(( FIVE PSYCHE LOCKS AGAINST WANKO ))

[the_wildcat]

[ahem]

. . .

The Ballad of Yzak's Mom
by takino tomo ♥

Now listen, dear campers, and you will hear
The tale of a fairy who sometimes comes near.
She visits each Mary and Susie and Tom--
It's the Spirit of Yzak Jule's Mom.

Well, Yzak's mom visits each midsummer's eve
If you show her that, in your heart, you too believe!
So take off your trousers and shake out those ants!
And put a picture of her down your pants.

Do that before bedtime, she'll bring you good cheer!
Your "Yzak's mom" luck will last all through the year.
And--you might not care for this, you're probably gay--
She'll transform the pic into something risqué!

But beware of Yzak, that mischievous imp!
With his terrible anger and wrists that are limp!
If he catches wind of where that picture goes,
He'll whip out his shotgun and swing at your nose!

But don't let him ruin your midsummer fun--
Let's show Yzak's mom we're believers, everyone!
If you don't yet believe me with all of your might . . .
Well, look at what I found in my pants last night.

(( t-that link is NOT WORKSAFE and thank you to Yooch for the horrible scan ♥ ))

EDIT: ONE NIGHT ONLY, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, WITNESS THE DEATH OF TAKINO TOMO