(no subject)
NICE TINY ROUND SO FAR. Everyone keep steadily working on your apps that haven't been sent in - you have until 6AM EST!
But in the meantime, have your first round of applications! VOTE VOTE.
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me if I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now VOTE. Closed!
Character: Zashiki-Warashi
Series: xxxHOLiC
Character Age: Who knows! But she looks like a teenager.
Canon: So what do snarky teenagers, potent magic, ghost stories, Clow Reed, lots of subtext, zany crossovers, and strange life lessons all have in common? Well for one, they’re all part of CLAMP’s most recent cash cow, xxxHOLiC. This series starts out as the story of one Watanuki Kimihiro as he tries to earn enough karma to pay for a wish to get rid of his ability to see ghosts, but as the series goes on it fills up with all sorts of CLAMP-style plot twists, and now it’s so complicated that it would take hours to explain everything. But we do know that Watanuki has lots of adventures with spirits, and one of those spirits is the meek house spirit known as Zashiki-Warashi.
Zashiki-Warashi is an incredibly shy spirit, which is unusual when you consider the type of spirit she is supposed to be. Traditionally, a zashiki-warashi would be a mischief-maker and do all sorts of harmless pranks, but this Zashiki-Warashi does everything but that. In fact, she tries to be helpful instead of causing trouble. However, her ‘help’ usually ends up causing more trouble for her friends, both human and spirit, than if she had just stayed out of it. For example, she’s accidentally stolen someone’s soul while trying to get chocolate for a boy she liked, and another time she wound up getting captured after trying to do a favor for someone. Her heart is in the right place, even if the results aren’t so great. But despite this, her personality is usually the source of her misfortune. She is more than a little awkward in a conversation, often stumbling over her words and taking a long time to get to what she really wants to say. She’s also prone to crying a lot, be it from sorrow, joy, or any other emotion. But while she does speak softly most of the time, she can be passionate about a subject (or person, as the case may be) if it’s something she really cares about.
Sample Post: Ah, e-excuse me, Mister Gorilla! I’m sorry to bother you, but I’m looking for the camp director. I have this package, and I was told to give it to her. …No, it’s not a candygram. A-and I’m not a plumber. It’s actually a birthday present from Mr. I.P. Freely. He said it was very important to get this to her as soon as possible, so could you tell me where to find the director? Or even a place where I can leave this for her would be good, too. …I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it, but I suppose you can check it. Here you go.
Ah, I’m not so sure that shaking it is such a good idea. It sounds like there’s something breakable inside of it. Please, be careful with th- M-Mister Gorilla?! What happened to you? You’re all- You’re blue! N-no, I don’t mean you look sad, it’s your fur! Your fur turned blue! And your soul feels wrong now, like it was tainted by some kind of evil… Was that because of what was in the package? Did Mr. Freely plan to taint the director with it? I-I’m sorry, I never meant to- I really didn’t know what was in there. I’m always causing trouble…
…oh, I know! There’s a spirit in this place, and she said that she’s good at purification rituals. Actually she said ‘body’ purification, but that counts, right? Maybe we could go to her home and ask her to perform a purification ritual. That might turn you back to normal. Come on, her home is in that lake over there. I know, it’s a little strange. The lake has been tainted by humans, but she’s still somehow able to purify things. I guess it just shows how we spirits can continue to live on even with humans changing the world around us.
There she is! Hello Marcy, it’s good to see you again. Sorry, but I’ll have to pass on your famous tea today. N-no, I’m not saying it’s bad. The tea you make is very good! Though I’m still not sure what your secret ingredient ‘raep’ is. We can have tea another time, really. It’s just that today I need your help with something. Mister Gorilla was tainted, and he needs to be purified. Could you do your purification ritual on him please? I-I don’t know much about your ritual, but it’s worth trying. It’s…It’s my fault he’s like this, and I want to make it better, so please…
Ah, so you’ll do it? Thank you so much, Marcy! I really-
…I-Is that the ‘body purification ritual’? I had no idea…O-oh my.
Poll Vote!
Character: Hirasawa Yui
Series: K-ON!
Age: 15-16
Canon: K-ON! is a show about nothing four girls who get together in the name of avoiding the dissolution of the Light Music Club, and form a makeshift band (it is also kind of about nothing, though). It's just a very fluffy, slice-of-life show that chronicles the friendship of the four girls and their slightly unreasonable goal of playing at the Budoukan by graduation. The characters are a tad archetypal: there's Mio, the bassist who is supposed to be the cool and collected one but is in fact VERY easily spooked and embarrassed; Tsumugi (or 'Mugi'), the rich and ladylike keyboard player; Ritsu, the loud and excitable drummer; and Yui, the idiot-savant guitarist.
Yui is clumsy and comes off as more than a little stupid sometimes, but it becomes evident soon enough that when she puts her mind to one thing, she can really excel at it. The problem is she is utterly unable to concentrate on more than one thing at once (i.e. playing her guitar and singing at the same time), and she has a very short attention span. She also has a bit of an overactive imagination with occasional delusions of grandeur. All that said, she means well and deep down she really wants to do well for the sake of her band, despite being so easily-distracted. She is enamored by sweets and cute things.
Sample Post:
Wow, this is a really impressive haunted house! Those zombies look totally real! Who'd have thought there would be a haunted house at the end of a dark alley? There was a sign that said something about abandoning hope but I ignored it-I saw a kitty, and it ran down the alley so I followed it! Why wouldn't I? If a cute kitty lives there, it can't be that bad, right? I should go down dark alleys more often!
Oh, but I was on my way to school, so, um... has anyone seen a little black kitty? I need to hurry up and pet it so I can get back on my way! I know they're supposed to be bad luck, but how can they be bad luck when they're so cute? I promise you won't get bad luck from it! Besides, if I leave without petting it, that would probably be bad luck! And if I skip school to chase a cat, my bandmates and I guess my teachers would probably be mad at me, which would also be bad luck, so, um...
-Oh, yeah, I'm in a band! Well, the light music club, actually! I have my guitar with me, see? I sing, too! I'm not so good at singing and playing my guitar at the same time, but I'm trying my best! You should all come to our show at the Budoukan when we make it big! Just tell them you knew the amazing guitarist Hirasawa Yui before she became super famous!
So, what's this haunted house called, anyway? It has to have a spooky name, right? ..."Seafood?" Is that really its name? It's not very scary, but I like seafood! Tuna is good! I'd prefer if it was called "Dessert," though! Mmm, I wonder what kinds of things Mugi-chan brought for snack time after school... mmm, cake... Ah, since it's the Seafood haunted house, are there people dressed as fish monsters? That would be pretty scary! I should remember that for the next school festival!
...Oh no, I lost track of time! If I'd known I was going to the Seafood haunted house this morning I might have gotten up earlier! Has anybody seen that kitty yet? -Eh? Is he really in your pants? That's kind of weird, but hurry and come over here so I can pet him, because I'm going to be late for school!
Poll Vote!
Character: Monou Fuuma (“Kamui”)
Series: X
Character Age: 17
Canon: In Tokyo in the year 1999, war was beginning. With the fate of the Earth at stake, the Dragons of Heaven and the Dragons of Earth, two equal and opposing forces, must battle it out. The Dragons of Heaven wish to preserve humanity, even at the cost of the planet. The Dragons of Earth, however, wish to wipe humans out, for the sake of saving the planet from destruction. Think environmentalists at their most extreme. Into this mess is dropped one Shirou Kamui, whose destiny is to choose a side to lead. What Kamui doesn't know is that Monou Fuuma, one of his best friends from childhood, is his “twin star”, destined to take on the role that he has left empty.
After Kamui chooses to become a Dragon of Heaven, his friend Fuuma undergoes a dramatic change. No longer the friendly and supportive boy next door, Fuuma has become the “Kamui” of the Dragons of Earth. As Kamui's other half, Fuuma brings balance to the force. He is much darker as the “Kamui”, and full of destructive potential. He also possesses the power to see the heart-felt wishes of others and is compelled to grant those wishes which are within his power. Even the destruction of a portion of Tokyo can wait, if someone wishes to live strongly enough. “Kamui” himself is very intelligent, confident, and darkly playful, and can frequently be found talking about wishes and the end of the world business. While “Kamui” is described as being icy cold and possessing an overwhelming power, he can become warmer and even remind someone of the person they care about most, if they wish for it. To a large extent, “Kamui” is what you wish him to be, for better or worse.
Sample Post:
Zombies of Camp Fuck You Die...you've gathered here today because you are convinced that camp is wishing for a change. You six zombies here before me seem enthusiastic about taking your destined place as the Dragons of Camp, the harbingers of that transformation. This place has been overrun by humans, demons, magical creatures, aliens, and other beings that have neglected the delicate natural balance. Camp wishes for a return to nature, to a time where cabins no longer clutter the ground and the swamp can grow wild again. Zombies, gorillas, and tentacle monsters could resume their natural place, if there were no campers and counselors left. Complete annihilation of all people within camp's borders would seem to be the only outcome, but...is that truly camp's wish? The unnatural is made natural here, with underwear growing on trees, toucans living outside of their normal climate, and high levels of radioactivity in the lake. In a place like this, would the campers ever be able to do more damage to nature than has already been done? This heartfelt wish for mankind's destruction comes not from camp itself, but from you, Dragons of Camp. You would have realized that for yourselves, if your desire for brains had not clouded your judgment.
I'm afraid that I must decline your proposition to lead you, as well. While I will take your offer for first pick of the freshest brains in the...spirit it was intended, it was completely unnecessary. Simply being able to grant your wish would have been enough for me, if this desire had not conflicted with another. You see, it seems that the moogles do not wish for any extra overtime, for at least the rest of the year. Becoming your leader and cutting a path of destruction though camp would be in direct opposition to the moogles' strong wish. Your dead minds have lost much of the subtlety and power that they held during life. Until you make a choice about what is most important to you, the moogles' wish will always transcend yours. But don't worry, just because I will not be leading you doesn't mean that I don't want to play with all of you a little more.
However, before you truly begin on your destined mission, there is one thing we can take care of. Your unresolved wishes are crying out for resolution, Dragons of Camp. You see, each of you has your own individual wish. A long awaited wish that I can help you realize, just as I helped this corpse in front of you. This zombie long ago lost contact with the empathy he formerly held, and no longer knew feelings of fear, pain, joy, or sadness. Despite all of that, he wished to know, one last time, what it felt like to have his heart in his throat. As you can see, he seems to have forgotten the real meaning of the expression, over time. It took a much more...literal bend, in what remained of his mind. Oh well. This zombie's wish was granted and I'm sure he felt at least a moment of fear once again, as I pulled out his heart and opened his throat.
So. Who is prepared to test the resolve of their wish next?
Poll Vote!
Character Name: Ashton Anchors
Series: Star Ocean EX
Character Age: 20
Canon: Star Ocean EX begins when Our Hero, space cadet Claude Kenni, messes around with alien machinery and gets himself magically transported to another planet. There, he meets a young girl named Rena who has mysterious powers, and finds out that he is the destined Warrior of Light who will save the world from disaster! Claude disbelieves at first (wouldn't you?) and their journey initially begins just as a quest to find him a way back home. Unfortunately, a mysterious object known as the Sorcery Globe is wreaking havoc on the countryside, causing animals to mutate into vicious monsters and an increase in natural disasters. When Claude and company get caught up in these effects, it's obviously up to them to sort things out!
Early in their journey, Claude and Rena's party is joined by Ashton Anchors. A traveling swordsman looking for evil to vanquish, Ashton comes across as a clumsy, dorky, self-conscious spaz, with a tendency to blame others for his near-constant run of miserable luck. If a terrible yet comedic thing can happen to Ashton--bad weather, falling off cliffs, getting dumped by a girl before he even confesses--somehow, it will happen! The best example of this is when the party meets him: when he goes to a mine to rid it of an 'evil' two-headed dragon, he trips and ends up with both its heads magically affixed to his back. Quite apart from being unintentional comic relief, though, Ashton has a heart of gold, and just wants close friends who won't abandon him for once. He might have gotten a little more closeness than he bargained for, though--the two dragons, Gyoro and Ururun, are capable of simultaneously possessing him, turning him into a particularly strong, capable and self-confident fighter for short periods of time. Ashton has no memory of these incidents afterwards.
Also, he has a bizarre wooden barrel fetish.
Sample Post:
Ahhhh! I've been left behind again! Why does this always happen to me?! All I did was go ahead to scout out the area for you guys; there's no need to try and lose me in a trackless swamp where all the trails look the same and I'd never know if I'd picked the wrong path to get back to you or not--!
This is all your fault, miss Urgrruagh! You're the one who said that if we came with you, you'd show us 'a real good time!' Well, the middle of this swamp isn't our idea of a good time, so take responsibility for this situation with your own two hands and lead us right back out! --what do you mean, you don't have two hands? I'm so sorry for questioning your hands, I could have sworn you had at least one and a half earlier, and I hope you can, um, steal one from your friend and attach it to your own wrist?! Never mind, that's not a very smart way of fixing anything at all! Wait, miss Urgrruagh, I wasn't questioning your brains, I'm sure you're actually very smart, so there's no need to sidle up to me and...ask me to give you head?! Absolutely not, because Gyoro and Ururun are not spares; they are friends, not food! Why do you need us, anyway? Why, I'm sure you have plenty of head of your own stored in those...barrels back there...
Oh my goodness! Could this be? I'd recognize those anywhere! Those barrels are specially handcrafted from the wood of the badtouch tree from the infamous lands of Sovyetrucia, each gently aged and mellowed by the surrounding essence of the undead into a perfectly-shaped body! Ehehehe, what a joy to caress these lovely subtle curves! Yes, the rumors are true after all: the barrels of Sovyetrucia are of such exceptional quality that it seems they can reach out and touch you! Oh, yes, magnificent wood, fondle me there~. ♥ Ahhh~ feel that silky-smooth quality, smell that hint of zombies, always present to mark the authenticity of any barrel from this region--wait, what am I saying?! Undead! Zombies! You're all zombies, aren't you? Why didn't I realize it sooner! I don't want to die here, surrounded by rotting swamp denizens, all alone and wanted only for my brains! At least you want me for something, but...oh, why am I so unlucky!? I don't--ack--
Hmph. Pathetically weak monsters such as you presume to be able to consume us? Do you want to die here, pitiful creatures? Remove any trace of yourselves and your ligaments from this place, and your little wooden pets, too! Our host may not realize they are a trap, but we are not fooled for a second. Flee for what passes as your lives, little demons, and heed that curious burning feeling known as fear. Yes, flee before we incinerate you in our wrath!
--Huh? Where am I? Where did everybody go? Did they have their good time without me and then just leave me all alone here to be miserable? They did, didn't they? Aaaahhh! I've been used!
Poll Vote!
Character name: Mello
Series: Death Note
Age: 21
Canon: [Spoiler warning!] Death Note begins as the battle of wits between the infamous Kira, a killer who can murder just by knowing a person's name and face, and the genius detective, L. When L is defeated, the task of bringing Kira to justice falls upon his two most promising heirs, Mello and Near. Mello, a chocolate-loving blond with a penchant for leather and religious motifs, is the elder of the two--although he always finds himself ranked second.
Mello's most defining trait is his desire to be the best. He knows he's a genius, and won't hesitate to insult someone of lesser intelligence. But growing up always second to Near has given him an inferiority complex more than capable of rivaling his ego. Unlike his rival, he allows his emotions to get the better of him at times, causing him to act rashly. He'll do anything and go to any length to outdo Near, even resorting to kidnapping and joining the mafia to further his goals. Such action is what eventually leads to his death, but also to the ultimate defeat of Kira.
Sample Entry:
A murder that occurred years ago with one victim and hundreds of suspects. And instead of narrowing it down, that number looks like it's been increasing as time goes on. I wonder if it's fun for the people in charge to keep bringing new players into this little game of theirs. Because to me, it sounds like they've been grasping at straws for much too long now. Hopeless.
By which I'm referring to whoever is running this pathetic excuse of an investigation. The situation is something I intend to take on, and there's nothing I take on that I definitely won't solve. I'm going to be the best, and where so many others have failed, I am going to prove victorious. I'm not letting anything stop me from catching the murderer first! Not that there's any competition. It's pretty embarrassing to hear how many detectives this place has stumped already, so I'm going to do the profession a favor by finishing this. There are more than enough dead around here too persistent to stay down. It's time someone puts Stephan Debussey to rest, don't you agree?
Though I'm currently at a disadvantage as far as resources...dammit! I suppose if I am going to have to end up enlisting some help, those zombies are my best choice. They're a little...a lot lacking in the intelligence department, but that's why I would be running the show. It's actually pretty lucky for me that there are people with their unique tastes to be found in such an isolated location; I only need to worry about them trying to eat me and not my chocolate. Handling death threats on myself is no problem, but I can't take additional risks when my Hershey's supply is this low. And while I'm thinking about that, I'll have to get in touch with the owner of this infamous white van. Whoever he is, somehow he manages to keep the thing stocked with a constant supply of candy, even with this place's isolated conditions. I need him working for me.
Well, now that I have a plan put in to place, I need to get to work. I'll have to keep myself under the radar until I've establish--ow! Who just dropped--? What the hell was that? A shotgun and laptop....
So. Is this their way of saying they knew I was going to come here all along? Finding me this quickly, they must have been monitoring my movements since I got here, watching and listening...
Well can you hear me now!? I refuse to let you treat me like some kind of criminal! Understand this, I'm not backing down. If you want to act as if I'm some sort of suspect then fine. Just don't get in the way of my work.
You can play around all you want, but I'm giving this business the serious treatment it deserves.
Poll Vote!
Character: Inoue Orihime
Series: Bleach
Character Age: 15
Canon: Bleach is the perfect shounen manga - Kurosaki Ichigo, who can see ghosts, fights with his friends and a very big sword against all manner of dead guys, developing amazing spiritual powers, and saving two or three planes of existence in the process. It's a manly story, full of blood and glory and testosterone and manliness!
And then, there's Inoue Orihime.
A beacon of silliness and light-heartedness in a vast ocean of epic battles and power-ups, Orihime is the cast's resident big-boobied ditz. With an imagination fueled by equal parts crack and Pixie Stix, and a shining smile for her friends, she helps Ichigo and Co fight the good fight with her magical hairpins. Yes. Magical hairpins. But just because she's a bit air-headed doesn't mean she's a dummy; in fact, she can be quite clever and perceptive (in her own way) and ranks third in her class. Some of her more interesting exploits have included imagining herself as a futuristic, super-destructive robot, mugging a couple of Shinigami for their clothes, and getting a piggy-back ride from Soul Society's version of Chuck Norris. Really, there's nothing Orihime can't do!
Scratch the surface, though, and you'll find Orihime is more than just another pretty face. She cares deeply for her friends, often hiding insecurity or pain behind a charming smile to keep them from worrying. In order to protect them, she even goes so far as to allow herself to be kidnapped by the bad guys, without a hope of a rescue. Not that she would admit to any of that; she's usually just happy to feed her friends peanut butter and fish milkshakes and be done with it.
Sample Post:
Battling her way through the harsh undergrowth, braving snakes and toucans and porcupines, intrepid explorer Inoue Orihime is... completely lost.
Well, okay, maybe not completely! I can tell by the angle of the sun and the moss growing on that creepy, moving vine over there that north is that way! So that means... there's swamp to my north! And... to my east! And, umm... pretty much everywhere except for south-southwest, where there's a glowing lake, actually. I wonder how they got it to glow like that? Maybe special lights, or the stuff they put in glow sticks, or glow-in-the-dark powdered drink mix?
Oh! And here's one of the locals now! Maybe you know why the lake glows, Miss umm... Miss Gorilla! And may I just say, that's a lovely shade of purple on you? You must have a very talented fur-dresser! Oh, how cute! You can even make a heart with your fingers! No, wait...
I've got it! That's exactly it, isn't it, Miss Gorilla! You need me, Inoue Orihime, Matchmaker Extraordinaire, to help with your love life! It must have been that charming zombie gentleman I saw back in the swamp, with the top hat and the monocle! Even though you're different species and at different stages of decomposition, it had to have been love at first sight! You saw his glazed and slightly moldy eyes, and your heart skipped a beat in your chest, and you knew -- you just knew -- that you were the one he'd spend the rest of his afterlife with!
All right! No longer hopelessly lost in the swamp, I now have a mission to see this ape and that zombie realize the fruits of their love! There's so much to do! I have to make you a new dress for a night out on the swamp! I can even make sure it doesn't clash with your pretty purple fur! And if you want, I can cook my famous lima bean and jelly casserole for your romantic dinner! And for atmosphere, well, I can't really play the accordion like in those Italian restaurants, but I've been told I play a mean kazoo!
You must be really excited, with the way you're jumping up and down and calling all your gorilla girlfriends over! Don't worry about me, though -- you don't have to pick me up and put me over your shoulder. I can walk! Umm... Miss Gorilla?
We're not going to see your fur-dresser, are we?
Poll Vote!
But in the meantime, have your first round of applications! VOTE VOTE.
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me if I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now VOTE. Closed!
Character: Zashiki-Warashi
Series: xxxHOLiC
Character Age: Who knows! But she looks like a teenager.
Canon: So what do snarky teenagers, potent magic, ghost stories, Clow Reed, lots of subtext, zany crossovers, and strange life lessons all have in common? Well for one, they’re all part of CLAMP’s most recent cash cow, xxxHOLiC. This series starts out as the story of one Watanuki Kimihiro as he tries to earn enough karma to pay for a wish to get rid of his ability to see ghosts, but as the series goes on it fills up with all sorts of CLAMP-style plot twists, and now it’s so complicated that it would take hours to explain everything. But we do know that Watanuki has lots of adventures with spirits, and one of those spirits is the meek house spirit known as Zashiki-Warashi.
Zashiki-Warashi is an incredibly shy spirit, which is unusual when you consider the type of spirit she is supposed to be. Traditionally, a zashiki-warashi would be a mischief-maker and do all sorts of harmless pranks, but this Zashiki-Warashi does everything but that. In fact, she tries to be helpful instead of causing trouble. However, her ‘help’ usually ends up causing more trouble for her friends, both human and spirit, than if she had just stayed out of it. For example, she’s accidentally stolen someone’s soul while trying to get chocolate for a boy she liked, and another time she wound up getting captured after trying to do a favor for someone. Her heart is in the right place, even if the results aren’t so great. But despite this, her personality is usually the source of her misfortune. She is more than a little awkward in a conversation, often stumbling over her words and taking a long time to get to what she really wants to say. She’s also prone to crying a lot, be it from sorrow, joy, or any other emotion. But while she does speak softly most of the time, she can be passionate about a subject (or person, as the case may be) if it’s something she really cares about.
Sample Post: Ah, e-excuse me, Mister Gorilla! I’m sorry to bother you, but I’m looking for the camp director. I have this package, and I was told to give it to her. …No, it’s not a candygram. A-and I’m not a plumber. It’s actually a birthday present from Mr. I.P. Freely. He said it was very important to get this to her as soon as possible, so could you tell me where to find the director? Or even a place where I can leave this for her would be good, too. …I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it, but I suppose you can check it. Here you go.
Ah, I’m not so sure that shaking it is such a good idea. It sounds like there’s something breakable inside of it. Please, be careful with th- M-Mister Gorilla?! What happened to you? You’re all- You’re blue! N-no, I don’t mean you look sad, it’s your fur! Your fur turned blue! And your soul feels wrong now, like it was tainted by some kind of evil… Was that because of what was in the package? Did Mr. Freely plan to taint the director with it? I-I’m sorry, I never meant to- I really didn’t know what was in there. I’m always causing trouble…
…oh, I know! There’s a spirit in this place, and she said that she’s good at purification rituals. Actually she said ‘body’ purification, but that counts, right? Maybe we could go to her home and ask her to perform a purification ritual. That might turn you back to normal. Come on, her home is in that lake over there. I know, it’s a little strange. The lake has been tainted by humans, but she’s still somehow able to purify things. I guess it just shows how we spirits can continue to live on even with humans changing the world around us.
There she is! Hello Marcy, it’s good to see you again. Sorry, but I’ll have to pass on your famous tea today. N-no, I’m not saying it’s bad. The tea you make is very good! Though I’m still not sure what your secret ingredient ‘raep’ is. We can have tea another time, really. It’s just that today I need your help with something. Mister Gorilla was tainted, and he needs to be purified. Could you do your purification ritual on him please? I-I don’t know much about your ritual, but it’s worth trying. It’s…It’s my fault he’s like this, and I want to make it better, so please…
Ah, so you’ll do it? Thank you so much, Marcy! I really-
…I-Is that the ‘body purification ritual’? I had no idea…O-oh my.
Poll Vote!
Character: Hirasawa Yui
Series: K-ON!
Age: 15-16
Canon: K-ON! is a show about nothing four girls who get together in the name of avoiding the dissolution of the Light Music Club, and form a makeshift band (it is also kind of about nothing, though). It's just a very fluffy, slice-of-life show that chronicles the friendship of the four girls and their slightly unreasonable goal of playing at the Budoukan by graduation. The characters are a tad archetypal: there's Mio, the bassist who is supposed to be the cool and collected one but is in fact VERY easily spooked and embarrassed; Tsumugi (or 'Mugi'), the rich and ladylike keyboard player; Ritsu, the loud and excitable drummer; and Yui, the idiot-savant guitarist.
Yui is clumsy and comes off as more than a little stupid sometimes, but it becomes evident soon enough that when she puts her mind to one thing, she can really excel at it. The problem is she is utterly unable to concentrate on more than one thing at once (i.e. playing her guitar and singing at the same time), and she has a very short attention span. She also has a bit of an overactive imagination with occasional delusions of grandeur. All that said, she means well and deep down she really wants to do well for the sake of her band, despite being so easily-distracted. She is enamored by sweets and cute things.
Sample Post:
Wow, this is a really impressive haunted house! Those zombies look totally real! Who'd have thought there would be a haunted house at the end of a dark alley? There was a sign that said something about abandoning hope but I ignored it-I saw a kitty, and it ran down the alley so I followed it! Why wouldn't I? If a cute kitty lives there, it can't be that bad, right? I should go down dark alleys more often!
Oh, but I was on my way to school, so, um... has anyone seen a little black kitty? I need to hurry up and pet it so I can get back on my way! I know they're supposed to be bad luck, but how can they be bad luck when they're so cute? I promise you won't get bad luck from it! Besides, if I leave without petting it, that would probably be bad luck! And if I skip school to chase a cat, my bandmates and I guess my teachers would probably be mad at me, which would also be bad luck, so, um...
-Oh, yeah, I'm in a band! Well, the light music club, actually! I have my guitar with me, see? I sing, too! I'm not so good at singing and playing my guitar at the same time, but I'm trying my best! You should all come to our show at the Budoukan when we make it big! Just tell them you knew the amazing guitarist Hirasawa Yui before she became super famous!
So, what's this haunted house called, anyway? It has to have a spooky name, right? ..."Seafood?" Is that really its name? It's not very scary, but I like seafood! Tuna is good! I'd prefer if it was called "Dessert," though! Mmm, I wonder what kinds of things Mugi-chan brought for snack time after school... mmm, cake... Ah, since it's the Seafood haunted house, are there people dressed as fish monsters? That would be pretty scary! I should remember that for the next school festival!
...Oh no, I lost track of time! If I'd known I was going to the Seafood haunted house this morning I might have gotten up earlier! Has anybody seen that kitty yet? -Eh? Is he really in your pants? That's kind of weird, but hurry and come over here so I can pet him, because I'm going to be late for school!
Poll Vote!
Character: Monou Fuuma (“Kamui”)
Series: X
Character Age: 17
Canon: In Tokyo in the year 1999, war was beginning. With the fate of the Earth at stake, the Dragons of Heaven and the Dragons of Earth, two equal and opposing forces, must battle it out. The Dragons of Heaven wish to preserve humanity, even at the cost of the planet. The Dragons of Earth, however, wish to wipe humans out, for the sake of saving the planet from destruction. Think environmentalists at their most extreme. Into this mess is dropped one Shirou Kamui, whose destiny is to choose a side to lead. What Kamui doesn't know is that Monou Fuuma, one of his best friends from childhood, is his “twin star”, destined to take on the role that he has left empty.
After Kamui chooses to become a Dragon of Heaven, his friend Fuuma undergoes a dramatic change. No longer the friendly and supportive boy next door, Fuuma has become the “Kamui” of the Dragons of Earth. As Kamui's other half, Fuuma brings balance to the force. He is much darker as the “Kamui”, and full of destructive potential. He also possesses the power to see the heart-felt wishes of others and is compelled to grant those wishes which are within his power. Even the destruction of a portion of Tokyo can wait, if someone wishes to live strongly enough. “Kamui” himself is very intelligent, confident, and darkly playful, and can frequently be found talking about wishes and the end of the world business. While “Kamui” is described as being icy cold and possessing an overwhelming power, he can become warmer and even remind someone of the person they care about most, if they wish for it. To a large extent, “Kamui” is what you wish him to be, for better or worse.
Sample Post:
Zombies of Camp Fuck You Die...you've gathered here today because you are convinced that camp is wishing for a change. You six zombies here before me seem enthusiastic about taking your destined place as the Dragons of Camp, the harbingers of that transformation. This place has been overrun by humans, demons, magical creatures, aliens, and other beings that have neglected the delicate natural balance. Camp wishes for a return to nature, to a time where cabins no longer clutter the ground and the swamp can grow wild again. Zombies, gorillas, and tentacle monsters could resume their natural place, if there were no campers and counselors left. Complete annihilation of all people within camp's borders would seem to be the only outcome, but...is that truly camp's wish? The unnatural is made natural here, with underwear growing on trees, toucans living outside of their normal climate, and high levels of radioactivity in the lake. In a place like this, would the campers ever be able to do more damage to nature than has already been done? This heartfelt wish for mankind's destruction comes not from camp itself, but from you, Dragons of Camp. You would have realized that for yourselves, if your desire for brains had not clouded your judgment.
I'm afraid that I must decline your proposition to lead you, as well. While I will take your offer for first pick of the freshest brains in the...spirit it was intended, it was completely unnecessary. Simply being able to grant your wish would have been enough for me, if this desire had not conflicted with another. You see, it seems that the moogles do not wish for any extra overtime, for at least the rest of the year. Becoming your leader and cutting a path of destruction though camp would be in direct opposition to the moogles' strong wish. Your dead minds have lost much of the subtlety and power that they held during life. Until you make a choice about what is most important to you, the moogles' wish will always transcend yours. But don't worry, just because I will not be leading you doesn't mean that I don't want to play with all of you a little more.
However, before you truly begin on your destined mission, there is one thing we can take care of. Your unresolved wishes are crying out for resolution, Dragons of Camp. You see, each of you has your own individual wish. A long awaited wish that I can help you realize, just as I helped this corpse in front of you. This zombie long ago lost contact with the empathy he formerly held, and no longer knew feelings of fear, pain, joy, or sadness. Despite all of that, he wished to know, one last time, what it felt like to have his heart in his throat. As you can see, he seems to have forgotten the real meaning of the expression, over time. It took a much more...literal bend, in what remained of his mind. Oh well. This zombie's wish was granted and I'm sure he felt at least a moment of fear once again, as I pulled out his heart and opened his throat.
So. Who is prepared to test the resolve of their wish next?
Poll Vote!
Character Name: Ashton Anchors
Series: Star Ocean EX
Character Age: 20
Canon: Star Ocean EX begins when Our Hero, space cadet Claude Kenni, messes around with alien machinery and gets himself magically transported to another planet. There, he meets a young girl named Rena who has mysterious powers, and finds out that he is the destined Warrior of Light who will save the world from disaster! Claude disbelieves at first (wouldn't you?) and their journey initially begins just as a quest to find him a way back home. Unfortunately, a mysterious object known as the Sorcery Globe is wreaking havoc on the countryside, causing animals to mutate into vicious monsters and an increase in natural disasters. When Claude and company get caught up in these effects, it's obviously up to them to sort things out!
Early in their journey, Claude and Rena's party is joined by Ashton Anchors. A traveling swordsman looking for evil to vanquish, Ashton comes across as a clumsy, dorky, self-conscious spaz, with a tendency to blame others for his near-constant run of miserable luck. If a terrible yet comedic thing can happen to Ashton--bad weather, falling off cliffs, getting dumped by a girl before he even confesses--somehow, it will happen! The best example of this is when the party meets him: when he goes to a mine to rid it of an 'evil' two-headed dragon, he trips and ends up with both its heads magically affixed to his back. Quite apart from being unintentional comic relief, though, Ashton has a heart of gold, and just wants close friends who won't abandon him for once. He might have gotten a little more closeness than he bargained for, though--the two dragons, Gyoro and Ururun, are capable of simultaneously possessing him, turning him into a particularly strong, capable and self-confident fighter for short periods of time. Ashton has no memory of these incidents afterwards.
Also, he has a bizarre wooden barrel fetish.
Sample Post:
Ahhhh! I've been left behind again! Why does this always happen to me?! All I did was go ahead to scout out the area for you guys; there's no need to try and lose me in a trackless swamp where all the trails look the same and I'd never know if I'd picked the wrong path to get back to you or not--!
This is all your fault, miss Urgrruagh! You're the one who said that if we came with you, you'd show us 'a real good time!' Well, the middle of this swamp isn't our idea of a good time, so take responsibility for this situation with your own two hands and lead us right back out! --what do you mean, you don't have two hands? I'm so sorry for questioning your hands, I could have sworn you had at least one and a half earlier, and I hope you can, um, steal one from your friend and attach it to your own wrist?! Never mind, that's not a very smart way of fixing anything at all! Wait, miss Urgrruagh, I wasn't questioning your brains, I'm sure you're actually very smart, so there's no need to sidle up to me and...ask me to give you head?! Absolutely not, because Gyoro and Ururun are not spares; they are friends, not food! Why do you need us, anyway? Why, I'm sure you have plenty of head of your own stored in those...barrels back there...
Oh my goodness! Could this be? I'd recognize those anywhere! Those barrels are specially handcrafted from the wood of the badtouch tree from the infamous lands of Sovyetrucia, each gently aged and mellowed by the surrounding essence of the undead into a perfectly-shaped body! Ehehehe, what a joy to caress these lovely subtle curves! Yes, the rumors are true after all: the barrels of Sovyetrucia are of such exceptional quality that it seems they can reach out and touch you! Oh, yes, magnificent wood, fondle me there~. ♥ Ahhh~ feel that silky-smooth quality, smell that hint of zombies, always present to mark the authenticity of any barrel from this region--wait, what am I saying?! Undead! Zombies! You're all zombies, aren't you? Why didn't I realize it sooner! I don't want to die here, surrounded by rotting swamp denizens, all alone and wanted only for my brains! At least you want me for something, but...oh, why am I so unlucky!? I don't--ack--
Hmph. Pathetically weak monsters such as you presume to be able to consume us? Do you want to die here, pitiful creatures? Remove any trace of yourselves and your ligaments from this place, and your little wooden pets, too! Our host may not realize they are a trap, but we are not fooled for a second. Flee for what passes as your lives, little demons, and heed that curious burning feeling known as fear. Yes, flee before we incinerate you in our wrath!
--Huh? Where am I? Where did everybody go? Did they have their good time without me and then just leave me all alone here to be miserable? They did, didn't they? Aaaahhh! I've been used!
Poll Vote!
Character name: Mello
Series: Death Note
Age: 21
Canon: [Spoiler warning!] Death Note begins as the battle of wits between the infamous Kira, a killer who can murder just by knowing a person's name and face, and the genius detective, L. When L is defeated, the task of bringing Kira to justice falls upon his two most promising heirs, Mello and Near. Mello, a chocolate-loving blond with a penchant for leather and religious motifs, is the elder of the two--although he always finds himself ranked second.
Mello's most defining trait is his desire to be the best. He knows he's a genius, and won't hesitate to insult someone of lesser intelligence. But growing up always second to Near has given him an inferiority complex more than capable of rivaling his ego. Unlike his rival, he allows his emotions to get the better of him at times, causing him to act rashly. He'll do anything and go to any length to outdo Near, even resorting to kidnapping and joining the mafia to further his goals. Such action is what eventually leads to his death, but also to the ultimate defeat of Kira.
Sample Entry:
A murder that occurred years ago with one victim and hundreds of suspects. And instead of narrowing it down, that number looks like it's been increasing as time goes on. I wonder if it's fun for the people in charge to keep bringing new players into this little game of theirs. Because to me, it sounds like they've been grasping at straws for much too long now. Hopeless.
By which I'm referring to whoever is running this pathetic excuse of an investigation. The situation is something I intend to take on, and there's nothing I take on that I definitely won't solve. I'm going to be the best, and where so many others have failed, I am going to prove victorious. I'm not letting anything stop me from catching the murderer first! Not that there's any competition. It's pretty embarrassing to hear how many detectives this place has stumped already, so I'm going to do the profession a favor by finishing this. There are more than enough dead around here too persistent to stay down. It's time someone puts Stephan Debussey to rest, don't you agree?
Though I'm currently at a disadvantage as far as resources...dammit! I suppose if I am going to have to end up enlisting some help, those zombies are my best choice. They're a little...a lot lacking in the intelligence department, but that's why I would be running the show. It's actually pretty lucky for me that there are people with their unique tastes to be found in such an isolated location; I only need to worry about them trying to eat me and not my chocolate. Handling death threats on myself is no problem, but I can't take additional risks when my Hershey's supply is this low. And while I'm thinking about that, I'll have to get in touch with the owner of this infamous white van. Whoever he is, somehow he manages to keep the thing stocked with a constant supply of candy, even with this place's isolated conditions. I need him working for me.
Well, now that I have a plan put in to place, I need to get to work. I'll have to keep myself under the radar until I've establish--ow! Who just dropped--? What the hell was that? A shotgun and laptop....
So. Is this their way of saying they knew I was going to come here all along? Finding me this quickly, they must have been monitoring my movements since I got here, watching and listening...
Well can you hear me now!? I refuse to let you treat me like some kind of criminal! Understand this, I'm not backing down. If you want to act as if I'm some sort of suspect then fine. Just don't get in the way of my work.
You can play around all you want, but I'm giving this business the serious treatment it deserves.
Poll Vote!
Character: Inoue Orihime
Series: Bleach
Character Age: 15
Canon: Bleach is the perfect shounen manga - Kurosaki Ichigo, who can see ghosts, fights with his friends and a very big sword against all manner of dead guys, developing amazing spiritual powers, and saving two or three planes of existence in the process. It's a manly story, full of blood and glory and testosterone and manliness!
And then, there's Inoue Orihime.
A beacon of silliness and light-heartedness in a vast ocean of epic battles and power-ups, Orihime is the cast's resident big-boobied ditz. With an imagination fueled by equal parts crack and Pixie Stix, and a shining smile for her friends, she helps Ichigo and Co fight the good fight with her magical hairpins. Yes. Magical hairpins. But just because she's a bit air-headed doesn't mean she's a dummy; in fact, she can be quite clever and perceptive (in her own way) and ranks third in her class. Some of her more interesting exploits have included imagining herself as a futuristic, super-destructive robot, mugging a couple of Shinigami for their clothes, and getting a piggy-back ride from Soul Society's version of Chuck Norris. Really, there's nothing Orihime can't do!
Scratch the surface, though, and you'll find Orihime is more than just another pretty face. She cares deeply for her friends, often hiding insecurity or pain behind a charming smile to keep them from worrying. In order to protect them, she even goes so far as to allow herself to be kidnapped by the bad guys, without a hope of a rescue. Not that she would admit to any of that; she's usually just happy to feed her friends peanut butter and fish milkshakes and be done with it.
Sample Post:
Battling her way through the harsh undergrowth, braving snakes and toucans and porcupines, intrepid explorer Inoue Orihime is... completely lost.
Well, okay, maybe not completely! I can tell by the angle of the sun and the moss growing on that creepy, moving vine over there that north is that way! So that means... there's swamp to my north! And... to my east! And, umm... pretty much everywhere except for south-southwest, where there's a glowing lake, actually. I wonder how they got it to glow like that? Maybe special lights, or the stuff they put in glow sticks, or glow-in-the-dark powdered drink mix?
Oh! And here's one of the locals now! Maybe you know why the lake glows, Miss umm... Miss Gorilla! And may I just say, that's a lovely shade of purple on you? You must have a very talented fur-dresser! Oh, how cute! You can even make a heart with your fingers! No, wait...
I've got it! That's exactly it, isn't it, Miss Gorilla! You need me, Inoue Orihime, Matchmaker Extraordinaire, to help with your love life! It must have been that charming zombie gentleman I saw back in the swamp, with the top hat and the monocle! Even though you're different species and at different stages of decomposition, it had to have been love at first sight! You saw his glazed and slightly moldy eyes, and your heart skipped a beat in your chest, and you knew -- you just knew -- that you were the one he'd spend the rest of his afterlife with!
All right! No longer hopelessly lost in the swamp, I now have a mission to see this ape and that zombie realize the fruits of their love! There's so much to do! I have to make you a new dress for a night out on the swamp! I can even make sure it doesn't clash with your pretty purple fur! And if you want, I can cook my famous lima bean and jelly casserole for your romantic dinner! And for atmosphere, well, I can't really play the accordion like in those Italian restaurants, but I've been told I play a mean kazoo!
You must be really excited, with the way you're jumping up and down and calling all your gorilla girlfriends over! Don't worry about me, though -- you don't have to pick me up and put me over your shoulder. I can walk! Umm... Miss Gorilla?
We're not going to see your fur-dresser, are we?
Poll Vote!