(no subject)
FIRST ROUND! As usual, you have until 6am EST to send in your applications.
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me if I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now VOTE. Closed!
Character: Felli Loss
Series: Chrome Shelled Regios
Character Age: 17
Canon: Chrome Shelled Regios takes place in a barren wasteland, poisoned by pollutants that make it inhospitable to most forms of life. The few survivors live in large, domed cities that roam the world and try to avoid trouble, which tends to come in the form of huge, buglike Filth Monsters. If an encounter does occur, the only line of defense are a city's Military Artists, people trained in the use of their spiritual power. Most of them are fighters, but when you're faced with hordes of enemies more than twice your size, some backup is always nice--and that's where the psychokinesists like Felli come in. The sparkly human equivalent of a combination computer and switchboard, psychokinesists use their telepathic and telekinetic abilities to observe and analyze the world around them, and relay this information to other people while keeping them in contact with each other.
The downside is that because most psychokinesists are too used to internally processing their constant influx of information, they're really, really bad at dealing with and showing their emotions. As a result, Felli's default expression is serious. She's quiet, clinical and blunt, getting right to the point with the occasional dry or cutting remark, all without batting an eye or changing her tone. This is true even when her somewhat unique perspective on the world shows itself, allowing her to say some ridiculous things (like asking someone if she can call them "Lay the flash") with a perfectly straight face. A private person, she's been getting a little better about showing some things when she's by herself or with those she's close to. But when she can't control her anger and frustration anymore, she still tends to release it explosively on inanimate objects, either with powerful kicks or impressive strings of obscenities. Once that's done, in the next instant she'll be back to her usual deadpan self.
Note: When venting, she actually says "*bleep*" instead of swearing. She also dislikes her older brother, the manipulative school president/boss of their city, Zuellni.
Sample Post:
Why . . . am I here. There are no swamps in Zuellni, therefore that cannot be where I am. Is this another of my brother's ideas? Transporting teams to a dangerous swamp without their knowledge and then making them train together to promote cooperation . . . that's something my brother would do. Bastard. . . . no, if that's true, where's everyone else? I can't sense any of my platoon members in the area. Does that mean this really isn't Zuellni? That's ridiculous, where else could it be. But all the information indicates that it isn't. If that's the case, where am I? . . . this is annoying. I don't want to be lost. How annoying...annoying...annoying! I hate being lost! When I find who did this, I'll *bleep* him and *bleep* him and then *bleep* *bleep* him! And then I'll *bleep* *bleep *bleep* his *bleep* with a *bleep*!
...there. Preliminary scan complete. Presently, the city is approximately 6.2 kilometers in diameter. However, its size is constantly changing, along with the overhead dome made of an unidentified but hard material. Despite the similarities in appearance, it does not seem to be a normal roaming city. They're of an unknown source and type, but the radiation levels I've measured inside are over nine thousand times greater than any others I've encountered. I don't understand. Why would someone want to keep the pollutants trapped with the people? The environment does not pose an immediate threat to life, but there appear to be many long-term side effects. The plant life has mutated and developed a primitive form of sentience. Some of them have also imitated the life form in the lake, as their probing limbs share a 52% similarity in basic structure and function.
However, while the mutations have allowed the plant life to advance, the primary human population has regressed. I can detect no life signs, but they must be alive, since some of them are still capable of basic motor functions. Their preoccupation with other people's brains may be because they emit no brainwaves of their own. In other words, overcompensation. . . . movement detected at two o'clock. One male human is approaching from the rear at 0.5 kilometers per hour. He may be coming slowly, but he is coming.
Hello. Do you need something? ...you want my help? Why? Ah, it's a relationship problem? I see, the person you like rejected your present so you want advice. But it's useless. My scan tells me you two are incompatible. You may have the same stagnant bloodtype now, but they're still clashing shades of green. Also, you're in different stages of decomposition. At this rate, when she's losing ears, you'll already be down to your last leg. But if you still want to try...a finger is no good as a present. Most people give flowers, but that isn't a good idea here. They could bite her nose off. You should give her something meaningful, like your heart. Or your teeth, so when hers fall out, she can use yours instead. That way, whenever she tries to chew on someone else, she'll be reminded of you. Furthermore, part of you will always be with her. That's romantic, isn't it?
Poll Vote!
Character Name: Nekoi Yuzuriha
Series: X
Character age: 14
Canon: It's time to party like it's 1999! Which it is, and by party we mean to duel it out for the fate of the world while feathers, sakura, and gears float stylishly in the background. The star of X is Kamui, a boy destined to either help save humanity or destroy it in favor of saving the Earth. His ultimate choice? To save present life and humanity as we know it for the sake of his childhood friends. Too bad that one of them, Fuuma, was destined to oppose whatever he chose and so transforms from a kind and gentle person into a sister-killing, city-destroying, UST-oozing wish-master.
Kamui and Fuuma each head a 6-person team of supernaturally-blessed people called the Dragons of Heaven and the Dragons of Earth respectively. Nekoi Yuzuriha of the Mitsumine Shrine is the youngest of these Dragons of Heaven and arguably the most cheerful. Her energetic and friendly demeanor can easily diffuse a tense and heavy atmosphere. Always by her side is Inuki, a dog-spirit which normal people cannot see, who can also transform into a sword. Yuzuriha can kick butt and fight with the best of them, but more than that she has a sincere wish to protect people. Despite not having an easy childhood among peers due to keeping an "invisible friend", she can still focus on being a mostly-normal teenager and making new friends - hopefully ones that can also see her best friend, Inuki.
Sample app:
A picnic out in the woods! What a wonderful idea, Zombie-san! Ah, I know I really shouldn't since I have someone else who's very important to me, but your poem about your heart stopping when we met and the feelings crawling to escape from beneath your skin, and the pain of rejection being a wound that will never heal... It was just so cool~! I thought, maybe, just sharing lunch would be all right. Don't you think so, too, Inuki? Zombie-san, did you know? I vowed to never date anyone who couldn't see Inuki, but I'm glad you can! So thank you for inviting us!
When I first got here I didn't think there would be anyone. There aren't many places like this in Japan but we're not in Japan, are we? There are so many strange trees and plants and animals, and they've been so kind just like you! A friend told me that everything in the world has a voice, even the plants, but this was the first time I've actually heard them! Ah, when Vine-san tried to shake my hand, he must have underestimated his grip because it was so tight!! And then I heard his voice, well, I think it was his voice - it was certainly a voice - and coming from somewhere nearby asking if I was lost, which I was. He wanted to show me the way to "Ei-Yu." He said it was a special place where even plants and people can get closer. True I didn't know where Ei-Yu was and while you should go to places you haven't gone before, Vine-san went too boldly. Thank goodness Inuki was there or else that might have been awkward!
Oh, Zombie-san, is it time to eat? Wow, amazing!! Is it called copy pasta because it's a recipe passed down from your mother and your mother's mother and so on? This is quite delicious sauce too, the perfect compliment. There are invisible sandwiches for Inuki, even! They're so light and airy, I've never had anything like them and -- uh-oh, I think Vine-san's back to say hello...! Ah, this might be embarrassing, I'm so, so sorry Zombie-san. Unless... maybe you two are friends? I guess he must be if he's greeting you like that. Such a big hug~! It looks like plants and people really can be close, too. I feel bad about eating and running but since you're wrapped up at the moment I'll just leave the both of you alone, 'kay? I'll see you later!
This was great, wasn't it, Inuki? Lunch was lots of fun, and who knew that Zombie-san had so many friends? He was super nice, and no one has ever told me they wanted me for my mind before!
Poll Vote!
Character: Presea Combatir
Series: Tales of Symphonia/Tales of Symphonia: Dawn of the New World
Character Age: 30, but is physically 14.
Canon: Spoiler goggles please! In Tales of Symphonia, the Chosen One Colette must go forth on a journey. Her quest? To receive the power of the heavens and restore the dying world of Sylvarant. The obstacles? Battles at every turn, gems called Exspheres that turn people into monsters and suppress their souls, rival factions bent on killing the Chosen ... and finding out that Sylvarant isn't the only world to worry about. Colette's group ends up wanting to save the second world, Tethe'alla, as well. To do so, they must destroy the existing system, which ensures that one world's prosperity means the other world's decline.
In Tethe'alla, they meet Presea, a strange girl who can't properly process emotions or the world around her. Her emotions, memories and physical growth are blocked by an Exsphere, which also enhances her physical strength so she can wield a gigantic axe with ease. When she's restored to normal, Presea remains confused by feelings and how to display them, although by the second game she no longer needs to introspectively analyze each one. She's usually solemn and completely deadpan, throwing out occasional dictionary definitions or percentages in robotic fashion. However, she also has her endearing/slightly terrifying moments, such as an obsession with giving animals strange nicknames, poking their paw pads, expressing herself with strange Pokemonesque noises, and bluffing her way past guards by threatening them with supernatural curses...even though it isn't necessary. Presea comes off as a calm, mature kid with a completely eccentric sense of humor?though no one can tell if she's ever really joking.
Note: Presea runs a business in Dawn of the New World, in conjunction with the Lezareno Company, as a developer of bizarre weapons, armor and lucky charms.
Sample Post:
Here. I have a delivery from Lezareno Mystic Supply for you, Mister Mostly Harmless of Camp Fiddle You Dee. I apologize for my lateness: I was distracted for a very long time. Some cats crossed my path in the forest, you see, and I had to stop and pet them first before coming here.
Your forest is very fine, Mister Harmless. Your cats are fine too. However, the zombie cat is not. It doesn't go poke, poke, poke like the regular cats. Instead, it goes poke, poke, poke, poik, poik, squish. I told it that its paw pads should not feel like that. They shouldn't be going poik, poik, squish, poik, poik, squish.
But then it ran away, and I hope it comes back soon. I don't really mind if it's a zombie at all. It can be my Squishy.
...you might not like my explanation, Mister Harmless, but that doesn't mean you have to try and throttle me because of it. Please, brains were not included in your package in any form, and I do not sell them as a product yet. I am warning you. Desist now, or I will have to use violence in turn...
Ah. There. I'm sorry you have to be Mister Armless now, too. Don't worry. It's still a nice name.
Please accept one of my newest charm prototypes along with your product, to make up for my lateness and your limbs. Yes, it is a gorilla with a tentacle in its mouth. I was inspired by what I saw in this forest, you see. I call it the Absolute Invasion-Deterring Statuette, or AIDS for short. It's supposed to prevent what it shows.
It's still untested, of course, but it should have a minimum sixty-nine percent success rate, since it is a first model. I hope that for you, it is a ninety-six or higher instead. If for any reason, you find yourself in the gorilla's position within the next seven-seven-seven days, Mister Armless, I will also be happy to offer you a none-defective replacement, free of charge.
I must go and make my next delivery now. Please...enjoy your AIDS.
Poll Vote!
Character: Kaidou Naoya
Series: Kamen Rider 555 (Faiz)
Character Age: ~21
Canon: Kamen Rider 555 follows Inui Takumi and Sonoda Mari as the two work against the mysterious corporation Smart Brain and fight against monsters/evolved humans known as Orphnochs (who are generally humans in appearance until it's RUBBER SUIT FIGHTIN' TIME). The primary goal of the Orphnochs is to further their race by attacking humans and dissolving their hearts. Sometimes, they convert! But most of the time, they just die. As Kamen Rider Faiz, Takumi fights against the Orphnochs, convinced that most of them have lost their human souls. However, there are a few Orphnochs in the series who do manage to hang onto their humanity even after being converted, such as Kaidou Naoya.
Kaidou is the sort that would hands-down win the award for most whimsical and eccentric character in the entire series. He's a fast-talking, easily distracted sort of guy. "Unpredictable" is a good word for him; "idiot" might be another. His speech reflects this -- almost being lucid and wise at times before snapping back into the whimsical rants and ramblings, even occasionally repeating himself. Despite the fact that he is an Orphnoch, Kaidou retains his human soul and has been described at the sort that, for all his bravado, couldn't even hurt a fly. Before becoming an Orphnoch, he was an aspiring musician, but his dream was cut short by a sudden accident. While he may make some arguably bad decisions, Kaidou always errs on the side of moral good in the end and genuinely wants to protect humans. He's a good guy, really! Just . . . don't expect him to be the best confidant. Ever. Ever.
Sample Post:
Oi, oi, what're you trying to do, huh?! Stop screwing around like that. So your eyeball's falling out a little -- so what! Put it back in there, put it back. Do you get it now, kid? A guitar like this isn't something you can pick up so easily like that. And not because of that eye of yours-- put it back in there, I said! I'm not touching that! It's disgusting. Disgusting! Besides, it's falling out because you're staring too hard at that sheet music! Give it up! Who wrote this, anyway? ... Listen, kid. This Astley guy -- this guy is the worst. Don't be deceived! Always rolling with the rick, tricking people with those videos of his! That'll make your eyes fall out. Don't worry though, don't worry. I won't let him get to you. Heh! Aren't you grateful you have the great Kaidou-sama as your teacher?
So! To start with, your posture's all wrong! Where'd you learn that from, huh?! Just because you and your mom and your aunt and ... and you are creaky zombie things doesn't mean you can just slack off like that. Look, you're no good like that! Try this. Tilt your shoulder back like this and lift your hand up like this and-- hey! What do you think you're doing?! Don't drop the guitar like that! You're doing it wrong!! Especially if your whole arm is falling off with it! You could have broken it! ... the guitar, I mean. The guitar. At least your arm cushioned the blow.
Got it back on? Good. Because you're getting your great teacher's first assessment of your performance. The verdict is! ... that you suck. You really, really suck, you know, kid? Well, can't be helped! Can't be helped when you're missing something, I mean. And no, no kid, it's not "brrrains" -- I don't need something like that to be amazing! No, you have to be funky. Spirited! In the mood! ... but carefully, or else you'll fall apart again. It's okay, though. Your genius teacher has the solution for even that. Here, take this roll of duct tape. Take it! Now even your own body's weakness can't stand in the way of your true funkiness!
Good, good! You're getting it. I told you, didn't I? Less with the strict following, more with the feel and you get it. Now you can show the rest of your zombie corpse-y pals how it's done, huh? Am I right? Hey, kid, that wasn't a yes-like gesture there. Or was that a "no" as in "no, of course you're right, Kaidou-sensei"? Ha, you can't get anything past your teacher! Right then. "Break a leg," they say! Break a leg. ... Oi, kid, that's not how you do it. That was weak! Come back here and let your great teacher show you how to really break a leg.
Poll Vote!
Character: Sonoda Mari
Series: Kamen Rider 555
Character Age: 16
Canon: In an admirable effort to produce the closest thing to Darwin's worst nightmare, the next step in the evolution of humans in the world of Kamen Rider 555 is the Orphnochs. Some can fly, others have an enhanced sense of smell and there are those with two sets of legs, but the one thing they all have in common is their monster-like good looks. An Evil Organization™ by the name of Smart Brain is tracking down all these advanced humans and gently guiding them through the use of threats into attacking regular humans for fun, profit, and more Orphnochs. And they'd have gotten away with it, if it weren't for the former chief of Smart Brain sending henshin belts to three of his many adopted children.
Sonoda Mari is one of these children. Despite her age, Mari is fairly independent and has no desire to be a hero. Upon receiving the transforming belt, she sets out to Tokyo to give it back to her father. After she arrives in Tokyo, she starts working in a dry cleaning business, along with one of her friends, Keitaro. While Mari isn't an ill-spirited person in the least, she finds Keitaro's heroic dreams impractical and rather troublesome. She's also impatient and doesn't like people to waste her time. If they do, she'll loudly tell them how to shape up. It's tough love, really. Yet Mari isn't without good traits-she believes in the good of her friends, even when there's overwhelming proof to the contrary; this has occasionally backfired on her. She enjoys gossiping about boys and her dream is to be a beautician.
Sample Post:
Okay, that's it. I know I told Keitaro that I'd drive straight to the address and make the delivery, but I don't think I'm in Tokyo anymore. The English names were a big clue, but it was those orange signs with skulls and crossed bones all over the fences that definitely did it. I'd let it pass as long as the fences weren't torn down and rusting through. I know Keitaro wants to help everyone, but this is a bit too much! Who'd need their whites cleaned in here? If anything, they should stock on cargo patterns to hide from whoever's moaning like that. He couldn't pay me enough to do this. As it is, most people wouldn't think "free food and board" is a good salary.
I guess he'll get upset if I don't do it, so let's take a look at the address again. "Mr. and Mrs. Toucan, Treehouse of Terror #13, Camp Fuck You Die." See, I was right. With a last name like that, they can't be Japanese. Now, if I could only make out the shape of a treehouse in the moonlight, I could be done and home with enough time to take down those posters saying, "We deliver even to the gates of Hell in less than 3 hours, or your money back!" They're really not meant to be taken literally!
Oh, here it is! I'll just ring the doorbell and-hAHH! What are you doing hanging out here at this hour?! This is no time for baby toucans to be curling up all the way down on the ground. You could scare somebody! Somebody besides me! Look, look! I dropped the bags and now they're all dirty. That's your fault! No, don't give me the excuse that you fell from the nest and can't fly back. I've already wasted a lot of time and I'm not going to stay here for you. So, come on, spread your wings and I'll lift you up. Do it before I change my mind!
See, that's much better. Your parents are already coming out to welcome you back in. I've never met a family of birds before; seeing this though, I can tell they're good people too. -Oh, no! What are you doing, Mrs. Toucan? Don't peck and push so hard! Stop, you're hurting me! Why, why did you do it? Maybe I shouldn't have held your baby? Maybe you don't like the smell of mud? Whatever it is, you can talk like me! So that's why I know you can understand me. And that's why I still believe that inside, you're just like a human.
Fine. Even better than one, since you have psychic senses. Still, I don't think that because we're dry cleaners, I should learn about brainwashing. Thanks for the offer, but you don't have to teach me a lesson. I said, no . . . !
. . . Toucans, good. Humans, bad.
Poll Vote!
Character: Urataros
Series: Kamen Rider Den-O
Character Age: Unknown; possesses an 18/19-year-old.
Canon: Monsters from the future, called Imagin, are returning to the present, to go to the past, with intent of punching the timestream. If this confuses you, don't worry; you're not alone. Naturally, this must not happen, so the unluckiest doormat in the world, Nogami Ryoutarou, must transform into Kamen Rider Den-O to stop them. Unfortunately, his superheroics are hampered by the fact that he can't actually fight, so he has to get possessed by some of the aforementioned Imagin to fight for him. This would be a cause for worry, except that these Imagin have better things to do than punch the timestream.
One of the Imagin that possesses Ryoutarou is Urataros. This turtle-like Imagin would rather hit on girls than fight; he's also a lying fisherman who gives access to Den-O's Rod Form. He says that one lie is more interesting than a thousand truths, and his mastery of these lies lets him fool anyone he wants. Rather than fighting or fishing, he prefers to reel in the hearts of women. But not just women, his lies manipulate everyone around him to serve his needs, making him a rather self-centered person. The only exceptions to his self-centered behavior are Ryoutarou and the other plastic suit protagonists, who he alternates between being gay for and being a wise elder-brother figure to. He talks a lot, oftentimes describing his past actions in prose that, while not purple, hovers somewhere around mauve. He puts fishing metaphors into almost everything he says, summing up his personality entirely with his catchphrase: "Won't you let me string you along?"
Sample Post:
A single lie is more interesting than a thousand truths. While this is true, I suppose being on the receiving end of those lies isn't as much fun. It's a rare thing, seeing as I'm quite skilled in the area of fishing for what I want. And one of the things I wanted was the girl confined to this lake. From what the toucans said, she's known to be quite a rare beauty. And as rare as they said she is, then I knew I had no choice but to find her. The lake seemed to be a good place to start... I thought, 'Beneath the glow there is a fish whose beauty is as blinding as the sun.' The toucans, too, agree with me and I still believe what they told me isn't a lie. However, from the looks of it, it seems that this is what they mean when they say the truth hurts.
But with such a rare and exotic name like Marcy, I knew she had to be something special. I was ready to use all of my skill to reel her in, but I was unprepared to deal with how literal it had become. Instead of reeling her in, I was the one being strung along. And it wasn't by a beautiful maiden, no; it was by some tentacled creature that seemed very attracted to my rod. I did my best to keep it out of her grasp, but she simply wouldn't take no for an answer. Normally I can't turn down a lady when she comes on to me, but this was a special case.
I managed to get away with my weapon intact, but I had unfortunately misunderstood the situation. I had believed that the tentacles merely belonged to some fish that was somehow holding the true Marcy below. The toucans helped confirm this by telling me so, and that's when I decided that I should go rescue her. After all, a beauty should never remain hidden in a lake; it would be such a waste. The toucans also agreed it needed to be done, though they kept insisting on calling me a 'hero in a half-shell'. Not even sure what that meant, I corrected their mistake, and went to find and free this maiden.
It was then that I realized the truth of this situation. More so it was Marcy's loving touches that soon brought it to my attention. Marcy disarmed me with surprising dexterity and skill, being very... thorough in her checking me for more armaments. Despite the rumors I've heard, the touching itself isn't 'bad', as much as it is restricting. However, it's very unsatisfying to be the one reeled in... So, Marcy, now that you know how it came to this, could you please put me back?
Poll Vote!
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me if I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now VOTE. Closed!
Character: Felli Loss
Series: Chrome Shelled Regios
Character Age: 17
Canon: Chrome Shelled Regios takes place in a barren wasteland, poisoned by pollutants that make it inhospitable to most forms of life. The few survivors live in large, domed cities that roam the world and try to avoid trouble, which tends to come in the form of huge, buglike Filth Monsters. If an encounter does occur, the only line of defense are a city's Military Artists, people trained in the use of their spiritual power. Most of them are fighters, but when you're faced with hordes of enemies more than twice your size, some backup is always nice--and that's where the psychokinesists like Felli come in. The sparkly human equivalent of a combination computer and switchboard, psychokinesists use their telepathic and telekinetic abilities to observe and analyze the world around them, and relay this information to other people while keeping them in contact with each other.
The downside is that because most psychokinesists are too used to internally processing their constant influx of information, they're really, really bad at dealing with and showing their emotions. As a result, Felli's default expression is serious. She's quiet, clinical and blunt, getting right to the point with the occasional dry or cutting remark, all without batting an eye or changing her tone. This is true even when her somewhat unique perspective on the world shows itself, allowing her to say some ridiculous things (like asking someone if she can call them "Lay the flash") with a perfectly straight face. A private person, she's been getting a little better about showing some things when she's by herself or with those she's close to. But when she can't control her anger and frustration anymore, she still tends to release it explosively on inanimate objects, either with powerful kicks or impressive strings of obscenities. Once that's done, in the next instant she'll be back to her usual deadpan self.
Note: When venting, she actually says "*bleep*" instead of swearing. She also dislikes her older brother, the manipulative school president/boss of their city, Zuellni.
Sample Post:
Why . . . am I here. There are no swamps in Zuellni, therefore that cannot be where I am. Is this another of my brother's ideas? Transporting teams to a dangerous swamp without their knowledge and then making them train together to promote cooperation . . . that's something my brother would do. Bastard. . . . no, if that's true, where's everyone else? I can't sense any of my platoon members in the area. Does that mean this really isn't Zuellni? That's ridiculous, where else could it be. But all the information indicates that it isn't. If that's the case, where am I? . . . this is annoying. I don't want to be lost. How annoying...annoying...annoying! I hate being lost! When I find who did this, I'll *bleep* him and *bleep* him and then *bleep* *bleep* him! And then I'll *bleep* *bleep *bleep* his *bleep* with a *bleep*!
...there. Preliminary scan complete. Presently, the city is approximately 6.2 kilometers in diameter. However, its size is constantly changing, along with the overhead dome made of an unidentified but hard material. Despite the similarities in appearance, it does not seem to be a normal roaming city. They're of an unknown source and type, but the radiation levels I've measured inside are over nine thousand times greater than any others I've encountered. I don't understand. Why would someone want to keep the pollutants trapped with the people? The environment does not pose an immediate threat to life, but there appear to be many long-term side effects. The plant life has mutated and developed a primitive form of sentience. Some of them have also imitated the life form in the lake, as their probing limbs share a 52% similarity in basic structure and function.
However, while the mutations have allowed the plant life to advance, the primary human population has regressed. I can detect no life signs, but they must be alive, since some of them are still capable of basic motor functions. Their preoccupation with other people's brains may be because they emit no brainwaves of their own. In other words, overcompensation. . . . movement detected at two o'clock. One male human is approaching from the rear at 0.5 kilometers per hour. He may be coming slowly, but he is coming.
Hello. Do you need something? ...you want my help? Why? Ah, it's a relationship problem? I see, the person you like rejected your present so you want advice. But it's useless. My scan tells me you two are incompatible. You may have the same stagnant bloodtype now, but they're still clashing shades of green. Also, you're in different stages of decomposition. At this rate, when she's losing ears, you'll already be down to your last leg. But if you still want to try...a finger is no good as a present. Most people give flowers, but that isn't a good idea here. They could bite her nose off. You should give her something meaningful, like your heart. Or your teeth, so when hers fall out, she can use yours instead. That way, whenever she tries to chew on someone else, she'll be reminded of you. Furthermore, part of you will always be with her. That's romantic, isn't it?
Poll Vote!
Character Name: Nekoi Yuzuriha
Series: X
Character age: 14
Canon: It's time to party like it's 1999! Which it is, and by party we mean to duel it out for the fate of the world while feathers, sakura, and gears float stylishly in the background. The star of X is Kamui, a boy destined to either help save humanity or destroy it in favor of saving the Earth. His ultimate choice? To save present life and humanity as we know it for the sake of his childhood friends. Too bad that one of them, Fuuma, was destined to oppose whatever he chose and so transforms from a kind and gentle person into a sister-killing, city-destroying, UST-oozing wish-master.
Kamui and Fuuma each head a 6-person team of supernaturally-blessed people called the Dragons of Heaven and the Dragons of Earth respectively. Nekoi Yuzuriha of the Mitsumine Shrine is the youngest of these Dragons of Heaven and arguably the most cheerful. Her energetic and friendly demeanor can easily diffuse a tense and heavy atmosphere. Always by her side is Inuki, a dog-spirit which normal people cannot see, who can also transform into a sword. Yuzuriha can kick butt and fight with the best of them, but more than that she has a sincere wish to protect people. Despite not having an easy childhood among peers due to keeping an "invisible friend", she can still focus on being a mostly-normal teenager and making new friends - hopefully ones that can also see her best friend, Inuki.
Sample app:
A picnic out in the woods! What a wonderful idea, Zombie-san! Ah, I know I really shouldn't since I have someone else who's very important to me, but your poem about your heart stopping when we met and the feelings crawling to escape from beneath your skin, and the pain of rejection being a wound that will never heal... It was just so cool~! I thought, maybe, just sharing lunch would be all right. Don't you think so, too, Inuki? Zombie-san, did you know? I vowed to never date anyone who couldn't see Inuki, but I'm glad you can! So thank you for inviting us!
When I first got here I didn't think there would be anyone. There aren't many places like this in Japan but we're not in Japan, are we? There are so many strange trees and plants and animals, and they've been so kind just like you! A friend told me that everything in the world has a voice, even the plants, but this was the first time I've actually heard them! Ah, when Vine-san tried to shake my hand, he must have underestimated his grip because it was so tight!! And then I heard his voice, well, I think it was his voice - it was certainly a voice - and coming from somewhere nearby asking if I was lost, which I was. He wanted to show me the way to "Ei-Yu." He said it was a special place where even plants and people can get closer. True I didn't know where Ei-Yu was and while you should go to places you haven't gone before, Vine-san went too boldly. Thank goodness Inuki was there or else that might have been awkward!
Oh, Zombie-san, is it time to eat? Wow, amazing!! Is it called copy pasta because it's a recipe passed down from your mother and your mother's mother and so on? This is quite delicious sauce too, the perfect compliment. There are invisible sandwiches for Inuki, even! They're so light and airy, I've never had anything like them and -- uh-oh, I think Vine-san's back to say hello...! Ah, this might be embarrassing, I'm so, so sorry Zombie-san. Unless... maybe you two are friends? I guess he must be if he's greeting you like that. Such a big hug~! It looks like plants and people really can be close, too. I feel bad about eating and running but since you're wrapped up at the moment I'll just leave the both of you alone, 'kay? I'll see you later!
This was great, wasn't it, Inuki? Lunch was lots of fun, and who knew that Zombie-san had so many friends? He was super nice, and no one has ever told me they wanted me for my mind before!
Poll Vote!
Character: Presea Combatir
Series: Tales of Symphonia/Tales of Symphonia: Dawn of the New World
Character Age: 30, but is physically 14.
Canon: Spoiler goggles please! In Tales of Symphonia, the Chosen One Colette must go forth on a journey. Her quest? To receive the power of the heavens and restore the dying world of Sylvarant. The obstacles? Battles at every turn, gems called Exspheres that turn people into monsters and suppress their souls, rival factions bent on killing the Chosen ... and finding out that Sylvarant isn't the only world to worry about. Colette's group ends up wanting to save the second world, Tethe'alla, as well. To do so, they must destroy the existing system, which ensures that one world's prosperity means the other world's decline.
In Tethe'alla, they meet Presea, a strange girl who can't properly process emotions or the world around her. Her emotions, memories and physical growth are blocked by an Exsphere, which also enhances her physical strength so she can wield a gigantic axe with ease. When she's restored to normal, Presea remains confused by feelings and how to display them, although by the second game she no longer needs to introspectively analyze each one. She's usually solemn and completely deadpan, throwing out occasional dictionary definitions or percentages in robotic fashion. However, she also has her endearing/slightly terrifying moments, such as an obsession with giving animals strange nicknames, poking their paw pads, expressing herself with strange Pokemonesque noises, and bluffing her way past guards by threatening them with supernatural curses...even though it isn't necessary. Presea comes off as a calm, mature kid with a completely eccentric sense of humor?though no one can tell if she's ever really joking.
Note: Presea runs a business in Dawn of the New World, in conjunction with the Lezareno Company, as a developer of bizarre weapons, armor and lucky charms.
Sample Post:
Here. I have a delivery from Lezareno Mystic Supply for you, Mister Mostly Harmless of Camp Fiddle You Dee. I apologize for my lateness: I was distracted for a very long time. Some cats crossed my path in the forest, you see, and I had to stop and pet them first before coming here.
Your forest is very fine, Mister Harmless. Your cats are fine too. However, the zombie cat is not. It doesn't go poke, poke, poke like the regular cats. Instead, it goes poke, poke, poke, poik, poik, squish. I told it that its paw pads should not feel like that. They shouldn't be going poik, poik, squish, poik, poik, squish.
But then it ran away, and I hope it comes back soon. I don't really mind if it's a zombie at all. It can be my Squishy.
...you might not like my explanation, Mister Harmless, but that doesn't mean you have to try and throttle me because of it. Please, brains were not included in your package in any form, and I do not sell them as a product yet. I am warning you. Desist now, or I will have to use violence in turn...
Ah. There. I'm sorry you have to be Mister Armless now, too. Don't worry. It's still a nice name.
Please accept one of my newest charm prototypes along with your product, to make up for my lateness and your limbs. Yes, it is a gorilla with a tentacle in its mouth. I was inspired by what I saw in this forest, you see. I call it the Absolute Invasion-Deterring Statuette, or AIDS for short. It's supposed to prevent what it shows.
It's still untested, of course, but it should have a minimum sixty-nine percent success rate, since it is a first model. I hope that for you, it is a ninety-six or higher instead. If for any reason, you find yourself in the gorilla's position within the next seven-seven-seven days, Mister Armless, I will also be happy to offer you a none-defective replacement, free of charge.
I must go and make my next delivery now. Please...enjoy your AIDS.
Poll Vote!
Character: Kaidou Naoya
Series: Kamen Rider 555 (Faiz)
Character Age: ~21
Canon: Kamen Rider 555 follows Inui Takumi and Sonoda Mari as the two work against the mysterious corporation Smart Brain and fight against monsters/evolved humans known as Orphnochs (who are generally humans in appearance until it's RUBBER SUIT FIGHTIN' TIME). The primary goal of the Orphnochs is to further their race by attacking humans and dissolving their hearts. Sometimes, they convert! But most of the time, they just die. As Kamen Rider Faiz, Takumi fights against the Orphnochs, convinced that most of them have lost their human souls. However, there are a few Orphnochs in the series who do manage to hang onto their humanity even after being converted, such as Kaidou Naoya.
Kaidou is the sort that would hands-down win the award for most whimsical and eccentric character in the entire series. He's a fast-talking, easily distracted sort of guy. "Unpredictable" is a good word for him; "idiot" might be another. His speech reflects this -- almost being lucid and wise at times before snapping back into the whimsical rants and ramblings, even occasionally repeating himself. Despite the fact that he is an Orphnoch, Kaidou retains his human soul and has been described at the sort that, for all his bravado, couldn't even hurt a fly. Before becoming an Orphnoch, he was an aspiring musician, but his dream was cut short by a sudden accident. While he may make some arguably bad decisions, Kaidou always errs on the side of moral good in the end and genuinely wants to protect humans. He's a good guy, really! Just . . . don't expect him to be the best confidant. Ever. Ever.
Sample Post:
Oi, oi, what're you trying to do, huh?! Stop screwing around like that. So your eyeball's falling out a little -- so what! Put it back in there, put it back. Do you get it now, kid? A guitar like this isn't something you can pick up so easily like that. And not because of that eye of yours-- put it back in there, I said! I'm not touching that! It's disgusting. Disgusting! Besides, it's falling out because you're staring too hard at that sheet music! Give it up! Who wrote this, anyway? ... Listen, kid. This Astley guy -- this guy is the worst. Don't be deceived! Always rolling with the rick, tricking people with those videos of his! That'll make your eyes fall out. Don't worry though, don't worry. I won't let him get to you. Heh! Aren't you grateful you have the great Kaidou-sama as your teacher?
So! To start with, your posture's all wrong! Where'd you learn that from, huh?! Just because you and your mom and your aunt and ... and you are creaky zombie things doesn't mean you can just slack off like that. Look, you're no good like that! Try this. Tilt your shoulder back like this and lift your hand up like this and-- hey! What do you think you're doing?! Don't drop the guitar like that! You're doing it wrong!! Especially if your whole arm is falling off with it! You could have broken it! ... the guitar, I mean. The guitar. At least your arm cushioned the blow.
Got it back on? Good. Because you're getting your great teacher's first assessment of your performance. The verdict is! ... that you suck. You really, really suck, you know, kid? Well, can't be helped! Can't be helped when you're missing something, I mean. And no, no kid, it's not "brrrains" -- I don't need something like that to be amazing! No, you have to be funky. Spirited! In the mood! ... but carefully, or else you'll fall apart again. It's okay, though. Your genius teacher has the solution for even that. Here, take this roll of duct tape. Take it! Now even your own body's weakness can't stand in the way of your true funkiness!
Good, good! You're getting it. I told you, didn't I? Less with the strict following, more with the feel and you get it. Now you can show the rest of your zombie corpse-y pals how it's done, huh? Am I right? Hey, kid, that wasn't a yes-like gesture there. Or was that a "no" as in "no, of course you're right, Kaidou-sensei"? Ha, you can't get anything past your teacher! Right then. "Break a leg," they say! Break a leg. ... Oi, kid, that's not how you do it. That was weak! Come back here and let your great teacher show you how to really break a leg.
Poll Vote!
Character: Sonoda Mari
Series: Kamen Rider 555
Character Age: 16
Canon: In an admirable effort to produce the closest thing to Darwin's worst nightmare, the next step in the evolution of humans in the world of Kamen Rider 555 is the Orphnochs. Some can fly, others have an enhanced sense of smell and there are those with two sets of legs, but the one thing they all have in common is their monster-like good looks. An Evil Organization™ by the name of Smart Brain is tracking down all these advanced humans and gently guiding them through the use of threats into attacking regular humans for fun, profit, and more Orphnochs. And they'd have gotten away with it, if it weren't for the former chief of Smart Brain sending henshin belts to three of his many adopted children.
Sonoda Mari is one of these children. Despite her age, Mari is fairly independent and has no desire to be a hero. Upon receiving the transforming belt, she sets out to Tokyo to give it back to her father. After she arrives in Tokyo, she starts working in a dry cleaning business, along with one of her friends, Keitaro. While Mari isn't an ill-spirited person in the least, she finds Keitaro's heroic dreams impractical and rather troublesome. She's also impatient and doesn't like people to waste her time. If they do, she'll loudly tell them how to shape up. It's tough love, really. Yet Mari isn't without good traits-she believes in the good of her friends, even when there's overwhelming proof to the contrary; this has occasionally backfired on her. She enjoys gossiping about boys and her dream is to be a beautician.
Sample Post:
Okay, that's it. I know I told Keitaro that I'd drive straight to the address and make the delivery, but I don't think I'm in Tokyo anymore. The English names were a big clue, but it was those orange signs with skulls and crossed bones all over the fences that definitely did it. I'd let it pass as long as the fences weren't torn down and rusting through. I know Keitaro wants to help everyone, but this is a bit too much! Who'd need their whites cleaned in here? If anything, they should stock on cargo patterns to hide from whoever's moaning like that. He couldn't pay me enough to do this. As it is, most people wouldn't think "free food and board" is a good salary.
I guess he'll get upset if I don't do it, so let's take a look at the address again. "Mr. and Mrs. Toucan, Treehouse of Terror #13, Camp Fuck You Die." See, I was right. With a last name like that, they can't be Japanese. Now, if I could only make out the shape of a treehouse in the moonlight, I could be done and home with enough time to take down those posters saying, "We deliver even to the gates of Hell in less than 3 hours, or your money back!" They're really not meant to be taken literally!
Oh, here it is! I'll just ring the doorbell and-hAHH! What are you doing hanging out here at this hour?! This is no time for baby toucans to be curling up all the way down on the ground. You could scare somebody! Somebody besides me! Look, look! I dropped the bags and now they're all dirty. That's your fault! No, don't give me the excuse that you fell from the nest and can't fly back. I've already wasted a lot of time and I'm not going to stay here for you. So, come on, spread your wings and I'll lift you up. Do it before I change my mind!
See, that's much better. Your parents are already coming out to welcome you back in. I've never met a family of birds before; seeing this though, I can tell they're good people too. -Oh, no! What are you doing, Mrs. Toucan? Don't peck and push so hard! Stop, you're hurting me! Why, why did you do it? Maybe I shouldn't have held your baby? Maybe you don't like the smell of mud? Whatever it is, you can talk like me! So that's why I know you can understand me. And that's why I still believe that inside, you're just like a human.
Fine. Even better than one, since you have psychic senses. Still, I don't think that because we're dry cleaners, I should learn about brainwashing. Thanks for the offer, but you don't have to teach me a lesson. I said, no . . . !
. . . Toucans, good. Humans, bad.
Poll Vote!
Character: Urataros
Series: Kamen Rider Den-O
Character Age: Unknown; possesses an 18/19-year-old.
Canon: Monsters from the future, called Imagin, are returning to the present, to go to the past, with intent of punching the timestream. If this confuses you, don't worry; you're not alone. Naturally, this must not happen, so the unluckiest doormat in the world, Nogami Ryoutarou, must transform into Kamen Rider Den-O to stop them. Unfortunately, his superheroics are hampered by the fact that he can't actually fight, so he has to get possessed by some of the aforementioned Imagin to fight for him. This would be a cause for worry, except that these Imagin have better things to do than punch the timestream.
One of the Imagin that possesses Ryoutarou is Urataros. This turtle-like Imagin would rather hit on girls than fight; he's also a lying fisherman who gives access to Den-O's Rod Form. He says that one lie is more interesting than a thousand truths, and his mastery of these lies lets him fool anyone he wants. Rather than fighting or fishing, he prefers to reel in the hearts of women. But not just women, his lies manipulate everyone around him to serve his needs, making him a rather self-centered person. The only exceptions to his self-centered behavior are Ryoutarou and the other plastic suit protagonists, who he alternates between being gay for and being a wise elder-brother figure to. He talks a lot, oftentimes describing his past actions in prose that, while not purple, hovers somewhere around mauve. He puts fishing metaphors into almost everything he says, summing up his personality entirely with his catchphrase: "Won't you let me string you along?"
Sample Post:
A single lie is more interesting than a thousand truths. While this is true, I suppose being on the receiving end of those lies isn't as much fun. It's a rare thing, seeing as I'm quite skilled in the area of fishing for what I want. And one of the things I wanted was the girl confined to this lake. From what the toucans said, she's known to be quite a rare beauty. And as rare as they said she is, then I knew I had no choice but to find her. The lake seemed to be a good place to start... I thought, 'Beneath the glow there is a fish whose beauty is as blinding as the sun.' The toucans, too, agree with me and I still believe what they told me isn't a lie. However, from the looks of it, it seems that this is what they mean when they say the truth hurts.
But with such a rare and exotic name like Marcy, I knew she had to be something special. I was ready to use all of my skill to reel her in, but I was unprepared to deal with how literal it had become. Instead of reeling her in, I was the one being strung along. And it wasn't by a beautiful maiden, no; it was by some tentacled creature that seemed very attracted to my rod. I did my best to keep it out of her grasp, but she simply wouldn't take no for an answer. Normally I can't turn down a lady when she comes on to me, but this was a special case.
I managed to get away with my weapon intact, but I had unfortunately misunderstood the situation. I had believed that the tentacles merely belonged to some fish that was somehow holding the true Marcy below. The toucans helped confirm this by telling me so, and that's when I decided that I should go rescue her. After all, a beauty should never remain hidden in a lake; it would be such a waste. The toucans also agreed it needed to be done, though they kept insisting on calling me a 'hero in a half-shell'. Not even sure what that meant, I corrected their mistake, and went to find and free this maiden.
It was then that I realized the truth of this situation. More so it was Marcy's loving touches that soon brought it to my attention. Marcy disarmed me with surprising dexterity and skill, being very... thorough in her checking me for more armaments. Despite the rumors I've heard, the touching itself isn't 'bad', as much as it is restricting. However, it's very unsatisfying to be the one reeled in... So, Marcy, now that you know how it came to this, could you please put me back?
Poll Vote!