno-!!
A ghost toucan is trying to eat my head.
WHY, YUUKO-SAN, WHY!?
Application #2
Canon: Watanuki is almost your average high-school student. He has the ability to see spirits, and these beings seem to have a thing for paying him unwanted attention. He has a bad temper, little patience, and also hates being bossed about. Watanuki is very good at housework be it cleaning or cooking and works especially hard at it; his employer Yuuko says that she'll grant his wish - getting rid of the spirits - after he works at her shop for an unspecified amount of time. He has a crush on his friend Himawari, but his relationship with Doumeki (a fellow student who innately keeps spirits away and someone Watanuki is grudgingly grateful toward) is one of jealousy.
I was retrieving water from Yuuko-san's well, and what happens to me? I get sucked in. Sucked in. Not that I haven't been sucked down other bodies of water in her presence, but this time was especially bad. There was a giant alligator, a radioactive lake, a few weird goats, and zombies. ZOMBIES. On top of that, the spirits are back (I will not admit to being grateful toward Doumeki), and one of them even introduced himself as Bob.
He says he likes my blood. I've already got enough mosquitoes biting me left and right, so I'd rather not have spirits coming up to me and saying that they'd also like some. I'm not an all-you-can-eat buffet, thank you very much. That means you, Bob. GET AWAY FROM ME. NOW. I actually don't know if spirits would drink my blood or not or if they just like the smell or something? Either way, they need to leave me alone.
I ended up locking myself in the kitchen (the blood-stained kitchen, mind you) shortly after arriving to escape everything, but the staff ended up kicking me out. I managed to make a little food for myself, but I had to throw it all to the zombies so they wouldn't eat me. (I think everything here wants to eat me.) So here I am without a cabin for who knows how long (I wish the director would put me in one already), in danger of being violated in more ways than one, and IT'S ALL YUUKO'S FAULT. Stupid bewitched shop. I bet she didn't even notice I was gone until dinner wasn't served!
And until Yuuko-san comes to save me? I'm going to feed anything that tries to eat me until it goes away. If I could just find some sticky rice and seaweed, I could make some onigiri…
Poll Vote!
Character: Yakushi Kabuto
Series: Naruto (Naruto @ wikipedia)
Application #1
Canon: Yakushi Kabuto is Orochimaru's right-hand ninja,
although he spent most of his life being raised by a medical ninja in
the village of Konoha after being taken in as a child. He appeared to
be a mediocre ninja, failing the Chuunin exam several times, while in
reality his skills exceed Jounin level, but finally revealed himself as
a spy for Orochimaru during the Chuunin exam in which Team Seven
participated. When acting in his Konoha persona, Kabuto appears to be
helpful if somewhat sheepish about his mediocre skills; his true persona
is much more intelligent and shrewd, excelling at medicine. Tsunade,
also a medical ninja, says that his instincts for medical jutsu may
equal or even surpass hers when she was in her prime.
To: Orochimaru-sama
From: Kabuto
Re: Scouting
While out scouting nearby villages to find other pawns volunteers
for our village, I happened across a dark swampy area with which I was
not familiar, and took it upon myself to investigate.
That was a week ago. Since then things have been interesting. I was
chased several miles across the swamp by animated corpses in various
stages of decomposition, shot at by various humans (?) who seemed to be
panicked, excited, and, unnervingly, sexually aroused by turns. Upon
stumbling across what appeared to be a small dilapidated village, I
nearly walked in simply to get out of the damn swamp. My sense got the
better of me and I remained concealed in the surrounding vegetation,
despite the fact that some of the bushes seemed both sentient and
inclined to slither under my clothes.
It's not a village, from what I can gather, but a "camp." And not what
we mean by "camp." Most of the people here are teenagers. They appear
to be trapped here, as I now am, by a force field with no apparent
source or power supply. They -- we, I should say -- are heavily
outnumbered by zombies, fruits, vegetables, the lake, the monster
in the lake and the mosquitoes. As far as I can tell, the
mosquitoes aren't sentient, radioactive or undead; they're just numerous.
While I assure you that returning to your side remains my top priority,
I nevertheless feel that this place could be beneficial to us. The
zombies provide a nearly endless supply of spare parts on which to
practice medical jutsus. Even those which are severely decomposed can
be useful; tissue regeneration is an area I feel I haven't adequately
explored yet. Also, nearly all the vegetation and most of the animals
appear to be toxic. I've tested three different species of plant and
two of animal and discovered at least three new poisons, two of which
appear to be psychoactive in nature. Lastly, the majority of the
"campers" appear to be endowed with powers and techniques the likes of
which I've never seen and might surprise even you. Studying and
becoming familiar with each of them would certainly help further your
goal. Those who are merely human will make excellent test
subjects cannon fodder servants.
What truly surprised me is that most of the genin from my last year in
Konoha appear to be here. Naruto-kun and Neji-kun are here. Neji-kun,
my lord might remember, is the Hyuuga genius. I can't stress enough the
rare opportunity to observe Byakugan at close range. Monitoring
Naruto-kun's ability to restrain the Kyuubi under high-stress conditions
also promises to be fascinating.
One of the Sand genin is here as well: Gaara, who apparently holds some
form of demon within him much the way Naruto-kun holds the Kyuubi. I
didn't get much of an opportunity to observe him during the Chuunin exam.
Sakura-kun is here, and while she is useless, I must admit that I relish
the opportunity to make her cry as often as possible. Taunting my
lord's various underlings just isn't the same.
Finally, my lord, the Uchiha are here. Both the Uchicha. I've
tried to watch Itachi-dono to make certain he doesn't harm Sasuke-kun,
but Sasuke-kun appears to be doing enough of that on his own. He's
managed to both get himself stuck in Stage Two of the curse seal as well
as put himself under some form of odd spell. The spell doesn't appear
to be harmful, just ridiculous.
I've got my spare Konoha headband on my person, so I believe I'll pose
as a member of their village for as long as possible. Other than
Naruto-kun, Sakura-kun, and Sasuke-kun, I'm not certain that any of the
other genin are familiar with my allegiances. Naruto-kun can be dealt
with by ignoring him and protestations of my innocence, Sakura-kun is
never worth worrying about, and Sasuke-kun should only need to be
reminded of the services with which my lord will provide him to keep his
mouth shut.
I confess I find myself almost excited by the opportunities this place
offers. It's like a fire along my skin, throbbing, burning, itching....
Dammit. I could've sworn that poison ivy wasn't there a moment ago.
Application #2
Canon: (Sorry, but there's no way I can avoid spoiling parts of
Naruto with this) First appearing to be a somewhat untalented Genin in
Konoha (having failed the Chuunin exam seven times), Yakushi Kabuto is
in fact much more competent than he lets on, and a spy for Orochimaru.
Currently, he has been outed as such and serves as Orochimaru's
right-hand man. Though the full-extent of his talents have yet to be
explored, Kabuto is known to be an exceptionally gifted medical ninja,
with an especial talent for regenerating damage to himself.
Personality-wise, Kabuto maintains a cheerful, helpful facade over
what his master calls a twisted personality (and this is from a person
called a monster masquerading as a man) at all times. Underneath his
always-polite demeanour he seems to have a fair amount of anger
bottled up, which we occasionaly get glimpses of, as well as a strong
tendency towards manipulation of others. Though he clearly has no
personal loyalty to his current master, he seems to be willing to put
up with serving under him in order to achieve an as-yet unrevealed
goal. In the meantime, Kabuto thinks nothing of using every trick,
dirty or otherwise, to further himself. It is also worth noting that
Kabuto also seems to have a fondness for stirring things up just for
their own sake (for example, he deliberately blew his cover in order
to see how the Konoha authorities would react), alongside some sort of
altruistic tendencies (healing Hinata during the Chuunin exam third
round matchups).
Nin-card #0257-a: Private addendum to official log of arrival at
Camp Fuck You Die.
Hmm. After checking twice, I am forced to conclude that my system is
indeed clear of any hallucinogenic substances... which means that this
camp is indeed populated by flesh-eating zombies, disembodied eyes,
oddly organised squirrels, strangely sentient trees, amorous purple
gorillas, psychic toucans, overly-friendly goats and whatever that red
misshapen thing that attempted to greet me with a hug and a cry of
'Eh-oh' was.
... Orochimaru-sama, you snaky bastard, you dispatch me to such
interesting hellholes places.
Ah well, that aside, I must say that I am debating whether to divert
from my mission to retrieve Sasuke-kun as to attempt soliciting the
services of the director of this institution- her advances in
reanimation and biological alteration are quite impressive, and could
be quite complementary to Orochimaru-sama's works. Her obsession with
finding this murderer and the resulting mental instability (as
evidenced by the above list of environmental hazards here) however,
may be a drawback.
That is also the reason why this report is currently being compiled in
a small hollow several meters underground. While the first zombie I
encountered wasn't much of a problem, and indeed offered a useful
opporunity for me to vent certain frustrations upon, the dozen or so
of it's companions that showed up, apparently attracted by the chakra
I'd used, were another matter. I think that mastering this 'shotgun' I
was handed is going to be one of my more immediate priorities.
ETC1: After half an hour observing the campers themselves, I think I
will be needing many, many more nin-cards to record everything
unnusual I encounter here. The director and her insane rules alone
will likely require multiple cards.
ETC2: ! I have just noticed what appears to be a giant badger
footprint in the distance. And standing in it is an indivual wearing a
disturbingly familiar red-clouds-on-black cloak.
...I'm at the same camp as the mentally unbalanced vessel for a demon
and the one ninja my master acknowledges as superior to him.
Orochimaru-sama, just because I have a talent for enduring ridiculous
amounts of punishment doesn't mean I like it.
New priorities- offer services as a medical nin and put forth a
friendly face so as to help in acquiring as many friends as possible
here at camp, in the event of any hostilities. Fortunately, several of
them seem quite easily manipulable friendly. Retrieval of
Sasuke-kun will have to be postponed in favour of these more immediate
concerns, the presence of a rather annoying number of his fellow
Konoha ninja and the barrier around the camp.
...but first, seeing as how a slightly disturbing amount of the
wildlife and scenery have amorous intentions, I think I should start
by devising some means of booby trapping my own body.
Poll Vote!
Character: James
Series: Pokemon - http://www.trsrockin.com/
Canon: James is the (arguably) male member of Team
Rocket. Though he comes from a ludicrously wealthy family, he now
lives a life of poverty, hole-digging, and being blown up on a nearly
daily basis. James enjoys crossdressing, bad puns, bottlecaps, and
crossdressing. He is of questionable sexuality, but he and his partner
Jessie are (almost literally) connected at the hip.
Jessie? Meowth? Wobbuffet? ...twerps?
HELP! I've blasted off into a perilous Pokemon preserve, packed with
perverted Primeapes! The lake is filled with Feraligatrs, and there's
this Tentacruel that mistook me for a schoolgirl, and...
Well, I guess I was still dressed like a
schoolgirl at the time. Though it was gentler than The Boss usually
is.
So then I ran screaming from the lake and found a bunch of zombie-like
ghost-type Pokemon (don't tell me they're actually zombies because I
won't believe you, I refuse to believe you, HOLY MOLTRES, JESSIE,
WHERE ARE YOU!?!? ;_; ). I tried to fight them with Cacnea, but it
wouldn't even come out of its ball! (Cacnea, you deserting
desert-dweller!)
If anyone needs me, I'm going to be curled up with the
silk in the Arts and Crafts hut, doing my best impression of a
Weepinbell.
Poll Vote!
Character: Beast Boy
Series: Teen Titans (animated series)
Canon: Beast Boy is a member of the Teen Titans, and is mostly
either loved or hated by fans. He's the resident comedy relief, with
cheesy lines and spazziness. Constantly abuses the word "Dude" and
has the power to shapeshift into any kind of animal. However, he's
always green, no matter what form he's in. Because he's been most
animals, he's a vegetarian. Enjoys tofu, practical jokes, video
games, comics, horror movies, and television.
Dude. You just play some little practical joke involving Hamster
Dance and all the security screens and suddenly you're packed in a
crate labeled Abu Dhabi! Except I don't think this is Abu Dhabi.
Well, I never had Abu Dhabi lessons, but I'm pretty sure it isn't Abu
Dhabi. Cuz there's like these zombies, and these toucans, and the
squid-octopus-thing, and...
Okay, lemme back up! The crate totally didn't make it to Abu Dhabi.
And instead I'm, like, in this camp? And Starfire is here! But see,
there's these zombies just like from Creepy Scary 5: Attack from
Beyond the Grave. But there's no dude in a hockey mask with a chain
saw, or a dude with severe burns and a hat. So I got that going for
me! I'm not sure where the zombies came from--but I TOTALLY heard a
rumor that they are the wasted husks of "Mardi Gras
Tourists"--whatever that means. Anyway, the zombies totally want to
eat our brains. And do something else kinda touchy and feely that
makes me feel uncomfortable wearing spandex. Dude. Not cool.
And there's these purple gorillas. I tried to turn into a gorilla so
I could like talk to them?
I decided I didn't wanna hear what they had to say.
Poll Vote!
Character: Sokka
Series: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Canon: Avatar: The Last Airbender is really just a lovely pseudo-anime about a boy
and his pet bison. But since neither the boy nor his pet bison is being apped
here, that's a rather moot point. Sokka in particular is a sardonic but
friendly guy who protects Avatar Aang (the aforementioned boy) and his sister
Katara (not the aforementioned bison) as the three of them journey to bring balance
to the Force elements and generally kick evil Empire Fire Nation butt.
Although he's supposed to be the "big strong man" of the group, he's
actually rather unlucky and more than a little wimpy; barely an episode goes
by where he isn't the damsel in distress. But he's got a big heart, so
he's really a pretty decent guy.
That's the last time I ask Katara to fix my pants.
Y'know, you'd think she'd be used to it by now. I'm the big brother,
she's the little sister. I'm a big strong man who goes out and kicks
Firebender butt, she's the kinda-weak-but-still-really-bossy girl who
cleans up after me. Big circle of life, balance between the elements,
yadda yadda yadda. I need my pants, man. I'm not Sokka of the Water
Tribe without my pants.
So when she throws them right in my face? Not happy. Bad enough I
lose my balance as a result. Even worse that I have to fall right
off the flying bison and into the middle of of some kinda swamp.
(We've seriously gotta install seatbelts on that thing. That totally
wasn't the first time I fell off that fluffy
looks-like-its-mother-was-a-spider-or-something bison.)
Now I'm stuck on some tree by my half-repaired pants, and I can tell
you right now that waggling my naked butt at some half-sentient fungus
is not my idea of a good time.
At least there's some kinda life out here. I saw some chunky girls in
purple wandering through a little while ago. I mean, okay. My last
experience with girls was kinda rocky -- it ended with me in a
dress and lots of makeup, don't ask -- but right now I'd be grateful
to have even a flying
lemur on my side. Hey! Over here! I'm the guy with no pants and
a boomerang strapped to his back!
…wait a minute. Those aren't girls at all --
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Poll Vote!