(no subject)
THIRD ROUND, GOOD JOB WITH VOTING. Let's keep it up! :Dd
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me if I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now VOTE. Closed!
Character: Sam Winchester
Series: Supernatural
Character Age: 25
Counselor Job: Grief Counselor
Canon: Take any supernatural creature you’ve heard of (and quite a few you haven’t), throw in two brothers fighting them as a part of the family business, add in the Apocalypse and one of these brothers turning out to be the Antichrist, and you’ve got the amazing adventures of Dean and Sam Winchester. They do as much as they can to fight off the dark, scary, and evil creatures in the world.
Sam is the youngest of the duo, AKA the Antichrist in training who struggles with the monster he’s becoming. In tune with this, he was once the softer, dewy-eyed member of the pair, sympathetic and understanding one-pretty much your typical bleeding heart. But he’s since embraced the darker parts of being a hunter: shooting first, understanding who needs to die, and being more forceful when someone gets out of line. All his sympathetic notions aren’t gone, though-Sam wants to see the best in others while he still tries to see the best in himself, believing that there’s a potential gray area to all things. It doesn’t help, though, when he gets angry and struggles with his darker temperament, especially while bent on revenge that will help save a lot of people. But he tries, he really does. And can’t the Antichrist be a good guy in the end?
Sample Post:
This is going to sound a little strange, but hear me out: a little birdie told me you were here. Well, actually, it was a full-grown toucan. I know that’s the kind of thing people say to poke into your business, but I’m here to help. See, they brought me in as a specialist after a lot of bad things happened. And at the end of this, your fiancé, Stephan? Turned up dead. What you’re doing and what changes you’re experiencing are only understandable. You’ve closed yourself off, become so depressed that all you want to do is hurt several hundred possibly guilty people with a bunch of zombies in a summer camp. … Hey, how did you bring back so many zombies, Miss Sayre? There aren’t any gravestones around here or even a mausoleum-and from the description of Stephan Debussey, none of them look a thing like him. But I’m sure, with the two of us talking like this, you’ll help me understand.
You see, none of this was a good idea. I know the distress that comes from wanting to find who’s hurt you. You want revenge, and sometimes, it doesn’t even matter if the person you’re hurting is guilty. And the people you’ve got here? Maybe they aren’t helping their cases, even if they’re innocent. They avoid you all they can and they don’t come around to say “hello.” Have you thought that they might be a little afraid of the toxic pink surroundings? It might even just be that you’re not in the center of things, because there’s a strange draw there, weird vibes and a mojo I haven’t quite figured out, like it’s alive. Anyway … you’ve gotta see that these things aren’t signs of guilt. Torturing them, handcuffing them together, and trying to force the truth out of them? Isn’t gonna force a confession. I know you’re desperate. I’ve been there, alone after you’ve lost everyone you care about. You have to do anything you can to help the pain. Anything.
This all probably sounds a little like some kind of after school special for dealing with grief-or, umm, the opening chapter of those Chicken Soup for the Soul books. Not that I’ve read those myself. Still, I’m here to help you move past your grieving stage. You might not find the one responsible for Stephan’s death right away, or ever, but you should do something productive with this energy in a healthier outlet. Knitting or … what about surfing the internet? Hey, maybe you can check out a good singles’ chatroom and realize you aren’t so alone in the world. With time, and a few awkward private instant messages, you might be able to move on. Just remember not to use this as another outlet for your mission. That won’t help you.
You’re moving around down there, so I’ll take that as a sign that you like the sound of that. Once you move past your grief, I can get you out of there and change you back into who you really are. I’ve never heard of transformation resulting from sadness, but I’m prepared for anything in this line of work, and what you’ve been through was obviously pretty traumatic. I mean, not only have you turned into something out of Japanese lore, but you apparently think it would be easier if you started anew and had all the rest of the birds here call you Marcy. But if you ask me? With all that pink, you look more like a Britney.
Poll Vote!
Character Name: Mibu Oriya
Series: Yami no Matsuei
Age: Mid-thirties
Job: Liaison to the Villainously Inclined (and secretly the Manager of the Best Little Zombie Whorehouse in Louisiana)
Canon: Throw in some dead detectives, a bucketful of angst, a pedotastic rapist and murderer, more unresolved sexual tension than you can shake a stick at, and a healthy pinch of humor. Mix well and you'll end up with the basic formula for Yami no Matsuei. Tsuzuki Asato and his partner, Kurosaki Hisoka, are shinigami whose job is to investigate supernatural incidents and help souls pass on. Their job is frequently complicated by Muraki Kazutaka, who appears to be a kind doctor, but is actually a powerful magic user and a very disturbed individual. Muraki is obsessed with gaining control of Tsuzuki's body for his own nefarious purposes, and does some horrible things in order to attract Tsuzuki's attention.
Mibu Oriya enters the story as Muraki's mysterious best friend. Oriya manages the KouKakuRou, a traditional restaurant that is secretly a high-class brothel, frequented by the rich and powerful. Oriya himself defies expectation. He lives a traditional lifestyle, wearing flowery kimono and mastering the katana, but he does maintain important contacts in the government and beyond. Oriya is a polite and graceful host, but also has a volatile temper that is easy to set off. Oriya holds no illusions about what kind of man Muraki is, but is friends with him despite that. This is the kind of man who will hide the bodies for you, while also yelling about the fact that the murders have even taken place. Where else could a psycho killer find a friend who is loyal, brave, willing to speak his mind, and happy to beat some sense into him when he deserves it?
Sample Entry:
Good evening, Zombie-san, and welcome to the . . . Best Little Zombie Whorehouse in Louisiana. My apologies for the lack of discretion in the title; from what I've been able to learn, it's apparently traditional. What idiot calls a secret brothel a brothel? Ah, I recognize you now, Zombie-san. That left arm really wasn't doing your form any favors, and has your face melted since we last saw you? In any case, thank you for always being such a good patron. Please feel free to relax and allow me to take care of everything for you this evening. The zombie jamboree will begin in another hour, but to keep your appetites whetted until then, the cook has prepared a special feast: monkey brains in a nice cerebrospinal sauce and--
No, I'm sorry, but we won't be serving any “red rum†tonight. No matter how enjoyable an evening it might create for some of our patrons, the clean up afterwards is always extremely costly. And, if I may trouble my honored patron with a question? No, don't bother attempting to reply, because I plan to ask it anyway. Exactly how stupid do you think I am, Zombie-san?! Did you really think I wouldn't recognize such a well-known palindrome? Or have your brains dribbled so far out of your ears that thinking has become too difficult for you? I have better things to do with my time than play silly word games. You will not be murdering any of my rotting flowers tonight, with or without my consent! If you want that kind of sport, go find it elsewhere. This kind of establishment would be impossible to run without well-trained employees, which I won't have if I let just anyone arbitrarily kill them off! Isn't having sex with a zombie close enough to necrophilia, anyway?
Tch, you're still here? You don't take a hint, do you? While my official job is to liaise to the villainously inclined, which is a category you technically fall under, I don't have to roll out the red carpet! Just because you like murdering the undead and having your way with the bodies of your victims doesn't mean I have to cater to your whims. Do you even know what a liaison is? A liaison encourages communication and cooperation, which are two concepts that seem to be entirely lost on you. At least this one doesn't think I'm here to have a liaison with him. I wish I had a dictionary to throw your way; it would probably make a stronger impact on you than my words do. It's not like another dent in your head will hurt the aesthetic you're going for.
But since you still seem so unwilling to leave, Zombie-san, I guess I have no choice. I have a very special lady who has volunteered to take troublesome customers like you off my hands. Now please, enjoy Marcy-san's floating world tonight. I'm sure it will be an experience that you'll never forget.
Poll Vote!
Character: Kazutaka Muraki
Series: Yami no Matsuei (Descendants of Darkness)
Character Age: 34 (post Kyoto-arc)
Job: Pediatrician
Canon: Sometimes when people die and still have strong attachments to the world, they are given the choice to become shinigami-- reapers or "death gods." Yami no Matsuei centers around Tsuzuki and Hisoka, two shinigami who work as detectives. Their job is to investigate mysterious deaths and situations in which people stay alive past their time.
One cause of such situations is Kazutaka Muraki. A genius physician with a charming smile, a tendency to wear white, and angelic silver hair, at first glance he looks like anything but a bad guy. After all, Muraki spends his time helping poor sick girls and selflessly offering his aid to random fainting boys. He claims he became a doctor to help people, and that his own limitations frustrate him. Clearly, this is the kind of guy you'd entrust your health to. But despite his ability to give a very good first impression, Muraki is actually a crazy murdering rapist who has the ability to absorb people's life force. His ultimate goal is to get his half-brother Saki a perfect body so he can kill him properly. He's been working towards this objective for years--years during which he's kept Saki's head perfectly preserved. In a jar. In an underground lab. Yeah.
But he's totally a good doctor. Really.
Sample Post:
I must admit this place is unlike anything I have seen before. It is truly fascinating. Trite as it sounds, I can't help being impressed by such large quantities of undead. To be able to reanimate a human body once it has stopped functioning is something out of a Science Fiction novel... I do apologize if it sounds morbid, but something like this can't help but appeal to my inner scientist. If I learned how, exactly, the dead nerves are re-animated, it would be possible to revolutionize modern medicine. Crippling spine injuries, such as the one Madam Sayre almost inflicted upon me, could become a thing of the past. --it was an accident, I'm sure. A woman of her stature and finesse would never resort to such brutality on purpose. I am certain there would have been no further accidents, even if I had not agreed to become part of the staff.
Well, I am here. There seems to be little point in fighting it, so I might as well make the best of things. Good afternoon, everyone. I am Doctor Muraki Kazutaka. If I am not concussed and the toucan was indeed telepathic, I have been assigned here as your new pediatrician-- a doctor who tends to children, that is. Although my assignment is specifically to look after children and teenagers seventeen years old or younger, I am more than capable of tending to adults as well. I have plenty of experience and have seen to several... ah, uncommon patients over the years, so should the need arise, please do not hesitate to ask for my services. Trust me when I say your case won't be stranger than what I have encountered before.
As for the children, sadly, the records I have been provided with are dreadfully lacking. Although I am sure that astrological sign and cooking skills are relevant in other contexts, from a medical point of view they are hardly useful, so we will have to begin by having every camper under eighteen years of age visit the hospital as soon as possible. I will be performing full physicals with the purpose of updating the camp records. Loathe as I am to describe these appointments as 'mandatory,' especially so soon after my arrival... Well, considering the toxicity of the lake, the manners of the local fauna, and... reports of sudden onsets of temporary insanity. Yes, I do believe it is of utmost importance to make sure you are healthy.
Form a line, if you would. I have robes should you want one.
Poll Vote!
Character name: Claire Redfield
Series: Resident Evil
Age: 26
Job: Zombie Apocalypse Youth Counselor
Canon: Resident Evil is a survival horror series, set in a world full of conspiracy, cheesy b-movie dialogue, with zombies that leave you notes like "Itchy. Tasty.". The Umbrella Corporation is a powerful pharmaceutical company, with research facilities all over the world and it’s hands in many government pockets. Whole towns, including the small mid-western town of Raccoon City, practically belong to the company. Unknown to most, the company does dangerous viral experiments, bent on creating the ultimate bio-weapon. Unfortunately, their safety procedures seems to be somewhat lacking, if the numerous viral outbreaks are any sign. In the midst of the resulting mini-zombie apocalypses, ridiculously skilled unlikely protagonists are forced to fight their way out through hordes of the undead and Umbrella’s experimental bio-weapons.
One such survivor is Claire Redfield, younger sister of protagonist Chris Redfield. She was just an ordinary college student when she went to Raccoon City looking for her missing brother, and became trapped in the zombie-infested city. Barely escaping with her life, she devoted herself to working for an anti-biological terror organization known as Terra Save. Used to surviving by the skin of her teeth, Claire is an independent and resourceful woman with a cool head and an occasional sarcastic streak. She’s something of a tomboy, with a deep love of motorcycles and an impressive knowledge of firearms. Quick to speak her mind, and quicker to act on her feelings, she might come across as a stereotypical tough girl. Though more than capable of holding her own, she’s instead chosen to embrace her nurturing side, helping the victims of bio-terror (re: Zombie Apocalypse) incidents. If her brother is involved, or there’s a youngster in need, or someone in
danger, she won’t hesitate to literally travel the world or face down unimaginable horrors to save them.
Sample Entry:
Hi, everyone. My name is Claire Redfield, and your camp director asked me here to talk to you about an important topic. I’m here to teach you what to do if you ever find yourself in the middle of a Zombie Apocalypse. Now, I know that it’s a scary idea. It’s alright to be scared. But the more you know, the less frightening it will be. You should always know what to do in an emergency, right?
The first thing you should know is that zombies are kind of like strangers. And I’m sure your mom and your dad have taught you to never talk to strangers, right? It’s the same thing with zombies. You should never, ever try to talk to them or go anywhere near them. If you ever see a zombie coming your way, what do you do? First, don’t scream. Instead, run away and find help. Go find an adult you trust, like your mom or dad or a police man -- as long as they’re not zombies, too. And if you can’t find an adult, remember this important rule: Shoot them in the head.
To make sure you’re all ready, you each get a copy of this guide book. Remember to pay attention to what it tells you, because knowing is half the battle. I know if you’re prepared and you’re brave, not only will you be alright -- but your mom and dad will be really proud of you, too.
Now that you’ve had a chance to look it over, it’s time to see how ready you really are. Everyone has a piece of paper and a pencil, right? Good, now I’m going to give you some questions. Try to answer them as best you can, okay?
Poll
Okay, everyone pass your quizzes forward. Let’s see how ready you all are for the Zombie Apocalypse. If you all do well, I have a special treat for you.
......alright, who’s the joker that wrote “Itchy. Tasty.” on their quiz in ketchup?
Poll Vote!
Character: Vincent Nightlay
Series: Pandora Hearts
Age: 23. Ish.
Job: Camp Seamstress
Canon: On the night of his coming-of-age ceremony, Oz
Vesalius was unceremoniously chucked into the Abyss by some charming
folks in hoods and cloaks. Not his best day. While down there, he met
a girl called Alice, also known as the "chain" (monstrous pokemon who
make contracts with people) Bea Rabbit - and with her help, returned
to the world. Ten years after he left, which we'll agree is a long
time to dally about eating cookies. Having escaped from the Abyss, Oz
and Alice are greeted by the organisation Pandora - and, neither
helped or hindered by the representatives of said organisation, head
off to patch up the holes in Alice's memories.
Existing to monitor the Abyss, Pandora is made up of representatives
from the Four Great Duke Houses, one of which is the Nightlay House. A
few years before Oz was kicked into the Abyss, they adopted a boy
named Vincent Nightlay, who grew up to be an exceptionally
pleasant and well-bred young man. Prone to continual smiles and
falling asleep in unusual places (thanks to his chain, the Dormouse),
Vincent strives for a good first impression - yet despite this, and
the fact he is a pretty princess, Vincent nevertheless manages to give
everyone he meets the raving heebie jeebies. There's a good reason for
that - Vincent is an unstable individual who continually plots against
everyone he knows, to protect his secrets and further his ambitions,
with no exceptions. While there is someone he cares about - his
brother, Oz's servant Gilbert - it doesn't stop him from using Gil to
further his ends.
Sample Post:
Mm? Ah, it appears I must have dozed off. I apologise about your
spine, I can honestly say that I had no idea it would be so fragile. I
really am terribly sorry. I didn't intend to extend my arm
quite so far ... and it was only the slightest of pressure ...
but it was an accident, most certainly. It's fortunate for you, I
suppose, that you can just place your head back on so easily. If you
couldn't, I suppose being apologetic would be a waste of time, hm?
It's a curious talent you have - I've seen several unusual things of
late, but never someone who can reconstruct their spine purely by
vigorously pressing their skull back to their shoulders. That's
very interesting indeed.
It's unfortunate that I chose here to fall asleep ... not that there
are many better places, are there? I suppose it's best to make do with
what comes to hand. Ah, no, that wasn't an invitation to give me
yours. As I was about to say, this ... substance on my clothes won't
do at all -- I do hope, sir, that it isn't yours. Especially since my
arrival in this charming place was prompted by a letter I
received asking for my services, and it's never appropriate to arrive
so mussed upon the first day of a new post. Even if the job
isn't one I have accepted as of yet. Still, although this place isn't
precisely what I expected, it's still better to make the best of
things; while I was satisfied enough in my previous occupation, it
would be dull of me to be closed-minded to a new experience, would it
not? Yet, I feel there might have been some mistake about the position
... for one thing, a seamstress tends to be female; secondly, I have
no particular prowess in sewing. I've never been entirely interested
in putting things together.
Still, if the position as "seamstress" is one this place is going to
insist I take up, I must add that it seems your seams
are somewhat ... lacking in cohesion. I would say, in fact, that
they're downright shoddy, especially in the shoulder area - you look
rather more like a lab attendant for a mad scientist than the
dignified gentleman which I'm sure you are. Haha, if I were you I'd be
perfectly miserable ... even you should know full well that you choose
the colour of your thread to match the colour of the material. That
should be off-green, as far as this case is concerned. There's only
one thing to do for you, I'm afraid ♥ - we'll have to start
again. While it may be an utterly grotesque task, I suppose I'll make
an effort to assist you ... I do, after all, have a pair of scissors
right here.
Come, now. Off with your head.
Poll Vote!
Character name: Hibiki
Series: Kamen Rider Hibiki
Age: 31
Job: Provider of Direction(s)
Canon: Once upon a time, a boy went on a boat and found a man who was singing to the dolphins, and who also rescued a small child from falling overboard. How is that important? Well, the details really aren't. This was just the fated first meeting between Adachi Asumu and our title character, Kamen Rider Hibiki! Hibiki, who is actually an Oni, fights for the Takeshi group to defeat makamou, which are monsters that cause terror and wreak havoc and are generally bad. The Oni do this by using pure sound, whether it be by a guitar, a trumpet, or in Hibiki's case, a taiko drum.
Hibiki works for the Tachibana family, one of the divisions of the Takeshi group. Prone to breaking out in random little songs, Hibiki is calm, relaxed, and a bit eccentric, whether it be by the somewhat strange way he speaks, or because he's generally inept at some of the normal things in life, such as driving a car, or doing anything with your cellphone that isn't answering it. He doesn't take things overly seriously, except his training as an Oni, which he is pretty passionate about. After all, anyone can do anything if they just train hard enough - and Hibiki is no exception to that rule, making him quite an athletic guy, whether he be hiking, or swimming. He's one of the older Oni, and acts as an upperclassmen to the others, whether it be teasing them, or acting as a mentor and offering sage pieces of advice.
Sample Entry:
♫ Marcy, Marcy, in the lake, makes you do a double take, something that you can't mistake, whoa--! ... Oh, so, so, so this is Camp Fuck You Die! ♫
Hey, I hope everyone is working hard. I think Marcy-chan definitely is. Ah, I'm Hibiki.
I don't normally get jobs in America, but you know what they say: Wherever you go, there you are. So, here I am! You're here too, so I guess we were supposed to meet. I'm here for a couple of reasons, and neither of them are anything like what I thought I'd be here for, but that's alright. Besides, I don't ever think I've heard of a makamou with quite so many legs-- Oh, I shouldn't talk about that. Don't tell my boss, okay? Ehh, anyway, let's begin!
Directions, wasn't it? Alright! I can tell you where to go, if you want. Map or not, this place should be pretty easy to navigate. Over the river and through the swamp, to Camp Fuck You Die we go. Heh. I know most of you know where all the big attractions are - mess hall, arts and crafts hut, alright, alright. Everyone knows those, so I bet you won't mind showing me? I think I got the least useful map Miss Director could send me. Electronic! Can you imagine? It's been two years since the last update, though I don't know how you'd update this... thing. It looks like a lot has just popped out of nowhere since then. But it's nothing to worry about. This is just a guide, a suggestion! We'll figure it out. Once this thing stops beeping at me, anyway.
Giving direction is a bit different than giving directions though. Everyone can say what they'd like to be, what they'd like to do. It takes a lot of courage to realize what that is, and to realize that what you'd like to do is different from what you must do. Just think of the people who've been here the longest. Yeah, you know. I'm talking about the rotten men and women here, although it's not fair of me to judge them like that. I might be a bit biased, but they're just doing their thing, following the beat of their own hearts -- aah, bad choice of words there. --Hey, there's no need to grab anyone else's hearts, you two! ... But you know what I'm saying. If you've decided to follow someone, or take from their example, there's nothing wrong with that, but that person can only show you the destination. The way you make it there is completely up to you.
So I guess what I'm saying is, my direction, or my directions, may not be a whole lot of use to you boys and girls. But we shouldn't let something like "may not be" and "not able to" discourage us from trying. You can't make an omelet without breaking a few eggs, right? We just have to remember to keep away from the ones laid by the fire breathing ducks. We can make it a fun trip for everyone, with a little work, you know! Yeah, that's right - training, and hard work!
Alright, everyone! Let's get lost!
Poll Vote!
Character name: Sohma Ayame
Series: Fruits Basket
Age: 27
Job: Arts and Crafts Director
Canon: Once upon a time, God invited 13 animals to a grand banquet. A good time was had by all, the banquet would continue every year, and all the animals took their place in the Chinese Zodiac. All, that is, except for That Damn Cat, who by no fault of his own, stood God up. Fast forward to modern day Japan, the banquet's still going on, the animals are hanging out in the bodies of one very, very special family, and That Damn Cat STILL isn't showing up for food. And still by no fault of his own. Add in a jealous god, an adorable girl with a unique world view, and a curse that turns you into your spirit animal when hugged, you have the general gist of your romantic comedy known as Fruits Basket.
And what is a romantic comedy without a resident expert on ROMANCE!? Ayame is the Snake of the Zodiac, and quite a fabulous one if he does say so himself. He's loud, energetic and has a force of personality which may be generally likened to a category five hurricane. His life's calling is to help people navigate the treacherous roads of Romance by his tailoring skills and unfathomably complicated logic. And, of course, through his 'romantic cosplay' shop, where dreams are specially tailored! When it comes to family, you could not find a more devoted brother WHETHER HIS BROTHER WANTS HIM TO BE OR NOT! Of course, most of this is a reflection of a very deep, older regret, and the best way he knows how to keep moving forward on his life and his brother's forgiveness.
Like most Sohma cursed by an animal spirit of the Zodiac, Ayame has several traits shared with snakes in particular... cold and heat intolerance, in particular.
Sample Entry:
HA HA HA! America, at last! While this locale was not particularly what I was expecting when I had received such a courteous offer by the Lady Director of this establishment, I can certainly understand why it appears as it does. Obviously, this could have once been a fine place, filled with the many wonders of the world across the ocean! Sprawling cities in neon, trod by only the most fashionable and well matched ladies and gentlemen~ The glamor of Hollywood! The scandalous heart race of a night in Vegas! The beautiful expanses of Yellowstone! Air conditioning! But... in breathless anticipation of having such incomparable people as myself, it had simply folded in upon itself and left a swamp in shame.
I am certain that its inhospitality is an accidental gesture of humility, if most assuredly related to my own arrival... SO! I offer both my condolences and my services! Rest assured! This is no mere empty gesture! I would not do such after having singlehandedly caused such inconvenience! NO! I will take the vacated seat of much authority known as the Arts and Crafts Director!
While, at first, to the uneducated ear, it may seem as a somewhat less glorified and if those would be so brash as to say it, useless, position. I must simply draw attention to its many uses instead! Yes, with these skills I may impart to you, you should be able to take up your own seams! Color coordinate! Build elaborate yet fully functional mansion-like abodes entirely of popsicle sticks and a bit of creeper which could serve as a functional getaway for yourself and your significant other. Or if sturdy enough, simply a get away, depending on which disturbing creature is shambling along at an alarmingly fair clip.
A-HA! I sense doubt! There is no need to conceal it! I had expected such a dubious stare, however, I am more than willing to prove my ability to you. There is nothing which cannot be done if you truly put your heart into it with sufficient determination!
While this process may seem mystifying, the rewards, I am certain, are incomparable. First, lay out that construction paper, wide and flat! Now, one may safely use twigs or average popsicle sticks if one is to glue them securely enough. Now, lay and secure them in long rows along the paper, converging to a point nearest you. Just like that! After that, simply, and carefully, pick up our newest construct up and wave it in my direction. Vigorously!
EXCELLENT~ While not entirely up to my own craftsmanship, a fan really IS an unrivaled demonstration of genius in the summer... Well! Now that I have regained my own determination! About that house~
Poll Vote!
Character Name: Zolf J. Kimblee
Series: Fullmetal Alchemist (manga version)
Character Age: Early Thirties?
Job: Explosives Supervisor
Canon: Fullmetal Alchemist is the story of two brothers who set out to bring back their dead mother by committing a taboo in alchemy and end up nearly destroying themselves in the process. Having committed a grevious sin, these brothers are seeking to restore their bodies to normal by searching for the legendary Philosopher's Stone. Along their journey, the brothers get caught up in military affairs, sinister plots of genocide, and more than a few dangerous distractions. One "distraction" is the older brother, Edward Elric, being enlisted as a State Alchemist for the military county of Amestris. While he can research his goal freely that way, he must also join the ranks of other State Alchemists who are nicknamed as human weapons or "dogs of the military."
One of Edward's fellow alchemists is Zolf J. Kimblee, otherwise known as the Crimson Alchemist who specializes in turning anything he comes in contact with into a bomb. To put it the simplest way possible, Kimblee is majorly fucked up in the head. A deranged psychopath who loves the sight of blood and the sound of screams, he earned his fame as a State Alchemist during the Ishbalan extermination for killing the most people using his alchemy. Although he's crazier than a loon, he conceals his murderous disposition behind a facade of gentlemanly politeness, typically speaking respectfully to his superiors and unrelated civilians. Being an alchemist, Kimblee is incredibly intelligent and even has a photographic memory, employing it in ways like never forgetting a person's face or recalling the details of how he killed his victims. He also has a great respect for those who are committed to their work and follow through to the end, be it saving lives or taking them.
Sample Entry:
No, no, that was all wrong. It was supposed to be an implosion, not an explosion. How am I supposed to fulfill the position that was assigned to me by the Director if I only have incompetent base ingredients to work from? I know it's hard to find good help these days, Miss Gruagh, but when I ask for volunteers for my research, I expect them to be at least halfway decent. One of my jobs is to find unexplored ways to clear the population, and it's your job to assist me in gathering raw materials. Oozing limbs are still acceptable, but limbs falling off just won't do. I can't make my work beautiful if bits and pieces are missing, now can I? Please fetch me more hapless volunteers and I'll allow that frontal lobe you were nibbling on to pass by my attention. Go on then.
Now with that's out of the way, I can begin my other work. If I could have everyone's attention, please. Effective immediately, I will be your new supervisor in dealing with explosives and other combustible material. I believe my transfer orders were to "instruct in the proper use and execution of detonating objects within Camp Fuck You Die as you see fit." The heartmark at the end was especially charming. What these orders basically mean is that I will be watching over anything and everything to do with things that explode. What I've observed so far is paltry at best and not nearly as wonderful as it could be, and I mean to correct that right here and now.
- Ah, Miss Gruagh, you have impeccable timing. I was just about to demonstrate the correct way to handle explosives. If you could set whatever it is you're carrying around down for just a moment, I'll ask you to hold this. Don't grip the top of it too tightly now, it's likely to be pulled out and - What a waste of a perfectly good grenade. Good help really is rare here if the few semi-talented assistants are prone to fumbling. Ah, even my jacket got dirty. She was at least of some use if she was carrying something I can use for the next lesson with her ...
The next demonstration for today is to never let your guard down when it comes to explosive material. Can everyone see this fuzzy doll with the red bauble? Even this can be used as a bomb. Something as innocent-looking as this is ideal for an unsuspecting crowd and perfect for illiciting screams of terror. You there, the small zombie child that's hiding behind the tree, please come closer. You look like a smart child for one that's lacking brains. Come help me over here and hold this doll for me ...
Poll Vote!
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me if I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now VOTE. Closed!
Character: Sam Winchester
Series: Supernatural
Character Age: 25
Counselor Job: Grief Counselor
Canon: Take any supernatural creature you’ve heard of (and quite a few you haven’t), throw in two brothers fighting them as a part of the family business, add in the Apocalypse and one of these brothers turning out to be the Antichrist, and you’ve got the amazing adventures of Dean and Sam Winchester. They do as much as they can to fight off the dark, scary, and evil creatures in the world.
Sam is the youngest of the duo, AKA the Antichrist in training who struggles with the monster he’s becoming. In tune with this, he was once the softer, dewy-eyed member of the pair, sympathetic and understanding one-pretty much your typical bleeding heart. But he’s since embraced the darker parts of being a hunter: shooting first, understanding who needs to die, and being more forceful when someone gets out of line. All his sympathetic notions aren’t gone, though-Sam wants to see the best in others while he still tries to see the best in himself, believing that there’s a potential gray area to all things. It doesn’t help, though, when he gets angry and struggles with his darker temperament, especially while bent on revenge that will help save a lot of people. But he tries, he really does. And can’t the Antichrist be a good guy in the end?
Sample Post:
This is going to sound a little strange, but hear me out: a little birdie told me you were here. Well, actually, it was a full-grown toucan. I know that’s the kind of thing people say to poke into your business, but I’m here to help. See, they brought me in as a specialist after a lot of bad things happened. And at the end of this, your fiancé, Stephan? Turned up dead. What you’re doing and what changes you’re experiencing are only understandable. You’ve closed yourself off, become so depressed that all you want to do is hurt several hundred possibly guilty people with a bunch of zombies in a summer camp. … Hey, how did you bring back so many zombies, Miss Sayre? There aren’t any gravestones around here or even a mausoleum-and from the description of Stephan Debussey, none of them look a thing like him. But I’m sure, with the two of us talking like this, you’ll help me understand.
You see, none of this was a good idea. I know the distress that comes from wanting to find who’s hurt you. You want revenge, and sometimes, it doesn’t even matter if the person you’re hurting is guilty. And the people you’ve got here? Maybe they aren’t helping their cases, even if they’re innocent. They avoid you all they can and they don’t come around to say “hello.” Have you thought that they might be a little afraid of the toxic pink surroundings? It might even just be that you’re not in the center of things, because there’s a strange draw there, weird vibes and a mojo I haven’t quite figured out, like it’s alive. Anyway … you’ve gotta see that these things aren’t signs of guilt. Torturing them, handcuffing them together, and trying to force the truth out of them? Isn’t gonna force a confession. I know you’re desperate. I’ve been there, alone after you’ve lost everyone you care about. You have to do anything you can to help the pain. Anything.
This all probably sounds a little like some kind of after school special for dealing with grief-or, umm, the opening chapter of those Chicken Soup for the Soul books. Not that I’ve read those myself. Still, I’m here to help you move past your grieving stage. You might not find the one responsible for Stephan’s death right away, or ever, but you should do something productive with this energy in a healthier outlet. Knitting or … what about surfing the internet? Hey, maybe you can check out a good singles’ chatroom and realize you aren’t so alone in the world. With time, and a few awkward private instant messages, you might be able to move on. Just remember not to use this as another outlet for your mission. That won’t help you.
You’re moving around down there, so I’ll take that as a sign that you like the sound of that. Once you move past your grief, I can get you out of there and change you back into who you really are. I’ve never heard of transformation resulting from sadness, but I’m prepared for anything in this line of work, and what you’ve been through was obviously pretty traumatic. I mean, not only have you turned into something out of Japanese lore, but you apparently think it would be easier if you started anew and had all the rest of the birds here call you Marcy. But if you ask me? With all that pink, you look more like a Britney.
Poll Vote!
Character Name: Mibu Oriya
Series: Yami no Matsuei
Age: Mid-thirties
Job: Liaison to the Villainously Inclined (and secretly the Manager of the Best Little Zombie Whorehouse in Louisiana)
Canon: Throw in some dead detectives, a bucketful of angst, a pedotastic rapist and murderer, more unresolved sexual tension than you can shake a stick at, and a healthy pinch of humor. Mix well and you'll end up with the basic formula for Yami no Matsuei. Tsuzuki Asato and his partner, Kurosaki Hisoka, are shinigami whose job is to investigate supernatural incidents and help souls pass on. Their job is frequently complicated by Muraki Kazutaka, who appears to be a kind doctor, but is actually a powerful magic user and a very disturbed individual. Muraki is obsessed with gaining control of Tsuzuki's body for his own nefarious purposes, and does some horrible things in order to attract Tsuzuki's attention.
Mibu Oriya enters the story as Muraki's mysterious best friend. Oriya manages the KouKakuRou, a traditional restaurant that is secretly a high-class brothel, frequented by the rich and powerful. Oriya himself defies expectation. He lives a traditional lifestyle, wearing flowery kimono and mastering the katana, but he does maintain important contacts in the government and beyond. Oriya is a polite and graceful host, but also has a volatile temper that is easy to set off. Oriya holds no illusions about what kind of man Muraki is, but is friends with him despite that. This is the kind of man who will hide the bodies for you, while also yelling about the fact that the murders have even taken place. Where else could a psycho killer find a friend who is loyal, brave, willing to speak his mind, and happy to beat some sense into him when he deserves it?
Sample Entry:
Good evening, Zombie-san, and welcome to the . . . Best Little Zombie Whorehouse in Louisiana. My apologies for the lack of discretion in the title; from what I've been able to learn, it's apparently traditional. What idiot calls a secret brothel a brothel? Ah, I recognize you now, Zombie-san. That left arm really wasn't doing your form any favors, and has your face melted since we last saw you? In any case, thank you for always being such a good patron. Please feel free to relax and allow me to take care of everything for you this evening. The zombie jamboree will begin in another hour, but to keep your appetites whetted until then, the cook has prepared a special feast: monkey brains in a nice cerebrospinal sauce and--
No, I'm sorry, but we won't be serving any “red rum†tonight. No matter how enjoyable an evening it might create for some of our patrons, the clean up afterwards is always extremely costly. And, if I may trouble my honored patron with a question? No, don't bother attempting to reply, because I plan to ask it anyway. Exactly how stupid do you think I am, Zombie-san?! Did you really think I wouldn't recognize such a well-known palindrome? Or have your brains dribbled so far out of your ears that thinking has become too difficult for you? I have better things to do with my time than play silly word games. You will not be murdering any of my rotting flowers tonight, with or without my consent! If you want that kind of sport, go find it elsewhere. This kind of establishment would be impossible to run without well-trained employees, which I won't have if I let just anyone arbitrarily kill them off! Isn't having sex with a zombie close enough to necrophilia, anyway?
Tch, you're still here? You don't take a hint, do you? While my official job is to liaise to the villainously inclined, which is a category you technically fall under, I don't have to roll out the red carpet! Just because you like murdering the undead and having your way with the bodies of your victims doesn't mean I have to cater to your whims. Do you even know what a liaison is? A liaison encourages communication and cooperation, which are two concepts that seem to be entirely lost on you. At least this one doesn't think I'm here to have a liaison with him. I wish I had a dictionary to throw your way; it would probably make a stronger impact on you than my words do. It's not like another dent in your head will hurt the aesthetic you're going for.
But since you still seem so unwilling to leave, Zombie-san, I guess I have no choice. I have a very special lady who has volunteered to take troublesome customers like you off my hands. Now please, enjoy Marcy-san's floating world tonight. I'm sure it will be an experience that you'll never forget.
Poll Vote!
Character: Kazutaka Muraki
Series: Yami no Matsuei (Descendants of Darkness)
Character Age: 34 (post Kyoto-arc)
Job: Pediatrician
Canon: Sometimes when people die and still have strong attachments to the world, they are given the choice to become shinigami-- reapers or "death gods." Yami no Matsuei centers around Tsuzuki and Hisoka, two shinigami who work as detectives. Their job is to investigate mysterious deaths and situations in which people stay alive past their time.
One cause of such situations is Kazutaka Muraki. A genius physician with a charming smile, a tendency to wear white, and angelic silver hair, at first glance he looks like anything but a bad guy. After all, Muraki spends his time helping poor sick girls and selflessly offering his aid to random fainting boys. He claims he became a doctor to help people, and that his own limitations frustrate him. Clearly, this is the kind of guy you'd entrust your health to. But despite his ability to give a very good first impression, Muraki is actually a crazy murdering rapist who has the ability to absorb people's life force. His ultimate goal is to get his half-brother Saki a perfect body so he can kill him properly. He's been working towards this objective for years--years during which he's kept Saki's head perfectly preserved. In a jar. In an underground lab. Yeah.
But he's totally a good doctor. Really.
Sample Post:
I must admit this place is unlike anything I have seen before. It is truly fascinating. Trite as it sounds, I can't help being impressed by such large quantities of undead. To be able to reanimate a human body once it has stopped functioning is something out of a Science Fiction novel... I do apologize if it sounds morbid, but something like this can't help but appeal to my inner scientist. If I learned how, exactly, the dead nerves are re-animated, it would be possible to revolutionize modern medicine. Crippling spine injuries, such as the one Madam Sayre almost inflicted upon me, could become a thing of the past. --it was an accident, I'm sure. A woman of her stature and finesse would never resort to such brutality on purpose. I am certain there would have been no further accidents, even if I had not agreed to become part of the staff.
Well, I am here. There seems to be little point in fighting it, so I might as well make the best of things. Good afternoon, everyone. I am Doctor Muraki Kazutaka. If I am not concussed and the toucan was indeed telepathic, I have been assigned here as your new pediatrician-- a doctor who tends to children, that is. Although my assignment is specifically to look after children and teenagers seventeen years old or younger, I am more than capable of tending to adults as well. I have plenty of experience and have seen to several... ah, uncommon patients over the years, so should the need arise, please do not hesitate to ask for my services. Trust me when I say your case won't be stranger than what I have encountered before.
As for the children, sadly, the records I have been provided with are dreadfully lacking. Although I am sure that astrological sign and cooking skills are relevant in other contexts, from a medical point of view they are hardly useful, so we will have to begin by having every camper under eighteen years of age visit the hospital as soon as possible. I will be performing full physicals with the purpose of updating the camp records. Loathe as I am to describe these appointments as 'mandatory,' especially so soon after my arrival... Well, considering the toxicity of the lake, the manners of the local fauna, and... reports of sudden onsets of temporary insanity. Yes, I do believe it is of utmost importance to make sure you are healthy.
Form a line, if you would. I have robes should you want one.
Poll Vote!
Character name: Claire Redfield
Series: Resident Evil
Age: 26
Job: Zombie Apocalypse Youth Counselor
Canon: Resident Evil is a survival horror series, set in a world full of conspiracy, cheesy b-movie dialogue, with zombies that leave you notes like "Itchy. Tasty.". The Umbrella Corporation is a powerful pharmaceutical company, with research facilities all over the world and it’s hands in many government pockets. Whole towns, including the small mid-western town of Raccoon City, practically belong to the company. Unknown to most, the company does dangerous viral experiments, bent on creating the ultimate bio-weapon. Unfortunately, their safety procedures seems to be somewhat lacking, if the numerous viral outbreaks are any sign. In the midst of the resulting mini-zombie apocalypses, ridiculously skilled unlikely protagonists are forced to fight their way out through hordes of the undead and Umbrella’s experimental bio-weapons.
One such survivor is Claire Redfield, younger sister of protagonist Chris Redfield. She was just an ordinary college student when she went to Raccoon City looking for her missing brother, and became trapped in the zombie-infested city. Barely escaping with her life, she devoted herself to working for an anti-biological terror organization known as Terra Save. Used to surviving by the skin of her teeth, Claire is an independent and resourceful woman with a cool head and an occasional sarcastic streak. She’s something of a tomboy, with a deep love of motorcycles and an impressive knowledge of firearms. Quick to speak her mind, and quicker to act on her feelings, she might come across as a stereotypical tough girl. Though more than capable of holding her own, she’s instead chosen to embrace her nurturing side, helping the victims of bio-terror (re: Zombie Apocalypse) incidents. If her brother is involved, or there’s a youngster in need, or someone in
danger, she won’t hesitate to literally travel the world or face down unimaginable horrors to save them.
Sample Entry:
Hi, everyone. My name is Claire Redfield, and your camp director asked me here to talk to you about an important topic. I’m here to teach you what to do if you ever find yourself in the middle of a Zombie Apocalypse. Now, I know that it’s a scary idea. It’s alright to be scared. But the more you know, the less frightening it will be. You should always know what to do in an emergency, right?
The first thing you should know is that zombies are kind of like strangers. And I’m sure your mom and your dad have taught you to never talk to strangers, right? It’s the same thing with zombies. You should never, ever try to talk to them or go anywhere near them. If you ever see a zombie coming your way, what do you do? First, don’t scream. Instead, run away and find help. Go find an adult you trust, like your mom or dad or a police man -- as long as they’re not zombies, too. And if you can’t find an adult, remember this important rule: Shoot them in the head.
To make sure you’re all ready, you each get a copy of this guide book. Remember to pay attention to what it tells you, because knowing is half the battle. I know if you’re prepared and you’re brave, not only will you be alright -- but your mom and dad will be really proud of you, too.
Now that you’ve had a chance to look it over, it’s time to see how ready you really are. Everyone has a piece of paper and a pencil, right? Good, now I’m going to give you some questions. Try to answer them as best you can, okay?
Poll
Okay, everyone pass your quizzes forward. Let’s see how ready you all are for the Zombie Apocalypse. If you all do well, I have a special treat for you.
......alright, who’s the joker that wrote “Itchy. Tasty.” on their quiz in ketchup?
Poll Vote!
Character: Vincent Nightlay
Series: Pandora Hearts
Age: 23. Ish.
Job: Camp Seamstress
Canon: On the night of his coming-of-age ceremony, Oz
Vesalius was unceremoniously chucked into the Abyss by some charming
folks in hoods and cloaks. Not his best day. While down there, he met
a girl called Alice, also known as the "chain" (monstrous pokemon who
make contracts with people) Bea Rabbit - and with her help, returned
to the world. Ten years after he left, which we'll agree is a long
time to dally about eating cookies. Having escaped from the Abyss, Oz
and Alice are greeted by the organisation Pandora - and, neither
helped or hindered by the representatives of said organisation, head
off to patch up the holes in Alice's memories.
Existing to monitor the Abyss, Pandora is made up of representatives
from the Four Great Duke Houses, one of which is the Nightlay House. A
few years before Oz was kicked into the Abyss, they adopted a boy
named Vincent Nightlay, who grew up to be an exceptionally
pleasant and well-bred young man. Prone to continual smiles and
falling asleep in unusual places (thanks to his chain, the Dormouse),
Vincent strives for a good first impression - yet despite this, and
the fact he is a pretty princess, Vincent nevertheless manages to give
everyone he meets the raving heebie jeebies. There's a good reason for
that - Vincent is an unstable individual who continually plots against
everyone he knows, to protect his secrets and further his ambitions,
with no exceptions. While there is someone he cares about - his
brother, Oz's servant Gilbert - it doesn't stop him from using Gil to
further his ends.
Sample Post:
Mm? Ah, it appears I must have dozed off. I apologise about your
spine, I can honestly say that I had no idea it would be so fragile. I
really am terribly sorry. I didn't intend to extend my arm
quite so far ... and it was only the slightest of pressure ...
but it was an accident, most certainly. It's fortunate for you, I
suppose, that you can just place your head back on so easily. If you
couldn't, I suppose being apologetic would be a waste of time, hm?
It's a curious talent you have - I've seen several unusual things of
late, but never someone who can reconstruct their spine purely by
vigorously pressing their skull back to their shoulders. That's
very interesting indeed.
It's unfortunate that I chose here to fall asleep ... not that there
are many better places, are there? I suppose it's best to make do with
what comes to hand. Ah, no, that wasn't an invitation to give me
yours. As I was about to say, this ... substance on my clothes won't
do at all -- I do hope, sir, that it isn't yours. Especially since my
arrival in this charming place was prompted by a letter I
received asking for my services, and it's never appropriate to arrive
so mussed upon the first day of a new post. Even if the job
isn't one I have accepted as of yet. Still, although this place isn't
precisely what I expected, it's still better to make the best of
things; while I was satisfied enough in my previous occupation, it
would be dull of me to be closed-minded to a new experience, would it
not? Yet, I feel there might have been some mistake about the position
... for one thing, a seamstress tends to be female; secondly, I have
no particular prowess in sewing. I've never been entirely interested
in putting things together.
Still, if the position as "seamstress" is one this place is going to
insist I take up, I must add that it seems your seams
are somewhat ... lacking in cohesion. I would say, in fact, that
they're downright shoddy, especially in the shoulder area - you look
rather more like a lab attendant for a mad scientist than the
dignified gentleman which I'm sure you are. Haha, if I were you I'd be
perfectly miserable ... even you should know full well that you choose
the colour of your thread to match the colour of the material. That
should be off-green, as far as this case is concerned. There's only
one thing to do for you, I'm afraid ♥ - we'll have to start
again. While it may be an utterly grotesque task, I suppose I'll make
an effort to assist you ... I do, after all, have a pair of scissors
right here.
Come, now. Off with your head.
Poll Vote!
Character name: Hibiki
Series: Kamen Rider Hibiki
Age: 31
Job: Provider of Direction(s)
Canon: Once upon a time, a boy went on a boat and found a man who was singing to the dolphins, and who also rescued a small child from falling overboard. How is that important? Well, the details really aren't. This was just the fated first meeting between Adachi Asumu and our title character, Kamen Rider Hibiki! Hibiki, who is actually an Oni, fights for the Takeshi group to defeat makamou, which are monsters that cause terror and wreak havoc and are generally bad. The Oni do this by using pure sound, whether it be by a guitar, a trumpet, or in Hibiki's case, a taiko drum.
Hibiki works for the Tachibana family, one of the divisions of the Takeshi group. Prone to breaking out in random little songs, Hibiki is calm, relaxed, and a bit eccentric, whether it be by the somewhat strange way he speaks, or because he's generally inept at some of the normal things in life, such as driving a car, or doing anything with your cellphone that isn't answering it. He doesn't take things overly seriously, except his training as an Oni, which he is pretty passionate about. After all, anyone can do anything if they just train hard enough - and Hibiki is no exception to that rule, making him quite an athletic guy, whether he be hiking, or swimming. He's one of the older Oni, and acts as an upperclassmen to the others, whether it be teasing them, or acting as a mentor and offering sage pieces of advice.
Sample Entry:
♫ Marcy, Marcy, in the lake, makes you do a double take, something that you can't mistake, whoa--! ... Oh, so, so, so this is Camp Fuck You Die! ♫
Hey, I hope everyone is working hard. I think Marcy-chan definitely is. Ah, I'm Hibiki.
I don't normally get jobs in America, but you know what they say: Wherever you go, there you are. So, here I am! You're here too, so I guess we were supposed to meet. I'm here for a couple of reasons, and neither of them are anything like what I thought I'd be here for, but that's alright. Besides, I don't ever think I've heard of a makamou with quite so many legs-- Oh, I shouldn't talk about that. Don't tell my boss, okay? Ehh, anyway, let's begin!
Directions, wasn't it? Alright! I can tell you where to go, if you want. Map or not, this place should be pretty easy to navigate. Over the river and through the swamp, to Camp Fuck You Die we go. Heh. I know most of you know where all the big attractions are - mess hall, arts and crafts hut, alright, alright. Everyone knows those, so I bet you won't mind showing me? I think I got the least useful map Miss Director could send me. Electronic! Can you imagine? It's been two years since the last update, though I don't know how you'd update this... thing. It looks like a lot has just popped out of nowhere since then. But it's nothing to worry about. This is just a guide, a suggestion! We'll figure it out. Once this thing stops beeping at me, anyway.
Giving direction is a bit different than giving directions though. Everyone can say what they'd like to be, what they'd like to do. It takes a lot of courage to realize what that is, and to realize that what you'd like to do is different from what you must do. Just think of the people who've been here the longest. Yeah, you know. I'm talking about the rotten men and women here, although it's not fair of me to judge them like that. I might be a bit biased, but they're just doing their thing, following the beat of their own hearts -- aah, bad choice of words there. --Hey, there's no need to grab anyone else's hearts, you two! ... But you know what I'm saying. If you've decided to follow someone, or take from their example, there's nothing wrong with that, but that person can only show you the destination. The way you make it there is completely up to you.
So I guess what I'm saying is, my direction, or my directions, may not be a whole lot of use to you boys and girls. But we shouldn't let something like "may not be" and "not able to" discourage us from trying. You can't make an omelet without breaking a few eggs, right? We just have to remember to keep away from the ones laid by the fire breathing ducks. We can make it a fun trip for everyone, with a little work, you know! Yeah, that's right - training, and hard work!
Alright, everyone! Let's get lost!
Poll Vote!
Character name: Sohma Ayame
Series: Fruits Basket
Age: 27
Job: Arts and Crafts Director
Canon: Once upon a time, God invited 13 animals to a grand banquet. A good time was had by all, the banquet would continue every year, and all the animals took their place in the Chinese Zodiac. All, that is, except for That Damn Cat, who by no fault of his own, stood God up. Fast forward to modern day Japan, the banquet's still going on, the animals are hanging out in the bodies of one very, very special family, and That Damn Cat STILL isn't showing up for food. And still by no fault of his own. Add in a jealous god, an adorable girl with a unique world view, and a curse that turns you into your spirit animal when hugged, you have the general gist of your romantic comedy known as Fruits Basket.
And what is a romantic comedy without a resident expert on ROMANCE!? Ayame is the Snake of the Zodiac, and quite a fabulous one if he does say so himself. He's loud, energetic and has a force of personality which may be generally likened to a category five hurricane. His life's calling is to help people navigate the treacherous roads of Romance by his tailoring skills and unfathomably complicated logic. And, of course, through his 'romantic cosplay' shop, where dreams are specially tailored! When it comes to family, you could not find a more devoted brother WHETHER HIS BROTHER WANTS HIM TO BE OR NOT! Of course, most of this is a reflection of a very deep, older regret, and the best way he knows how to keep moving forward on his life and his brother's forgiveness.
Like most Sohma cursed by an animal spirit of the Zodiac, Ayame has several traits shared with snakes in particular... cold and heat intolerance, in particular.
Sample Entry:
HA HA HA! America, at last! While this locale was not particularly what I was expecting when I had received such a courteous offer by the Lady Director of this establishment, I can certainly understand why it appears as it does. Obviously, this could have once been a fine place, filled with the many wonders of the world across the ocean! Sprawling cities in neon, trod by only the most fashionable and well matched ladies and gentlemen~ The glamor of Hollywood! The scandalous heart race of a night in Vegas! The beautiful expanses of Yellowstone! Air conditioning! But... in breathless anticipation of having such incomparable people as myself, it had simply folded in upon itself and left a swamp in shame.
I am certain that its inhospitality is an accidental gesture of humility, if most assuredly related to my own arrival... SO! I offer both my condolences and my services! Rest assured! This is no mere empty gesture! I would not do such after having singlehandedly caused such inconvenience! NO! I will take the vacated seat of much authority known as the Arts and Crafts Director!
While, at first, to the uneducated ear, it may seem as a somewhat less glorified and if those would be so brash as to say it, useless, position. I must simply draw attention to its many uses instead! Yes, with these skills I may impart to you, you should be able to take up your own seams! Color coordinate! Build elaborate yet fully functional mansion-like abodes entirely of popsicle sticks and a bit of creeper which could serve as a functional getaway for yourself and your significant other. Or if sturdy enough, simply a get away, depending on which disturbing creature is shambling along at an alarmingly fair clip.
A-HA! I sense doubt! There is no need to conceal it! I had expected such a dubious stare, however, I am more than willing to prove my ability to you. There is nothing which cannot be done if you truly put your heart into it with sufficient determination!
While this process may seem mystifying, the rewards, I am certain, are incomparable. First, lay out that construction paper, wide and flat! Now, one may safely use twigs or average popsicle sticks if one is to glue them securely enough. Now, lay and secure them in long rows along the paper, converging to a point nearest you. Just like that! After that, simply, and carefully, pick up our newest construct up and wave it in my direction. Vigorously!
EXCELLENT~ While not entirely up to my own craftsmanship, a fan really IS an unrivaled demonstration of genius in the summer... Well! Now that I have regained my own determination! About that house~
Poll Vote!
Character Name: Zolf J. Kimblee
Series: Fullmetal Alchemist (manga version)
Character Age: Early Thirties?
Job: Explosives Supervisor
Canon: Fullmetal Alchemist is the story of two brothers who set out to bring back their dead mother by committing a taboo in alchemy and end up nearly destroying themselves in the process. Having committed a grevious sin, these brothers are seeking to restore their bodies to normal by searching for the legendary Philosopher's Stone. Along their journey, the brothers get caught up in military affairs, sinister plots of genocide, and more than a few dangerous distractions. One "distraction" is the older brother, Edward Elric, being enlisted as a State Alchemist for the military county of Amestris. While he can research his goal freely that way, he must also join the ranks of other State Alchemists who are nicknamed as human weapons or "dogs of the military."
One of Edward's fellow alchemists is Zolf J. Kimblee, otherwise known as the Crimson Alchemist who specializes in turning anything he comes in contact with into a bomb. To put it the simplest way possible, Kimblee is majorly fucked up in the head. A deranged psychopath who loves the sight of blood and the sound of screams, he earned his fame as a State Alchemist during the Ishbalan extermination for killing the most people using his alchemy. Although he's crazier than a loon, he conceals his murderous disposition behind a facade of gentlemanly politeness, typically speaking respectfully to his superiors and unrelated civilians. Being an alchemist, Kimblee is incredibly intelligent and even has a photographic memory, employing it in ways like never forgetting a person's face or recalling the details of how he killed his victims. He also has a great respect for those who are committed to their work and follow through to the end, be it saving lives or taking them.
Sample Entry:
No, no, that was all wrong. It was supposed to be an implosion, not an explosion. How am I supposed to fulfill the position that was assigned to me by the Director if I only have incompetent base ingredients to work from? I know it's hard to find good help these days, Miss Gruagh, but when I ask for volunteers for my research, I expect them to be at least halfway decent. One of my jobs is to find unexplored ways to clear the population, and it's your job to assist me in gathering raw materials. Oozing limbs are still acceptable, but limbs falling off just won't do. I can't make my work beautiful if bits and pieces are missing, now can I? Please fetch me more hapless volunteers and I'll allow that frontal lobe you were nibbling on to pass by my attention. Go on then.
Now with that's out of the way, I can begin my other work. If I could have everyone's attention, please. Effective immediately, I will be your new supervisor in dealing with explosives and other combustible material. I believe my transfer orders were to "instruct in the proper use and execution of detonating objects within Camp Fuck You Die as you see fit." The heartmark at the end was especially charming. What these orders basically mean is that I will be watching over anything and everything to do with things that explode. What I've observed so far is paltry at best and not nearly as wonderful as it could be, and I mean to correct that right here and now.
- Ah, Miss Gruagh, you have impeccable timing. I was just about to demonstrate the correct way to handle explosives. If you could set whatever it is you're carrying around down for just a moment, I'll ask you to hold this. Don't grip the top of it too tightly now, it's likely to be pulled out and - What a waste of a perfectly good grenade. Good help really is rare here if the few semi-talented assistants are prone to fumbling. Ah, even my jacket got dirty. She was at least of some use if she was carrying something I can use for the next lesson with her ...
The next demonstration for today is to never let your guard down when it comes to explosive material. Can everyone see this fuzzy doll with the red bauble? Even this can be used as a bomb. Something as innocent-looking as this is ideal for an unsuspecting crowd and perfect for illiciting screams of terror. You there, the small zombie child that's hiding behind the tree, please come closer. You look like a smart child for one that's lacking brains. Come help me over here and hold this doll for me ...
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